


The Thirsty Girl's Guide to Summoning

by Exstarsis



Category: Fate/Grand Order, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms, Fate/stay night - All Media Types, Fate/stay night: Unlimited Blade Works (Anime 2014), Fate/strange fake
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bonding, But also literally, Complicated Relationships, Crack Treated Seriously, Eventual Sex, Hair Brushing, Holy Grail, Isekai, Kinda?, Metaphysics, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Servants, Reverse Harem, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Summoning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2020-05-28 13:51:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 57
Words: 114,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19395469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Exstarsis/pseuds/Exstarsis
Summary: An amnesiac girl who only recalls the stories she learned via Chaldea arrives in a world where summoning works a little differently. Soon she has a fortress on the edge of collapse, an "unusual" mana recharge system and an increasingly troubling (and downright dangerous) collection of Servants, along with a metaphysical mystery and her own survival to sort out.





	1. Ren Falls Out Of Bed

**Author's Note:**

> This starts with Merlin but other familiar characters will be appearing.

_Soon, your story will begin. You’ll open your eyes to bright blue sky, and realize you’re falling. You’ll call for me to save you and although it’s impossible, I will be there. At first, I’ll be as confused as you. But only briefly, for I am, after all, myself. I’ll greet you as we both fall. And I’ll wait for you to tell me my name._

* * *

Waking up by falling out of bed is the _worst_ , especially when the ground is so far away it looks like a map and the wind’s screaming around you at a hundred miles an hour. It didn’t even really feel like falling. All the same, the girl knew. But at least the ground was so far away she had a little time to think.

She’d certainly been asleep only a moment before. She knew _that_. But who she was? Where she’d come from? Why she fell? Her memories were as empty as the sky.But did that really matter? Nope. Because the faraway ground kept getting closer. The only question she needed an answer to right now was “How do I stop falling?”

At that point, the girl noticed a complicated mark on the back of her hand, and a hundred stories about a hundred heroes bloomed in her mind’s eye. Any one of them could save her, if only they knew the person bearing that mark was in danger.

Too bad none of them knew. Even if she screamed, the wind would rip the sound away from her lips.

Nope. Nuh-uh. The girl refused to accept that limitation. She clenched her fist and the mark flashed brightly, sending her demand for help much, much farther than could a scream. The effort spun her around like a twister and the rising sun dazzled her vision. When the spots cleared, she no longer fell alone.

A man with white hair and a white cloak, and holding a black staff, floated beside her, a look of utter bafflement on his face as his head swiveled up and down. But when he noticed the girl beside him, he smiled as if enlightened. He said something, which happened to sound just like the wind roaring.

The cloaked man grabbed the girl by the arm and pulled her closer, until her hip bumped him. The shriek of the wind vanished utterly, although she could still feel it whipping through her hair.

“Well, this is no good,” said the man cheerfully. “And who are you?”

The girl blinked and waved her marked hand. “Don’t you know?”

Glancing at her hand, the man said, “I know what _that_ is, and what it’s supposed to do, but who you are? You could be so many people, and I haven’t a clue which.”

“Well, who are _you?”_ demanded the girl. She had a hundred (or more) stories in her head, but sorting through them to figure out who she’d called might take more time than she had.

“You have to tell _me_ that for this to work _,”_ said the man, and glanced down at the ground again. His lavender eyes laughed as he added, “But you’d better do it fast, or we’ll both regret it.”

Of course.

The girl slitted her eyes as she stared at the man holding her elbow. White hair, white cloak… Something tickled her memory and one of the stories she knew shimmered into focus. He wasn’t the star of the story, but he was there, in the background—

“Merlin?”

His smile widened. “Excellent. We’re halfway there, and also incidentally a bit over halfway to the ground. Who are you?”

“I don’t know! I don’t remember!” the girl wailed. “This isn’t how it’s supposed to work!”

Merlin cocked his head like the falcon he took his name from. “No? What’s wrong?”

“You shouldn’t need to know my name! I shouldn’t need to know yours! And I shouldn’t be FALLING!”

With a laugh, he said, “Well, it’s lucky you summoned _me_ then. Let’s see. You’re lucky… How about I name you Serendipity?” When the girl wrinkled her nose, he added, “And I’ll call you Ren for short.”

The girl blinked. “Ren…?” It sounded familiar. Perhaps not _her_ , but… _somebody_ from one of those story bubbles.

The ground was definitely getting closer. She could see the deciduous forest, a primitive village, a crumbling stone castle, all too close, coming too quickly. “Sure! Great! I’m Ren! You’re Merlin. Save me!”

Merlin’s fair eyelashes swept down and lilac light bloomed around them in an intricate magic circle, obscuring the ground that seemed only seconds away. “And thus the contract is formed.” Ren could see individual trees and she clutched at Merlin with both hands.

“Yes, that’s right. Hang on tight!” Merlin put his arms around her, tucking her head close to his chest as he rotated so he was beneath her. “Here… we… go!”

They hit the forest, Merlin first, and the thick canopy did _something_ to cushion their fall. Ren was alive by the time they hit the ground, anyhow, even if bruises and scrapes covered her skin and the final jolt knocked the breath clean out of her.

Merlin was still alive too, judging from the pathetic moans he gave as he twitched underneath her. As Ren gasped for breath, she noticed vaguely that all of Merlin’s body parts seemed to be there and moving, so as soon as she could, she rolled off him in case that helped. She stared up at the hole in the forest canopy they’d made, looking at the blue, blue sky.

“Owwwww,” moaned Merlin. “That hurt…”

“Why didn’t you do magic?” asked Ren breathlessly.

“I did… I did do magic. Or at least I _am_ magic, magic enough to survive that for you… Owwww.”

“You couldn’t cast a spell or something?” Ren turned her head to give the so-called Merlin a critical look.

“Oh, I’m not very good at spells,” admitted the man. “Swords are much easier, don’t you think?”

Annoyed, Ren said, “How the hell are you Merlin, then? And why was it lucky I summoned you?”

Merlin rolled over and met her gaze with his lilac one. “Two questions with a single answer! I’m not very good with spells, young lady, but I _am_ very good at _cheating.”_


	2. Ren Smells Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learning a little bit more about this world Ren and Merlin have found themselves in...

The newly named Ren’s eyes narrowed as she stared at Merlin, self-proclaimed cheater. Something else tickled her memory, and slipped away as she realized how close his face was to hers. He’d called her _young lady_ like an old man, but he didn’t look old. He had the smooth fresh skin of a child, at odds with the faint laugh lines around his mouth and those luminous eyes.

“Serendipity,” Merlin whispered. His breath puffed across her lips and she smelled flowers.

Ren jerked away and sat bolt upright, blurting, “Trash mage!” and then covering her mouth in shock and embarrassment.

Merlin pushed himself up, fumbling for his staff. “I see my reputation precedes me!”

Dropping her hands, Ren said accusingly, “I remember something about you. Merlin, the most untrustworthy of allies.”

“Aw,” said Merlin, rising to his feet and leaving a patch of wildflowers blooming in a little crater behind. “I stopped you falling, didn’t I?” He held out his hand to Ren: an offer to pull her to her feet.

Ren scowled. Luck came in two flavors, and she was starting to suspect she was the bad kind of lucky. What else could it be when practically the only thing she knew in the world was that she couldn’t trust anything her companion said?

And yet, he did have a nice smile…

She grabbed his hand.

Merlin’s long fingers closed around hers and he hauled her upright with a careless strength. “Did that jolt shake anything loose in that pretty head of yours? Like what you’re doing here?”

Flushing, Ren shrugged, yanking her hand away and hiding it behind her back. “No. Though I think I’m here to _do_ something, because in stories there’s always a purpose to summonings and I clearly didn't get here _naturally._ ”

Merlin said thoughtfully, “It’s true, when you think of it a certain way. I mean, entities like me don’t just show up _randomly_ to irrevocably alter young women’s lives—hey, hey, hey, why are you looking at me like that, Ren? Oh. Oh, _I see._ You know, I did say _randomly_. _I_ at least had the good manners to bring a destiny that one time.” He winked at Ren. “Anyhoo, that’s my point. Entities are summoned for a purpose, even if that purpose is just sipping sodas together. So you’re probably right!”

“Wow,” said Ren dryly. “It took you four times longer to say _Good idea_ than it took me to share the idea. Do you, Mr. Cheater, have any idea _what_ I’m here to do? Or _who_ might have summoned me?”

Merlin looked around. “I saw a village before we hit the forest. We could go and — hsst!” Mid-sentence, Merlin lunged toward Ren, catching her around the waist and dragging her deep into the underbrush away from their landing site. “Someone’s coming!”

A moment later, Ren heard them too. Merlin tugged her into crouching behind some leafy bushes, pulling his hood up and flinging the hem of his cloak over her head.

“Your cloak is _bright white_ ,” muttered Ren.

But Merlin only said, “Hush!” as a half dozen people burst into the new clearing. Ren immediately identified them as either bandits or survivors of some fantasy apocalypse, because they all wore different scraps of armor and clothing made from a variety of materials. And they smelled, like none of them had bathed or even walked in a refreshing rain for weeks.

The slender figure who followed them into the clearing, however, wore a complete set of matched light armor in red and gold, including a helmet. She put her hands on her hips and said, “Well? Where’s the sunshard?”

The bandits all looked around and shrugged.

“Argh!” said the figure in red and gold. “You and you, go guard the prisoners. Eleron!”

And a glittering black dragon bigger than a horse tromped up behind her and nudged her shoulder like a friendly dog.

“There you are,” scolded the armored woman. “Sniff around, find what fell. If a piece of the sun fell, it could burn the whole forest down!” She caught herself as if she’d said something wrong, glanced around, and then said more loudly, “It’d also make a fantastic weapon in service to my lord!”

Obediently the dragon began to explore the little clearing. As it found the crater with the wildflowers that the bandits had apparently been too oblivious to notice, Merlin’s hand slid around Ren’s waist, tugging her very close to him.

Ren stifled her instinctive screech at being grabbed, but the dragon’s head whipped around toward their bush anyhow. It trundled closer, stretching out a long ridged neck until it gazed at Ren and Merlin from only a few feet away.Merlin held Ren even more tightly, the cloak falling over her naturally so she could only see out through a crack.

“Hi,” whispered Merlin. “If your mistress is looking for another Servant, I’d be happy to volunteer.”

The dragon’s eyes narrowed and it turned away with a huff to gallop back to the armored woman. “Rrrrgghhh,” it rumbled, shaking its head.

“Really?” said the woman, looking disappointed. “Oh well. Good boy. Now let’s get those stupid villagers back to our camp so we can find the last summoner in this district.” She laughed a mean, humorless laugh. “That one’s completely incompetent, though, so capturing her should be easy as soon as we find her.”

A moment later the bandits had vanished, and Ren fought her way free of both Merlin’s cloak and his lingering arm. “What the hell was that? Why did you offer to go work for _her?_ ”

Apologetically, Merlin said, “I’m not one of those mages who can wave a hand and intone, _This isn’t the thing you’re looking for, move along,_ so I had to give the familiar a reason to do it himself.”

“Oh,” said Ren, digesting this. Merlin was _definitely_ untrustworthy, but also, unfortunately, clearly useful that way.

“Anyhoo, now hopefully you have some answers to those questions you asked earlier! Shall we go find this village and see what else we can learn?”


	3. Ren Is A Little Confused

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Ren grabbed Merlin’s sleeve. “No, tell me what you’re talking about, you jerk.”_
> 
> _Merlin closed his own hand over Ren’s on his sleeve as he turned back to gaze down at her. “Well, the ritual here’s a little different from what I learned, but it should have established a channel between you and me for ongoing mana transfer. I don’t think it did, though.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for so much setup... I'm trying to make it entertaining at least...

Ren followed Merlin through the forest, reluctantly trusting him to not lead her into the bandit group. Despite his voluminous cloak, he moved through the dense underbrush like a deer. But the pajamas Ren wore caught on every twig, and the soft house slippers didn’t do a thing to protect her feet from roots and pebbles. 

Around the tenth time she squeaked and cursed, Merlin silently pivoted to look back at her, his eyebrows raised in amusement.

“Didn’t you give King Arthur a magic sword? How about giving me some magic armor?” Ren grouched.

“It’d be a lot less effort to just carry you, although I’m really not one of those zipping-around kind of guys.”

“Harumph,” said Ren, and stepped over another root.

“Speaking of effort, there might be a leetle problem, young lady.” Merlin lifted a branch out of the way for Ren. “Maybe we should talk about it before we meet anybody else.”

“Fine,” snapped Ren, preparing to take everything he said with skepticism.

“Well… effort. So, the Naming you did stabilized my presence in this world, and bound me to you, but there’s one thing it should also have done, and didn’t…” Merlin paused and then said, “Oh, I think we’re coming to the village edge of the forest. Maybe we should discuss this later after all!”

Ren grabbed Merlin’s sleeve. “No, tell me what you’re talking about, you jerk.”

Merlin closed his own hand over Ren’s on his sleeve as he turned back to gaze down at her. “Well, the ritual here’s a little different from what I learned, but it should have established a channel between you and me for ongoing mana transfer. I don’t think it did, though.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means you’re supposed to be recharging my mana and you’re not. As to why…well, that’s not important right now. What’s important is that you really are lucky! Because unlike pretty much anybody else, I’m not going to run out… unless you demand things like magic armor!”

Ren squinted up at him. His white hair puffed around his head like a really misleading halo. Presumably he’d vanish if he ran out of mana. If he vanished but left behind a suit of magic armor equivalent to King Arthur’s Excalibur… Tempting thought…

“Young lady? Why are you smiling in that worrying way?” Merlin put a finger over Ren’s lips, which sent a shiver down her spine. 

She pulled away, releasing his cloak. “Just reminding myself who you are.” She quickly changed the subject. “You sort of said that bandit leader’s dragon was also summoned. A familiar? How does that work?”

“I’m figuring that out,” said Merlin. “You know, it’s really exciting visiting a world so different from the usual one. It’s like a whole new game or tv show. But there’s a lot to catch up on, if you know what I mean.”

And Ren kind of did, although she couldn’t explain it. She still felt all those bubbles of story in the back of her head: stories she knew but could hardly verbalize as anything but ‘stories about heroes who can be summoned to fight’. They felt like half-forgotten dreams, with details she only recognized after she learned them again.

“This village has certainly seen better times,” announced Merlin cheerfully as they emerged from the forest. A stream crossed by a damaged wooden bridge lay between them and the outskirts of a ramshackle village. Some of the half-timbered buildings had burned recently and a few of them still smoked. 

People still lived there, though they didn’t seem eager to meet strangers. Somebody ducked around a corner and a door slammed nearby. A dog barked, and the bark turned into a muffled yelp. As Ren and Merlin slowly walked through the village, more doors closed and shutters banged shut.

Ren started to get annoyed. She’d been summoned here for a reason, so why was everybody running away from her? At the very least, she’d hoped to find better clothes for this environment.

“Am I some sort of monster?” she demanded of Merlin as they stopped at the village square where the roof of the local well had collapsed. She felt her face and the top of her head. “Do I have horns or something?”

“No, no,” said Merlin. “I don’t think it’s you.” As an afterthought, he added, “Or me, of course. It’s probably those bandits.”

“Hah!” said Ren, and cupped her hands around her mouth. “Hey! I’m here to help you! Come out!”

Nobody came out.

Then, from the far side of the village square, a small hand beckoned from an open window. “Psst!”

Ren ran to the window and came face to face with a small boy with dark hair and green eyes. His gaze went to her marked hand and then met her own and he whispered, “You’re a Summoner?”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” She’d certainly been thinking about summoning a lot since getting here…

“Then why are you here?” demanded the child. “The Summoner’s Castle is that way. If you’re here to help, you should be able to see it. And if you can’t see it, you’re one of the bad guys!”

“Ah!” said Merlin. “We did see the castle, young one. So you see, we’re on your side!”

The boy regarded Merlin suspiciously, impressing Ren with his perception. “Well then, go there! Miss Ritsu is all alone and those bandits are hunting for her.”

“Thank you,” said Ren, and dragged Merlin away, around a corner, until they could just see the top of the crumbling castle beyond a hill to the west.

“The Summoner’s Castle, eh?” said Merlin. “And Miss Ritsu all alone. Well, well, well. Is this fate?”

For some reason the question made Ren very grumpy. “No, it’s a castle. And maybe there’s better clothes there. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up the Summoner's Castle and the Summoning Gate and hopefully more familiar characters... along with another discussion of Mana Transfer...


	4. Ren Is Ready To Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which new and old characters are introduced...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There goes my goal of a 1k chapter a day...

The Summoner’s Castle might have been a mighty fortress with elegant towers a century ago, but up close, right now, it was a dump. It had no gate, just a hole in the wall, and every tower had been shattered. Half the walls showed signs of damage, and the top corner of the central keep had broken off entirely.

“This _can’t_ be the place,” said Ren. “This is a ruin.”

“There’s strong magic here, though. Maybe they’re related! Why don’t you go inside and find out?”

Ren’s eyes narrowed. “What are you going to do?”

“I’ll be right behind you,” said Merlin, grinning. “But _you’re_ the Summoner, after all.” He made a shooing motion with his staff.

After a long, suspicious look, Ren said, “Yeah…. I don’t know how I feel about taking my eyes off you like that.

Exasperated, Merlin said, “Really, young lady. Maybe you should use one of your Seals to make yourself feel better?”

Ren glanced at her hand, but before she could answer, a voice from the crumbling castle said, “Oh thank goodness! Are you a Summoner come to answer the Call?”

A slight figure with orange hair peeked around the gateless passage through the wall. If this was the little boy’s Miss Ritsu, she was a lot younger than Ren had anticipated. Somewhere in her early teens, in Ren’s estimation.

“Maybe,” said Ren cautiously, and then decided to come clean. “Honestly, I think _I_ was summoned myself. And then I summoned him.” She jerked a thumb at Merlin, thought about it, and added, “Maybe.”

The orange-haired girl fell over, and then scrambled to her feet, her mouth open in a perfect O of shock. As she did, a floofy golden creature with pointed ears and a bushy tail scrambled up into her arms.

“Oh my, oh my, oh my, did you hear that, Foxette?” said the girl, her eyes huge. “Oh my goodness, I AM A GENIUS! Me! A genius! I always knew it! Nobody ever believed in me, but look what I’ve done! I’ve summoned a _person_. A _summoner._ ” Her eyes slitted suddenly. “But if I summoned you, why didn’t you come through the portal when I cast in my blood?”

Ren, knocked back on her heels by the girl’s triumphant crowing, swayed forward again. “I don’t know. Maybe you didn’t summon…” She stopped. The kid’s eyes had been so huge and hopeful.

Instead she declared, “I don’t know, but I’m here to help!”

Little Miss Ritsu said, “Yay!” and then hesitated. “Uh, do we have to fight first?”

“Ooh,” said Merlin, behind Ren. “Is that the tradition here?”

Ren gave Merlin a dirty look. “Hush, useless mage.”

“Wow,” said Ritsu. “You don’t know anything, do you? Well, come on in and make yourself comfortable and I’ll try to explain. I found some tea in the underground kitchen.”

This definitely wasn’t the summoning system Ren vaguely remembered. The small furry animal, called a foxette, was Ritsu’s first summoned familiar. The foxette was affectionate and apparently very magical, but poorly suited for defense or offense. Normally, summoners would use magic harvested from their first familiar—Ren didn’t really understand this part—to summon more of the same elemental alignment. But Ritsu, her town and the orphans she claimed to have adopted under threat, didn’t have time for that. So she’d taken the risk of a second blood summoning.

“The first one’s always easy.” Ritsu chattered as she fussed with a teapot in her underground hideout. “It almost never wants to fight, but after that… there’s usually a battle before you can bind them. Especially if you use blood, because then you’re aiming for something really different than what you already have.” She stole a glance at Ren and hugged herself with glee. “I’m so amazing!”

Ritsu too had a set of glyphs on her hand, differently shaped than Ren’s but apparently holding a similar power. “We can use them to power up our familiars,” Ritsu explained. “They usually come back after a few days unless we’ve done something really extreme. And then _we’re_ usually not around a few days later either, eheheheh.”

She poured tea in a little bowl for the foxette, and then served first Ren and then Merlin with tiny chipped cups. “So, you’re a—you’re Merlin? And you can talk! I’ve always wondered: what’s it like where familiars come from?”

Merlin laughed and tugged on Ritsu’s side ponytail. “Very boring.”

Ritsu nodded thoughtfully. “That make sense, because why else would you all be so willing to come here? Um, do you have high offensive or defensive capabilities?”

“Nope! I'm basically a bipedal version of your foxette.” said Merlin. “I’m afraid that in order to help you defend your village, the young lady over there will have to summon… _somebody else_. You said you had a summoning portal here?”

“Hmm,” said Ritsu worriedly. “Will that work?” She glanced down at her hand. “I guess if it turns into a battle I could use one of my Seals to help… if I really did summon a summoner, it _should_ help?”

Ren, annoyed by Merlin’s smirk, stood up. “I don’t have to fight them, I just have to name them. At least according to _somebody._ Let’s try this out.”

Ritsu brightened. “Of course. I should have known you wouldn’t be afraid. The portal is this way!” She ran out of the room, her little foxette trotting after.

“You’re very confident,” said Merlin, rising to his feet.

With a scowl, Ren said, “Shouldn’t I be? I’ve got _you_ on my side, an obvious bad guy, and a little girl who needs my help. Given that I have this mark, I ought to at the very least be able to summon a fuzzball. Although if that’s what I get, you’ll have some explaining to do…”

“Teehee,” said Merlin. “To be honest, I’m just as curious as you are to find out what you pull.”

“Come on!” called Ritsu. “It’s down here!”

The portal chamber had been constructed of stone below the central keep, but lines of blue magic reinforced walls that might have otherwise collapsed. Magical circles had been drawn all over the room and a shimmering blue field filled a large circular white stone frame that had been set at an angle to the ground. In one corner of the room a large book lay open, next to some empty paper wrappers, a jug, and a pile of blankets.

“There you go,” said Ritsu, pointing at the tilted portal. “I hope it works this time. I mean, properly. It was pretty scary when I cast in my blood earlier and _nothing_ came out. Really, _really_ scary…” Ritsu trailed off looking thoughtful.

“Is this your book?” called Merlin, already over in that corner.

Ritsu turned scarlet, darting over to snatch the book away from him. “Yes! Bad Merlin! Stay out of people’s stuff!”

“I like books,” said Merlin mildly. “Those looked like interesting stories.”

“They’re summoner tales. I mean, I had to learn how to be a summoner _somehow_ , right? It wasn’t like To—it wasn’t like there was anybody else to teach me.”

“So what do I do?” said Ren, inspecting the portal curiously.

“Well, basically, if you’ve got the Seals already, you cast in ten drops of blood and, uh, hope. I mean… that _works_ , at least.. There’s all these different rituals for trying to get specific familiars, but they don’t always work and they require a lot of stuff I don’t have.” Ritsu shrugged.

“Right,” said Ren. “Big drops or little drops?” She didn’t see anything useful for drawing blood lying around.

Ritsu said, “You have to decide, but some people think the more blood you put in the more powerful a familiar you’ll get.” She frowned, looking at the foxette prancing around her ankles. “I don’t know if it’s true or not.”

“Little drops, Ren,” said Merlin calmly. “In fact, I think I’ll take care of this, before your enthusiasm ends this story way before I’m ready.” He reached into one of the elaborate twists of his staff and pulled an _entire sword_ out. Then, while Ritsu goggled at him, he leaned the staff against the wall and advanced on Ren.

Ren, who found the sword-in-the-staff thing less surprising than Ritsu—bubbles of story, fizzing in her mind—still eyed Merlin warily. “Isn’t that overkill for little drops?”

“You’d rather gash your palm with a rusty, dirty dagger?” asked Merlin, and took her left hand. “This Holy Sword won’t leave an infection behind, and _I_ won’t cripple you.” Before Ren could really react, he’d used the base of the blade to painlessly nick the fleshy pad beneath her thumb.

“There you go. Ten or so drops. Don’t waste them.”

“As if I would,” said Ren, and held her hand over the swirling blue field, thinking of what she’d like to summon.

_A warrior._ A drop fell into the portal.

_A friendly, trustworthy warrior._ Another drop, and another. She felt dizzy, as much more than a few drops of blood was being pulled from her.

_Somebody who could protect, who could hunt down the bad guys._ A brief image flashed through her mind, so fast that all she could recall was pink hair and a shield and the sense that _nobody_ could be more trustworthy. Then the image faded beyond recollection.

Another drop, another, another. How many had that been? The light from the portal grew steadily brighter. Little Miss Ritsu said something, but Serendipity couldn’t understand it. She stared at the portal. Would something come out, or would she fall in? What would happen if she did?

Drip, drip.

She had to focus. _Somebody who could help this village…_

_Somebody who wasn’t a silly, untrustworthy mage._

Drip.

_Please, not another troublesome mage._

Drip.

A blinding white light filled the room and Ren’s legs gave out underneath her. She sprawled backwards, blinking, as a shadow emerged from the light.

“Ah!” cried a rough male voice. “You chose well! Eh? This isn’t right…”

As the light faded, the shadow filled in with color: a man in blue armor with dark hair, short on top with a long thin tail settling over his shoulder. He stared down at Ren with widening ruby eyes that matched the spear he held over his shoulders.

“What did you _do_?” Then his eyes narrowed. “Aw, I don’t care. Just tell me this, my lady. Did you summon me to _fight_?”

Dazedly, Ren nodded. He grinned. “Great! Now… information on this place is kind of… missing but I do know this: you have to tell me your name and mine. And _then_ we can get down to business.”

“I’m Ren… Serendipity,” she said breathlessly. “And you’re…” She closed her eyes, concentrating on story bubbles. She _knew_ this hero. He showed up in _so many_ stories. Blue. Not a Caster.

“You’reCú Chulainn, the Child of Light. Lancer.”

His grin widened as lavender light flared around them. “Not, thank God, a mage. Exactly so, my lady. Let the contract be formed!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I didn't get to more discussion of mana transfer... but I did get to the next summoning? Is that a win?


	5. Ren Makes A New Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“You see,” said Merlin to Cú, smiling faintly. “Our new mistress is even more rash than you. I hope you’re up to keeping her alive. But! For now, food is the topic. Food. Fuel. Mana.”_   
> 

Ren stared up at the Child of Light, her heart hammering in her chest as flashes of his stories flickered through her mind’s eye, as he _grinned_ at her, his ruby eyes sparkling. She knew sometimes he could be savage, but she could trust him. She knew, too, that he was genuinely _heroic_. Unlike—

“Well done!” said Merlin, reaching down to pull Ren up by her arm. Suddenly she felt very aware of the ragged state of her thin pajamas. “For a minute there I thought you were trying to replace me, but instead you’ve summoned a solid, obedient Servant. And he’ll fit right in with the fluffball, too!”

Cú’s eyes narrowed as his grin vanished. “ _You._ ” Then his gaze went back to Ren. “So this is one of those wars where you’ve got multiple Servants, huh?” He sounded a little disappointed.

“I think so,” said Ren breathlessly. “But you’re my first.”

A slow smile crept over his face again. “ _Am_ I now?” He tilted his head toward Merlin, who still held Ren’s elbow. “How do you explain him?”

“Who?” asked Ren, and then blinked. “Oh, him.” She glanced at Merlin, noticed the teasing smile in his eyes, and flushed. “Well, he’s not a warrior and he didn’t come through that portal, so if he _is_ here as my Servant, he’s Servant Zero.”

“Hey, that sounds pretty cool. I like it!” said Merlin, releasing Ren’s elbow. A wave of disorientation promptly passed over her and she swayed until suddenly her head bumped into a muscular blue chest.

Cú’s arm curved around her shoulders. “Calling me took a lot out of you, eh?”

As in response, Ren’s stomach grumbled loudly, and Cú laughed. “Well, easily fixed—”

He stopped as Ritsu wailed, “Oh no! I didn’t even _think_ of that!”

Raising his eyebrows, Cú glanced down at Ren, whom he still held close. “Your apprentice?”

Weakly, Ren said, “Ah… our employer… possibly. Our hostess, definitely.”

Tears brimming in her eyes, Ritsu said, “I don’t have _any_ food! I ate the last of what I had this morning. And nobody can get any more because the stupid Irregulars. They burned the fields and they’re staking out the berry farm.”

Cú gave a low whistle. “And you’re all civilians? Nasty.”

Ritsu nodded. “Everybody but me, now. They’re doing it _because_ of me. To try to get me to come out.” She set her jaw. “But I won’t. Not until I can fight them and _win.”_

Ren frowned, pulled away from Cú’s arm and walked over to the younger girl. But before she could say anything, Ritsu glared up at her. “There’s no point in surrendering, you know? They’ll just make me one of them. They’ve done it before. And I’d rather _die_ than give up like she—I’d rather _die.”_ Her little face twisted in anxiety. “But I have to do it soon or else my orphans are going to starve too.”

“Hey, hey, little miss,” said Merlin, tugging on her orange ponytail again. “My defensive and offensive capabilities may be weak but when it comes to picking berries, I’m A-rank. In a little bit, I’ll go get something. That is, _if_ my young lady can bear for me to leave her sight for a while?” He raised his fair eyebrows at Ren.

Ren glanced back at Cú and then at Merlin. “Sure. Why not go right now? The sooner I get some food in me, the sooner we can deal with these Irregulars.”

“You see,” said Merlin to Cú, smiling faintly. “Our new mistress is even more rash than you. I hope you’re up to keeping her alive. But! For now, food is the topic. Food. Fuel. _Mana._ ”

Ren stiffened, remembering their earlier conversation. Merlin said _mana_ with such relish she couldn’t help but dread whatever was coming next.

Cú, on the other hand, looked surprised as he apparently suddenly focused on the mana issue. “This… can’t be stable. Unless…”

“Little miss, could you explain to us how you channel mana into your foxette?” said Merlin deliberately, laughter threading through his voice.

Ritsu looked between the three taller people, and her arms tightened around her furry companion. “I pet him, and brush his hair, and give him baths. There’s special ribbons—”

“Wait a minute,” Ren demanded. “I thought you harvested mana _from_ your familiar, not the other way around.”

“I do both,” said Ritsu. “The grooming interaction creates a mana charge, which the familiars absorb. Then I pull the old wool out of the brush and roll that up into a ball and save it for later. It isn’t any good to them anymore, but it can be used to for more summoning, or to fuel all sorts of other magic.”

“There we go,” said Merlin, beaming. “I hope you packed a hairbrush, Child of Light. And with that, I’ll be off to befuddle some irregulars and pick some fruit.” He bowed, his pale hair falling over his eyes just as Ren recognized something in them.

“Hey—” she began uneasily, but Merlin had already dematerialized. She frowned. “I’m pretty sure he was hiding something.”

Cú stretched. “I can figure out what it was, and given the company, I don’t blame him. Don’t worry about it for now, my lady. I have plenty of strength yet.” He paced over to Ritsu and crouched down to inspect the foxette in her arms. “Hmm…This little one’s a pretty potent mana converter, too.” He scratched the foxette’s ears and it jumped out of Ritsu’s arms, scrambled up to his shoulder and rubbed against his face.

Ritsu said, “Hey!” and then subsided, staring in wide-eyed fascination as Cú laughed. “Are… are you two charging each other?”

“Eh?” said Cú. “Oh, nah. He needs you in particular for that. We’re just making friends. To be honest, I was thinking about going out and taking a look at these Irregulars you mentioned. I have a feeling they won’t be much of a challenge. But I don’t think this little guy is much protection, is he?”

“Not at all,” said Ritsu, an echo of old annoyance in her voice. “I mean, it’s okay now because my second one is a lot more useful.” She beamed at Ren with proprietorial pride.

Ren, hungry and tired, tried to smile back and then went to sit against the wall. She certainly understood the girl’s feelings. She felt that way herself when she looked at the tall, strong spearman she’d summoned.

She had a little trouble believing that she could refill his mana reserves just by brushing his hair, though. Hair brushing, petting, bathing… She could feel her cheeks warming. Even she could see the pattern under all those things. _Intimacy._

The thought both attracted and frightened her. It wasn’t something she felt capable of in her current situation, and yet if her current position demanded it… Well, she’d come here to help out. She knew _that_ in her bones. So everything else ultimately had to serve that goal.

Besides, hair brushing itself couldn’t be that bad. Strangers styled strangers’ hair everyday. Sheknew that the same way she knew the village was of an older style, that the castle was broken, and that she _had_ to find better clothes.

Ren visualized unbinding Cú Chulainn’s long tail and running her fingers through it. Then Merlin’s pale head interposed itself in her mind’s eye. She caught herself thinking about how soft his hair looked. Scowling, she shook the thought away. _That_ one wouldn’t need her mana. And maybe Cú wouldn’t either.

She closed her eyes to shut out the view of the tall man as he quizzed Ritsu on the local situation, and almost immediately fell asleep.


	6. Merlin Goes Berry Picking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cú looks around his new location.

The Lancer Cú Chulainn noticed the instant his new mistress’s eyes drifted closed, but he continued to casually draw out details of the local situation from their little hostess. The kid rambled on, her mood cycling rapidly between the helpless anxiety he expected from a child in her situation and an overweening self-confidence usually only found in the offspring of a god. He recognized _that_ from his own childhood, and decided he approved of the kid.

But as soon as Serendipity’s head slumped to one side, he put his hand on Ritsu’s head to stall her speech. “Just a minute, little miss.”

He carefully picked up his mistress to move her someplace more comfortable, and shook his head at the rags she wore. The Caster could have done something about them, but had clearly chosen instead to continue enjoying the flashes of smooth skin and gentle curves.

“Where’s a bed?” he asked Ritsu.

Ritsu bit her lip, swinging instantly back into _helpless anxiety._ “I’ve been sleeping in here, in those blankets. There’s not much furniture left.”

Pulling his mouth to one side, Cú tucked the young woman among the blankets. She muttered a curse and rolled away, curling into a tight ball. Thoughtfully, Cú let himself go immaterial for just long enough to get a sense of the actual state of the ruined castle, and then snapped back to Ritsu’s summoning chamber.

“What the hell happened to this place?”

Ritsu scowled. “We haven’t had many summoners the last few generations. So they let the castle fall apart. They thought maintaining it was too expensive, and would seem aggressive to other provinces.”

“Idiots.” Cú shook his head. “Though even like this it’d be more defense against those Irregulars than cottage walls. Why are you alone?”

“You’re an adult, you tell me,” said Ritsu sharply, and then added, more subdued, “I think a lot of them can’t even see the castle anymore. It hides itself from those who are anti-summoner.”

Cú eyes narrowed. Structures that hid themselves was the first suggestion of a challenge in this strange location. “Are there ways around that?”

“I don’t know,” muttered Ritsu. “But that dragon familiar keeps sniffing around. If it gets in here, that’s it. It’s over.”

“Nah,” said Cú. “Dragons aren’t my _particular_ thing, but trust me, I’ve killed plenty. Well, I’ll go keep watch.” With a wave, the Lancer dematerialized again.

He drifted around the castle ruins for a time: watching his summoner as she slept like the dead; watching little Ritsu as she zoned out brushing her little familiar’s fluffy fur; watching the surrounding forest for any unusual movement.

The whole situation was wrong. The young woman who’d summoned him was no magus. The Throne of Heroes had provided him with no information on his location… but it _had_ dispatched him. Even the components of the ritual had changed.

When Merlin wandered through the broken walls carrying a large basket of mixed fruit, Cú rematerialized and jumped down in front of him. “Let’s talk, you.”

Merlin gave him a distant smile. “Oh, I’d like that but the young lady did seem so hungry—”

“She’s sleeping still. Look, we’re going to talk if I have to pin you down. Why not get it over with?”

“Well, when you put it that way….” Merlin murmured as he set the basket down and stood, arms akimbo. “What can I do for you?”

Cú leaned on his spear. “I noticed you don’t call her Master. Why?”

Raising his eyebrows, Merlin said, “Does she feel like a Master to you? In my case, I named her, so it feels like a step backwards.”

“ _Nothing_ about this configuration feels normal,“ Cú complained. “This place is way outside the usual parallel worlds.”

“Yes,” said Merlin, that distant look on his face again. “I think we’re on another trunk altogether.”

Cú stared at him. “Then how did we _get_ here? How did _she_ get here?”

“I came because she sent me a _very compelling_ invitation, and you got here because she bled into a magic gate. Don’t you remember?” the mage teased.

“Yo, don’t make me cut out your heart this early in the game. My mentor would turn me over her knee if I missed your fingerprints all over that ‘summoning.’ What did you do?”

“Hey, hey, hey, take it easy!” said Merlin, flinging his hands up. He eyed Cú. “I wonder what your mentor would have to say about all of this. Maybe…” Cú swung Gáe Bolg up and Merlin hastily changed back to the original topic. “Okay, I may have hijacked a few systems and tied them together so she could call Heroic Spirits as Servants through that portal. A little.But she practically asked me to do it!”

“And how did _you_ get here?”

Merlin grinned. “I told you. She sent me a compelling invitation, just stinking of True Magic. Absolutely irresistable.”

Scoffing, Cú said, “That girl? No way. Impossible.”

“No, no, I’m not saying the Magic came from her. Somebody’s using her as a pawn. I think it’d be interesting to find out who, don’t you?”

Cú twirled his spear. “Even though you’ve twisted everything up, she’s still my summoner, and I don’t like thinking of her as _anybody’s_ pawn. So, yes, Caster. I _would_ be interested in finding that out.”

Beaming, Merlin said, “We’re agreed, then. Ah, but you won’t tell her my involvement in her summoning ability, will you? There’s no point in doing so; she won’t need my help on future summonings, and I think it might hurt that delightfully decisive character if you did.”

Cú made a noncommittal noise. “If you’re back for a while, I’m going to go check out these Irregulars.”

Merlin picked up the basket of fruit again and gave him a wave. “Enjoy yourself.”

“Well, yeah,” said Cú Chulainn, and dematerialized.


	7. Merlin Takes Off His Coat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin is a pain in the ass.

“Yoohoo, I’m home!” caroled a light male voice, but Ren didn’t want to hear it. She was alone, she’d always be alone—

“Hey, lady,” breathed the voice, right against her ear. “I’ve got that—whoaaaa!” Ren struck out as she jerked herself upright, her fist hitting something soft.

As she focused blearily on her surroundings, she consciously realized Merlin had returned and now sprawled on the floor next to her. A basket with some red and blue fruit rested on the ground just behind him, luckily just barely safe from being upset by his fall backwards.

Luckily? _Hah_. The last of the sleep fled Ren’s mind and she glared at Merlin. “You knew I’d wake up badly, and you did that _anyhow_.”

Merlin put his hand behind his head, his eyes closing as he laughed. “Ehehehe. You were just so cute when you woke up. Hey, hey, here, look what I brought for you. Those berry bushes were loaded.” He swung the basket between the two of them like he could hide behind it.

Ren’s nose twitched at the sweet, pungent scent. Then she decided forgiveness was good for the soul and took the peace offering. The berries came in three different sizes and colors, and each one tasted fresh and strange and wonderful. As she munched steadily, Ritsu knelt down beside her, staring at the basket.

“Where did those come from? We only grow the blueberries.”

Merlin snatched a berry right under Ren’s fingers and said, “I picked them from your village fields.” Then he popped the berry into his mouth. “Mmm, they’re delicious! Those fields must be legendary.”

Ritsu’s brow furrowed. “I don’t understand. I’m _sure_ —”

“He probably put them there himself before picking them,” said Ren after swallowing a mouthful. “Don’t pay any attention to him, Ritsu. He _enjoys_ confusing you.”

The younger girl looked between Ren and Merlin as her eyebrows drew down. Then she said, “Bad Merlin! Go sit in the corner!”

Merlin chuckled again and stood up before bending down again to pull a handful of berries from the basket. His knuckles brushed against Ren’s. A shiver ran down her spine. She kept her eyes down until she saw the hem of his cloak moving away.

Ritsu cautiously tried the unfamiliar berries and then said, “Hmm. They’re okay, I guess. Not as good as _our_ berries, but they’d be good in a pie together.”

After soothing her hunger, Ren peeked at Merlin, who wore a little smile as he flipped through Ritsu’s book. Watching for his reaction, she deliberately said, “Thank you for the food, Merlin.”

His little smile became a wince. He glanced up. “Hey, did I hear you say you wanted some new clothes earlier?”

Narrowing her eyes, Ren said, “Yes. And you said they’d require too much energy to make.”

Merlin waved a finger. “I said creating magical armor along the lines of Excalibur would require too much energy. Ordinary clothing isn’t a problem!” He stood up and plucked a single extremely long hair from the back of his head. “Just step this way.”

Ren swallowed another mouthful of berries and stood up. Even recognizing his behavior, she scowled. He knew exactly how to piss people off while doing things for their benefit, and she didn’t like being so easily misdirected.

After she moved closer to Merlin, he flicked the silvery hair at her. It moved magically to spiral up her arm and around her torso, before puffing into a brightness that obscured everything. As the spots faded from Ren’s eyes, her pajamas fluttered against her skin and then _changed._ Violet ribbons tightened around her and merged into a fitted bodice with a short flared skirt, black leggings and high-top laceless sneakers.

“ _Wow_ ,” said Ritsu. She held up her foxette. “Learn to do _that,_ okay?” The foxette chirped agreeably.

Ren peered down at herself, smoothing her hands over the soft fabric of the bodice. She could tell at a touch that the fabric was breathable and organic in origin, but not a common material. The skirt had layers that supported its flare without weighing her down, the leggings made sure she’d be comfortable even when it was hot, and the shoes had flexible, flat soles.

“Hmm,” she said. Even though she really had nothing to complain about, she felt vaguely dissatisfied. After a moment, she realized it wasn’t the clothing itself that displeased her, but the method of obtaining it. “How long will it last?”

Merlin, who had been watching her with appreciative amusement, said, “Oh, a little longer than I do. ”

“Well, okay,” Ren said. “Thank you.”

His smile flickered and then broadened. “Now, since we have to wait for that Lancer before we make any plans, you can indulge my curiosity by coming outside and showing me your skills. You too, Ritsu.” Without waiting for a response, he vanished into the subterranean hall leading to the courtyard.

“Oh dear,” said Ritsu, and pattered after him. Ren stood alone in the summoning chamber, running her hands over the skirt, trying to tame her sudden apprehension. She discovered slits in the overskirt that went to pockets in the underskirt. Useful. Unusual. And they didn’t help her apprehension at all.

“Come on, Serendipity,” called Merlin, and sighing, she went.

* * *

“What skills do you think I might have, given that I can’t remember who I am?” Ren asked as she and Ritsu stood before the mage.

“You can talk,” countered Merlin. “Anything you’ve practiced sufficently in your previous life should still be there. But what I’m most curious about is your ability to defend yourself. A Master, or Summoner,” he nodded at Ritsu, “can’t just expect to sit on the sidelines when their Servant is in battle.”

“Well, some do, at least in the stories.” said Ritsu. “But they’re usually losers or bad guys.”

“What do winners and heroes do?” inquired Merlin, although he kept his gaze on Ren.

“They work with their familiars somehow.” Ritsu shrugged. “Maybe they fight alongside them, if they know how to do that. Or maybe they learn magic to make their familiar’s job easier. Or, if they have a lot of familiars, they might be really busy coordinating all of them.”

“And you, Miss Ritsu?”

Ritsu gave Merlin a jaded look and put her furry golden companion on the ground. “Get him, foxette!”

The foxette looked between Merlin and Ritsu, and then scrambled up to Ritsu’s shoulder where it bared its teeth and growled like an angry kitten in Merlin’s direction. “I run away,” concluded Ritsu bitterly.

Merlin beamed at her. “Smart girl. But I bet you can learn a little magic, too. I’ll talk to you about that later. First…”

He walked right up to Ren and pushed her shoulder hard. She stumbled backward and he promptly swept his staff against the back of her leg. Her stumble turned into a sprawl, but she twisted as she fell, landing on her bicep and using the momentum of the fall to roll back up to her knees.

“Hey! I just got these clothes five minutes ago!” Ren bounced to her feet and checked herself instinctively for rips and snags. When she glanced up, her self-inspection was arrested by the intensity of Merlin’s lavender gaze.

Then he laughed. “Ahaha, sorry about that. It wouldn’t have worked as a test if I’d warned you! You fall well!”

“Thanks,” muttered Ren, suddenly keenly aware that somebody with any kind of combat training probably wouldn’t have let Merlin’s heavily foreshadowed shove happen.Or maybe he’d expected her to realize what was coming and simply run away, like he’d praised Ritsu for doing. “Can you teach me magic, too?”

“Nope. Let’s see how you handle a sword, though.” Once again, he pulled a sword from the central twist of his staff before laying the staff aside, but this time he held the sword handle-first toward Ren.

Awkwardly, feeling painfully self-conscious, Ren took the sword, first in one hand and then with both. The tip dipped as she struggled to figure out the correct grip. Suddenly Merlin stood behind her, looking over her shoulder.

“Like this,” he murmured. His arms closed around her as he put his hands over hers, adjusting them so the sword wasn’t quite so uncomfortable to hold. His breath puffed against her cheek and she went hot all over. “There you go.” His head turned so his nose just skimmed her hair and then he withdrew.

“Yes,” he said, smiling as he once again appeared in front of her. “I’ll teach you how to use that. Much more your style!”

Ren swished the sword back and forth and adjusted her feet to a position that felt stabler. Harder to knock over. “All right. Now?”

“Yes!” He paused and she waited. After a minute she realized he was waiting on something from her.

“Well?” she demanded.

“Go ahead and attack me!” He waved hisarms, flapping his long sleeves at her.

Ren stared at him. “You’re not even holding your staff. What if I hurt you?”

He laughed. “That won’t happen. You won’t even hit me. But you should try, all the same.”

Annoyed, Ren stalked toward him. He stood still, until she swung the sword at him, at which point he stepped out of the way.

Flapping one sleeve again, he said, “You know, enemies don’t stand still for you to hit them.” She turned toward him and he backed away. This time when she followed him, he kept moving.

Irritated, she launched into a run, swinging the sword as she did.

Once again, he simply stepped aside, smiling at her. She stopped abruptly, pivoting, letting the swing of the sword pull her around, and his step turned into a skip. Then he ran lightly over to the other side of the courtyard. “You know, I don’t think I even need this yet.”

He stripped off his mantle and the jacket with the flappy sleeves and hung them on his staff, then swept his pale hair back and stood with his hands on his hips. Although they’d been almost entirely hidden by mantle, jacket and hair, he wore a tight, sleeveless black shirt and loose black and gold trousers. Somehow without his jacket and mantle, he looked like a different person.

But when he grinned and said, “Or are you giving up already?” the illusion shattered. Once again, Ren stalked toward him, leaning the sword against her shoulder as she shook out first one cramping hand and then the other. He moved away.

“What is this supposed to be teaching me?” Ren demanded, and then jumped forward, stabbing out with the sword faster than he’d been moving.

With his bare hand, he smacked the flat of the sword to one side, a strike Ren could feel in her upper arms. “Oh, all sorts of things. Come on, I bet you can do better than this. Hit me and maybe I’ll tell you.”

She jerked the sword back toward him. He hopped backward before pivoting around her and leaning forward to tuck her hair behind her ear. She whipped the sword toward him and he swayed and ducked away, laughing.

After that, he ran away more, and she chased him, half-annoyed and half-determined. He kept teasing her to keep attacking him despite her growing weariness. She could see how laughably slow her swings were but that didn’t discourage her. She didn’t have the training for this, so of course she’d be slow. And as she slowed further, her muscles burning and aching, she watched him until she determined a deliberate pattern to his retreats.

She simply didn’t have the speed to take advantage of that right now, but if he trained her another day…

Then Ren realized that Ritsu had stealthily positioned herself behind Merlin: not where he was, but where he’d be the next time Ren charged at him. She tightened her nearly-numb hands on the sword and, without thinking too hard, lunged at him.

Ritsu crouched down behind him as he danced backward, and he ran right into her. His arms pinwheeled as she pushed up and he tumbled over her, head over heels, landing on his hands and knees in the dust.

Ren dodged around Ritsu and skidded to a halt over Merlin, bring the sword around toward his upturned head. She knew how slow she was, but he didn’t roll out of the way, allowing the flat of the blade to smack his shoulder.

Pushing himself back to sit on his haunches, he said, “Very good, Ritsu! Ren… you’re supposed to hit people with the sharp side, you know.”

She scowled. “But I hit you all the same. Tell me the point of all this.”

Merlin took the blade between two fingers and a thumb and twisted it right out of Ren’s hands, catching the handle with his other hand. Suddenly her hands hurt terribly and she gasped, trying to flex stiffened fingers. Somehow doing that made the rest of her body’s aches speak out: her stomach, her legs, her arms, her shoulders…

“Technique is pointless without conditioning,” said Merlin calmly. “You _did_ fall well. You’ve practiced. Your muscles remember even if you don’t. But your muscles didn’t know anything at all about moving with a sword. Now, they’ve got a starting place—”

 _Lady,_ came Cú’s voice in Ren’s mind, right before he materialized among the three of them. He looked irritated. “Yo, I have intel and you’re probably not going to like it. Short form: we’re not the only Throne Servants here.”


	8. Cú Meets An Old Friend

At Cú’s announcement, Merlin clapped his hands once, holding them together in front of his smile. “How astonishing,” he murmured, in anything but astonished tones. Then he strode away to redon his jacket and cloak.

Ren followed him with her gaze, noticing how his overgarments made him look… _smaller_ , somehow. Between the staff and the long sleeves, he managed to appear spindly—something obviously not the case.

 _More trickery_ , Ren thought, and returned her attention to Cú, who nobody could ever mistake for anything other than a warrior. “So you encountered another Servant? How? Who?”

Cú spun his spear absently, his gaze roving around the castle ruins. “I went out to take the lay of the land, and the measure of these Irregulars. This area is… a mess. Whatever the source of the problem, the local gang is just the smallest piece of it.” He frowned. “It’s odd in other ways, too. Very clear, regular borders, and it’s obvious this is the last local territory still holding out against invaders.”

“Obvious how?” Ren asked, glancing at Ritsu, who had been nodding along.

“There’s a pillar of darkness rising from each of the territories bounding this one,” said Cú bluntly. “Like a marker on a map made manifest.”

“I bet those are the fallen summoners’ castles,” said Ritsu. “I heard that once they catch all the summoners, they get into the castle and corrupt the summoning portal somehow, so there won’t be any new summoners except the ones the Sovereign Council makes.”

Ren considered this and nodded. “But now there’s me. Or, well, him.”

Cú scratched the back of his head. “Uh, yeah. And you know, just surveying the mortal troops, I was inclined to agree with you. They’re badly trained, barely more than the bandits they look like. Even when I was alive they wouldn’t have been much of a challenge for myself and, say, a nine year old girl, and _now_ …” He shrugged, and Ren understood. The Servants she could summon tended to be significantly more powerful than the versions that had once walked her original world.

But Cú went on. “Now, those familiars are a different story. They’re a lot more powerful, but there’s not that many of them. Most of ‘em seem to serve that woman in the red and gold armor.”

Ritsu’s face darkened. “You saw Tora?”

“Was that her name? Yeah, I saw her.” Cú paused, his brow drawing together as he looked down at the young girl. “You two… she a relative of yours?” But when Ritsu only looked away in response, he shook his head and returned his attention to Ren. “Well, I figured you’d want to be involved in taking down the local leader, but it’d be helpful to get rid of the dragon ahead of time. Ritsu said something about it sniffing out the castle. So I went ahead and did that.”

Merlin rejoined them. “So casually, Child of Light?”

Cú gave Merlin a sideways glance. “Well, it would have been if…. Tora, was it? Hadn’t gotten involved. She at least kept it from being dull.But in any case, I didn’t exactly have to get fancy. The dragon faded like we do when defeated, and I made sure to leave Tora in a state she could heal from.”

He frowned again as Ritsu, still looking away, made a stifled sound. “I hung around after I dematerialized to make sure none of her incompetent subordinates stabbed her by accident, but they didn’t really have a chance. She pulled out this mirror…”

Merlin’s gaze sharpened. “What did it look like?”

“A hand mirror, made from blackened silver, I’d guess. Ornate. Even the glass had been blackened. She smeared her blood on it. And her dragon rematerialized.” He let out a breath. “And then the black dragon went _inside_ of her, and, well…” He gave Merlin an inscrutable look. “She turned into a Saber. One in black armor, with a blackened Holy Sword.”

Merlin’s eyes widened and then narrowed. He tapped his mouth with a finger, his gaze going faraway.

Ren grimaced. “An Alter-type Pseudo-Servant? Can you beat her?”

“Oh yeah,” Cú assured her. “I’m pretty sure I can, one way or another. Alters aren’t exactly known for being flexible thinkers.”

But Merlin chortled suddenly. “All the same, you got out of there in a hurry once she showed up, didn’t you?”

“Um,” Ritsu inserted herself with a small voice. “What are you all talking about? What happened to Tora? I’ve never heard of a familiar going _inside_ somebody. Well, not in a good way.”

Merlin tugged on her ponytail lightly. “Your Tora has basically been replaced by somebody faster, stronger, smarter and _definitely_ better-looking than the Child of Light here. I don’t know if it’s permanent or not. We’re in a whole new world.”

“Does that mean we’re going to lose?” asked Ritsu, still bewildered.

“Oh, probably not. Ren will just have to summon another Servant to help our Lancer out.”

Ren’s mouth pressed together tightly as Merlin gave her a saucy, sparkling look. He was trying to provoke her somehow, but she wouldn’t rise. She had more important things to think about, anyhow.

Meanwhile Cú, his spear across his shoulders, looked unimpressed with Merlin’s teasing. “We’ll see.” He cast his gaze over Ren. “Unless my lady also doubts my strength?”

Maybe it was the way he called her _my lady_ instead of the more traditional _Master_ that made her want to respond to Cú’s query with a courtly gesture. Maybe she thought on some level it would annoy Merlin the way he’d annoyed her. Whatever the reason, she stepped close to the Lancer, put one hand on his chest to steady herself, stood on her tiptoes despite the ache in her legs, and pressed her lips against his.

She’d intended a chaste kiss, a kiss of confidence, but as his hand settled at her waist, she had a split-second of realizing she had no idea what to do if he misunderstood. But although his mouth softened against hers and his hand tightened on her hip, he took no liberties. And when she disengaged, he only looked at her warily.

“I… I have the… the utmost faith in you, my Servant,” she said, and cursed herself for stumbling over her words. Her cheeks flamed. So much for her courtly gesture.

She dropped her gaze so she couldn’t see Cú’s expression. “Um, Ritsu, would you come back to the portal and tell me more about the Summoner’s Castles? They seem… important.” Then, without waiting for an answer, she hurried away.


	9. Cú and Merlin Take Turns

Cú Chulainn blew out his breath as his mistress vanished into the depths of the shattered keep, Ritsu following behind. Ren’s mouth had been sweet and warm and her blush adorable, but she’d kissed him like a child emulating a fairy tale, for all that she was eminently _not_ a child in body. And yet he’d responded to her all the same. He almost—but not quite—regretted that she hadn’t meant it.

“My goodness,” said Merlin lightly. “Were you as surprised by that as I was? _Such_ a rash girl.”

Cú gave the mage a narrow look. “I’m not interested in being a pawn in her flirtation with you.”

Amusement flickered on Merlin’s face. “Do you think that’s what it was?”

“Oh yeah. I’ve been used by enough women to recognize _that_ when I see it.”

“Hmm,” said Merlin, looking at where Ren had vanished into the keep. “I could say the same, and yet what I see is that she simply can’t keep her eyes—or hands—off you.”

The Lancer stared off into the distance, remembering. Cú had never been averse to dalliance, even in his Servant afterlife. But dalliance was the opposite of attachment, and he couldn’t help but be attached to whomever he’d sworn to serve.

Even if he knew nothing about her beyond her fierce gaze and hot mouth.

In any case, it was harder to obey orders when you were fucking the person you were fighting for. Sometimes in his life it had been… unavoidable. But this time, with this near-child…

He realized abruptly that Merlin was _grinning_ at him and sighed. “Hey. Listen up, you. Don’t make things complicated, or else I’ll get annoyed. I’m usually a pretty easygoing guy. Let’s keep it that way.”

“Now, now, that’s not really fair, is it? Sometimes things get complicated all on their own. I don’t want to be blamed if _that_ happens. Well. At least I don’t want to be stabbed, you know?”

Cú squinted at Merlin and then pivoted, taking a few steps closer to the broken fortress wall. “Then maybe you should work on helping things stay simple instead.”

Merlin drifted after him. “Are you _really_ the Hound of Ulster? I never heard he was such a stick in the mud.”

“Yeah, that’s another reason I hate you—” Something dark flashed near them, something Cú had been waiting for, and he and Merlin both instantly leapt back from ground zero as a beam of black light exploded through where they’d been. The very air sizzled, and even though Cú had been prepared, even inviting the attack, he was still taken aback by its intensity.

The black beam had destroyed another section of fortress wall before exiting through the previously-existing hole, scattering some rubble but simply silently slagging most of it.

“There she is,” said Merlin happily, but flung a taut hand toward the entrance to the fortress where the girls were. A barrier of light traced itself over the opening. It wouldn’t stop the Servant known as Artoria Alter for more than a few heartbeats, but it would at least keep their reckless Master from charging into the middle of a battle.

Cú bounded over to the dark beam’s entry point, climbing over some rubble to look down the path of blasted trees into the forest, whistling at the devastation. Far away, the blackened King of Knights stalked toward them, the distant clang of her ebony armor a grim music.

Merlin called, “Do you still think leading her here was a good idea?”

“Eh. As soon as she transformed from that dragon I knew she’d find the fortress. You were still here, after all.” Cú watched the Saber advance, a grin widening. Then he darted toward her, only halting a few yards away as she swung her sword to point at him.

“Get out of my way,” she said flatly, “If you do, I’ll let your Master live. This is no Grail War. All I want now is the child.”

But Cú Cuchlainn only chuckled, and lowered himself into a fighting stance.

* * *

Merlin sighed as he watched a battle erupt between Cú and the darkened form of his one-time protégé. Really, the Child of Light and Serendipity made a perfect pair: each one reckless, over-confident, dependent on Merlin to keep them alive. Well, he’d do his best, if only to keep this odd story he’d found himself in going.

He leaned against the broken wall and watched as Artoria Alter slowly but steadily forced Cú back down the path she’d created to the Summoner’s Fortress. Merlin noticed when Ren and Ritsu started banging on the barrier he’d erected, but he didn’t bother turning around, only waving his hand behind his back in a vaguely reassuring way.

Abruptly, Cú disengaged entirely, leaping back to land just within the fortress wall. He wasn’t even that out of breath. With a crooked smile, he said, “Over to you, Kingmaker.”

Merlin said, “So you _can_ use strategy, Hound,” and shook his hair back as he stepped away from where he’d been lounging.

“Artoria,” he called. The woman in black armor looked at him with flat golden eyes, and Merlin felt that strange, rare pang of emotion that only she had ever made him feel. This version of Artoria both _should_ and _shouldn’t_ exist. _Shouldn’t,_ because she hadn’t, because the girl-child he’d bred and raised and used had a heart even he couldn’t break until he’d abandoned her. And _should_ _have_ because he hadn’t cared one bit about her heart when he’d built her.

That golden gaze inspected him, judged him, and found him wanting. “You,” she said with disinterest, and looked away to where Cú had fallen back.

“Hey, hey, hey, pay attention,” said Merlin, tapping his staff on the rubble. White and pink flowers bloomed over the stone and flowed toward Artoria. When they touched her metal boots, suddenly the two of them were in an endless green meadow, where once upon a time he’d trained her in dreams.

He’d wanted to revert her back to the child she’d been, too, or at least the illusion of such. But the blackened armor and the tyrant’s heart resisted that most intimate of changes. She frowned, looking down at the flowers around her and then raised her gaze to Merlin again.

“This land shall not be your new playground, magus,” Artoria said dispassionately, as a dark aura kindled around her. The pressure rolling off her made Merlin sway back. Suddenly she spun and caught Cú Chulainn’s red spear with her blade. Merlin’s illusion fragmented around the Irish warrior as he once again engaged her.

Merlin set his teeth. The easy solution hadn’t worked. It never did with Artoria, but he still kept trying. Now it was time to get into the gritty details. While Cú engaged her, Merlin used the tiny part of the illusion Artoria _had_ accepted—the scent of the grass crushed underfoot—as a backdoor to explore the magic that had summoned her.

 _That mirror…_ That mirror tapped into something unpleasantly familiar, and bound her tightly to her current form. It took him only a moment to determine that without some kind of physical access to the actual mirror, he couldn’t quickly unravel anything.

Only a moment, but it only took a moment for Artoria’s dark aura to both batter through his illusion and send Cú flying against the fortress wall. Artoria didn’t even bother to confirm he was down, simply striding on toward the fortress.

It was a surefire way to piss Cú off. He rose to his feet, without his usual bounce and with a grim expression on his face. Blood streamed from his head and one leg. He set his spear low, his eyes glinting.

 _Wait,_ Merlin told him telepathically. _I’ll just give you a hand first…_

He couldn’t easily undo what had summoned Artoria, but he still had access to the fundamental matrix he’d been analyzing. It was a simple enough matter to briefly pinch off the flow of foreign mana empowering her. He did so.

As Artoria kept walking toward the fortress, he frowned. _That usually works,_ he sent absently toCú.

But that was just the first of a few things that went wrong all at once. As Cú shook his head, Serendipity’s voice suddenly echoed in Merlin’s head with an unexpectedly binding force.

_Never keep me from a battle._

At the same time, something burned through the barrier he’d placed to protect the girls. It was the Seal on Serendipity’s hand, combined with a frankly amazing aura radiating off Ritsu’s little foxette.

“Gáe—” began Cú. He’d already been seriously injured by Artoria Alter. But the fool probably felt it was the only thing left to do.

 _Don’t sacrifice yourself for something so stupid,_ Merlin snapped mentally. _You’ll miss. You always miss._ He ran after Artoria, skidding to a halt as she struck back at him instinctively. Dodging the blade, he danced around her. “Hey, hey, hey.”

Artoria caught his mantle in her mailed fist and pulled him close to her, close enough that he could see how her moongold hair and eyes had darkened. Her hair was almost orange. _Ah._ She hadn’t been immediately impacted by the temporary clamp he’d put on her mana flow because she was drawing directly on her host.

“Go home,” hissed Artoria, with the first hint of emotion he’d seen from her. Then she looked beyond him and thrust him aside.

Serendipity stood in the courtyard, her face flushed and her chest heaving angrily. Merlin appreciated it in mild resignation as he contemplated the depressing options for a next step. “How dare you—”

“The little Master,” said Artoria. “You sent your Servant to fight me, so now you die.” The dark aura around her vanished as she pulled back her sword. “Excalibur—”

“Tora?” said Ritsu in a small voice as she stepped out from behind Ren.

Artoria froze, which was an unfortunate thing to do when in the middle of unleashing a devastating Noble Phantasm. It released anyhow, but twisted around Artoria like a pretzel before slamming back into her.

Artoria cried out in pain and Ritsu took an anxious step forward before being restrained by Ren’s hand. “Tora? Are you all right?”

“Now, Cú!” said Ren and her hand flashed again.

“No!” shrieked Ritsu, and once again strange power burned off her familiar. Thoughtfully, Merlin added some sparkles and then a dazzling glow. When it faded, Cú crouched protectively in front of Ren. Meanwhile, Artoria was bleeding from the chest but still alive—but her face was subtly different and her hair as orange as Ritsu’s. She stared at the younger girl with shocked eyes.

At that point, Merlin had to lift his magical thumb from the mana conduit fueling Artoria. It was that or there’d be even more of a mess to clean up, if he was any judge. The moongold hair and eyes returned, and Artoria glared around. Her gaze fell on Ritsu and her face flickered one final time.

 _“Masters_ ,” she muttered in clear annoyance, and Merlin nodded in wholehearted agreement. Then, before anybody could start something new, she turned and fled from the fortress, using her reinvigorated dark aura to achieve a speed even Cú had to envy.

“Well!” said Merlin, looking around. “That was certainly a mess.”


	10. Ren Insists

Ren stared fiercely at Merlin. He smiled, but his eyes glittered, hard and angry. She didn’t care. “Whatever happened to _Masters don’t sit on the sidelines_? _”_ she demanded.

“I was trying to protect little Miss Ritsu—” began Merlin.

But before Ren could cut him off, Ritsu wailed, “I don’t understand any of this! What happened to my sister? Why did you tell me we could stop the fight and then tell Mr. Cú to attack her?” Her foxette chittered and then used Cú as a ladder up to Ritsu’s shoulder.

“Sister…” muttered Cú, still crouched in front of Ren, his head down.

Ren blew out her breath, swallowing her desire to yell at Merlin more. She put her hand on Ritsu’s head and said, “I’m pretty sure whatever we do to the Saber spirit possessing her, your sister will be fine.”

“How can you _know_ that?” asked Ritsu, her big brown eyes fixed on Ren.

Ren hesitated, searching the field of stories in her mind, and couldn’t find an answer. “I just… do. Come on, it’ll be okay. I really think we’ll be able to save her somehow.”

Cú raised his head, his ruby eyes piercing. “Who _are_ you, my lady? How do you have such information?”

“I’m here to help,” Ren said firmly, but her confidence withered at the intensity of Cú’s stare. Doubt began to gnaw at her and her fingers curled into the pockets on her skirt. She didn’t care that much where she’d come from, or who she’d been; wondering about all that had faded against the spectacular map she’d fallen into. She had something to do, people who needed her, and she wanted so _badly_ to help. But so much of what she knew felt like… instinct. Like falling well.

“I’m me,” she said finally. “And I think what I do is going to be a lot more important than where I came from.”

“Oh yes, very true,” said Merlin amiably. “For example, here, you wasted two Command Seals and accomplished nothing more than gambling with young Miss Ritsu’s life.”

Ren’s spine stiffened. “I didn’t waste anything. The fact that Artoria Alter survived Cú’s Gáe Bolg _proved_ something.”

“And what was that?” demanded Merlin.

She stared at him, and then slowly smiled as she realized he truly didn’t know. “You said I was lucky, but Miss Ritsu here is very, _very_ lucky, don’t you think?”

Merlin blinked at Ren’s expression before his eyebrows drew together. He murmured, “The power to change fate itself….” He reached out a finger toward the _highly magical_ foxette on Ritsu’s shoulder, and then jerked it away as the little creature snapped razor-sharp teeth at him.

“I _am_ lucky sometimes _,”_ said Ritsu with a little sniffle. “And I’m so glad Mr. Cú missed. But if I was _that_ lucky, don’t you think I’d have a better familiar than this guy?”

Cú rose to his feet, favoring one leg as he scowled at the foxette. “Lucky girl summons lucky beast, shares that luck, and I miss. Of course. That’s _my_ luck.” He gave Merlin a dark look. “You didn’t help. What do you mean, I _always_ miss?”

“You’ve _never_ defeated Artoria with Gáe Bolg,” said Merlin, blithely ignoring the look of frustrated puzzlement that passed over Cú’s face. “Although I’ve never seen you miss even when backed by a Command Seal.”

He studied Ritsu for a moment longer before raising an irritated gaze to Ren again. “You guessed this fate-changing gift and then you spent a Seal to test it?” She opened her mouth to explain and he held up his hand. “No, no, I’ll accept that. You got something you wanted, I suppose. So you only wasted _one_ Seal.”

 _Never keep me from a battle._ She’d flung that mental command at him as the foxette’s light had flared around her. Ren met his lavender gaze unflinchingly. “Did I?”

Merlin moved closer to her, his hair flaring into a rainbow around him. The colored light obscured Ritsu, Cú, the shattered fortress, everything but him. Ren felt like she was drifting like a balloon: light and unrestrained and giddy. The mage leaned his head against hers and the sweet, relaxing scent of lilac and jasmine crept into her nose.

“You did,” he whispered. “Is it keeping you from a battle if you don’t know the battle is happening? If you get lost on your way there? If you’re attending to some other task? _I_ don’t think so.”

Ren blinked and shook her head as Merlin’s soft voice threaded its way into her mind. She put her hands on his chest to shove him away, but got no further than leaning into his hard chest.

“ _You_ said I couldn’t sit on the sidelines,” she muttered, staring at her hands. Then she glanced up and added fiercely, “Besides, that _was_ a mess and it would have been a lot less of one if you’d had me to coordinate what everybody else was doing. Strategy is _important._ ”

Cú’s chuckle broke through Merlin’s dreamscape and the rainbow space faded away. Ren stumbled as she realized the frowning mage hadn’t moved from where he stood before. Her fingers still remembered his warmth, though.

“Your magus doesn’t believe in other people’s strategies, my lady.” Cú once again rescued her from falling on her face, and she moved her tingling fingers to his arm. “Hey, can we try out that hair-brushing thing? I’d like to be healed by the time Artoria is.”

“Yes, of course,” said Ren quickly, pushing herself away from the Lancer. “How long do you think we have before she tries again?”

“A day. Maybe two at the outside,” said Merlin distantly. “Ritsu, would you and your foxette do some work with me while Ren attends to Cú?”

Ritsu wiped at her eyes, leaving dirty marks behind. “Will you answer more questions? Without trying to confuse me?”

Merlin hesitated, his gaze dropping to the foxette. “…As much as I can, yes.”

Suddenly nervous, Ren said, “You know you can’t trust him, Ritsu. And I need you to show me where your brushes and stuff are. I’ve never done this before.”

“They’re next to my blankets,” said Ritsu. “It’s easy work. I want to stay up here. I have to know more, Ren.”

“So do I,” muttered Ren under her breath. “Fine.” She glanced at Cú out of the corner of her eye, and then walked back into the fortress.


	11. Ren Pats A Dog

Ren found the basket of grooming tools half-hidden under one of the blankets, picked it up, and looked around. “All right, I need somewhere to sit. Come on, there was a stone table in the kitchen.” Without ever looking directly at Cú, she led the way through the underground passages back to the keep’s kitchen.

She hadn’t paid much attention to it the first time they’d been there, what with meeting Ritsu and keeping an eye on Merlin. This time, with mid-afternoon sunlight streaming through the high windows, she noticed it was significantly less dusty than the halls. The flagstone floor had been washed. Some of the remaining rusty pots sat beside the cold hearth, each of them partially scrubbed. Clearly, Ritsu hadn’t spent all her time in the fortress reading and daydreaming.

The stone table was massive, standing on two pillar legs. A set of measurements had been chiseled onto one end: both lines denoting length and scoops for volume. No bench had survived the years of neglect, and she immediately saw sitting on the table itself would still force Cú into an uncomfortable position. She frowned, looking around.

“How about here, my lady?” said Cú, pointing at a niche beside the hearth with a built-in seat, or possibly a shelf. Whichever it had been, it would serve, and so she stiffly seated herself.

Cú sat before her, stretching his injured leg out. Ren looked through the basket, minutely inspecting the two brushes, the comb, the rake, the little ribbons, and the vials.

“My lady?” asked Cú after a moment, and she startled. He tilted his head to look up at her, and then pulled out the thong keeping his hair in a tail. “I’m not going to bite you.”

“Right.” She took up the bigger brush and ran her fingers through his hair. It felt stiff against her fingers, but as she fluffed it apart, she realized it was much thicker than it looked. She wondered when it had last been unbound, and laughed as she realized what a nonsensical question that was. If the stories in her head were correct, this vessel had been created by the magic that had summoned him.

“See?” he said, in response to her laugh. “It’s not that bad. Not like some people’s hair.”

Gently, she began to brush his hair. Nothing obviously magic occurred, but after a moment, Cú’s shoulders relaxed fractionally. Slowly, she too began to relax. This really wasn’t so bad.

Eventually, still thinking about how he’d been summoned, Ren asked, “You don’t remember your other fights with Artoria, do you?”

His shoulders tightened again. “Not…exactly. I know she’s good, I know she’s dangerous, but I know… I _knew_ I should have had a good chance of beating her. Like some version of me _has_ fought her and won.”

“Chance…” murmured Ren, and shook her head.

Cú tilted his head back again, a hard light in his eyes. “Did _you_ know of my other failures against her, my lady?”

Ren shifted position uncomfortably, aware he was judging her and not sure what the right answer was. “Not until you said something. And then I remembered. Before that I knew you were… strong. Almost impossible to kill. That in some of your stories you were the last one standing when the greatest of monsters fell.”

“Ah.” His shoulders relaxed again and he lowered his head to let her return to her brushing. “I was a little worried that you’d… placed your faith in me for the wrong reasons. That would have pissed me off.”

As the bristles moved through Cú’s hair, it softened, spreading into dark waves. She moved up to work on his scalp some, wondering what the _wrong reasons_ would have been. But she couldn’t bring herself to ask.

Instead she focused on his hair, trying intermittently to will magic to flow into him. She felt nothing—and _that_ was completely untrue. She felt nothing she’d name _magic_ , but his hair was soft under her fingers and his little shifts of position brushed against her legs. She could smell his faintly bestial scent and resisted the desire to bury her nose in his hair to make sure the musk was his.

After a while, she put the brush aside and ran her hands through his hair, thinking about what to do next. Her fingers drifted down to the back of his neck and she absently scratched his skin under his collar.

A shudder ran through him as his head bent further. An intense wave of self-consciousness rushed over Ren and she pulled her hands away quickly. “Um,” she began, and then had no idea what to say.

He looked over his shoulder at her and the look in his eyes made her want to run and hide. “You stopped. Don’t stop.”

“Is… is this helping? Are you getting any mana?” she asked breathlessly.

After a tiny hesitation, he said, “Some. Not much. Not as much as I would via other means.” Turning away again, he said, “I’ll change my gear. Maybe that will help.” As he spoke, his armor flickered and vanished. Except for some arm protection, his torso was entirely bare. “That collar does itch sometimes,” he muttered. “The kind of itch you never even notice until there’s a chance it might be scratched.”

Ren’s heart was a drum in her chest as she stared at the muscled back before her. Ritsu had mentioned _petting_ as well as brushing and grooming. But she was _afraid_ of getting closer to him, of getting closer to _anybody_. And yet she wanted _so much_ —

She’d come here to help. Everything else had to be subordinate to that. The thought flashed in her mind— _she’d promised—_ and then faded, leaving only the certainty that she couldn’t let her fear ruin what she’d come to do.

“All right,” she said grimly. “Scoot forward.” When he’d done so, she dropped off the bench to kneel behind him. After tying the thong back around his hair, she tucked it over his shoulder and once again placed her fingers against his neck. Slowly, gently, she began to scratch.

She took her time, really focusing on her task and trying hard to ignore the shudders and twitches that passed through Cú’s frame, and her own reaction to those. She scratched down his spine in long swipes. She ran the pads of her fingers under his shoulder blades before scraping her nails across the same path. She dug her thumbs into knots of tension she detected near the small of his back, traced his ribs with the back of her nails, and leaned into him to rake her nails across the tops of his shoulders.

Eventually, his breathing ragged, he said, “All right, you need to stop now.”

Ren paused, flattening her palm against his back as she realized how much she’d been getting into the treatment. Desperately she tried to recall if she’d actually kissed his back or only thought about it.

Just in her head, she decided. “Did that do anything useful?”

He looked back at her again, his eyes hot, and once again he hesitated before answering. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s good.”

Ren frowned. “I think you’re lying.” Distractedly, she drew her hand lightly down his back.

The muscles moved under her fingers as he suddenly twisted to pull her around in front of him, curling his previously injured leg under her. Despite his iron grip on her upper arm, his voice was perfectly even as he said, “No. My leg will be healed soon. That’s enough for now.”

“But you used all that magic for Gáe Bolg,” Ren protested.

“We’ll talk to Caster and the kid,” said Cú. “There’s probably some tricks.”

“I could—”

“Ren! My lady.” He blew out his breath. “I don’t like being seduced.”

Ren instantly turned beet red, yanking herself away from him with such force that she sprawled backwards. “I wasn’t—I wasn’t trying to seduce you!”

“I know,” he said easily. “And that’s also why you have to stop.”

All Ren’s thoughts of how _she had to do what had to be done_ , how _she’d do what she had to in order to help people_ vanished. “Oh my god,” she wailed. She curled up into a little ball with her hands over her head, trying to bury herself and her embarrassment under the flagstones. It couldn’t possibly get any worse than this.

Then Cú rose to his feet and picked up her balled up-self, proving her wrong.

“Hey,” he said. “You’re a strange woman, my lady. Losing it like that because you’re able to inspire your warriors.”

Slowly Ren unclenched her body, until she hung limply from his hands like a rag doll, staring down at the flagstones, unable to meet his gaze. Shaking her lightly, he said, “Don’t ruin my faith in you, okay?” He set her on her feet, tipped up her chin with a firm finger, and returned the chaste kiss she’d given him earlier.

Then he stepped back. “And now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to make sure my leg doesn’t stiffen up by hunting us down some meat. Only a magus of flowers could think people could live on _fruit.”_

After one more piercing look at her, he dematerialized, leaving Ren alone in the underground kitchen.


	12. Ren Struggles With Feelings

After Cú vanished, Ren stared at where he’d been for a moment, and then let out a shaky breath. She stepped back until she bumped into the niche seat and sank into it, leaning back and closing her eyes. Cú’s scent lingered, but she tried to disregard it as she worked on re-centering herself.

Her arms and legs still ached from the workout Merlin had put her through. Possibly they’d hurt worse tomorrow. If Cú could bring back meat, that would be good. Protein was an important part of a healthy diet. Her hands especially hurt, although she hadn’t noticed when she’d been running them all over Cú’s skin.

No, thinking about Cú was no good. Every time she did, she felt unsettled: humiliated, yearning, miserable. She had to think about something else. Merlin? But remembering his floral scent left her unsettled in a different way, even less palatable. If she meant to help the people here, she had to do more than just _feel_ and _react_.

Artoria. Tora and Ritsu. They’d need a plan to defeat Artoria, preferably in such a way that they could capture the host and find out why she’d turned against the little sister who clearly still loved her. She furrowed her brow, her eyes still closed. Merlin had said she’d need somebody else, that Cú alone wouldn’t be enough to defeat Artoria. Maybe with her last Command Seal and without Ritsu’s Luck Projection… and surely Merlin was more handy in a fight than he’d implied? Once upon a time, he’d been essential to the victory for… someone.

She realized his floral scent was more than a figment of her memory and opened her eyes. He leaned in the archway of the kitchen, watching her. He smiled as she met his gaze, a smile that broadened as she sat bolt upright.

“I take it you… finished with Cú?”

Ren gave him an unfriendly look. “I did my best. He didn’t get much of a recharge. If the hair-brushing thing really is supposed to work, I think I’m doing it wrong. Aren’t you supposed to be teaching Ritsu?”

Merlin’s eyes widened fractionally in a flicker of surprise before narrowing again. “Ah yes. I’ve left her practicing some exercises.“

After waiting impatiently a moment for him to go on, Ren said, “Well? _Was_ the hair brushing method just a joke?”

“Mmm? Oh! No, no. Ritsu demonstrated it to me just by stroking her familiar’s fur. It’s definitely less effective than the traditional Magical Paths. On the other hand, it seems to be an unbroken Mystery of this world-line that magical energy can be transferred purely through affectionate contact.”

A shiver ran down Ren’s spine and she pulled her knees up to her chest. “Why don’t I have Magical Paths? Aren’t they supposed to come with this?” She waved her hand, with its marredCommand Seal pattern.

“I haven’t figured out all the irregularities in this system yet,” said Merlin lightly, and Ren cynically noted how much of a non-answer that was. But before she could call him on it, he tilted his head. “Do you feel that?”

A curl of panic wound through Ren’s stomach. Did she feel _what?_ Was she really going to be so useless here, too? She wasn’t. She couldn’t be. She tried to fight down the dread, but it only strengthened, until a bleak terror almost blotted out her vision.

“You do, I see,” said Merlin, studying her face. “Shall we go see what it is?”

She tried to answer, tried to simply process what he said, but it took so much of her mind to keep suppressed the filth that wanted to rise and consume her.

Then Merlin was bending over her, his fingers lightly under her elbow, his smile gentle. “Come on. I think you’ve defeated this before, but I bet it was exhausting. May I help?”

Miserably, Ren nodded. Merlin took her other hand in his and pulled her to her feet. Just standing up helped her feel better, and she realized that the pounding negative feeling came from outside her mind this time. She took a step forward, and another, and realized further that moving helped. The force, whatever it was, flowed and pooled, accumulating weight as it did.

“Yes,” Ren said. “Yes, what is that? An attack?” She remembered something Ritsu had told her before Artoria had attacked.

 _I heard the castles are built around the portals to stabilize them. I don’t know how it works or even if it’s true, though._ She’d sighed. _So much of what I read_ doesn’t _work._

“No, the portal,” she said, and tried to pull away from Merlin to race toward that chamber. He maintained a surprisingly firm grip on her hand, but ran with her rather than holding her back.

The negative aura didn’t exactly grow stronger as she approached the summoning room, but she could still tell that she was moving closer to the source. She stopped near the entrance as running footsteps announced Ritsu’s arrival. The younger girl collided with Merlin and then latched onto his mantle to peer around him at Ren.

“I felt this before… when I did the summoning that brought you. That I _thought_ brought you.” Ritsu scowled, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “Is something coming through?”

“Could that happen, if the surrounding castle is damaged enough?” Ren asked.

“Absolutely!” said Merlin cheerfully. He tugged on Ritsu’s ponytail. “I imagine it’s held off spitting out monsters this long due to Miss Ritsu’s luck. In fact, if you go in there, Ritsu, I bet it’ll stabilize again.”

Ren immediately realized that one of the drawbacks of Merlin holding her hand was that when she whapped him with her other hand, she ended up distractingly close to him. He caught her wrist with his free hand anyhow, and smiled down at her.

Yanking on her hands, Ren said, “That’s not a long-term solution. It may not be a solution at all. Luck isn’t exactly _predictable._ ”

“True.” Merlin kissed the back of Ren’s whapping hand and then released her with a smile. She stumbled backward, into the portal room. She caught herself awkwardly, pivoting so no matter what she couldn’t fall against the portal itself.

The blue lines of light that had traced the walls of the chamber had been damaged. Some had vanished entirely, while others flickered like bad neon. The portal itself swirled with the shades of night, occasionally giving a bubbling gloop.

“How is it?” called Merlin. “I’m afraid the foxette is very insistent Ritsu not join you, so I’ll stay out here to protect her.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be the best mage in the universe?” demanded Ren, watching the portal carefully.

“Well, yes,” said Merlin reasonably. “But I do prefer to work behind the scenes and thus I eagerly await your observations.”

Ren paced back and forth to prevent the negative aura from accumulating within her. She had no idea why that helped, but it obviously did, allowing her to focus on the portal. After a moment or so, she said, “Nothing visible is emerging. I’m wondering…” She stopped and glanced over her shoulder.

Merlin watched her as he crouched beside Ritsu with his mantle over her shoulders. The foxette stood between them and the portal room, his golden tail bushed out with every hair on end. Ritsu’s eyes were half-closed, as if she was half-asleep.

“You could just take her away from here,” Ren told him.

“And abandon my adorable but insanely rash Master? No, I don’t think so. What are you wondering?”

Ren looked back at the portal again. “Nothing’s coming through. Maybe if something _did,_ the negative energy would abate for a while? Perhaps until it recharged?” It wasn’t all she wondered, but she wasn’t ready to share her other idea, her idea about recharging Cú, with somebody so willing to laugh at her. At least, not until she’d had more time to study the process.

“I did say we’d need another Servant to defeat Artoria,” said Merlin smugly.

Instead of responding, Ren spent a few moments thinking carefully. When Merlin said, a note of concern in his voice, “Serendipity?” she only waved a hand at him quellingly.

Finally, after lining up her concerns and rearranging them into a plan, she turned back to Merlin. “You’re selling yourself short, Merlin. We don’t need another servant to defeat Artoria. But we do need one to protect Ritsu.” She stepped over the foxette and held out her uncut hand. “Sword, please.”

Merlin rose to his feet with an absent half-smile. “You saw the aftermath of Lancer and I against Artoria.”

“Sure,” Ren said, waving her upturned palm meaningfully. “Which is why next time it’ll be Lancer, Caster and me. But it can’t happen here, obviously.” She glanced down at the entranced Ritsu as Merlin pulled his sword from the staff. “And we can’t let her come with us.”

“I suppose it will depend on who answers your call.” Merlin took her hand in his, running his thumb over her palm. The sensation was a brief flash of pleasure against the negative aura pouring out of the portal. She shivered, pushing away the dark thoughts, and waited for the nick. But instead, Merlin continued to stare at her hand, his thumb moving back and forth.

“What are you doing?” Ren finally asked.

Merlin startled, his hand squeezing hers for an instant. When he glanced up at her, his lavender eyes were shadowed. But he smiled. “Just considering how to fortify your blood. Last time clearly took more than you expected.”

When Ren frowned at what seemed like an obvious lie, he released her hand to brush her mouth with his thumb. “You’re always making that face at me. One of these times I’m going to do something about it.”

Ren turned her face away, staring stonily at the wall, and he chuckled as he took her hand again. “That’s more like it.” The blade in his other hand flashed as he moved it, and then he released her. “There you go. I’ll offset the cost as much as I can.”

Moving to the darkened portal, Ren focused on what she needed in a Servant this time. Somebody who could protect Ritsu, somebody useful, somebody who wouldn’t damage her growing connection to Cú, or clash with Merlin.

Somebody easy to maintain. Somebody easy to care for without getting confused about her own goals. Was there even such a servant? It seemed like a tall order. How could somebody like herself even hope?

She dripped her blood into the portal, once again feeling the drain on her deeper self, along with the pooling negative aura. The deep blue light thickened around her. As the final drop of blood splashed into the portal, it didn’t flash so much as clump together into a shimmering dark form.

Dizzily, Ren frowned. This Servant seemed... small. Smaller than her.

The Servant stepped forward and said, in an uncertain voice, “Mommy?”


	13. Ren Gets What She Asks For

As the night-blue light poured into the small figure shrouded in black, Ren’s heart climbed into her throat. She knew _exactly_ who she’d summoned this time, and—

—and she _definitely_ wasn’t ready.

She’d summoned everything she’d specified in her silent prayer, though. Of course, she’d forgotten to specify _heroic._ She hadn’t even considered specifying _not a serial killer_.

The summoning energy faded away and the portal once again returned to its sedate swirling blue, although the missing strands of energy supporting the chamber didn’t regenerate. A child shrouded in a shredded man’s black jacket, decked out with a profusion of knifes, with mist-pale hair and huge green eyes looked around in clear confusion.

 _Then again, what chance had the child ever had to_ be _heroic?_ The angry thought rose from the black depths of her mind. When the little Servant again said, “Mommy? Where are you?” she opened her arms.

“I’m here. You’re Jack, and I’m Serendipity and,” she swallowed against a dry throat. “I’ll be your Mommy now.”

Those green eyes studied her with a good deal more shrewdness than Ren expected. Then they softened and the child said, “Okay.” Lilac light flared briefly around them as Jack stepped forward. “What do you want us to do, Mommy?”

Ren glanced over her shoulder, realizing as she did so that Merlin must have done _something_ because she wasn’t nearly as close to collapsing from exhaustion this time. Merlin, his eyes sparkling, gave her a double thumbs-up before scooping up the dazed Ritsu and bringing her into the room to tuck her into her blankets, the golden foxette following behind.

Ren returned her attention to Jack. “For now, I want you to get comfortable here. Uh, would you like some berries?”

Jack’s brow furrowed. “Why?”

Picking up the mostly-empty basket, Ren said, “They taste good. And then… and then I need to brush your hair.” Because it would be better, Ren decided, to introduce the wraithborn Servant to a source of magic nutrition _other_ than human innards as soon as possible.

“Oh,” said Jack. “Okay.”

Ren gave her the basket and told her, “I’ll be right back.” She darted down the hall to the kitchen, snatched up the grooming basket and raced back again. But she wasn’t fast enough to stop Merlin from causing trouble. When she arrived, Jack was huddled protectively over the basket while the magus knelt near her.

“No,” said Jack, holding the basket close to her thin chest. “You’re the worst. You’ll make everything awful. You smell bad too. Go away.”

“Merlin!” said Ren sharply. She’d hoped for somebody who wouldn’t clash with the magus, but possibly there wasn’t a Servant born who could stand strong against his terrible personality.

The look of exaggerated dismay Merlin turned on her was almost ludicrous. “I only asked her if she knew who I was already! Truly, honestly!”

“He’s like the men who took our Mommy away from us,” accused Jack. “Who made it so our Mommy had to throw us away.”

Merlin’s face froze and then went completely expressionless. For a moment it was like somebody else looked out from his eyes. Ren blinked and the moment vanished as Merlin put his hand behind his head and laughed. “Eheheh, I suppose you’re right. I _am_ _like_ them… but Jack…” His laugh vanished as he said gently, “I’m not them. And I won’t let those men take _this_ Mommy away.”

Unmollified, Jack said, “Neither will I. Mommy, what’s that?”

“Try the berries,” said Ren. “I’m going to use this to brush your hair. That should… taste good in a different way than the berries?” She rolled her eyes desperately toward Merlin, aware of the inadequacy of her explanation.

“ _Feel_ good, Ren,” corrected Merlin. “I expect it will feel like a connection is forming from her to you, although since I’m still waiting for my turn under the brush I don’t _really_ know.”

Jack picked up one of the blueberries, rolled it between her fingers, and then squashed it. “Heheh, fun!” Then she licked the juice off her fingers and her eyes widened. She repeated the experiment with a plump red berry.

Ren moved behind her and started gently combing through Jack’s hair, relieved to see that parasites and filth hadn’t been included at the factory. Jack continued to crush berries and lick her hands, without paying much attention to what was happening with her hair, so Ren said, “You straight up said you didn’t need me to recharge you.”

“Well, no,” said Merlin. “I don’t need your piddling recharge, but have you _seen_ my hair?” He picked up a long hank, letting it spill over his palm like a waterfall. “The whole point of hair like this is to lure pretty girls into playing with it.”

“And does that ever work?” Ren inquired sweetly.

Merlin opened his mouth to respond but his gaze fell on Jack and he closed it again. After a moment, instead of answering Ren, he said, “Hey, Jack, try crushing them with your teeth instead of your fingers.”

Jack gave him a startled, wary look, and then put one of the tiny red berries in her mouth. “Ooh! That’s a good pop.”

Merlin nodded. “Just like—well, we don’t want to make Mommy sick to her stomach.”

Before Ren could think about that too hard, Ritsu, sitting up among her blankets, said blearily, “What happened? Did you…” Her brow furrowed. “Who is that?”

“I protected you from the negative aura, Miss Ritsu,” said Merlin cheerfully. “This is Jack, the newest member of our little team.”

Jack looked at Ritsu with flat, expressionless eyes, while Ritsu bit her lip. Ren said, “I summoned her too. Jack, your primary job—other than letting me brush your hair—will be to keep Ritsu safe, all right?”

“Is she… “ Ritsu caught and corrected herself. “Are you a child? Or just very small? Is that rude to ask?”

Jack reached up to catch Ren’s hand, holding it with a painfully strong grip. “We’re Mommy’s.”

Rather than being confused by this as Ren expected, Ritsu smiled as if everything made sense. “Yes, of course.” She scrambled to her feet and gave a ceremonial bow. “I look forward to sharing sweets with you!”

Merlin said, “Hey, hey, why didn’t we get the pretty bow?”

Ritsu gave him a scornful look. “Because you’re adults.” She gave Jack an inquiring, expectant look.

“Mommy?” Jack looked up at Ren with that nearly expressionless face. Only the slant of her eyebrows indicated her confusion.

Ren squeezed Jack’s hand. “I think she wants to be friends.”

“Yes,” said Ritsu patiently. “That’s what I said.”

“Oh,” said Jack. She considered the other girl for a long moment. “Does that mean you’ll play with us?”

Ritsu nodded. “I know a lot of games.”

“Okay.” Jack’s hand loosened on Ren’s. “We’d like that.”


	14. Cú Brings Home Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief interlude of home-making.

“Yo, Caster, give me a hand up here!” called Cú from the ground floor above. Jack, who had been listening to Ritsu ramble about the orphans she’d adopted from neighboring regions while Ren brushed her hair, once again tensed up, moving between Ren and the exit.

“That’s Cú Chulainn,” said Ren reassuringly. “He’s also part of our team. He went to hunt down some meat.”

Merlin, who had been listening to Ritsu talk about her ordinary life with the same rapt attention as Jack, slipped his mantle and jacket off once more, leaving them hanging on his freestanding staff. As he moved to the exit, he cocked his head and said, “He’s already put some of his kill in the kitchen. Maybe Jack could…” he trailed off, studying the girl. “On second thought, best wait until there’s a bath available before having her ply her skills.” He turned to look out the door, and grinning, said, “What’s that? Were you calling me, Lancer? Eheheh, I was sleeping!”

As Merlin vanished down the hall, Jack, Ritsu and Ren all exchanged looks. “ _Why_ is he such a liar, Ren?” pleaded Ritsu.

Ren, who had been thinking about this off and on since meeting Merlin that dawn, said, “I think it’s because otherwise we might rely on him too much.” She remembered when he’d woken her from her nap. “Although maybe he just really enjoys pissing people off that much. Let’s go see what’s in the kitchen.”

Four rabbits, field-dressed but unskinned, had been laid in a row on the stone table, along with two medium-sized ground birds. Jack and Ritsu both lit up at the sight of the game. Ren, although hungry again, had less enthusiasm. Her general store of knowledge expected meat to come in packages, not still wrapped in its own feathers and skin. “Um, do you two know how to handle game?”

“I can cut it up,” suggested Jack. She pulled out two of her butcher’s knives.

Ritsu shook her head. “We have to get the skin and feathers off first. But where’s Mr. Cú?”

“Ah, I’ll go find them,” said Ren. “Ritsu, you’re in charge of the meat.”

“Mommy?” Jack looked worried.

Ren said, “I promise I’ll scream if something bad happens, and then you can come and gut whoever did it.” At Jack’s single nod, Ren ducked out of the room and headed up to the ground floor.

To her shock, the courtyard, previously containing only rubble, now had… stuff: some furniture, some barrels, a couple of chests and small sacks. There was a distinct lack of Cú and Merlin, although Ren could smell Merlin’s telltale flower scent everywhere.

She wandered a moment between the objects, opening one barrel to find it a quarter full of withered apples, while another had grain of some sort. A small chest contained a selection of vials containing powders.

“What do you think, my lady?” asked Cú from behind her, and she startled wildly, flinging three vials in the air as she lost her grip on the box.

Cú caught the three vials effortlessly, while the box landed in the crook of Merlin’s arm. Ren put her hand to her chest and tried to calm her racing heart. “Where did all this stuff come from?”

“The burned houses in the village. The fires were started externally, so a lot of stuff inside was in good shape,” said Cú easily. “Nobody’s living there anymore. Everything stank of smoke but I thought the flower mage could probably do something about that.” He raised his eyebrows at her expression. “Night soon falls and I didn’t like the thought of you huddled on the floor with only a thin blanket.”

“I would have happily kept her warm if you—” began Merlin, and, as Cú _looked_ at him, then hastily said, “Well, it doesn’t matter now that she’s summoned that terrifying child spirit.”

Cú moved past Ren, handing her the spice vials before hefting up a rocking chair. “Yes, I sensed that you’d decided to summon another Servant after all.” His voice was absolutely neutral.

“The portal was acting strange so I wanted to burn off the extra energy,” said Ren, watching him anxiously. “I think Jack has very different strengths than you.”

“That’s good,” said Cú, but there was something dark in the look he gave her as he strode past her into the fortress.

Ren stared after him worriedly until Merlin plucked the spice vials from her hands and replaced them in the small chest. Softly, he said, “You’re very attached to him already.”

“I’ve always liked him,” Ren said in a small voice. “I want him to like me too.”

“Like you? Or respect you?”

Ren frowned at the question and Merlin patted her on the head before hefting up one of the barrels. As he strode into the keep, Ritsu and Jack burst past him.

Ritsu looked around, chewing on her lip. “I know some of this stuff.” Merlin paused, turning and raising an eyebrow, clearly just as interested as Ren in how Ritsu would take the theft from her village, although probably only so he could laugh later.

But slowly Ritsu’s expression hardened. “For all I know some of it might have come from the Castle originally. _Somebody_ certainly took all the stuff that a keep is supposed to have. And the villagers aren’t helping any other way. Maybe this way my orphans can come live here too.”

“Don’t put the cart before the horse, little miss,” said Cú, remateralizing next to the last of the big sacks. “We need to deal with that Saber possessing your sister before we do anything else.”

“Oh, Serendipity has a plan,” said Merlin, with malicious glee. “We three will take her down while the children stay here. Ren tells me having her there from the start will make all the difference.”

Cú gave Ren that determinedly neutral look again, and inwardly Ren quailed. She could tell that he didn’t trust her, and _that_ , she realized, was what she really wanted. She’d wanted a plan that wouldn’t leave Cú feeling betrayed, and—

_I was a little worried that you’d… placed your faith in me for the wrong reasons. That would have pissed me off._

Ren slowly let out her breath as she remembered Cú saying that as she’d brushed his hair. She hadn’t understood it then, but now a bit of his meaning glimmered at her. Ren stood up. She needed time to think.

“Let’s get everything inside and figure out how to make a meal. We can discuss my plan after we’ve all eaten.”

“Sure,” said Cú, and picked up a chair Ritsu had seated herself in with one hand. Ritsu squealed and held on tightly. Ren looked around and found a smaller sack of onions, while Jack lifted a barrel larger than she was over her head.

Once everything from the courtyard had been moved into the keep—mostly into the kitchen or the drafty great hall above—there was some confusion over who actually knew how to cook the rabbit that had already been skinned and sectioned by Jack under Ritsu’s supervision.

Cú suggested the ‘meat on a stick’ approach. Merlin suggested they might as well, since he could make anything taste like anything. Meanwhile, Ren wanted to prepare something more substantial—and delicious—for herself and the girls. But while she felt confident she could make a stew, she wasn’t too thrilled at cooking on an open hearth using half-rusted iron pots, and Cú hadn’t acquired much in the way of eating utensils.

Ritsu nudged a big rusted cast iron frying pan with her boot. “If I had actually finished cleaning any of these, I could at least make pancakes.” She gave her guests a guilty look. “That’s the only thing I really know how to cook.”

Decisively, Ren said, “That’ll be a start. We can have savory pancakes and then I can panfry the rabbit and we can wrap the meat in the pancakes.”

“But the pan will take hours to clean,” protested Ritsu.

Ren glanced at Merlin and Cú. “Must it?”

Merlin smiled in a distant wise-man way and said, “I think that’s more the Child of Light’s department than mine.”

Cú wrinkled his nose. “Yeah, I can clean them up.” He crouched down at the big hearth, scratching something into the stone with a knife. “All right, pile in all the rusted pots and then stand back.” Once that had been done, he drew an angular shape in the air, and the hearth burst into flame.

Even standing back, the rush of heat felt like it crisped Ren’s eyebrows. But when the flames died away a few moments later, everything in the hearth was fine white ash except the iron pots and pans.

“Let ‘em cool a while,” said Cú. “Then wipe the ash off and rub the rabbit fat all over them, or at least the one you’re using tonight. Don’t get the others wet before you can coat them with oil.” He shrugged as the girls all looked at him wide-eyed. “Rusty metal is rusty metal. Do you want me to do anything else?”

Breathlessly, Ritsu said, “Firewood?”

As Cú nodded and left, Jack said, “I can chop more things.” She pointed at Merlin. “What’s _he_ going to do?”

Merlin beamed. “I’m going to stay right here under the young lady’s eye. Unless she’d rather I wander off and entertain myself?”

Ren gritted her teeth, because she actually had been _planning_ on demanding he stay in the kitchen where she could keep an eye on him. But perhaps he was right. Cooking, keeping an eye on Jack, and figuring out her plan would take up enough of her attention; having Merlin lounging in the corner grinning at her would only make it worse.

“How about you wander off and do something _useful_ instead?”

“Of course. Maybe I’ll study the magic in the portal room,” he said, executing a bow, and departed.

“Good riddance,” muttered Jack, and found the bag of onions.


	15. Ren Has A Plan

Since they didn’t yet have enough chairs, they all sat on the kitchen floor to eat.

“Pretty good cooking, my lady,” said Cú, leaning back against the table leg as he finished his fourth rabbit pancake. Jack had already eaten six, while Ritsu worked on her third, feeding bits of pancake to her foxette. Ren had limited herself to two, confident that everybody there except Merlin needed the energy more.

Merlin himself had also taken only two, but he’d had a small bite of one and then stopped, leaning his chin on one hand as he watched everybody else enjoy their food. When at last every other pancake and piece of rabbit had been devoured, Cú cast his gaze over Merlin’s uneaten portion. “Are you just going to waste that?”

“Hmm? Oh, this? I’m afraid Miss Ritsu’s pancakes just don’t appeal to me. But you all liked them quite a bit, and that was nice. Everybody’s satisfied now… well, except for Ren.” Merlin cupped his hand to his ear. “I’m pretty sure her stomach’s still growling.”

Ren jumped and looked around guiltily. Her stomach _wasn’t_ growling at all, but she wasn’t exactly full, either. “I’m fine.”

Cú gave her a narrow look. _Don’t be stupid_ , his gaze seemed to say, and Ren flushed. “Look, if Merlin doesn’t want his, I’ll totally eat them. But I’m fine no matter what.”

“Let’s hear your plan first,” said Merlin. “I bet you’ll enjoy them more after you've gotten that off your chest.”

Ren hesitated and then squared her shoulders. “I’d like Cú and Ritsu to defend the fortress. If the enemy manages to seal the portal, we lose, so we can’t let that happen. Meanwhile, Jack, Merlin and I will bring down Artoria.” She allowed herself only the briefest look at Cú’s expression, and couldn’t determine his reaction at all.

But it didn’t matter. She’d made her decision. If they could win, she’d have opportunities to field him properly later. She just hoped—

“How are we going to do that?” asked Merlin, and Ren forced herself to focus.

“Top level overview: I’ll distract her while you disable her magic and Jack delivers a killing blow.”

“Distract her,” said Merlin flatly. “How?”

Ren scowled. “I’m going to walk into their camp and talk to her.”

After staring at her for a moment, Merlin said, “Hey, Lancer, I don’t think our lady wants these pancakes after all. Do you?”

“Ah…” said Cú, sounding conflicted. “I wanna say yes, but it’s _you_ offering, you know? Besides, she clearly needs more food if she’s coming up with a plan like that.”

“You haven’t even heard the details yet,” said Ren sharply.

“What details are going to sell me on you just surrendering to your enemy?” asked the magus sweetly.

“Hey, you’re the one who started teaching me to _defend myself_ by telling me to attack you.”

“Yes, because you were _terrible_ at it,” Merlin said patiently.

Cú sighed. “What are these details, my lady?”

Ren looked around at everybody. Jack had her arms clasped around her knees, watching her with those intense green eyes, while Ritsu held her foxette to her chest like it was her baby. Merlin still lounged on one side, while Cú had straightened from his comfortable position against the table leg.

Ren held up her hand with the Command Seals. While she’d used two earlier in the day, she still had the remnants of them, as well as the third one. “Tora’s supposed to capture Summoners, not kill them. I’m pretty sure she’ll talk to me if I show up alone.”

“Did she seem particularly chatty before when she almost Excalibur Morgan’d you?” asked Merlin.

“Yes, actually,” said Ren, and Merlin’s brow furrowed. “She told me exactly what she was going to do and why. I didn’t even have to ask. In her own territory, with me at her mercy? She’ll absolutely respond if I want to talk. If nothing else, she’ll want to know why I’m there.”

“She’ll be ready for the obvious trap,” pointed out Cú, but thoughtfully.

Ren nodded. “That’s why we have one. After she’s focused on me, Merlin goes for that mirror you mentioned. It must be important, right? She probably won’t want him to have it. So I distract her, Merlin goes for the mirror while she’s focused on me, but he fumbles it. She gets distracted by Merlin, but I’m _still_ a distraction. When her attention is split between us… Jack strikes. Even if she anticipates that, she’ll be expecting Cú, not an Assassin with Presence Concealment.”

Merlin and Cú were both quiet a moment. Then, his gaze faraway, Merlin held out one of the two pancake rolls to her. She accepted it, quite pleased. “Not as terrible a plan as you thought?”

“No, it’s awful,” said Merlin distantly. “But given what you have to work with, it’s… definitely at least a plan.” His gaze snapped back to her as she stuck her tongue out at him, and something glinted in his lavender eyes.

“It’s dishonorable,” said Cú, but without rancor. “But sometimes that’s what it takes.”

“What will happen to Tora?” demanded Ritsu abruptly. “You’re sure she’ll be all right?”

Slowly Ren shook her head. “I think so, but I don’t know what will happen after we defeat her Servant form.”

Merlin said gently, “But Ritsu, I _can_ promise that Tora _won’t_ be all right if she’s never defeated. You know that, I think. You spoke yourself of defeating her, did you not?”

Ritsu’s voice was small. “Yeah. I just thought it’d be… different, somehow.”

“You and me, little miss,” said Cú, and Ren knew that although he accepted her plan, he still craved a more successful rematch with the Saber.

“Jack, what do you think?” asked Merlin.

Jack’s thin shoulders moved. “Mommy’s plan is Mommy’s plan.”

Her answer apparently dissatisfied Merlin, because he frowned as his gaze went far away again.

Then Jack added, “Tonight?”

Merlin shook his head firmly. “No. Showing up in the dark would instantly put her on the defensive.”

“I’m better at killing people in the dark,” Jack warned.

“Yes, but Seren—Mommy’s a lot more likely to die before you get the chance, child.” Merlin finally looked at Ren again. “You could try one more summon first. I can enable that much.”

Ren had already considered that. “I’m not ready, and I don’t think a new Servant would be ready either, not in the timeframe we have. I was thinking… dawn? Before Artoria has fully regenerated.”

Merlin passed the other pancake roll to Ren and then rolled onto his back. “This plan… It might work against some other Heroic Spirit. But against Artoria… especially in this form… I don’t think you should count on mercy.”

Ren chewed and swallowed a bite of the pancake roll and rose to her feet. She moved so she looked down at Merlin. His eyes had closed, his long lashes resting on his cheeks. A pang of compassion shot through her. “Is it hard for you to work against her?”

His eyes flew open, an odd expression making his mouth twist. “I? Not at all. In any case, that’s hardly the sweet girl I trained.”

Ren’s eyes narrowed. “Because I could also swap you and Cú.”

“No,” said Merlin decisively, sitting up. “That _would_ lead to your death. At least I have a chance of getting you out alive.” He sprang to his feet and added in response to Cú’s chuckle, “You’re amused, Hound?”

“I never heard the Magus of Flowers was such a stick in the mud,” teased Cú.

Merlin grinned wryly. “Definitely Serendipity’s fault.” Before Ren could demand an explanation, the magus clapped his hands. “My one requirement is that you go to bed _now_ , young lady. Sleep is not optional for Masters in your position. And remember, I’ll know if you’re faking.”

Ren blinked at him. “Now?”

“Now. You saw the bed upstairs. It’s yours. I’ll be along in a few minutes to make sure you haven’t run off.”

Ren, unclear how her great planning had ended up with her being sent to bed immediately after dinner, nonetheless did as she was bid. When Merlin arrived, she was seated on the wooden bed, bouncing experimentally. The mattress was blackened in places, but the straw within seemed clean and it smelled sweet and fresh, just like the assorted blankets. “Better than the floor,” she said. “I’ll have to thank Cú.”

“Eheheh, I’m sure he’ll appreciate that.”

Narrowing her eyes, remembering fragments of story about Merlin’s origins, Ren said, “You’re not going to do anything perverted to me while I’m asleep, are you?”

He laughed, his eyes crinkling. “Not while you’re _asleep_ , no. Where would be the fun in that? And I’ll make sure nobody else does anything either.”

Ren thought about that. “Do I need to define _perverted_ for you, just to be sure?”

Crouching down so he was at her eye-level, Merlin said, “You could. It might get embarrassing, revealing all the things you’ve thought of but definitely _don’t_ want me to do.” He paused, watching with interest as she blushed. “Or you could simply trust that I really, truly want to both keep you alive and remain near you. Disturbing your sleep would be pleasant but,” he sighed, “short-sighted.”

Ren couldn’t seem to stop blushing, which provided incentive for her to stretch out and pull the blankets up to her chin. “All right,” she said… or squeaked, really, before rolling over to face the giant hearth instead of the mage. Sooner than she imagined possible, her eyes began drifting closed, and soon she was deeply asleep.

Merlin leaned against a wall, watching her relax into slumber. He felt Cú, dematerialized, drift past and begin a patrol of the broken ramparts. Jack came by without her knives and, ignoring him, went around the bed to peer into Serendipity’s face.She knelt there for a long moment before once again leaving on business of her own. A little bit later, Merlin felt Ritsu slip into dreams in her nest in the portal room.

Sighing, Merlin leaned his head back against the wall. “Oh, Cath Palug,” he murmured. “So long in that tower and I haven’t learned a thing.” Then he began to carefully and invisibly explore the dreams of the strange girl he’d named Serendipity. 


	16. Ren Goes For A Hike

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double-length!

“Mommy, time to wake up.” A small hand shook Ren’s shoulder and she opened her eyes to pre-dawn dimness. For a moment she stared blankly at the little girl in front of her, wondering who she was. She’d been so deeply asleep and then she fell—

Memories of the previous day came rushing back, vivid against the emptiness where her prior life should have been. She’d come here intending to help. She’d summoned Servants, special familiar entities called Heroic Spirits, and they were a lot more troublesome than she’d expected.

“Jack,” she said softly, and the girl’s face lit up.

Oh yes, and today she was going to throw herself at death without any survival skill other than the ability to fall well. Why had she thought this was a good idea? She no more wanted to die now than she had falling from the sky a day earlier.

“The Lancer and the Caster are cooking you birds on a stick,” Jack informed her, scrambling up on the bed beside her. “After that we have to go for a walk. Ritsu’s still asleep.”

Right. Ren wanted to help Ritsu, and this was the best plan she’d been able to invent. At least if she failed she wouldn’t be making anything _worse_ for Ritsu or her world, right? That was a bright thought.

Ren was starting to suspect she wasn’t a morning person. She mumbled, “I wonder if there’s any tea left.”

Jack’s eyebrows drew together. “The Caster made a cup a little while ago and then didn’t bother drinking it.”

“Oh good,” Ren said, and dragged herself to her feet, assisted by Jack’s Servant-sized strength.She ached all over and felt so hungry that _hollow_ was a better term. By the time she made it to the kitchen, the smell of sizzling fowl powered her just as much as the thought of tea.

“Aww,” said Merlin, far too chipper. “Somebody else woke you up first. Here, sit, drink and eat. You’ve got some hiking to do and we can’t help you.”

“Wha…?” Ren managed, before burying her nose in the fragrant steam coming off the tea.

Patiently, Merlin said, “If you look like a Servant just dropped you off at the camp gates, it’s going to raise suspicions. Given how hapless you were in the forest yesterday, I figured you’d need the breakfast.”

Cú set a small pan in front of her containing sizzling bird parts skewered by a sharpened stick. Ren stared at it faintly. “Aren’t there any more berries? Maybe with some… milk? Yogurt? Pancakes? This isn’t breakfast…”

“Aren’t we the picky one this morning,” said Cú, and ruthlessly pushed the bird parts off the stick. “Eat.”

Ren glanced around, meeting Merlin’s friendly lavender eyes, Jack’s concerned green eyes and finally Cu’s mocking ruby gaze. She had this vague feeling that she was supposed to be the one in charge, and yet somehow she’d been sent to bed early and was now being forced to eat barbecue for breakfast.

Probably some sort of revenge, she decided. Maybe she even deserved it. How would she know? Her personal memory went back one day, and she was far too sleepy to think about it reasonably.

So she ate her barbecued fowl and drank her tea and then the Servants took her to the wall Artoria had shattered and showed her the path of fallen trees that cut through the forest.

“Just turn right when you reach the end of that path,” said Merlin. “Keep walking and, well, you’ll probably be captured pretty soon. Once you get Artoria talking, I’ll make my move. Good luck!” He grabbed Jack by her coat and they both vanished. Only Cú remained corporeal, watching her.

“I’ll try to send you somebody to play with,” she told him, and then made herself march away.

The ‘path’ was even slower going than the unmarred forest had been, but eventually, with new scratches and abrasions, covered in sweat and immensely grumpy at everything, Ren made it to the beginning of the Excalibur Morgan strike and turned right, into what looked like pristine forest.

But she hadn’t walked five minutes before a rough voice said, “And what do we have here?”

Ren had been so lost in the momentary irritations that she’d mostly forgotten her reason for hiking that morning. It was certainly better than fretting, but now that irritation caused her to display the back of her hand to the voice, along with her middle finger. “I’m here to talk to your boss, not you.”

“‘Ey, it’s the summoner,” said another voice.

“Nah, that’s another one,” said a third voice. “The one the captain’s after is a wee thing.”

“Oy! Quiet! How do we know you’re not associated with that blue bastard who caused so much trouble yesterday.”

Ren tried to smile, but only ended up baring her teeth. “Oh, I am. That’s what I want to talk about. Y’see, he did that without my permission, so I, uh,got rid of him. And I wanted to talk to your boss before I summoned somebody else.”

The silence abruptly became whispering. Then the lead voice said, “Yeah, this is too weird. You want to talk to the Captain? You’ll get your chance. Search her and then bind her hands.” Two ruffians, dressed in armor scraps, appeared from the underbrush and approached her with shortswords drawn.

“If you bind my hands, you’ll have to carry me,” warned Ren. “I’m not good at hiking.”

“Hah,” said the leader, still in the brush. “Search her _thoroughly_.”

And search her the two men did, running their stinking hands all over her. She tried to be patient, but when that only earned her more stomach-churningly invasive contact she said, “That’s enough. Stop. Or I’ll return the favor once I’ve resummoned my companion.”

“Hah,” said the culprit, dropping his hands. “That’s bloody Summoner arrogance for you. She’s clean, Sarge, an’ I’d guess she doesn’t have any lurking nasties near. Certainly not that blue fellow.”

The other ruffian, scruffy, wiry, filthy and bald said, “We could just kill her here. Say she attacked us. One less Summoner to have to put down later.”

Ren’s heart, already beating hard, leapt into her throat. But if things went south this early, that was good in a way. As long as Jack and Merlin were near, they could rescue her from a few mundane humans easily.

She really hoped they were near.

“You’ve got the most amazing deathwish, you ass,” said the leader. “If we hadn’t lost those men yesterday I’d let you try it just so we’s can see what trick she’s plotting. But as it is, the Captain’s Dragon-Saber put me in charge of wiping your ass, so let’s get a move on. I’ve sent that damn lizard back to warn the Captain we’re coming. She can deal with this.”

With the three ruffians behind her, Ren once again started pushing her way through the forest. It must have been another ten minutes before she abruptly broke into a large man-made clearing that connected to a rough road leading to the far side of the forest.

The camp in the clearing still bore many signs of Cú Chulainn’s extracurricular activities the day before, in the form of a couple of collapsed tents and scattered firepits. In the distance down the rough road was a small pile of bodies and a group of men wielding shovels. The whole camp stank of blood, unwashed bodies and all that came with them.

The central tent was better maintained, although it too had a splash of blood upon it. As Ren turned toward it, the flap lifted and Artoria Alter stepped out.

She carried her sword unsheathed in one hand, while her blackened armor seemed to swallow up the dawn’s light. Although Merlin had assured them it would take her a day to fully regenerate from her injuries, she stalked forward as if perfectly healed.

“Uh, can the Captain come out?” asked one of the men behind Ren. “We have a prisoner.”

Artoria’s golden eyes narrowed. “Didn’t you ask that last night?”

“Not me, sir! That was him!”

“Hmm,” said Artoria, and then simply dismissed the man from her attention as she focused on Ren.

Ren crossed her arms, trying to appear casual and confident.“Hey, Your Majesty. I wanted to talk to you.”

“Did you,” said Artoria flatly, leveling her sword at Ren’s throat.

Ren promptly held up her hands, her mouth dry. “I’m unarmed. My Lancer isn’t here. I wanted to ask you some questions about… about your faction. Maybe I should be on your side.”

The sword inched closer. “I’m not fond of traitors.”

“Does that matter?” Ren turned one hand around to show her Command Seals. “I’m a Summoner and your Summoner is supposed to capture other Summoners, right? If I make that happen, she wins, no more resources lost.”

Artoria bared her teeth. “In theory. But I was wrong yesterday when I called you a little Master.”

Ren blinked. “Uh, what?”

“Merlin made a mistake letting you approach so close to me. Overconfidence always was his besetting sin.”

A dread very distinct from her fear of the sword crept down Ren’s spine, a dread that had surfaced again and again since she’d first recognized Merlin. She tried to speak, to join in the Merlin-trashing, but fear made her tongue thick and clumsy.

“ _You are no Master_ , girl. You’re nothing but an illusion created by Merlin.” The tip of the black sword moved from pointing at Ren’s throat down her torso. “If I cut off this pretty dress, there’d hardly be anything left of you. You might even fade away entirely.”

“You’re wrong,” said Ren, but weakly. She _had_ to deny it, even though she knew Artoria Alter would never stoop to _lying_. The blackened Servant was a creature of brute force, not deception.

“Am I?” A cold smile curved Artoria’s lips. “Trust me to recognize a fellow piece in one of Merlin’s games, child.”

“But I’ve summoned Servants,” Ren whispered, her vision darkening at the edges. Everything was going wrong as everything Artoria said seemed so right. “I’ve Commanded them.”

“And yet without Merlin, you’d be nothing. Far better you learn that now rather than later. You yet have so little to lose.”

One of the soldiers said, “Captain—Saber—Sir! There’s a man in your tent; we can’t get near him.”

Artoria lowered her sword and grabbed Ren’s hair in her mailed fist in the same smooth movement, shoving Ren to her knees and dragging her as she turned toward her tent. Merlin stood within, his fingers resting lightly on a facedown mirror on a small table as he gazed at Artoria.

Ren cried out, pushing her hands helplessly against Artoria’s arm. She might not be real, but the pain that radiated through her head still hurt like hell.

 _Mommy?_ Jack whispered in Ren’s mind. _She’s hurting you. What should I do?_

But Ren couldn’t answer. All she could see was Merlin and how every bit of his attention was on Artoria. It was like Ren didn’t exist. Her head whirled as she tried to find something to validate herself against.

“You were always cruel, but you’ve gotten sloppy, mage. Sending this girl to fight me,” Artoria shook Ren by the hair and Ren squealed helplessly.

“You were a good child, Artoria,” said Merlin mildly. “I’ve come to regret that.”

“So I see. And thus this one isn’t even _that_. A shadow, a figment stolen from a dream.” And Merlin only stood there without denying it, his fingers on the mirror and a contemplative expression on his face. Ren’s heart twisted.

Artoria went on. “I’m going to save her from you, though. Better she return to a wisp than realize too late how meaningless her life is.” She lifted Ren by her hair and bent slightly to say, “You don’t believe me. That’s fine. Invoke your last Command Seal. Reject Merlin. One way or another, it will free you.”

Even then, Merlin didn’t look at Ren, his gaze instead going distant. Even a single glance would have reassured Ren, but either he couldn’t bear to look at her or she truly didn’t matter.

 _Mommy?_ Jack’s shrill mental voice sounded distant. Maybe all of this was a dream. A dream of a dream and if she did what Artoria said, she’d wake up. But…

“Why?” Ren croaked. Her head ached so much.

Artoria’s laugh was rusty. “Who knows? He’s always liked sending little girls to fight dragons. Maybe he thought seals would make you easier to control than a sword. But fate put me in his path once again.”

Merlin’s gaze focused back on Artoria. “Because centuries in a tower weren’t enough.”

Ren lowered her eyes as tears filled them. No wonder she had no memories. She was just a side character in somebody else’s story, with just enough of an identity to move the story along. It all made so much sense.

Abruptly Artoria shoved Ren to the ground and whirled, her sword clashing against twin knives as Jack dropped her Presence Concealment and attacked.

After that single shattering sound, Artoria’s mail boot moved to Ren’s throat and a quick pattering sound circled them. Ren’s cheek pressed into the damp ground, grit getting into her eye, but she saw Jack’s pink shoes flash past.

“Ah,” said Artoria, and shifted to a two-handed grip on her sword.

Ren couldn’t help herself. She struggled, flinging out her hand with the Command Seal. Even if she was just a side character, she’d _come to help somebody though_ and it damn well wasn’t Merlin. She’d never trusted him. If she was one of his illusions, he’d done a _terrible job._

And Artoria Alter thought Ren had come to the camp as Merlin’s pawn.

“Mmf,” Ren mumbled into the dirt.

Artoria Alter’s boot lifted off her neck as she pivoted slowly. “Ready to be saved, girl in a pretty dress?”

Ren rolled away and pushed herself to her knees. She spat out dirt and said, “Merlin’s a shit mage.” Artoria’s head inclined towards hers, although her gaze remained on Jack. “He’s a liar and a trickster. _And I didn’t come here for him.”_ She glared at Artoria. “I came here to help Ritsu. I came here for _Tora.”_ She held up her hand and shouted, “Cú!”

The final Command Seal flashed, and a mighty shattering sound echoed through the camp as Merlin brought his staff down on the hand mirror. Artoria whirled in a blur, her sword at the ready.

Cú Chulainn stood in the air around ten feet above the camp, holding Ritsu under one arm rather than Gáe Bolg. The foxette stood on his shoulder. Cú waved his free hand. “Whassap?”

The moment of realization crossed Artoria’s face _after_ Jack’s daggers slammed into her, first one pair and then another. Ritsu shrieked and covered her eyes.

Artoria froze, and then her blackened holy sword vanished from her hand. She looked down at Ren, still on her knees.“But you’re nothing…”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t help others,” Ren told her.

Artoria frowned, and then her armor, her face, and Jack’s daggers disappeared from Tora’s collapsing form.

A moment of breathless silence ended when the armed rabble who had been watching the confrontation all remembered at once they had voices… and weapons. Ren looked around, trying to find an escape route as Cú jumped down to the ground. He gave her one glance, meeting her gaze clearly, and then picked up Tora under his free arm. Then, with a nod, he leapt away with both woman and girl, leaving Jack, Merlin and Ren behind.

“Mommy?” said Jack, looking warily at the waving swords encircling them. Her knives rematerialized in her hands. Ren didn’t doubt that the little Servant could cut their way out of the crowd, but it would be nightmarish and even more energy-expensive than this mission had been so far.

“Excuse me,” said Merlin, walking past two armed men without a glance. “No, no need to fight right now. You want to live, I can see.” As he passed, men became still and quiet, staring at the mage, or maybe at something only they could see.

He took Ren’s hand in his and pulled her forward. “Come along, Serendipity. You’ve done enough for today.”

Silently, she pulled her hand away from his. But she followed him, and Jack followed her, and so they made their way out of the Irregulars' camp.


	17. Ritsu Gets Something Off Her Chest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two requests for more Ritsu, granted.

As Ren and her companions moved through the forest, the clear morning rang with birdsong. Nobody spoke, and the ugly scene at the Irregulars’ camp rapidly acquired the surreal feeling of a nightmare. But she could still taste the dirt and feel Artoria’s boot on her neck, and the fear and certainty with which she’d started the mission had been replaced by a hollow exhaustion.

Merlin fell back and walked beside her for a few moments. Once, she caught him looking at her sidelong, unsmiling, and she pointedly looked away. He didn’t bother trying to explain himself, which hurt even through the hollowness. Apparently she wasn’t even worth one of his lies now.

It didn’t matter. She hadn’t come here for him.

At first that was an empty thought, but as they approached the fortress and Ritsu appeared on the shattered wall, waving in welcome, Ren’s self-reassurance developed more substance. When Ritsu hopped over the wall and scrambled toward them, Merlin said, “I’ll go on ahead and check on Tora.”

Ren told herself that was even better. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

“Are you two all right?” exclaimed Ritsu, grabbing at Ren’s Command Seal hand with both of her own.

“Mommy started crying,” said Jack soberly. “We had to do something, even though Mommy didn’t order it.”

A dull pang echoed in Ren’s heart and she reached back to draw Jack into a one-armed embrace. “It didn’t hurt that much but you did the right thing. Thank you.”

Ritsu joined in the hug, ruffling Jack’s pale hair. Then, each younger girl holding one of Ren’s hands, they walked along. After a moment, Ritsu said, “Tora’s asleep. Cú thinks she’ll get better once she’s rested. She’s going to be pretty mad, though. I hope she’ll _listen_ to me this time.”

“What happened last time?” Jack asked.

“Oh, well. She came to me after they captured her. I thought she’d escaped at first, you know? But she didn’t care about any of our orphans, or the village or anything. Just me. She told me she’d realized we couldn’t ever win against the Sovereigns. That the only way to be safe was to go with her. She was so _angry_ about it.” Ritsu gave a little shiver. “I showed her how my Seals had manifested and she just… shut down. Like I’d broken her. And then she left. She only came back a few weeks ago, when she came to the village with Sovereign soldiers.”

Ren thought about that a moment and then gave up, saying, “Well, we’ll sort it out. You’re not alone anymore, and getting inside people’s heads is what Merlin is _good_ at.” She frowned. “Wait, was that bitter?”

She glanced over and met Ritsu’s dark, measuring gaze. Thoughtfully, the girl said, “I didn’t really summon you, did I?”

Ren blinked and stiffened. “I have no idea. Why would you say that?”

Ritsu simply looked at her more, until Ren said, “Look, I don’t know who summoned me, but _you_ are the reason I’m here. I’m certain of that.”

And she was. Because Ritsu was _lucky_.

“Anyhow, you seemed pretty sure yesterday,” Ren finished, scowling despite herself. “You said you were a genius.”

Ritsu blinked up at her. In a practical tone, she said, “I am. But part of being a genius is seeing what’s really there.”

As if Ritsu had caught on fire, Ren tried instinctively to jerk her hand away. But the two younger girls held on too well and as Ritsu kept talking,, Ren slowly relaxed again.

“I mean, yeah, sometimes it takes me a while. It’s not like there’s anybody teaching me.” Ritsu looked down, kicking a stick. “But I see _you_. You’re… a person.”

Neutrally, Ren said, “And your familiars aren’t?”

“Not the same way, no.” Ritsu frowned. “Familiars don’t doubt themselves. The situation? Yeah. Themselves? Never.”

Ren wanted to reject the entire premise, but she couldn’t. She read _familiar_ as _Servant_ , as _king_ and _hero_ and _god._ Familiars didn’t doubt themselves. She believed that. She’d seen that, with Artoria just now. And, oh, did Ren doubt herself.

Therefore she wasn’t a _king_ , a _god,_ a _hero._ She was nobody. She was a prop, or possibly an accident. It was bad logic, but at that moment, an unavoidable answer.

Ren’s feet stopped moving. She stared dully at the ground until Ritsu’s orange hair flashed across her vision. “You think this is bad news?”

“Ritsu… I don’t know _where_ I came from. I don’t even know if I’m real. I might just be an elaborate practical joke.” Ren raised her head and found Ritsu unexpectedly glaring at her from a few inches away.

Very quietly, Ritsu said, “You may have missed this part.” Her whisper became a bellow. “YOU. ARE. A. PERSON.”

As Ren reeled backward, Ritsu whirled and stomped away, talking at a high rate to her familiar. “Oh my goodness, foxette, does the air leave your brain when you get that tall? Is that the only explanation? It’s everywhere. And that’s why nobody believes me. NOBODY LISTENS.” She turned around and shouted back, “Jack, you have to help me _stay_ _short_ , okay?” and then marched ahead until she reached the broken fortress wall.

When Ren and Jack caught up with Ritsu, she gave Ren a baleful look. “That was so stupid it distracted me from why I asked.”

Her mind still full of numb buzzing long after her ears stopped ringing, Ren said meekly, “Sorry.”

Ritsu gave her a firm little nod, and then her entire demeanor once again reverted to her sunny, slightly-overexcited norm. “So if I didn’t summon you, I keep asking myself, um… did I summon something else when I thought I’d summoned you?” She frowned. “I mean, um, I may have summoned something else. That is, I _probably_ summoned something else, and it’s probably… bad?”

“Only probably?” asked Cú mockingly, jumping down from the ramparts.

Ritsu looked intensely self-conscious. “Well, I mean, the book says _something_ always comes through but a lot of that book is clearly lies, so that might be too?”

“Can’t you control it with your Command Seal?” Ren asked, with forced curiosity. She could feel Cú’s gaze on her, and couldn’t bear to meet it. Maybe later, after some quiet time and more tea. Maybe then. Or maybe not. As long as she could be helpful, she’d at least try.

“Not if I haven’t defeated it,” said Ritsu.

“According to the book,” said Cú helpfully.

Ritsu just gave him a dark look. “But it still gets sent back if I die.”

Ren winced, suddenly understanding why Tora might have wanted to keep her little sister from being a Summoner. “Ow. But if something came through, why didn’t it fight you?”

“Maybe it wanted to live,” said Jack softly.

“Like a person,” sighed Ritsu. Then she shouted, “I really REALLY wish stupid dead grown-ups had maintained the castle so I wouldn’t ever end up wondering how portals really work!”

“Wanting to live isn’t bad _,”_ argued Ren after the echoes died away, her eyes on the shattered tower rising behind Cú’s ear.

“From my point of view, it depends on what the beast eats,” said Cú, sounding more cheerful than he had since he contracted with her. “Tracking it down will be a good training mission. Thanks, Ritsu.” His gaze moved once again to Ren, and she dropped her eyes.

After a minute, the Lancer said, “Well, I’m going to go keep an eye on Tora’s troop. This is the only first battle of a war, and I’d like a little more knowledge about our enemies. I’ll check in soon.”

He seemed to be waiting for a response from Ren, so she mumbled, “All right. Good idea.”

Instead of leaving, Cú put his hand on her head. “Hey. My lady. What’s wrong? You won.”

“She’s been like this,” said Ritsu worriedly. “Jack, _did_ she get really hurt?”

“I’m all right,” said Ren , trying to shake off the mood. She _had_ won. Her plan had basically worked _._ No matter how she’d come to be in Ritsu’s world, she was there now. “I just need… some time.”

“Ah,” said Cú. “Your first battle? She’ll be fine, little miss. I’ll be sure to bring back more meat, though.” He touched Ren’s head one more time, and then sprang into the forest.

“Meat,” mumbled Jack. “Berries. I’m _hungry_ , Mommy.”

Quickly, Ritsu said, “There’s still some bird left. Why don’t you come have a snack while Ren takes a nap?”

“I’ll brush your hair later, Jack,” said Ren, when Jack looked at her for permission. “You should enjoy the food first.”

Ritsu gave her another one of those keenly perceptive looks as they walked into the keep together, but only said, “I’m truly glad you’re here, Ren.” Then she hustled Jack downstairs, leaving Ren to sit down on her bed in front of the giant empty hearth.

Motes of dust danced in the dappled light filtering in through the crumbling windows and missing stone blocks. Serendipity sighed, gathering up one of the blankets to her chest and hugging it. Again and again she replayed the confrontation with Artoria in her mind, trying to banish the sting. Her final conclusion never varied. She _could_ act, so she _would_ , however she arrived in this situation.

But Merlin’s silence was a splinter in her confidence that she couldn’t wiggle loose. She rolled around on the bed, inhaling the scent of flowers he’d infused into her bedding, and couldn’t come up with a single good reason he hadn’t even pretended to reassure her.

Finally, she sat up and shouted, “Merlin!”

He stepped around the door frame as if he’d been waiting on the other side. “Now, now, there’s no need to shout,” he said in his usual cheerful voice. “You know, I’ve been studying Tora and I think—”

“ _Merlin_ ,” Ren said, with a good deal more anguish. He stopped talking, his usual half-smile fading from his face.

After a moment, he crossed the great hall and stood beside her bed. “May I sit down?”

“Feel free,” said Ren, scooting to the head of the bed so he had plenty of room.

He did so, tucking his staff under the bed. Then he leaned back until he stretched across the width of the bed with his head hanging off the other side. His hair flopping like a mop, he said, “I was wrong earlier. It _was_ hard to work against her.”

“Why would you lie about that?” demanded Ren.

He turned his head toward her, although the edge of the bed mostly blocked them from seeing each others’ eyes. “Not a lie. A mistake. Not my first. Not with her.” He hesitated. “I didn’t think she’d see you as… as a younger version of herself. I would never have compared the two of you.”

“Because she’s Arthur Pendragon and I’m nobody?” It slipped out before Ren could stop herself.

Merlin propped himself up on his elbows to look at her. “Do you care so very much where you came from?”

A quick shudder ran through Ren. She didn’t. Whatever her origins, they weren’t worth remembering. “I _don’t._ But I care if you… if you…” Words failed her. She’d known he was a liar from the beginning, so why did it hurt her so much that he might have hidden his knowledge of her origins?

She struck out wildly for something to say, because anything was better than the mildly curious way he was looking at her, like she was a science experiment just a bit outside of parameters. “If I’m just a blank soul you stuck into an artificial body, I care that you clearly did it wrong.”

Merlin flopped down again. “I don’t know yet if you’re _nobody_ , but you’re not a blank soul, and I had nothing to do with attaching it to your body.”

Abruptly, the splinter piercing her heart disappeared. Ren promptly tried to catch at it and put it back. Because Merlin was a cheat and a liar, and she had no reason to believe his words, because feeling better so easily at his words made her exactly the fool she was afraid to be.

It was no use. Her heart trusted him, as it had since the beginning. She scowled. “You could have said that earlier.”

“I’m sorry,” he said absently, swishing his hair back and forth. “I was thinking about… something else.”

Annoyed, Ren kicked his hip with her bare foot, and he promptly caught it. His fingers curved around the arch of her foot and his thumb brushed her toes. When she tried to pull her foot away, his grip remained firm. And when she kicked with her other foot to free the first one, he caught that one in his other hand.

Then, before she quite knew what had happened, he’d yanked and twisted them both. When she caught her balance, she found herself on top of him, straddling his stomach, her legs bent double and his hands curved like manacles around her ankles. His head still hung off the bed. For a moment she sat absolutely frozen, trying to work out how he’d gotten her into that very embarrassing position.

“I wouldn’t have compared you because I know _everything_ about Artoria and not nearly enough about you.” He raised his head to look at her again and Ren felt his abdominal muscles move under her. “I thought I knew enough to recognize when you’d been defeated, but… no, not even that.”

His words cut through her shocked paralysis. “You _gave up on me?”_

“I wouldn’t have let her kill you,” he said quietly.

“Just put her foot on my neck to shove my face in the dirt,” said Ren caustically, welcoming the bite of anger once again.

Once again Merlin moved unexpectedly, moving fluidly as he sat up such that Ren slid down to his thighs and her legs curled behind his back. One of his hands slid up to her knee, while a single knuckle of the other stroked down her cheek. “Yes. I may have forgotten, just a little, just how weak and fragile you are.” His hand dropped to her other knee. “But you didn’t need me after all.”

Ren wriggled to see if she could slither off him and then promptly stopped as his eyebrows raised. Gruffly, she said, “Well, you were useful as the getaway driver, at least. Uh. Could you let me go?”

“Hmm?” he said, tilting his head as he scanned her face. “Ah. But I feel like you’ll kick me again if I do. Really, Ren, if you didn’t want me in your bed you could have just said no. I did ask.” He smiled. “Besides, I like having a girl on my lap. If you put your arms around my neck, that’d be even better.”

“You’re right,” said Ren, relishing her fury. “I _would_ kick you again. And the only way I’ll put my arms around your neck is to _throttle you_.”

“Well then,” he said cheerfully, sliding his arms up her thighs to lock at the small of her back. “Here we are. Stuck like this.” His gaze went distant again.

Ren, ready to fend off almost anything he tried next, was completely taken aback when he gave a tiny sigh and dropped his forehead against her shoulder. Once more, she experienced mood whiplash.

Nervously, she sat very still, waiting for whatever happened next. Tendrils of pale, prismatic hair drifted under her nose as he held her tightly to him. Then, his voice muffled, he said, “She told me once, so long ago, that I’d been a good mentor. It _hurt._ I knew exactly what was coming, but I didn’t tell her. I’d warned her as a child, after all. But her gratitude _hurt_ me. And I _thought_ I’d finally understood why. Now… I’m not so sure.”

 _Not going to stroke his hair, not going to stroke his hair, NOT GOING TO STROKE HIS HAIR._ Ren’s hands balled into fists at her side. “You know I have no idea what you’re talking about, right?”

She heard rather than saw his smile. “I do. And your confusion is adorably reassuring. You smell nice, too.”

That was it. Ren flailed at him with hands and feet, until he unlocked his hands and she rolled down his legs and onto the flagstones, somehow tangled up in blankets that softened her fall. She sat up, her hair falling in her face. “Let’s get some things straight, you trash mage.”

“I’m eagerly listening,” he assured her solemnly, leaning forward to look down at her.

She sat up more, assuming a more formal position and frantically fussing her hair away from her face before saying, “I’m here to help Ritsu. You’re here to help me. I don’t care where I came from. I don’t care where _you_ came from. We’re going to use the Servant summoning system to fix this screwed up world.” She paused, wondering if she ought to add something about no lying or unsolicited snuggles.

“Is that it?” he asked, his eyes wide.

She decided against it for now. “Does there need to be more?”

He pulled out his staff and stood up, smiling at her: deceptively cheerful. “No, no, not at all.”

He was probably lying. But she didn’t mind. Her heart, god damn it, had been right. Because Merlin couldn't give up on somebody he’d created the way he’d briefly given up on her. His ego was simply too large. The thought should have hurt. And it did twinge, a little. But she could still feel his arms around her waist, his head on her shoulder, and she remembered Ritsu’s words about familiars, and self-doubt.

With her, if only for a moment, Merlin had let himself be a person.


	18. Ren Gets Grooming Advice

As Ren sat on her heels staring up at Merlin thoughtfully, Jack appeared from the stairs down, followed by Ritsu.

“Mommy, we ate and ate but we’re still _so hungry.”_

 _“_ I brought the grooming basket,” said Ritsu apologetically. “I tried to let you rest but she started talking about going to the village to find food.”

Ren went cold, and reached out for the basket as Merlin stepped out of the way. “Thank you for letting her come to me instead.”

Ritsu sighed as she looked at Ren’s expression. “I wondered. I mean, normal familiars don’t even eat, just drink, and if they can’t get recharged by their Summoner, they can cause a lot of trouble. It’s why I’m worried about that one summoning gone wrong.” As Jack came over to Ren and hugged her, Ritsu gave Ren a keen look. “What’s special about you and Merlin is that you don’t seem to need any recharge at all.”

“Oh, I do,” said Merlin. “I just get it from elsewhere. But Ren doesn’t even have that, which _is_ interesting. Now… Ritsu, would you go sit with Tora for a while? I think she’ll give us her parole when she awakens but it wouldn’t do for her to awaken alone.”

“Wait,” Ren objected. “I wanted to get some tips on the magic hair brushing.” Jack had used an enormous amount of power in her brief fight with Artoria, and Ren had serious concerns about her ability to replenish it.

Merlin said, “I don’t think she can help you, Ren, but I may be able to. When I watched you and Jack earlier I had some ideas.”

Ren hesitated and then shrugged. “Okay. You’re the expert.”

Merlin beamed. “So nice of you to realize that!” He sat back on the bed again, behind Ren.

Ritsu, looking conflicted, said, “I’m so curious! But I want to go sit with Tora.”

“Hungry, mommy!” Jack said, still clinging to Ren. Her eyes gleamed in a disturbing way as she added to Ritsu, “We won’t let Caster do anything weird to Mommy, don’t worry.”

“Eheheh.” Merlin scratched his cheek. “This may be exciting! You watch Tora for me, Ritsu.” Then, as Ritsu left, he leaned forward and reached between Jack and Ren to pluck a comb from the grooming basket in Ren’s lap.

Jack promptly bit his arm through his mantle and then recoiled. “Yuck! You taste as nasty as you smell!”

“Well, I’m not your mommy,” said Merlin reasonably. “Ren, you go ahead and brush her hair while I comb yours.”

Ren eyed him. While he once again wore his usual faint smile, he seemed reasonably serious, so she decided to go along with him. Besides, if she didn’t tend to Jack soon, it seemed very possible the little Servant would be taking a bite out of her next.

So she turned her back on Merlin, positioned Jack in front of her and started running her fingers through Jack’s fine, flyaway hair to pull apart forming tangles. Once she’d moved onto gentle brushing, she felt Merlin’s gentle touch against her own scalp. Quietly, he began to hum as he started combing her hair: an atonal scattering of notes that had more of the cadence of speech than music.

Ren did her best to focus on the feel of Jack’s hair against her fingers instead of what Merlin did. Jack’s restless squirming certainly helped. “More, more, _more_ , mommy.”

Merlin stopped combing Ren’s hair, but his humming continued. Then he said, “Give me that brush for a moment, Ren,” reaching over her shoulder.

“Um, sure,” said Ren, releasing it to his grasp and immediately switching to braiding and unbraiding strands of Jack’s hair. A few minutes later, Merlin, still humming, returned the brush to her, clean of the loose hair it had accumulated from both Jack and Cú.

Jack tilted her head back to look at Ren. Her eyes had an empty shine. “Mommy… can’t we go find some better food? Maybe those soldiers who touched you all over.”

Nervousness became full-on dread. Remembering how more extensive physical contact had helped Cú, Ren dropped the brush and pulled Jack into her lap to cuddle her. “We’ll find something better than that, I promise.”

Jack, her small body cold, nestled in Ren’s arms, pressing her forehead against Ren’s arm like she had a headache. “Hungry…”

Merlin’s humming stopped again. “Ren, I need you to brush my hair for a few minutes.”

Ren craned her neck around to give Merlin an incredulous look. “This is _really_ not the time—” She stopped as she saw his serious expression, and remembered him saying he didn’t exactly know how it felt. He had multiple fine strands of light woven around the fingers of one hand, as if in the midst of a game of cat’s cradle.

Helplessly, she glanced down at the Servant in her arms. Jack’s pale head was bowed and her body curled tight, but she pressed into Ren with an almost painful intensity. And when Ren looked at Merlin again, he had a distant, measuring look in his eyes.

She remembered how he’d believed her defeated at Artoria’s feet. This, Ren realized, was a different kind of battle, and once again Merlin wasn’t going to come to her rescue.

If the magus moved in front of her, she could probably manage to awkwardly brush his hair around Jack. As an immediate solution it seemed obvious but… non-optimal. While Jack had the body and emotions of a child, she had the soul of a monster and the power of a Servant. It was a tricky combination to handle.

“Come on, Jack, I need to get up for a few minutes.” Jack’s grip on Ren only tightened, so Ren gave her an encouraging shove. “I’ll be back and then we’ll find you something good.”

Jack’s shoulders trembled. When she raised her head, her eyes were glowing like a cat’s at night. In a throaty voice she growled, “ _Lying Caster._ ”

Ren pressed her lips together and then heaved herself forward despite the child clinging to her. Unsteadily, she rose to her feet, keeping Jack balanced with one hand and her own balance with the other. Once standing, she pried Jack off her and set her on her own two feet. Then, without releasing her, Ren bent to look her in the eye. It involved actively disruptingJack’s line of sight to Merlin, whom she hadn’t ceased staring at through all the maneuvering.

“ _Jack_ ,” said Ren firmly. “Look at me. If you want me to be your mommy, you have to trust me. I’m not going anywhere. Be patient while I figure out feeding you.”

Jack scowled and wrenched herself away from Ren, crouching down and hugging her knees. She continued to stare up, her eyes still glowing.

Ren accepted it. Good behavior mattered;a good attitude was probably asking too much. Briskly, she sat on the bed next to Merlin and started brushing the long hair flowing down his back. It pooled behind him on the bed and she didn’t even try to run the brush through the full length. The strands felt like cool silk against her fingers, and glimmered with the faintest prismatic light.

After brushing for a moment, she became aware that the cool silky sensation and the prismatic glimmers lingered with her hand even when she released Merlin’s hair to pick up another hank. The brush, too, had developed a shine. She paused a moment, looking at her hand, and Merlin said, “A little more, please. My analysis is almost complete.”

Ren returned to brushing and the glimmer became a sparkle. “It’s working with you?”

“In a limited sort of way. I had to tweak some parameters. Now hush.” He moved his hands, playing with the strands of light. “You can stop now, but don’t run off to hunt down soldiers with Jack just yet.”

Ren immediately put the brush down and went back to Jack, picking her up and holding her out in front of her much like Cú had done with her the day before. Jack, however, responded as Ren never would have, immediately making like a starfish around Ren’s torso and neck.

“What’s he doing?” Jack whispered, pressing her cheek to Ren’s.

“Trying to be helpful,” Ren whispered back. “Give him a break, he’s not used to it.”

A faint smile flickered across Merlin’s face, but he continued focusing on his threads of light. After another moment, he stretched the threads between both hands until they were taut.The light poofed into sparkles, and two woven bands, one blue and one white, dangled from his fingers.

Ren narrowed her eyes and took a step closer. “Are those _friendship bracelets_?”

“They’re bracelets, anyhow,” said Merlin cheerfully. “Your wrist, please. I discovered a problem in your ability to process and convert between local mana and your personal mana. Nothing that can hurt you, but you’re dramatically less efficient than Ritsu. These bracelets, crafted from your Servants’ hair and stabilized by my particular genius, should help.”

He finished tying both of the bracelets onto Ren’s wrist. “Go ahead and try. It won’t be fast and it won’t be as good as Magical Paths, but it should be significantly better.”

Dubiously, Jack said, “We think soldier hearts would be better.”

“You’re wrong, little one,” said Merlin. “They’ll be satisfying for a moment, but then you’ll want another, and another. There’s hardly any energy at all there.”

Ren swung Jack around as she sat on the bed. “Ah, junk food. No good at all, especially when you’re starving.” Ruthlessly, she started dragging the brush through Jack’s hair. After only a few strokes, she could feel that coolness she’d felt brushing Merlin’s hair. No glimmers or sparkles appeared, but Jack tilted her head back, her eyes closing.

“Oh yes, this is _much_ better, mommy.”

“Maybe we should thank Merlin,” said Ren thoughtfully, more to tease Merlin than anything else. She glanced at him when he didn’t respond, and saw his own gaze fixed on something near the door. Following his line of sight, she saw a black lizard about the size of the hairbrush creeping forward.

Suddenly Merlin swooped on it, catching it with one hand. Its little legs scurried and its head, poking out of his fist, twisted this way and that. “And who are you?” he asked it, turning it this way and that. “Hmm.” He glanced over at Ren and Jack. “I’m going to take this little fellow somewhere else and see what he wants. Let me know when you’re done, and I’ll talk to you about Tora.”


	19. Cú's Work Is Interrupted

Ren spent what felt like an hour brushing Jack’s hair, settling into a rhythm of brushing and rebrushing that relaxed her almost as much as the nap she didn’t take. Meanwhile, Jack melted under the attention, becoming as limp and happy as a cat in a sunbeam.

After a time of her thoughts simply freewheeling, Ren started thinking about what she needed to do next. Gather intel from Cú, Merlin and hopefully Tora, of course. Make sure the villagers knew of their victory. There’d be more cooking to do, unless grateful villagers offered to feed them. Somehow she doubted that, though.

Ren also wanted to get more self-defense training, although she wasn’t confident that Merlin’s approach suited her. She wondered why she couldn’t use magic like Ritsu apparently could. Something that kept her out of close quarters certainly seemed more useful than chasing people around with a sword.

But she knew why, didn’t she? It had to be the same reason she didn’t have Magical Paths. She wasn’t particularly suited to be here. It was even possible that it was some kind of cosmic accident. Her first victory had been lucky. No, not even luck: coincidence, and much more to do with Artoria fixating on Merlin than anything she’d done. She’d end up dead soon enough.

At this point, Ren’s brushing slowed and then stopped as she recognized the direction of her thoughts. Then she attached a red ribbon to Jack’s hair, gave the drowsing child a hug, and stood up.

“Mommy?” Jack said, lifting her head.

Touching Jack’s hair again, Ren said, “All done for now. Still starving?”

Jack shook her head. “Nuh-uh, but we’re not full, either. More?”

“Later,” Ren promised. “I have something else that needs taking care of. But you can sleep in my bed, if you like. I’ll tuck you in.”

Jack’s whole face lit up. “Oh, yes please.” She scrambled into the pile of blankets and poked her head out.

Ren tucked her in and gave her a kiss on the forehead, keeping her attitude light and cheerful despite the black thoughts pinwheeling through her mind. Then she left the Great Hall and leaned against the corridor wall, rubbing her head.

“Merlin?” she said aloud, hopefully.

A door down the corridor opened and Merlin’s shaggy white head poked out. “Ah!” he said, before frowning and repeating, “Ah,” in a very different voice. Then he came out and closed the door behind him, joining Ren. “I set up a Bounded Field in Tora’s room, which apparently kept out the portal leakage as well as keeping her little familiars in.”

“That black lizard?” Ren asked, tensely.

“Yes,” said Merlin cheerfully. He took her by the elbow. “Don’t stand there, Ren. Let’s walk. Tora has a handful of night lizards, according to Ritsu. Mostly harmless, but I didn’t want Jack deciding they’d be a good snack.”

Ren shook her head rapidly, letting Merlin pull her along to the stairs down and out of the pooling negative aura. “Could you set up a Bounded Field around the portal that would contain this miasma?”

Merlin considered the idea. “I could, of course. But it seems like that would be turning off an early warning system. Letting the power build up too much would lead directly to a bad end, I’m sure.”

As they reached the bottom of the stairs, Cú poked his head out of the kitchen. “Good. You two can deal with that while I work on prepping my pig.”

Ren blinked and pulled away from Merlin to go look in the kitchen, where a headless pig occupied the stone table. It wasn’t an enormous beast but it probably weighed more than a grown man, even without its head. Several runes had been burned into its hide and Cú himself had blood all over his hands and spattered on his bare chest.

“That’s a whole pig,” Ren said blankly, and then, “How are we going to eat a whole pig before it goes bad?”

Cú said cheerfully, “Aw, if it comes to that, there’s a cool room under the pantry, and a smokehouse outside the keep. But I don’t think it will. Jack and I can eat a lot, and I’m thinking you’ll have another mouth to feed soon? Or rather two, since I’m sure Tora will be starving when she wakes up.”

“I’ve resolved some of the recharge latency,” said Merlin, inspecting the pig. “But good food will certainly help.”

Ren frowned. This seemed bad somehow, but she couldn’t see exactly how.

Then Merlin turned around and made as if to shove her again. This time, she saw it coming and stepped backward, shaking her head and feeling the miasma once again recede.

“Good, good,” said Merlin. “Let’s go resolve this before it gets worse, okay?”

“Yeah…” said Ren, leaving the kitchen. “But we can’t do this every day. It’s too much, too quickly.”

“Can’t _?_ ” asked Merlin, a note of challenge in his voice as he quirked an eyebrow.

Ren narrowed her eyes, thinking. _I can’t_ did sound a lot like a plan to simply give up when things became tough. Would she do that?

Miasma aside, no, she damn well wouldn’t. But if she ended up summoning more Servants than she could manage, her refusal to give up would lead her places she’d much rather not go. Carefully, she said, “We need to prioritize fixing the portal, or I’m going to have to make some rash decisions you definitely won’t like.”

Merlin chuckled. “Better.” He looked into the portal room, where the blue lines of magic along the walls flickered. “This room already had a Bounded Field, you see. But it’s a lot of work to understand all the different magical structures here. Maybe you could focus your prayers on another Caster? That would allow me to focus on more important things.”

“Somehow I’m certain what you consider important and what I consider important don’t overlap much,” grumbled Ren. “But I’ll keep it in mind.” She curled her fingers into fists and then opened them, studying her hands. The nick at the base of each thumb was all but invisible, but her palms were bruised, rough and reddened from all she’d done the past two days.

“Let me see,” said Merlin, and took both her hands in his. Then he closed his hands around hers, as if they were praying together and a silken coolness entangled itself between her fingers. When he released her, her hands were clean and healed. “ _That_ I won’t do again, if we must keep doing this, or you’ll end up with a permanent wound.”

“How so?” Ren asked, eyeing him warily as he pulled his sword out of his staff.

“This sword, being what it is, both inflicts an injury on your body and also alters your Origin. Now, such a small alteration wouldn’t normally permanent. But Avalon could be said to work by enhancing your Origin.” He smiled charmingly. “Shenanigans might result from the combination.”

She closed her fingers over her palm as he reached for her hand. “Why did you do it this time, then?”

“Because what I _wanted_ to do was kiss the red away and that would have taken longer. Have you changed your mind about doing this?” He touched the back of her hand, but didn’t take it.

Blinking at his offhand explanation, Ren instinctively moved her hand to his. He lifted it, turned it palm up, and re-opened the nick she’d used the day before, all in the space of a moment.

“Go on, then. Remember how useful another Caster would be!”

Ren shook her head violently again, half to disperse the miasma and half to throw off her reaction to Merlin’s teasing. Then she turned and moved close to the portal and spent another moment trying to center herself.

“Focus, Ren,” came Merlin’s voice, immediately distracting her again. Grimacing, she held her palm over the darkly swirling portal and let the first few drops of blood splash in.

Merlin wanted a caster, or at least somebody who could do the work of understanding and repairing the portal room. Ren thought it might be nice to get somebody who could repair the whole fortress.

She kept wondering what Merlin’s lips on her palms would have felt like, and getting angry that he’d teased her like that, now. Didn’t she have enough to think about?

She needed somebody thoughtful. Somebody genuinely kind. Somebody she could talk to.

How dare Merlin make jokes like that? Between his teasing and the way he kept trying to manage and manipulate her, she could slap his face.

But she had to focus, _focus._ The energy of the portal needed to be channeled into a Servant.She needed to calm her tempestuous thoughts and _focus._

The final drop of blood dripped into the portal and night-colored light streamed out, catching Ren by surprise. She hadn’t thought it had been so many. She’d been so distracted…

The light coalesced into a man’s form. Slender, golden hair. Unarmed.

He glanced down at his gloved hands, and then at his surroundings, before focusing on Ren. Then, in a gentle voice he said, “I believe introductions are in order, Miss?”

“I’m Serendipity,” Ren said slowly, and then stopped. She stared at him, at his delicate, attractive features; his neat, ordinary clothing. No story bubble drifted forward. She almost disbelieved he was a Servant. He certainly didn’t have the presence Cú and Jack had.

But as he waited for her to continue, his weight shifted and features she’d seen as delicate became _sharp._ “Nothing?” he said, and his previously cultured voice was a gleeful rasp.

“Ren!” said Merlin behind her. “Get—”

The warning came too late as the Servant sprang forward, throwing his full weight onto Ren. She stumbled back and then crashed into the ground, her head banging against the wall. The Servant was on top of her, his hands closing around her throat and an unholy grin stretching across his face.

As his thumbs pressed into her throat, she knew, _she knew_ who he was. Terror made everything clear. _Once again_ , she’d failed to specify _heroic_ or even _not a serial killer._ And now she might die for it.

Clawing at his hands, she gasped voicelessly, “Hyde. You’re Hyde. Jekyll and Hyde.”

Hyde’s grin widened. “Hee hee hee.” Then his fingers loosened. “You recognized me first, _Master._ I’ll take you.” His hands moved down to her chest and he licked up her cheek to her ear. Just as his teeth brushed her earlobe, his weight against her lessened and vanished as Cú and Merlin hauled him off her.

He cackled again as they pulled him away. “Heee hee hah hah hee. Me first!” He made a convulsive effort to escape the other two, and then craned his head to see who held him. “Who are these shiny heroes?”

“Jekyll,” croaked Ren, rubbing her throat and wishing she had recovered her Command Seals already.

“Hah! Him! But it’s me you wanted, _Master_ ,” crowed Hyde. “Find my knife and I’ll kill these two for you.”

“Yeah, this guy was a mistake,” said Cú. “You want I should toss him back, my lady?”

“No,” said Ren, forcing herself to her feet. “But we _definitely_ need to fix the portal.”

She stood in front of the wild-eyed blond Servant, and he leaned forward against the holds on his arms, pulling himself into a position that had to be painful as if it were nothing at all.

“Hi there, Serendipity,” he whispered.

She remained quiet and still, merely looking at him, focusing on his eyes and her own breathing.

“Come on, come on, _come on_ ,” said Hyde. “Make them let me go and let’s go kill something. You want to do that, right? It’ll be fun. I’ll make you a garland of guts for your hair.”

Again, Ren only breathed quietly. And after a moment, Hyde grumbled, “Fine. _Fine_. But don’t forget, _you_ chose _me_.” His pupils dilated abruptly and he gasped for breath. “Oh, thank God,” said Jekyll, in that cultured voice from before.

“Let him go,” instructed Ren.

Merlin loosened his grip and Cú reluctantly followed suit. Jekyll spent a few seconds catching his breath and smoothing his clothes. Then he glanced at Ren with a wry little smile. “You have unusual survival instincts.”

Ren blinked. “Not from my perspective.”

Jekyll glanced down, straightening his gloves. Meditatively, he said, “You’ve bound him much more strongly than I, in any case.”

“That’s… good, isn’t it?” Ren frowned at the tone of Jekyll’s voice. From what she knew of him, she thought such a result would have made him happier.

He glanced up at her and then brushed his gloved thumb across where his other self had licked her. “Is it? We’ll certainly find out.”


	20. Ren Doesn't Look Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let's have a general meeting!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actual chapter 20, sorry about yesterday's double post!

“This is a general meeting so we’re all on the same page.” Ren settled herself on her bed in the great hall, waking a drowsing Jack as the other Servants arranged themselves as they pleased.

Cú leaned against the wall, his arms crossed. He’d cleaned himself up from his pig butchering with no more than a swirl of magic, and once again wore his armored bodysuit. Meanwhile, Merlin sat tailor-style before the bed, looking for all the world like a child about to watch a puppet show. Jekyll glanced between Merlin and Cú and settled for standing between them, his gloved hands behind his back.

Ren started by addressing him. “I know this is an unusual situation compared to where you’ve probably found yourself in the past, so here’s the basics. This isn’t our world of origin. But it’s a world that needs us. An overpowering enemy called the Sovereigns has been conquering the towns and territories via both military might and some kind of magical dominance. This is the last territory in this region—” she paused, glancing at Cú for confirmation, and went on when he nodded, “—and we’re here on behalf of a young girl named Ritsu who is down the hall right now.” She hesitated, and then finished with, “That’s most of what I know. But Merlin, you had some time with that mirror, and information about Tora, and Cú, you did some scouting. Fill me in.”

Merlin looked over his shoulder at Cú, who shrugged and spoke. “Some of Tora’s company are deserting already. There’s a core planning to remain, and messages have been dispatched to their local command, but they’re more interested in fortifying their own position and protecting that road than staking out berry fields. I can clean them out any time you want.” He scratched his cheek. “I also took a look at the borders again. There’s a lake to the south bordering this territory and two others. The territory boundaries are very obvious, roughly hexagonal, and spread around what I assume are summoner portals. Every portal I could detect save ours has a column of darkness over it.”

“How fascinating,” said Jekyll. He glanced at Merlin. “And you’re confident that this isn’t a Singularity?”

Merlin tilted his head. “Not the way you’re thinking. But there are hints it’s not a fully independent World either. For example, the Saber Artoria Alter we dealt with this morning, who manifested within the young woman sleeping down the hall. She’s still there, by the way, Ren. Haunting Tora’s dreams.”

Ren’s eyes narrowed as she thought about this. “But you think Tora will still give us her parole?”

Merlin stretched his legs out, leaning back on his hands. “Eventually. She may need some time to consider the consequences of returning to the Sovereigns first, especially since I broke that mirror.”

He gave Ren a bright-eyed, expectant look. She sighed and indulged him. “What’s up with the mirror?”

Beaming, Merlin said, “I’m so glad you asked. It operated as a conduit to what I can only describe as the local version of a Grail. Without it Artoria’s energy will be limited, and I imagine the serious-minded folks who created it won’t be pleased that it’s gone.”

Jekyll asked quietly, “Is it actually a local version of the Grail, or just similar in function?”

Merlin grinned at him. “I think you should lead the investigation there, starting with theportal Serendipity summoned you through. It’s in desperate need of maintenance, you see.”

With a small bow, Jekyll said, “Ah. I ‘m not a proper Mage, but I’m good with theory. I can certainly take a look, if our Master approves.”

Ren studied Jekyll. She knew he occupied the Assassin class, and had acquired significant skill with alchemical elixirs during life. He probably qualified as a genius. And yet he seemed so unassuming. “He’s pushing onto you work he could be doing himself, you know.”

Jekyll laughed gently. “Most likely. But I assure you, I’m quite used to serving as an assistant for those more gifted than myself. My own fault for being too interested in stars far beyond my reach, and yet I truly don’t mind. In fact, I’ll probably talk the Magus’s ear off at night with my ignorant questions and peculiar ideas.” He glanced at Merlin, and while his smile seemed innocent, Ren found herself uneasily reminded that Hyde had originated in this man.

Merlin’s eyes glittered but he said lightly, “Aren’t you a sweetheart? You’ll get along well with Ritsu. Well, if you think you can restrain yourself.”

A delicate flush colored Jekyll’s cheeks and his gaze dropped. “I’m most on my guard with the innocent.” The flush deepened and without looking up, he said, “Ah, however, I must ask how our Master is maintaining this many Servants? I did notice the lack of Magical Paths.”

“I have to brush your hair,” said Ren apologetically. “Merlin can make me a bracelet that will help, though. It works on Jack.”

Jekyll froze utterly, and then said, “Yeaaaah? Ah. No, don’t. Please, stop.” his voice shifting between Hyde’s rasp and his own. Ren’s breath caught in her still-bruised throat and her heart began to pound. If this was his reaction to the _mention_ of grooming, what would happen when he required it?

Cú appeared at Jekyll’s side without visibly crossing the intervening space, but Jekyll flung out his hand, fingers spread in a warding gesture, as he pressed two fingers on his other hand against his temple. “Please, I must…”

Jack, who had been nestling against Ren’s side listening quietly, sat up. “Mommy…? He’s bad.”

Merlin watched too, with a delighted interest that instantly raised Ren’s hackles. She told Jack, “He knows right from wrong and he’s at least _trying_ to make good choices.”

Jekyll raised his head at that and for a heartbeat, Ren thought she’d said something helpful.But his eyes glinted red as he looked directly at her. Moving slowly, like a wire stretched near breaking being inched just a little bit farther, he raised his hands to his hair and rumpled it wildly, before giving her that unholy grin.

Concentrating on her breathing instead of her wild heartbeat, looking him in the eye, Ren said evenly, “Yes. Eventually. You’ll have plenty of work.”

His eyes brightened. Then, all at once, the tension binding him broke and Jekyll resurfaced in the resulting slump. His hands closed into fists, and then he started smoothing his hair back down again. “You really do have strange survival instincts, Master. You made him happy, though, which allowed me to take control. Thank you.” But despite his thanks, Ren detected reproach in his glance. “He really is very strong here.”

Thoughtfully, she asked, “Do you think you might craft an elixir to suppress him?” She caught the tired expression that crossed his face and added, “You see, you’re not the only one with ignorant questions and peculiar ideas. Don’t worry, Jekyll. You saw how fast Cú moved when you changed. And I really would like you to focus on repairing the portal as soon as possible.”

“It’s important,” agreed Merlin, inspecting the other Servants. “Otherwise what you summon tomorrow might be 100% monster.”

Ren, who had thought that but refrained from saying it, sighed. “Thank you for that contribution, Merlin. What _will_ you be doing while you make poor Jekyll do your research?”

“Oh, I’ll find a way to stay busy.” He stretched out on the flagstones, resting his head on his hands.

Sternly, Ren said, “I want _useful_ , not just busy,” but Merlin just waved an uninformative but placating foot at her. She scowled. “When do you expect Tora to wake up?”

“Oh, how about around dinner time?” Merlin turned his head toward Cú, still lurking near Jekyll’s elbow.

“Not a bad idea,” said the Lancer. “Delicious meat and a hungry prisoner can really smooth out an interrogation.”

Ren went over the plans she’d made earlier and sighed again. “All right. After you’re done with your pig prep, try to get us some plates and stuff? And anything Jekyll might need? Meanwhile I,” she gave a third resigned sigh, melodramatic in its length, “need to learn more about combat.”

Merlin gave her a grin, his eyes sparkling with an amusement that abruptly became concern when Ren glanced down at Jack. “Would you help me, Jack? I bet between the two of us we can really mess Merlin up.”

A smile brightened Jack’s face. “Oh yes,” she agreed. “That will be _so_ much fun.”


	21. Ren Shares A Meal

Ren spent two hours playing a very complicated and changeable game of tag with Jack and Merlin. Eventually, when Cú sent Ritsu to get some exercise, she and the foxette joined in to make the game even more chaotic, and subsequently, Ren dropped into an exhausted nap as soon as she stretched out on her bed.

She woke to Jack’s gentle touch and the mouthwatering smell of roasted pork with garlic. As she blinked at the dimness of the Great Hall, Jack said, “Caster and Lancer want you to eat before Saber wakes up, Mommy.”

In response, Ren’s stomach gave a loud, long gurgle. Jack’s eyes widened. “You’re so hungry! I’m so sorry, Mommy. It hurts so much, right?”

With a wan smile, Ren said, “It’s easy for me to fix, at least.”

Jack hopped off the bed and pulled Ren to her feet. “Come, come! Come and see!”

Down in the kitchen, every trace of the pig butchery had been cleaned away and several half-demolished wooden platters of roasted and chopped meat sat in the middle of the table, along with wooden bowls, thick sliced brown bread, roasted potatoes and onions, and a pan of drippings.

Driven by the growling in her stomach, Ren hurried to the table and started filling a bowl before she noticed Jekyll, Cú and Merlin all watching her with interest. She favored Cú with a smile that brightened as she focused on the bread. “Were the villagers actually helpful?”

Cú snorted. “Them? Not likely. They’re all mice. Can’t imagine how the little miss came out of a village like that.”

Ren glanced down at the bread and up at Cú again, her eyebrows raised. He shrugged and scratched his cheek. “Well, I found the biggest house there, right? Walked right in, raided their kitchen. They all hid upstairs, except for a little scullery maid they’d forgotten about. She hid under the sink.”

Ren froze halfway through picking up a piece of bread, staring at Cú. There was just a hint of challenge in his eyes, and she realized Merlin and Jekyll were also closely observing her reaction. Only Jack didn’t seem to care what Ren thought of the raiding, instead eating meat straight off the platter until Cú reached out and hauled her away by the scruff of her neck.

Carefully, Ren laid the slice of bread on top of the meat in her bowl and used a wooden spoon to drizzle drippings on top. “Was the maid reassured when you told her about our win?”

“Little bit. The pig leg I left with her probably helped more though.” He paused to grin as Ren raised her gaze to him and then added, “I left about half of the bread at Ritsu’s house with those kids. Ritsu wants to bring ‘em here but I think the keep needs to be in better shape first.”

Ren sat on the floor and ate a bite of bread and meat and then asked, “Why didn’t you tell me you left the meat first?”

Cú crouched down near her. “Eh, I wanted to see how you reacted.” He put his finger under her chin. “Because if you needed what they had and I’d nothing to leave in exchange, I still would have taken it, my lady.”

Ren thought about that. “I think… in theory… that would be acceptable. But also… that you can always find something to offer in trade. You’re an armed warrior. You’re in the best position to _take_ , which means you shouldn’t ever have to.”

Cú looked at her for a long moment, his expression inscrutable. “You’re a beautiful woman, my lady, and you should start sleeping with a knife.”

As Ren blinked, working on tracing his line of thought, Jack bounded over, saying, “Yes, yes, that’s smart,” before sniffing at Ren’s bowl. “Why did you put the yummy stuff on the dry stuff, Mommy?”

As Cú rose, Ren shook herself and said to Jack, “Because it makes the bread taste better and the bread fills me up better than just meat alone.”

“Hmm,” said Jack, watching her with lambent eyes as she ate another bite.

As Ren ate, she stole glances at Merlin and Jekyll, neither of whom seemed inclined to interrupt her meal with their conversation, although they both watched her more than was comfortable. As soon as she finished her bowl, Merlin sprang to his feet and gave her a chore.

“All done? Let’s take a bowl to Ritsu and her sister. Can you make them up? You certainly enjoyed yours.”

Ren pulled a face at Merlin and moved to do that, asking Jekyll, “Did you eat, Doctor? It’s… it’s a good thing to do, especially if you have concerns about… other stuff.”

Jekyll gave her a gentle smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Merlin shared his observations with me. He even harvested some of my hair for one of the bracelets, although I think he needs some of yours still to complete the Mystic Code.”

Ren blinked, turning to look at Merlin as he stood impatiently in the kitchen doorway. “You used my hair, too?”

Merlin looked shocked. “Why do you think I was combing your hair?” Then he waggled his eyebrows, and Ren decided against answering.

Once she’d filled two bowls much like her own, Merlin took them from her with an entirely unnecessary comment about not wanting them spilled by a clumsy human, but once again, she resisted answering. She couldn’t tell if he was actually aiming to provoke her or not. Something about his quick movements almost convinced her he was _nervous._ It made her nervous, too.

Ritsu opened the door to her knock, her eyes widening at the bowls Merlin carried. The small room beyond had all four walls, the ceiling, and a floor with the debris swept into the corners. Tora had been placed on a narrow futon-style mattress and covered with a blanket. The woman’s red and gold armor had been neatly stacked in a corner and the woman’s orange-gold hair pooled around her head. Two small black lizards rested on her chest, while another perched on the armor pile.

After Merlin and Ren had crowded into the room, Merlin set the bowls down, closed the door and said in a light voice, “Time to stop teasing your sister, Tora. You don’t want your dinner to get cold.”

Tora’s eyes flickered open and her brow immediately furrowed. Pushing herself up on her elbows as the lizards skittered up to her shoulders, she turned her head from side to side, her gaze passing over Merlin and her armor to linger on Ren. “You… You’re _her_.”

And then a flush tinged her pale cheeks and she looked away, to Ritsu.

Ritsu met her gaze silently, biting her lip. After a moment, Tora said in a fast, pretty voice, “The last thing I clearly remember was an absolutely _spectacular_ man destroying my Eleron. And now I’m here, with a headache and bad dreams and it’s been _hours_ since I’ve eaten. I suppose the Sovereign’s mobile portal prototype didn’t work as planned.”

“We’ll be talking about that,” said Merlin cheerfully. “After we get some other details out of the way.”

Tora once again glanced at everybody in the room before settling on little sister. “Who are these people, Ritsu?”

But Ritsu, who’d spent most of the loyally waiting for her sister to wake up, only pressed her lips together and turned her head away.

Sighing, Tora sat up. “You’re still such a child.”

“An _incompetent_ , _foolish_ child,” flashed Ritsu, glaring.

Tora’s hands clenched into fists. “Don’t you understand yet? I _had_ to tell everybody that. If anybody realized how talented you were, the Sovereigns would have come for you.”

“But instead _you_ came for me,” said Ritsu bitterly.

Her face hardening, Tora said, “Once your Seals showed up, I realized it was the only way. The Sovereigns are the _only_ path forward for the world. Their triumph is a certainty. I _had_ to protect you.”

“Except now there’s us,” put in Ren quietly.

Tora blinked and then gave Ren a sidelong look. “You were in my dreams, when I was… somebody else. Both of you, but he was just an enemy, while you were… something else.”

Merlin pushed his lips out in an expression of annoyance. “ _Just_ an enemy? How… humiliating. Ah, well. Tora, whatever you intended to do with that mirror, what you _did_ was summon a Heroic Spirit into your own body. Later you were defeated by another Heroic Spirit embodied as a Servant by Ren here.”

Tora blinked thoughtfully. “And what’s a Heroic Spirit?”

It was Ritsu who answered. “It’s a sort of exalt familiar who used to be a person. Very powerful, hard to maintain.”

“ _I_ summoned an exalt?” This seemed to surprise Tora more than anything said thus far.

“As to that, I think the mirror did all the work,” said Merlin cheerfully. “It would have maintained the Heroic Spirit for you, too, but, alasa I broke it. So now while said Spirit still rests within you, her strength has been… limited.”

Tora’s face went white. “You _broke_ the mirror? I don’t believe you.” When Merlin only smiled at her, her gaze went far away. “Well… shit.”

Merlin’s gaze sharpened but all he said was, “You’re our prisoner for now, but you don’t have to remain under lock and key if you give us a promise of good behavior, and agree not to leave the Summoner’s Castle until we’ve sorted out your fate.”

“Sure,” said Tora, her gaze still distant. “You have my promise. That means I can eat, right?”

“Of course,” said Ren, and handed out the bowls. When Tora accepted hers, their gazes met briefly and the other woman looked away. She tried a bite of the meat and bread, frowned, and then emptied the bowl at high speed.

Amused, Ren said, “I’ll get you seconds.”

But before she could take the bowl, Tora said, “You seem very kind, and because of that I’m sorry that you were dragged into this. But you won’t win, you know.”

Ren hesitated before taking the bowl. “I don’t know. Cú defeated _you_ trivially, didn’t he?”

“Me?” Tora shrugged. “I’m nobody. Soft-trained, without a proper commission, and I screwed up the first mission my lord gave me. He’s… so much more than me, and the Sovereigns will want that mirror back. So you won’t be able to hold this Region.”

“What _happened_ to you, Tora?” demanded Ritsu. “Before you came back with _them_ all you wanted me to do was run away with you, and even that wasn’t like you.”

Tora looked away from her sister, her face twisting. “They… made me understand how powerful they were. I wouldn’t even be alive now if my lord hadn’t rescued me from their prison on a whim. He gave me this assignment, too. To capture you, one of the last free summoners. He told me it was my chance to prove myself to the Sovereigns, but I know he would have tried to keep you safe, not turned you over to their conversion camp. Taught you the way he taught me.” She sighed. “Maybe he still will, once he’s dealt with your friends. That’s all I can hope for now.”

Merlin said mildly. “So much despair. Is that why you gave your promise? No hope for yourself? Won’t your lord want you back as well as the mirror?”

The look that passed Tora’s face reminded Ren of a wounded animal. “No. I’ve failed too much. I won’t go back to him now. He can’t afford to be kind to a waste of space like me, and… and even if he was inclined so, I’d rather he take care of Ritsu. By staying here, I’ll at least be able to intercede for her when he takes the Castle. That’s all I can do for her now.”

For a moment, Ren stood paralyzed by the bleakness of Tora’s point of view. But then she shook herself and went to the door with Tora’s bowl. Once she’d had more food and rest, and seen what Cú and Jack could do, Tora would feel more optimistic, Ren felt certain.

As Ren opened the door, several voices sounded in her mind:

Cú and Jekyll both calling a warning of a threat overhead—

And another mental voice, a snarl that made her head ring, saying, _I will have speech with the Master of this Castle, or I will raze it to the foundations._

Ren left the bowl spinning on the flagstones as she dropped it and raced to the stairs. Merlin said brightly, “Ritsu, stay here with Tora, neither of you leave this room, and try not to hurt each other.” Then he followed Ren, slamming the door behind him.

A deep purple twilight cast the courtyard into gloom. As Ren stopped before stepping out, she felt Jack and Cú both settle around her in their dematerialized form, while either Jekyll or Hyde leaned against the wall outside. He’d found a knife somewhere, but he held it loosely and without a smile. She couldn’t see what had called for her, though.

Merlin bumped her from behind and said in exasperation, “Go out or let me do so.”

Annoyed, Ren stopped craning her neck and strode out of cover. And stopped.

A giant blue-white wolf stood in the air high above the keep, with some kind of slashing weapon gripped between his teeth. And on back sat a rider: male, with long black hair tumbling in the breeze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would love to fulfill any requests you have for slice-of-life or setting-exploration scenes suitable to the next few days of story-time! What would you like to see? More hairbrushing/cooking/fortress repair/Servant bonding scenes? More interactions with the locals? A hard focus on plot?


	22. Jekyll Has An Argument

Ren stared up at the wolf and rider, bubbles of story fizzing in her mind. One popped and her brow furrowed as she recognized the Servant that fit the description.

Well, mostly.

“Why does he have a _head_?” she asked under her breath.

“Because, as with Artoria, that’s a fusion between a local summoner and a Servant. We really must learn how they’re hacking our Grail,” said Merlin. He raised his staff high and called, “And why are you here, Avenger?”

The wolf Ren had identified as Lobo snarled like thunder, and a voice once again pounded in her head.

_Where is Lady Tora?_

“Oh, she’s safe,” said Merlin, with unexpected cheerfulness. “Healing. She quite enjoyed her dinner. Who’s asking?”

The wolf tossed his head, his ears flat, clearly holding back from jumping out of the sky to savage Merlin then and there. Ren understood the feeling.

_She belongs to my Master, the Sovereign Lord Kirri Zamaran. You will surrender her at once._

Merlin glanced at Ren, who shrugged and called, “No, we won’t.” Then she tensed to dodge back inside if this provoked an immediate attack.

The tall, still figure on Lobo’s back instead leaned forward to look down at them. _Then you will face the consequences. But first, show her to me._

Ren caught Merlin’s slight headshake. She said slowly, “No, we won’t do that either. But if you can control yourself for a moment, I’ll prove to you she’s alive and well.”

Without waiting for an answer, she ran back into the keep, down the stairs and to Tora’s chamber. Because while she was _prepared_ for a fight, if there was any chance of not—at least until she had some Command Seals back—she was going to take it.

“—learning the most amazing—” Ritsu stopped mid-sentence, startled, as Ren threw open the door. Tora had been listening to her with a sad expression.

“Don’t mind me, I just need one of these, I’ll be back soon.” She caught one of the dozing night lizards, Tora’s minor familiars, on the armor pile and then grabbed the breastplate as well, and hooked the door closed behind her as she left again.

Then she ran up the stairs and burst out into the courtyard. The wolf and his rider had descended a meter or so, but otherwise nothing at all had changed. Triumphant, Ren held up the armor piece with the night lizard on it. “She’s here, healthy and our prisoner.”

Lobo snarled like thunder once again, but the rider leaned forward to inspect Ren’s proof. Then the voice said, _My Master grants you time in which to surrender the woman and yourselves. If at dawn three days hence we must take her, we will then slay everybody in the castle. And if she dies, we will leave this Region a lifeless wasteland._

Without waiting for a response, the wolf sprang higher into the sky and then vanished.

Cú promptly materialized beside Ren, grinning, or at least baring his teeth. “I have to wait three days to fight an Avenger? Too bad. I may die of boredom beforehand. Maybe we can hunt him down first?”

Merlin, too, looked delighted. Ren understood Cú’s joy but she frowned at Merlin as Jekyll joined them. She tucked the armor plate under her arm, vaguely wondering where the night lizard had skittered off to. “What are you so happy about?”

With a chuckle, the magus said, “He didn’t say a word about a mirror, only Tora, Tora, Tora. He actually bonded with the Avenger driven by the loss of his mate. Yet she genuinely believes she’s worthless to him.” He laughed again. “I just love a good romance, don’t you?”

Cú said, “Isn’t your idea of a _good romance_ kind of… catastrophic to everybody involved?” He held up his hands as everybody looked at him. “I mean, better them than us, definitely.”

Ren said firmly, “No meddling.”

Looking shocked, Merlin said, “Absolutely not! I was just going to suggest we _not_ tell Tora about her Lord’s words. That would spoil everything.”

“Especially if we kill him,” said Jekyll calmly.

Cú pointed at Jekyll. “True. The most important point.” He rubbed his chin. “I wonder how he’ll fight. Love can really have an impact on a man’s tactics. Some guys get better when they’re desperate but some guys get worse.”

Ren said slowly, “Tora told us he was far more powerful than her, even without being a demi-Servant. And he won’t come alone, any more than I would.”

The Servants all looked at her. Uneasily, Cú said, “You’re not coming up with another of those plans, are you?”

“What plans are these?” asked Jekyll, raising an eyebrow.

“Not yet,” said Ren. “It’s too early for that. We have other things to worry about first.”

Jekyll repeated, patiently, “What kind of plans does she come up with?”

“We definitely can’t let Ritsu’s orphans move into the castle, though,” Ren mused thoughtfully. She shifted the armor piece under her arm and then released it when Cú reached over to take it from her.

“Aww,” said Cú, inspecting the armor idly. “Where’s your confidence? You don’t think we’re going to lose, do you?”

Ren sighed. “Look, if anybody’s going to be taken hostage here, it’s going to be me.”

Merlin pointed at Ren and said to Jekyll, “Those kind of plans.”

“Good God,” muttered Jekyll, a distinctly nervous expression crossing his face.

“I’m not _planning_ on being a hostage,” Ren pointed out. “I just don’t want some little kids to present themselves as attractive targets mid-battle.”

“Yes, you prefer to save that privilege for yourself,” said Merlin. “Hey, hey, _you_ said it, Serendipity. Why are we standing around outside in the dark?”

“I like the dark,” said Jack, who had silently materialized behind Merlin. She startled everybody but Ren, which made Ren feel better about the way they’d teased her.

Thoughtfully, she glanced between Jekyll, Cú and Jack. “I do think somebody should go and check out Lord Kirri’s forces. I’d like to know what his technology levels are, especially related to ranged and air attacks.”

“Ooh, ooh, me, Mommy.” Jack jumped up and down. “Nobody will ever see me. Even the doggie won’t be able to sniff me out.”

Ren bit her lip. She agreed with that, but Jack seemed so young. How much did she understand about the machinery of war?

Well, they had three days. If Jack’s report seemed to be missing something she could always try sending Jekyll later. But in the meantime, she needed Jekyll here, while Jack had nothing to do but be her bodyguard. “All right. Go, come back by noon tomorrow, and no fighting!”

Jack gave her a cute little scout salute and vanished again. Ren stared into the darkness where she’d been for a moment, thinking about Kirri’s threat to raze the Region. Of course, nobody would be killing Tora, but the threat had been… very convincing. Merlin, the immortal, had cooed over it as a sign of love, but the viciousness of it worried her.

“Serendipity?” queried Merlin, an odd note in his voice. “You’re frowning again. Why?”

Ren raised her gaze to sweep across her Servants. “I expect to let Tora out of her room tomorrow. We won’t hide that he gave us three days to return what was his, but I don’t want anybody telling her about the Avenger’s threat to kill everybody present.”

When Merlin smirked, she added, “You see that as proof of his love? But is it? Tora’s sister is here. Tora will know better than us if the threat is literal or hyperbolic, but I’m inclined to think anybody riding Lobo is not exaggerating.”

Merlin smirk faded into a frown matching her own, while Cú looked thoughtful and Jekyll grave. Ren shrugged. “I don’t want to put Tora in a position where she has to choose between her honor and her sister.”

She walked past them to the keep entrance and then turned back. “But do show off to her tomorrow. If she decides we can win, that will be helpful.”

Once inside the keep, Ren took a moment to lean against the wall. She hadn’t been frightened out in the courtyard, but she felt a delayed reaction coming on and she didn’t want to completely break down. So she pressed her palms against the cool stone wall and tilted her head back, focusing on the physical sensations instead of what had just occurred, and what could have happened instead.

A few moments later, Merlin strolled through the door with Jekyll. They walked past her and then Merlin glanced at her over his shoulder with his usual faint smile. “Did you finish getting Tora her second serving? No? Well, I’ll handle it. You and Doctor Jekyll should talk. He’s worked very hard today.”

Ren straightened up, noticing how Jekyll’s eyes slid away from her after only a glance. “Sure,” and then added, “Thanks, Merlin.”

Merlin only chuckled and went down the stairs, which first disappointed Ren and then left her uneasy. She looked at Jekyll again, taking a step toward him. The dim magical lantern hanging from the post of her bed way over beside the great hearth left his eyes shadowed—

“Survival instincts,” he murmured, and then shook his head and took a step backward.

“Why do you keep saying that?” Ren demanded.

His head moved as if she’d startled him. “Ah, my apologies, miss. I find myself… more distracted than usual around you.”

“You know, from anybody else that would be a compliment, but not the way you say it.” Ren spoke mildly in an attempt to tease a smile out of him. It didn’t work.

Instead he winced. “You are beautiful, of course, but… I don’t think he cares about that.” The second half of his statement was spoken in a muttered undervoice. Then he seemed to realize what he’d said and hastily added, “I’ve been studying the portal, miss, and I think that’s what Merlin intended me to speak to you about.”

“Hah,” said Ren, eyeing him thoughtfully as she crossed her arms across her chest.

“You did say it was a priority,” he pointed out nervously.

“Oh, it is. Hmm.” She flashed him a toothy smile. “I want to survive, after all. But that also means earning the trust of my Servants. Please tell me what you mean about my survival instincts?”

Jekyll’s mouth tightened. He turned away swiftly and walked over to a patch of moonlight cast through the window by the rising moon. Ren followed him, stopping a few yards away, watching as he raised his face to the light.

“You wonder if I’m _him_ , so you come forward to find out. A normal person backs away from the frightening, avoids the dangerous.” He turned his head to look at her from the corner of his eye. “You want to get closer to me, but Master?” His voice dropped. “You’re far too close already.”

Once again, Hyde sprang on Ren before she could blink, let alone dodge. But this time instead of knocking her down, he caught her roughly in his arms. His mouth covered hers as she inhaled to cry out, his tongue pushing savagely between her parted lips.

For a long moment after that, Ren found complex thought impossible. She knew what was happening, but first surprise and then _sensation_ overwhelmed all but her most violent instincts—and for some reason she’d analyze later, those remained untriggered.

Meanwhile Hyde kissed her thoroughly, his lips and teeth and tongue moving against her mouth like an invading army: hard and sharp and even soft by turns. It wasn’t the mauling she might have expected, had she previously thought about it, and that _also_ contributed to her surprised stillness. Eventually, he made a sound in the back of his throat and moved one of his hands down over her backside to the hem of her garment.

At that point, an acrid burning smell hit Ren’s nostrils, Hyde’s hand stopped and the kiss _changed._ The pressure of his mouth lessened but somehow the kiss became hungrier, needier, as if he wanted more from her than her passive acceptance. She responded instinctively: twitching a hand against his chest, leaning in—and he broke the kiss.

He lifted his head just enough to clearly meet her eyes for a few heartbeats. His hold on her tightened. Then, muttering “Oh my God,” he kissed her again, like she was air and he was drowning. It was strange and exciting, and this time she kissed him back, curling her fingers into his vest—but only for a moment. Explosively, he pushed her away: the drowning man rejecting salvation.

Ren stumbled backwards, trying to steady her breath and her whirling thoughts. When she finally raised her gaze to Jekyll, he stood calmly in the dimness, looking at her, his hands curled tightly at his sides.

“I’m more distracted than usual when I’m near you,” he repeated, as if nothing had happened. “He likes you very much.”

“Because I named him first?” Ren asked slowly. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips swollen, but she was confused enough about the second half of the kiss to go along with his pretense.

Jekyll shrugged, slipping his hands in his pockets. “If I understood him, I would be a different man. I don’t know that the _why_ is important. Not as important as making sure you understand what happened here.” Ren gave him a bright, inquistive look and he went on. “You were alone with me, without your Command Seals. If Merlin hadn’t crafted me a single-use Mystic Code this afternoon that allowed me to seize control…” Jekyll shook his head. “He would not have stopped and he would not have cared about hurting you. He has… he has…” His shoulders hunched. “I’ve woken to blood on my hands before.”

Ren’s brow furrowed. Something about what Jekyll said rang false. More than one something. She thought about his words a moment, came to several conclusions, and took a deep breath, starting with, “Single use?”

“Yes. He said he could make more, but only one a week without draining off more of my magical energy than can be… easily… replaced. So please, please _be careful_ , miss.”

Ren watched the tense, fair-haired figure in front of her. He looked both beaten and defiant. “Henry Jeckyll,” she said quietly. “Do you know why I allowed Hyde to kiss me that long?” His brows knit together and she went on. “Because I knew I was safe. _You aren’t my only Servant._ Merlin left you alone with me _on purpose_. Maybe because of that Mystic Code, maybe some other reason. But he knew I wouldn’t come to harm.”

Jekyll’s shoulders relaxed as surprise chased the defiant look off his face. “What are you saying? I don’t quite understand.”

Shrugging, Ren said, “I’m not going to be afraid of you, Jekyll, Hyde. I’ll respect your request for space when it’s convenient, but in return you have to accept that even if we’re alone in close quarters, I’m not going to end up as Hyde’s victim.”

He stared at her for a long time before finally saying, “If you have Command Seals ready, I can accept that. If you don’t… I can’t. I’m sorry.”

They stood in silence for another long moment, each watching the other. Finally, Ren said, with an effort, “All right. We’ll talk about this again later.” She _wanted_ to argue with him more, or to provoke him, prove herself to him, and _force_ him to believe her. But she’d spoken to him about _trust_ and she knew sometimes that took time to grow.

And even more importantly, she was _afraid_ , too. Not of _him_ , not the way he wanted her to be, but of that momentary closeness, and of waking up needs she didn’t know how to meet. It was a risk that might grow even more dangerous if she _did_ succeed in earning _trust._

Bad thoughts. She spoke instead. “Shall we talk about the portal now instead? I’m super eager to get that fixed.”

“Ah. Yes,” said Jekyll.“But I’d like a few moments to myself, please? Just to get my thoughts together.”

“Of course,” said Ren quickly, ignoring an irrational pang of rejection. “I should go find one of the others to act as chaperone anyhow.”

He gave her a small smile. “Thank you for…. Thank you.”

Blushing like an idiot, Ren practically ran downstairs.

* * *

After the young woman had left, Jekyll ran his hands through his hair and then carefully smoothed it down again. He straightened his cuffs, adjusted his gloves and thought about his observations of the portal room.

He _certainly_ didn’t think about why he was so out of sorts. That way lay—

 _You want her too, don’t lie_ , came the voice in the back of his head.

“I barely know her, and what I do know, I’m not sure I like,” muttered Jekyll. He cast around. Even with Serendipity’s departure, he felt eyes on him. Was the child Ritsu lurking somewhere? Or even that lizard that had vanished into the night?

 _Since when has that mattered for our lusts?_ asked the voice

Jekyll knew better than to answer, knew better than to engage. He found his glasses in his jacket pocket instead and put them on. Once they’d been reading glasses, but now, nearsightedness no longer a problem, he found them useful for seeing in other ways.

Hyde had him silent or arguing, though. _Anyhow, if you don’t like her, why try so hard to protect her from me?_

Jekyll had a number of ready answers for that. He could have restated his desire to protect _everybody_ from Hyde. He could have listed Hyde’s past crimes. He even could have pointed out the girl’s own strange, chilly strength.

But instead he found himself clenching his fists so tightly they ached as he muttered, “ _Because I won’t let you have her.”_ No… why had he said that? Had that been Hyde or him? Why couldn’t he tell?

It was the sense of being observed. It confused him. That was all.

Then, Hyde’s mad laughter echoing in his aching head, Jekyll finally raised his gaze to the high, shrouded balcony where Merlin stood, watching with glittering eyes.


	23. Jekyll Presents To The Class

Ren found Cú in the kitchen again, sharpening some kitchen knives while seated on the table. He glanced up as she appeared in the doorway and frowned. “Problems?”

Making a face, Ren shrugged. “What do you think of Jekyll at this point?”

A look of understanding crossed Cú’s face. “I think he has his uses, but I can’t speak to his compatibility with you. If it’s bad, he may be a lot more trouble than he’s worth.”

“I don’t know,” said Ren slowly. “It’s early, yet. But he doesn’t want to be alone with me right now without a chaperone or Seals.” She glanced down at her hand with the fragmented Command Seals. They hadn’t changed since she used the last one that morning. That morning? It seemed like days ago.

“I really hope these do come back like Ritsu said. Neither of the two I used yesterday have changed yet.” She couldn’t help giving Cú an anxious look.

He laughed out loud and then said, grinning at her, “You really are a strange girl. That look… I can’t quite believe it’s coming from the same person who insisted on walking unarmed into the lion’s den. Yes, my little Master, they’ll come back.”

“How can you tell?” Ren demanded, eager for whatever reassurance he could provide.

He put down his knife and whetstone, hopped off the table and walked over to her. Taking her hand in his and holding it against his warm chest, he said, “Because you’re my Master. It isn’t quite the same as at home, but I still feel it.”

Ren stared at his large hands covering hers uneasily, and remembered her thought, right after she and Merlin had crashed through the forest canopy, that she was the _bad_ kind of lucky.She tugged a little at his hand and he released her instantly. “Anybody you summon will crave your touch, and wish to touch you themselves, my lady. Even the brush of your hand through our hair reaffirms our connection.”

“ _Ah_ ,” said Ren, pieces falling into place. “And with Jekyll, I summoned somebody who can’t stand the thought of touching me.” She pursed her lips. “Maybe he’d prefer I send him back. Not that I know how to do that--I’m pretty sure it’s not like releasing a fish back into a river, Cú—but Ritsu might.”

Cú shrugged. “There’s always the old fashioned way.” His red spear appeared in his outstretched hand.

With a sigh, Ren said, “If it comes to that. Meanwhile, the portal _must_ be fixed so it stops summoning Servants with big warning labels all over them!” She finished less calmly than she intended, caught her breath and added, “So I need you to come chaperone Jekyll and I, or else he’ll spend all his time worrying about Hyde f—” she bit her tongue on what she’d been about to say and then, her cheeks hot, said carefully, “about Hyde being inappropriate. And maybe you could explain to him that, uh, just explain to him what you just told me.”

Once again, Cú laughed at her, and then held Gáe Bolg out of reach when she snatched at it furiously. “He knows, my lady. I’m sorry, I’m sorry for laughing, it’s just your expressions—”

He chortled again before getting himself under control. “I don’t think Jekyll ever had a warrior’s training, or experienced the intense bonds of brotherhood formed in battle. And that era he’s from… Jack’s from the same time, isn’t she? An era where they hid all their passions in the dark?” He gave Ren a keenly penetrating look. “Are you sure it’s the portal at fault for those two?”

Ren _wasn’t_ , but she also wasn’t about to directly admit that. “Yes! I mean, look, the portal’s broken and leaking, it has to be fixed, right? If you don’t like my plans now, you’re going to _hate_ them if I have to also deal with a new Servant every day.”

“Maybe the little miss could summon instead?” Cú suggested. “I know there’s a battle with her summons, but I think we could help out with that.”

After thinking that over for a long moment, Ren said, “I’ll think about that more if we can’t fix it. Now, please come on. It might as _well_ be you, because I bet you tomorrow’s cooking duty that Merlin’ll make you do the final magics anyhow.”

“Not a bet I’m going to take,” said Cú, with a disgusted curl of his mouth. “That lazy ass.”

“It’s your own fault for being so good with the runes, Lancer,” said Merlin cheerfully. “If you didn’t want to use them, you shouldn’t have learned them.” He stood beside Jekyll, who still seemed pale and unsettled.

Fiercely, Cú said, “Hah! Do you think I could have refused _her_? Or done less than my best? That woman could sniff out what she called _sloth_ a mile away. I’d just get settled in at a nice creek and *bam* she’d pop up out of the bushes and chase me all the way back to her lodge.”

“I’m she didn’t want you to get bored,” said Merlin comfortingly. “Young warriors with too much time on their hands do get bored, unless somebody keeps their lives interesting.”

“I _like_ fishing,” muttered Cú. “It’s relaxing.”

“Haven’t you ever heard that you can relax when you’re dead?” Merlin teased.

Ren kept staring at Jekyll as the two other Servants bantered over her head. She couldn’t help herself. He met her gaze only briefly before looking determinedly at Cú instead, but she noticed his gloves were rumpled and his hair fluffed up. He looked like somebody who’d been in a scuffle, possibly with himself.

“Enough,” Ren said abruptly, cutting off a whine from Cú. “Lead the way to the portal room, guys. This’ll be a teamwork exercise.”

They all fell silent and then, as Merlin and Jekyll moved out of the door, Cú muttered something she didn’t entirely catch about women and dashed after them. With dignity, feeling like she was herding cats or perhaps children, Ren brought up the rear.

The blue lines on the walls of the portal room flickered fitfully as they filed in. Ren stared at the swirling portal, with its darkening blue radiance. If the negative aura had begun pooling, she couldn’t yet detect it against the background noise of her own doubts and fears.

“Thank you for giving me this opportunity to speak,” said Jekyll, who had placed himself in front of the others like a lecturer before a class. “I am, as I originally mentioned, not precisely a mage, but I’ve managed to develop a few theories about the situation within this room all the same.” His gaze swept across his little audience, and Ren realized he seemed calmer like this.

“First: this portal is a natural occurrence, rather like a volcano. And I suspect what emerges in its natural form isn’t necessarily a creature. The magical structures in this room regulate and stabilize energy, and somehow, from that, the local Summoners call forth familiars.” He paused and then added apologetically, “I don’t quite know how. None of the elemental systems I understand seem to apply, so I’m sure I’m missing a lot of nuance.”

Ren waved a hand. “I probably wouldn’t follow it anyhow. Go on.”

“Yes, well. I have some notes on how the structure can be temporarily repaired. It’ll require daily maintenance but it would stop the energy leak. However… I couldn’t resist looking into how Serendipity is calling Servants rather than local familiars, and I think that’s possibly _because_ of the destabilization. So repairing it while maintaining the crucial destabilization could be tricky.”

Merlin, tapping his fingers together, glanced up. “My perspective is very different, but you could be right. We’ve all noticed that the Master-Servant connection is different here. Why do you think that is?”

And suddenly Jekyll wasn’t the lecturer, but the student presenting to the professor. He dropped his gaze to the floor as he thought. “Ah. The Holy Grail ritual that summons Servants was adapted from an older ritual. When rituals are adapted, new pieces are added and old pieces dropped. I think…” His gaze rose to fix on Ren. “I think _she_ is serving as an intermediary between the Throne of Heroes and the portal.”

Ren’s collection of knowledge regarding Servants and their stories was fuzzy on the details of the magic that shaped them, but this sent off vague warning bells. “You mean _I’m_ a Grail?”

Very slowly, Jekyll shook his head. “Not that. Or if you are, you’re an extremely stripped down version of one, limited to the summoning aspect. But if I’m correct, you probably have more influence over the Servants you summon than anybody else would without a catalyst.”

“You might say she’s a universal catalyst,” said Merlin lightly.

“Hah,” said Ren. “Or maybe there’s more going on with this broken portal than we know so far. I certainly didn’t summon Artoria or Lobo. I wouldn’t even know how to make a demi-Servant, or pseudo-Servant or whatever. I don’t even know how to make a _Servant_ , not on any kind of practical level. I’ve been bleeding into a portal and wishing. Does that sound like how a Grail would work?” she finished breathlessly.

“Lobo and Artoria are probably part of a different modified ritual,” said Jekyll cautiously. “I think they’re not factors in understanding what’s happening with us.” He looked between the other Servants.

Cú had been staring hard at Merlin for a long time now, Ren realized abruptly. She looked between the two of them nervously.

“How much of this did _you_ do, magus?” demanded Cú, and Ren’s nerves multiplied.

Airily, Merlin said, “As I’ve already told Ren, I wasn’t involved with her creation or her arrival here. I also didn’t give her those Seals. She came to me exactly the pretty package she is.” He then corrected himself, “Or more literally, I came to her, since I can already see those wheels of suspicion turning in your mind, Ren.”

Cú’s flat stare didn’t change. “Anything else?”

“Well, my perspective is so very different from the schools you and Jekyll have studied, so you see, it’s hard for me to corroborate everything Jekyll’s proposed. It _could_ be true. And if so, we’re all being used by some entity I’d very much like to meet. As I already told you.” Now Merlin’s gaze was as hard as Cú’s, and Ren felt like she’d found herself between two duelists about to draw blades. The pressure of both their wills crashed against her.

As she opened her mouth to complain, the pressure vanished as Merlin suddenly laughed, putting his hand behind his head. “The thing is, everybody always gives so much _weight_ to what I say that I’d really rather not say anything until I’m sure, you know?”

“That’s fine with me,” said Ren firmly. “I’m not interested in the theory. You can do that when I’m asleep. Right now I want the practical element: fixing the portal so I don’t have to summon something tomorrow or else lose my mind.”

Merlin smiled and Cú sighed, while Jekyll said hastily, “Yes, I’m sorry we went off on such a tangent. That… always seems to happen with me. But I’ve made some notes around the room with chalk, Cú Chulainn, and—”

The conversation dissolved into yet more magical discussion Ren couldn’t really follow, but at least this time they seemed to be _doing_ something as well. Sighing, Ren sat against the wall and tried to learn what she could _without_ interrupting them. Possibly, her life would depend on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning on posting a chapter tomorrow, and then moving to a 2x a week schedule moving forward, aiming for Monday and Wednesday, with occasional Friday stuff as the inspiration strikes me.


	24. Ren Hears Some News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was sick yesterday, and only got about a third of this written. I'm back today, though!. Next chapter: Monday.

Ren slept, dreaming of hands pulling her into darkness. When a real hand touched her shoulder, she flailed and jerked away, opening her eyes to find herself in her bed and Jack cowering on the floor. Dawn light spilled into the hall, dappling the walls. Ren blinked, frantically trying to reassemble how she’d gotten there.

It had taken the three Servants hours to adjust and repair the magic in the portal room. Ren had tried to follow along, but she just didn’t have the grounding in magecraft to really understand. Her one attempt to get them to back up and give her the basics was met with a flat refusal from Merlin, one so blunt and lacking in his usual playfulness that she’d been too astonished to argue.

Their conversation and the flickering energies made her sleepy, but she’d forced herself to stay awake and listen, trying to understand anyhow, just to spite Merlin. Yet when they’d finally relaxed as the blue lines of light stabilized and crawled up the walls again, she hadn’t even realized they were close to done. To make matters worse, Merlin had turned around and said, “Oh, are you still here? Poor little thing. Shall I put you to bed?” But she’d declined with icy dignity and gone to bed all on her own.

Ren rubbed her face, trying to shake off the sleep that kept trying to drag her down again. Her bleary gaze fell on Jack, and she realized abruptly that the little Servant was trembling as she cowered on the ground. Guilt surged through Ren, driving off much of her remaining sleepiness.

“Oh, Jack, did I wake up badly? Augh. I’m sorry.” She held out a hand to Jack, but the Servant didn’t come to her, hugging her knees tightly instead.

“You didn’t do that yesterday,” she whispered.

Ren stared at her helplessly. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just… asleep.”

“She hit me pretty hard our first day here, Jack,” said Merlin from the staircase exit. “I’d probably still have the bruise if I wasn’t me.”

Ren frowned. Had she done that? Oh yes, he’d come back from picking fruit and woken her by whispering in her ear. She’d been dreaming at the time, and not of something pleasant.

“Oh. I had a bad dream this morning, but not yesterday morning. That’s probably why.”

She gave Merlin a curious look as he said inscrutably, “Ah.” When he said no more she immediately became suspicious. But she decided it was a discussion for later, and not nearly as important as the kicked puppy look Jack still sported.

Ren slid off the bed and knelt next to Jack. “Listen to me, okay? I don’t want to hurt or scare you again, so next time wake me up by shouting at me from the other side of the room, at least until I get used to being here.”

Jack’s expression became more wistful than afraid. “I liked sleeping in your bed, Mommy. I thought maybe I could sleep beside you sometimes.”

“And there it is,” muttered Merlin, not quite under his breath.

Ren fixed him with a frosty stare. “ _Are_ you here for a reason or did you just show up to piss me off?”

“Aw, Serendipity. I always have a reason for everything I do.”

Cú looked in over Merlin’s shoulder and said, “It’s just sometimes the reason is to piss somebody off. Did you get some intel, Jack?”

Jack scowled at the other Servants and then flung herself at Ren, grabbing her around the neck and forcing herself into the lap Ren didn’t have while kneeling. Once Ren gave in and sat properly, Jack wriggled herself into place, pulled Ren’s arms around her, and stuck her tongue out at the others.

Cú ran his hand through his hair in exasperation, while Merlin said, “Yes, yes, we’re all very jealous of what little girls can get away with. _Did_ you learn anything?” He moved aside so Jekyll, coming up behind him, could also take in the scene.

“Hmph,” said Jack. “Lots of soldiers in uniforms in a walled town two Regions away. Maybe five hundred? And other people in fancy uniforms, with pets. Fifty? Harder to count. No airships, but some of the pets fly with their masters. Eight of those. People afraid of the ghost wolf they saw running through the town last night.”

“Any sign how well the lord fights?” asked Cú intently.

“Nuh-uh. But I heard some people in a bar saying nasty things about Tora, and then one of the summoners came in and they all shut up fast.”

His eyes hard and calculating, Merlin said, “Were they mobilizing for a march?”

Jack shrugged. “Dunno. It was night. After the bars closed almost everybody except the night watches went to sleep. The lord lives in a big house in the middle of the town, near the black pillar. He slept too. I watched him. I didn’t even try to kill him or anything.” She looked over her shoulder at Ren for approval, and Ren gave her a squeeze.

“Good.”

Merlin said, “I’m not inclined to wait two more days until he comes to us. Perhaps you could send her to finish the job tonight.”

Ren winced. “No. She’s my secret weapon.”

“Nobody will know what happened even if it doesn’t work, Mommy,” said Jack reassuringly. “Nobody ever remembers me if I don’t want them to.”

Shaking her head impatiently, Ren said, “I don’t want to kill him if we can avoid it.”

Cú and Merlin exchanged looks, while Jekyll gave her a faint, reserved smile and Jack sighed melodramatically.

“Very noble,” said Cú finally. “Uh, so is this going to be a regular thing, not killing people? I kind of need to know.”

Ren remained silent for a moment, looking in herself, and then decided to be honest. “I don’t know. I feel like a hero of justice would insist on that. But I can’t afford to let my urge to be… noble…” she gave Cú a sidelong glance, “get in the way of making a safe world for Ritsu. On the other hand, this Kirri guy… Ignoring what he said when possessed by Avenger and going by what Tora said instead, he doesn’t sound like a bad guy. He sounds like the sort of person I’d like to at least talk to once we’ve defeated him.”

Her brow furrowed as she looked between her Servants and she added, “Actually, I wonder… Merlin, why did you not want him to see Tora herself?”

Merlin met her gaze with his own clear, untroubled one. “Have you changed your mind?”

“Was it because of your romantical ideas?” Ren demanded.

“Ahaha, what a suspicious mind you have, Serendripity! There are at least a half-dozen other reasons, too! We didn’t want to look weak or afraid! It would have created conflict in Tora’s heart! It might have provoked Lobo to actually see her! Do I have to go on?”

Ren gave Merlin the hardest of stares until her stomach growled and Merlin said, “Ooh, that sounds bad. I bet if you eat something you’ll feel much better.”

They brought Tora and Ritsu to the kitchen for a shared breakfast of bread and fried pork and berries. Tora moved slowly, as if being possessed by a Servant had left her aching, and accepted the introduction to Jekyll with aplomb. She caught her breath when saw Cú, though, and blushed when Cú grinned at her.

“I should hate you, for you killed my poor Eleron,” she told him tartly. “But you didn’t kill me and you could have. Was that for Ritsu?”

“Nah,” he said. “I had no idea who you were at the time. I just don’t like killing women as pretty as you are unless I have to.”

That wasn’t quite how Ren remembered his story before, but Ren found she was so pleased to see the more flirty Cú her story bubbles had recalled that she didn’t mind.

“Is it impossible to resummon him? Your Eleron? Was that his name or his type?” she asked.

Tora blinked and, sounding just like her sister, said, “Wow, you really don’t know anything.” She glanced at Ritsu as Ritsu giggled, and then said, “His name. It usually takes a long time before a familiar can tell a summoner their name, but Eleron told me his on his second day.” She sighed. “Resummoning a specific familiar is the biggest selling point of the regulated portal in the Sovereign Capital. I’ve seen it work, but you saw what happened when I tried to use that mirror’s portal conduit.” She glanced down at her own hands.

Cú handed her a plate of food, and gave another one to Ritsu. “How about using the portal down the hall?”

Tora shook her head and ate a bite, swallowing before saying, “That’s… not encouraged. It can happen, but it’s rare. A summoner who tries is likely to end up dead or worse due to repeated attempts. And I wouldn’t trust that portal anyhow.” She gave a sidelong look at the foxette perched on Ritsu’s shoulder.

“It gave you all of your night lizards,” said Ritsu, sounding annoyed. “And Eleron, too.”

A dark look passed over Tora’s face. “…The first time, yes. But the Sovereigns ripped him away from me and only let me call him back once Lord Kirri claimed me. If I hadn’t known his name, he would have been lost forever.”

Ren frowned. “Ripping….? Was that different from Cú slaying it?”

“Yes,” said Tora flatly.

“Let the woman eat, Ren,” said Merlin. “You’re spoiling her breakfast. Plenty of time to chat later. We’ve got a couple of long, boring days ahead of us.”

But, as it turned out, Merlin was completely wrong. Shortly after breakfast, as Ren washed some dishes and wondered if she could also wash herself under the kitchen pump, Jack came running in. “Somebody’s outside the walls shouting halloo!”

“A villager?” Ren asked, perking up.

“Nuh-uh! A summoner!”

That sent Ren racing upstairs and out into the courtyard, where she skidded to a halt. She hadn’t been out in the courtyard since the night before, relying instead on the facilities accessible through a small door in a side hall between the kitchen and the portal chamber. And it had been dark and she’d been distracted then, so she honestly couldn’t say if the walls of the castle had been repaired overnight, or if Merlin had done it while she’d napped in the afternoon.

But the walls _had_ been repaired, and judging from the flowering vines cascading down the three repaired sections, it was very definitely Merlin’s work. The visiting summoner momentarily forgotten, she stared around. “Wow.” Then her brow furrowed. _Three_ repaired sections. There was no longer any place for a gate.

“Merlin,” she shouted, her awe forgotten in her outrage. “How are we supposed to _get out?”_

Merlin appeared behind her along with the others. “Ahaha, you noticed that, did you? Regrowing the walls was a lot easier than constructing and installing a gate, so I did that.” He preened. “And you thought I was a lazy good-for-nothing. But let me tell you, not just any mage could have regrown shattered walls over night. It took a great deal of cleverness—”

Ren stomped her foot as a voice caroled a greeting from outside the wall. “And what was your plan for when we need to leave the fortress?”

Merlin cocked an eyebrow at her, moved past her, and then turned and swept her legs out from under her in a princess carry. Before she’d finished shrieking and grabbing at him, he’d crouched and then jumped… all the way up to the wall-walk behind the battlements on one of the original wall sections.

Technically they went higher, and Ren had a glimpse of the forest beyond and some waiting figures, but other than a panicked moment where she though Merlin would _miss_ and they’d go over the wall, she’d _fall again,_ she didn’t really process the sight.

The Magus landed lightly on the walk and said after a minute of Ren clinging to him, her face pressed against his shoulder, “Ren? We’re here. I’ll put you down if you let go of me. Um, if this is your version of throttling me, I should probably get you some lessons, ahaha.” He shifted her in his arms so he could stroke her hair comfortingly with one hand.

Ren shuddered at the gentle touch and raised her head from his mantle to say coldly, “Put me down now please.”

Immediately, he did so. Her legs trembled, but she shook off his steadying hand. A distant part of her wanted to turn and hit him, but too much of her brain was occupied with reliving the jumping, flying, _falling_ leap, and the fall toward the forest a few days ago. She forced herself to look over the battlements at the land beyond and promptly swayed as vertigo overwhelmed her.

Once again Merlin caught her arm and when she tried to shake him off, she staggered instead. He put her hands flat upright part of the battlements and said, “Oh, two of the Seals are back. Look at that. How pretty.”

She felt the solid stone under her hand, and opened her eyes. Indeed, part of the Command Seal design had restored itself. It _was_ a pretty design, with curly parts and little flares. The overall shape reminded her of a shield.

A pair of thumps down the wall broke through her intense concentration on the magical glyph and she looked sideways to see Cú, holding Tora, and Jekyll, lowering Ritsu.

“What’s wrong?” said Cú tightly.

“Just a little acrophobia,” said Merlin. “She’s all right.”

“Move,” said Jekyll, his voice chilly. Merlin obediently moved aside and Jekyll took his place beside her. “We’ll find another way for you to get down, miss,” he said, much more gently.

A little warning bell went off in Ren’s head. She raised her gaze to Jekyll’s and saw a reddish glint in the turquoise eyes. A secret smile flashed across his face before it returned to sober concern.

Ren shivered, suddenly desperately wishing she had at least one companion she _could_ trust. But even Cú unsettled her, if for different reasons than the rest.

That led her to realizing she hadn’t felt the miasma from the portal yet that morning, and that in turned recalled to her the summoners waiting outside. As Tora said grimly, “I know them,” Ren raised her eyes to look over the wall.

This time the vertigo wasn’t as bad. As long as she didn’t look directly down or think about falling, she could… look. Think a little.

Two people, two creatures. One of the creatures was as long as a man, with a fluffy white mane, a hairless purple body, short legs and a long snout, while the other was a big blue dragon. The dragon was far larger than Tora’s had been, with what looked to be perfectly functional wings. Its summoner, a woman with long silvery hair, sat on a saddle on its back. A bow was strapped to the saddle.

The figure beside her was androgynous, and had body, limbs and even lower face wrapped in indigo blue fabric that reminded Ren of the night-colored light of the corrupted portal. They had three knives at their waist, two long ones and a small one.

“Who are they?” Ren asked Tora.

“The archer is Shina, and the one with the knives is Blue Violet,” said Tora, despair in her voice again. “Two of Lord Kirri’s lieutenants. Either of them is worth ten of me. I’m sorry.”


	25. Ren Faces Her Fear

The long-haired woman mounted on the big dragon stood gracefully in her saddle and her voice carried to the ramparts. “Look, Blue, they finally appear. How annoying. If they’d fled like rats we could have ended this immediately.”

The slender figure wrapped in violet cloth said something muffled by their mask and, somewhat to Ren’s surprise, the long, low figure beside the human stood on its hind legs, laughing like a person.

“What _are_ they?” asked Ren softly.

“Shina has a rain dragon. They’re invisible in the sky,” said Tora, her voice flat and chilly. “Blue Violet partners with a lionbolt. They fight together. The lionbolt is very intelligent.”

Shina raised her voice. “Hail to the fortress of fools! Our Sovereign Lord Kirri Zamaran bid us come and make ourselves known to you, so that you might understand how useless the pathetic protections of the Summoner’s Castle are now that you have stolen Lord Kirri’s—”

“Eh?” Merlin bellowed, cupping an ear. “I can’t hear you! Come closer.”

The rain dragon shifted as if to move closer, lifting a foot as Shina reseated herself in clear frustration. But Blue Violet flung out a hand to pause the dragon’s movement, and then gave a mocking salute to Merlin. This time when they spoke, their whispery voice seemed to come from the midst of the group on the rampart.

“Heheh, well, you’ve heard enough. If you decide to surrender before Lord Kirri arrives, we will be merciful.”

Startled, Ren looked around, but Jekyll shook his head. “A voice throwing trick only.”

“Oh.” She frowned, looking down the long narrow wall-walk. Not only did could she fall by stumbling a few steps to the left or right, she felt intensely exposed to Shina’s bow. It messed with her head. “I need to get down from here.”

A too-long beat of silence and Ren glanced up to find Jekyll and Cú having a staredown over her head. Ren shook her head and said to Jekyll, “You didn’t want to be this close to me, remember? Everybody go down the way they came up.” Her gaze went to Merlin, loitering in the background while looking out the Sovereign lieutenants. Grimly, she said, “Let’s get this over with.”

Surprise flickered across the mage’s face before he quickly covered it with a smile and moved to her, elbowing Jekyll away from her. “Sure thing. Just hold onto me.” And he stood absolutely still, without grabbing her, like waiting for attention from a skittish animal.

Honestly, Ren would have rather he’d just grabbed her and jumped again. At least it would have _already_ been over, and she’d be on edgeless ground again. But she could appreciate him learning from mistakes, too. Unless—

“Are you making fun of me?!”

Once again his eyes widened, and then crinkled at the corners. “Well, _now_ I am. Put your arms around my neck and close your eyes, and I’ll make it easy for you.”

She did it. Thinking would only complicate things. As she slid her arms around his neck, his hands closed around her waist and she shut her eyes. He lifted her what felt like only a few inches from the stonework; a sweet smelling breeze filled her nose with the scent of lilacs, and Merlin set her down again, whispering, “And we’re down.”

Ren flexed her toes and opened her eyes and to her great surprise, Merlin had said nothing but the truth and she felt better immediately seeing the tall walls rising around her. It was irrational; the archer rode a dragon who could easily fly over the walls, but nonetheless, the currents of fear muddying her thoughts faded away.

As Cú landed behind her and released Tora, she turned to him. “Cú, I want you to go out on your own and talk to them. I want you to try to get a sense of how strong they are without revealing just how strong you are. As for everybody else… I’ll make breakfast and we can work on repairing more of the fortress. Reactivating that protective invisibility thing Saber Artoria Alter broke would be golden, even if it’s too late in the current circumstances. So would protecting the Great Hall from rain.”

* * *

It was those words ‘get a sense of how strong they are’ that caused the trouble, Ren decided later. Cú had gone out once immediately in the spirit of polite parley, just to confirm the introductions and that their presence was meant as a kind of intimidation technique. Ren conceded the idea might have worked, if she’d had any story bubbles associated with the names that gave her a reason to be worried. But between Cú Chulainn’s legendary Protection from Arrows and his agility, she wasn’t intimidated, just curious.

So when Cú, reporting back, had asked permission to go out again later to evaluate their strength, she’d agreed without a second thought.

Always a bad idea, it turned out.

At least, that’s what it felt like when Jack appeared in front of her as she was sweeping out one of the mostly undamaged empty rooms and solemnly said, “Cú is fighting the other Summoners, Mommy.”

Ren dropped her makeshift broom and ran out of the fortress. The muffled sounds of clashing weapons bounced in from the forest, along with the intensified smells of roasting meat she’d assumed was lunch. A horrifying possibility flashed through her mind and she raced over to where Merlin had been laboriously, according to him, crafting a small door in his flower-covered walls.

The pale wooden door, decorated with strange symbols, stood open now and Merlin leaned against the wall just outside, flowers draping themselves around him like he’d grown there as he watched the skirmish on the far side of the clearing.

Shina sat sideways on her resting dragon, one bare leg crossed over the other as she leaned her chin on her palm: radiating boredom in every way except her rapidly moving eyes as they followed the combatants.

While Ren could see that Cú was fighting both Blue Violet and their lionbolt, all three parties moved too quickly for her to make out more than blurs at first.

“They started slow,” said Merlin conversationally. “Neither of them wanting to tip their hand, right? I don’t think they realize how fast they’re moving right now.”

The lionbolt fought on its hind legs, using its front claws much like its Summoner used their knives. Or rather, when the lionbolt was on the ground, it balanced on two legs, but it seemed to spend most of its time leaping around like, well, a tamed bolt of purple lightning.

“Cú’s not yet going all out,” went on Merlin. “He’s maintaining an edge on Blue Violet, just enough to keep the kid working. But the lionbolt is as fast as Cú. Easily. I don’t think those claws can get through his armor, but it’s keeping him busy and distracted, enough for Blue Violet to bring technique to bear against Cú’s raw agility. I’m not convinced the kid doesn’t have something else up their sleeve, though. I’d like to say Cú’s trying to provoke a demonstration, but honestly I think our Hound is just enjoying himself.”

“Why does it smell like lunch out here?” asked Ren, her gaze fixed on the blurs. If she squinted, she could almost make out what was happening.

“Oh, part of Cú’s plan. He offered them lunch in exchange for a bit of sparring. Ah, hm. Now what is—”

Ren caught a flash of movement from the corner of her eye and suddenly Cú and Blue Violet sprang apart as three streaks of light passed through where they’d been. No—Blue Violet had been flung backwards as Cú had used them to launch himself away, getting them both out of the path of the three arrows Shina had fired into the midst of the melee.

“Hah,” said Shina smugly, lowering her bow. “I thought so. He’s just toying with you, Blue. You should be insulted.”

The lionbolt laughed again as it flowed over to its master, while Blue stood up. “Instead I’m only hungry.” They gave an odd bow to the crouching Cú and walked over to where a sack sat on a rock and pulled out a platter full of roast pig.

Cú stood as well, a nasty smile on his face. “Is that how you normally fight, woman? Firing into other people’s battles, risking your own allies?”

Shina snorted. “Risking my own allies? You surely know better than that. Oh, yes if I could have killed you, I would have, but I also would have been sorely disappointed. Are you one of the mirror fusions? Not that it matters. I’ll still have the pleasure of watching my lord squash you like a flea.”

“Cú!” called Ren, before she could stop herself. They all glanced at her, and then Cú jumped to her side, placing himself between her and the archer and sort of shooing her back inside.

“What were you about, magus, letting her out here?”

“Oh, you mustn’t ever rely on _me_ for that, Hound. Not now. She made her wishes _quite_ clear about that,” Merlin responded, with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes this time.

Ren stepped back through the door, pulling Cú after her. “What was that about?” she demanded.

He grinned and shrugged. “You wanted me to test them. So I did.”

Scowling, Ren said, “I didn’t want you to—but never mind. Did you _learn_ anything?”

Cú’s grin faded. “We both held back, my lady. No—all three of us, the archer most of all. When she is in the sky, I would have you safely under cover.”

“But she’s confident her lord will be your match,” said Ren tartly. “She expects you to exceed her and she doesn’t care. I don’t like that.”

“You worry too much,” said Cú bluntly. “You want to do this the hard way, and I’m game for the challenge, but you shouldn’t forget there’s an easy way too.”

“They won’t yield before their lord does,” said Merlin unexpectedly. “They’re both prepared to die just to buy him time, if he asked it. And as Shina demonstrated, they’ll interfere, too. If you’re expecting the Hound to duel Kirri to a standstill, you’ll need to plan around that.” The smile Merlin gave Ren was almost cruel in its coldness. “Luckily, you’ve several options there, including the one in the basement.”


	26. Ren Explores The Keep

Unready yet to commit to a plan for dealing with Lord Kirri and his lower-case servants, Ren put everybody back to work on repairing the fortress. She set Jekyll to work with Ritsu on trying to reactivate the fortress’s invisibility shield—not something she had strong hopes for, but it seemed like the theoretical work that Jekyll excelled at, and Ritsu’s luck couldn’t hurt. Jack she assigned to help Merlin with the masonry reconstruction, because Jack’s Merlin Resistance seemed to be at least A-rank.

Cú she let choose his own task, asking only that he avoided fighting and that he spent time with Tora, encouraging her to believe they could win. He grinned at Ren, and invited Tora to help him clean out one of the outbuildings. Tora had agreed, her dull resignation temporarily receding at the thought of spending time with the warrior she so clearly admired.

As for herself, Ren finished her sweeping and then spent some time roaming through the fortress alone. She peeked in on the portal chamber, where Jekyll and Ritsu sat together with her storybook and a notebook Jekyll had manifested. She judged from Jekyll’s guilty look that he hadn’t made any progress on his _assigned_ task but had definitely found something that interested him. Ritsu’s foxette dozed beside her knee while Ritsu chattered cheerfully, her gaze fixed on Jekyll’s handsome face.

Wondering how Jekyll would cope with a young girl’s crush, Ren returned to exploring. She cataloged the other accessible rooms in the underground part of the fortress and then worked on getting to the upper levels. She found a gallery around the Great Hall that she could access by climbing over some fallen rubble, and by going up further managed to make her way onto the roof of the Great Hall where it extended out past the keep’s central tower.

From there she could see not only where Merlin and Jack worked in the courtyard, but the top of the ramparts. To her very great surprise, she wasn’t nearly as afraid of the drop as she’d been out on the wall. She didn’t want to sit on the edge kicking her feet or anything, but she could be _aware_ of the drop without a trembling in her limbs or a clouding of her thoughts.

Merlin’s reconstruction work involved a lot more drawing on the stones and a lot less heavy lifting than she’d imagined. Jack mostly sat on tumbled masonry watching him, except when she trotted acreoss the courtyard to tuck a flower between some blocks at Merlin’s behest.

Ren couldn’t see Cú and Tora anywhere, nor even tell which of several outbuildings they’d decided to work on. She frowned, circling the central tower to inspect the far side of the keep, careful to test each step. It was a slow, mindless trip and she worried at the problem of _not_ just killing her enemies as she went.

The biggest problem, she decided, was Jekyll. From what Ren knew of his parameters, he—or at least Hyde—could easily keep Blue Violet and their lionbolt occupied. He might even do better than Cú at fighting both of them at once. And Jack and Merlin could probably handle Shina the archer and her dragon, potentially non-lethally, which would allow Cú to face the Avenger-powered Lord Kirri.

Ren would have to pay the cost afterwards, of course. With her bracelets, handling Cú and Jack would be feasible. But she hadn’t even picked up Jekyll’s bracelet from Merlin yet, and being close to him had… risks, even if he’d allow it.

Merlin was technically correct in pointing out that she could always call yet another Servant from the portal. The thought filled her with dread, though. Without looking too closely at the story bubbles that still made up most of her memories, she knew there were plenty of other Servants she could summon that would demand much more of her. Vampires and stalkers and _idol singers_ lurked in the depths.

But strategy demanded she choose at least one of the three to accept: sending Jack on a murder spree; draining Jekyll and Hyde to the point that they needed recharge from her; or summoning more allies.

Cú and Tora weren’t around back, either. Old fruit trees clustered around two outbuildings, but there was simply no sign of them or their efforts. Strange. Ren hesitated, and then reached out along the mental channel Cú had once spoken to her on.

_Cú? Where are you?_

A pause, and then: _Ah—give me a minute, my lady?_ He sounded… odd.

Ren frowned and reached out again. _What are you—_ Suddenly her knees gave way beneath her as what Cú was experiencing slammed into her, taking over her senses and running through her nerves.

 _He was in the darkness of one of the outbuildings in the little orchard, and the sweet old smell of ancient apples mingled with the scent, the_ taste _of Tora’s skin. He had her pressed against the wall, her clothing half-removed, her hands tangling in his hair as she moaned. His own hand cupped one of her breasts and he’d been kissing her neck when Ren had called for him._

Ren clutched her head as Cú’s arousal raced through her own body. Falling back on the Great Hall roof, her hand went instinctively to her own breast. Then, as the vision’s immediacy ebbed, and embarrassment took its place, she gasped, “ _No._ Never mind. I didn’t want anything important…”

But before she’d finished, Cú had materialized on the roof not two meters from her. “My lady, why are you up—” He didn’t have a hair out of place, but his usual garb was a skintight reinforced bodysuit. As her fevered gaze swept down his body, he looked her over, said, “ _Shit_ ,” and tooik an involuntary step backward. “My lady—”

“Sorry,” Ren mumbled, trying to gain enough control of her body to at least sit up. “I kinda got an eyeful. Mindful. You should hang out a Do Not Disturb sign…”

Something flickered on Cú’s face and then he was kneeling beside her, picking her up. “Never for you, my lady. You’re my entire reason for existing here.” As he stood, he said, “I’m sorry I didn’t shield you from that, though.”

Ren tried to struggle but only managed to squirm against his chest instead. His hot, muscled, hard chest. Every inch of her suddenly hypersensitive skin demanded to be pressed against him. “This… isn’t really helping.” She gave him a half-hearted glare. “I don’t have your super-human body control, you know.”

Cú chuckled as he carried her to the stairs. “I know. But if I’m going to have to fight you off, I’d rather not do it on a roof, especially given how unstable you were on the wall this morning.”

Ren couldn’t help asking wistfully, “Do you have to? Fight me off, I mean?” as they arrived in the Great Hall after a few short leaps. But when he set her on her bed, she didn’t cling to him.

Something sparked in his eyes as he looked down at her,and then he gave her a twisted half-smile. “Yes.”

“That doesn’t seem very like you,” she said reproachfully, but straightened up as her hormones finally started settling down. “Why?”

He crouched down and she suddenly had the impression of an adult kneeling to talk to a child. “I prefer my sex uncomplicated, my lady, and you have plenty going on already. Less annoyance if I find my fun elsewhere.”

It didn’t feel like the complete truth, but there was enough that Ren frowned. “You consider Tora uncomplicated? Even with me hoping to recruit her Lord?”

Cú shrugged. “She’s willing and interested right now, I don’t think she’ll be clingy later, and there’s no other loyalty between us. As for her Lord… If he has feelings for her, she’s clueless. If Merlin’s right, that’s her Lord’s problem, not mine. But Merlin lives in fairy tales.”

A nagging thought surfaced. “Uh, did you leave her without—”

A grin tugged at his mouth. “Since you didn’t have an emergency, no, I didn’t vanish without a word. You know, my lady, if you’re this interested, I could warn you next time and you could use that little power you’ve unlocked to ride along.”

Ren turned crimson all over, even more embarrassed by the suggestion than by what she’d already witnessed. She puffed out her cheeks and then abruptly buried her face in her blankets. When Cú queried, “My lady?” in an innocent voice, she waved her hand at him without lifting her head.

“You just… go away,” she mumbled. The blankets pressed to her face almost entirely stifled her words, but Cú must have got the gist anyhow, because he laughed, tousled her hair, and vanished.

Ren rocked back and forth for a few moments, trying to tame her rampaging emotions. How old _was_ she, anyhow? She had no idea. When she looked at Ritsu, she felt like a responsible adult. But Cú and Merlin could both reduce her to a blushing teen with just a few words. It was ridiculous.

As she calmed down, it occurred to her that maybe it wasn’t her, it was _them_. Maybe this was an undocumented Noble Phantasm they’d perfected. She was just a victim, really. She’d have to be much more careful.

To distract herself further, she thought about the ability to connect to Cú, and wondered if she could reach out to her other Servants the same way. After a few moments of thought, she decided to experiment, starting with Jack.

 _Mommy?_ Jack was seated on a fallen stone, listening to Merlin as he rambled about some fairyland he’d visited while marking circles on a crumbling wall. Just looking at him made her kind of irritated and hungry, but she was enjoying the rain-scented breeze on her skin, and the thought of taking a nap later. She kind of wished she had something else to do, though…

_I’m just checking in. Jack… why don’t you ask Merlin to give you some of that chalk? You’d like to draw, wouldn’t you?_

_Okay, Mommy_. Jack bounced to her feet and marched over to Merlin. “Mommy says give me chalk, too. Or else.”

Merlin blinked up at Jack and then grumbled, “Fine, fine.” He gave her the piece of chalk he’d been using. “Just… do your drawing over in the center of the courtyard, please.”

Ren smiled and pulled her attention away. She spent a while thinking it through before reaching out the same way for Jekyll. It felt risky but it would be better to _know_ now rather than find out later.

For a moment, she saw Ritsu’s beaming face through Jekyll’s eyes, heard the echo of Jekyll’s gentle laugh in her ears. But abruptly, walls closed around her and she found herself in a parlour unevenly divided down the middle.

The side closest to the door was neat and orderly: sparsely furnished with a carefully sorted bookshelf, a marble-inlaid chess table with a game in progress, a green couch, an end table and a matching footstool. A spray of dried lavender in a cut-crystal vase decorated the end table, along with a familiar notebook. The vase sparkled under the bright gas light. A painted cherry blossom screen with holes torn through it stood at the edge of the clean side: a pitifully insufficient attempt to block the mess on the other side from the couch’s view.

The far side—the larger side—was dim and cluttered, lit only by a fire flickering in the hearth. Broken chairs abutted a lovingly polished ancient wooden table. Books were scattered everywhere: some torn apart, some facedown with their spines cracked, some yet to be opened. There were shelves, but they held grisly, organic trophies of dubious origin, along with dozens of blackened vials. Trash crowded the table: the remains of meals, old clothes, and newspapers—but thin golden chains, as for jewelry, cascaded off the edge of the table from under the mess.

Both sides were occupied, too. Hyde lounged on a worn red velvet chaise longue that had one broken leg held up by a stack of three books. He looked up from a naughty magazine as Ren materialized in the center of the room and grinned.

As Hyde bounded to his feet, Ren was suddenly yanked into the clean side of the room and propelled toward the door by a scrawny, small version of the real Jekyll. “No, no, no,” he said, panting at the effort. “Go, go, go! Don’t do this again!”

The door swung open wide. Ren found she could dig in her heels if she tried… but she did this only once before allowing Jekyll to kick her out of his head.

 _Well_. Ren huddled on her bed, recentering herself. In a way she’d expected that, but she hadn’t expected it to be so _real_. So visceral. She could still smell the fire, the dried lavender, the newsprint.

It had worked, at least. Now she knew. She probably didn’t need to test anything more. Merlin had already demonstrated his ability to come when called.

_I mean, why push things?_

The inside of Jekyll’s head had been so _vivid_ and detailed. She felt like she understood him better just from that glimpse.

 _Bluebeard_. One of the story bubbles in her mind popped and she saw the shape of yet another Servant she really, really didn’t want to summon.

Because Ren couldn’t resist. She sent her thoughts toward Merlin.

.

.

.

Nothing. No response. No connection.

Then he whispered, _Hello Serendipity_ and he was too close, _too close._ He was all around her, overwhelming her, his floral scent making her dizzy and breathless. She gasped and the sense of his presence retreated.

Then he was nothing more than a voice in her head. _Hey, hey, Serendipity. If anybody’s going to slack while everybody else is working, shouldn’t it be me? I’m pretty sure it’s in the contract somewhere…_

Ren wanted to withdraw and hide, pretend she had never reached out. She resisted. _Why can’t I see through your eyes?_ _I could with the others._

She felt a touch of that overwhelming presence again, just for an instant, before Merlin said, _Because I’ve become very good at keeping witch-queens and mage-kings out of my mind. Which is great for you because it wouldn’t be very healthy for you in here. Consider what I eat, Ren._

A hand brushed her hair away from her face and Ren realized she had her eyes squeezed closed as she curled around her knees. She opened them and Merlin stood before her, an odd smile on his face. “You do keep surprising me, though.”

Ren peered up at him uncertainly. “What, by reaching out? Nobody else was surprised… I thought it was a common magic.”

“For trained mage Masters with reasonable Magical Circuits, yep. But we’ve already established that you’re not that.” Merlin’s smile became his usual light-hearted expression. “But now I get to tease you about once again leaping before you look, so I forgive you.”

“Uh-uh.” Ren shook her head. “You can’t embarrass me today. Cú already took the gold.”

She realized as she said it that it was a mistake offering Merlin a challenge like that. Internally she cringed back, waiting for him to pounce, to give her his most teasing smile before saying something outrageous.

Instead he pulled a sad face. “Aww, did he? I wonder if he’ll tell me how?”

He watched her with anticipation, but Ren didn’t let herself think about what he’d suggested. Instead she thought very hard about the inside of Jekyll’s head, about the local warriors waiting outside, about Lord Kirri and Tora, about Tora and Ritsu, about a map full of black columns, and finally said, “You know, I think Jack may be messing with your pretty chalk circles. You should go check.”

“What?!” Annoyance flickered across Merlin’s face as his gaze went distant. Then he focused on her again. “Ahaha. Clever girl, making me look. Why don’t you put that mind to work figuring out a strategy rather than harassing hard-working mages like myself?” Without waiting for an answer, he vanished from the room.


	27. Ren Smiles

Later that afternoon, Ren went out to the courtyard to admire Jack’s chalk drawings. They were surprisingly ordinary: big and little stick figures holding hands against a city backdrop, with only a few stick figure corpses scattered around.

“Exactly what I hoped to see,” Ren told Jack, who beamed before scampering off to take the nap she’d been anticipating.

The outer curtain wall of the fortress had mostly been repaired, but Ren could identify the exact point, two thirds of the way through, where Merlin had gotten distracted by redesigning the courtyard instead. What had been an expanse of packed earth, ancient cobble and piles of rubble had been transformed into the skeleton of a garden. Unbroken stone walkways opened onto a central court that still had plenty of space for drills and inspections, but rows of not-quite-flowering shrubs set off the central area from, on one side, a grassy lawn that looked perfect for sparring, and, on the other side, a more extensive set of shrubberies including some berry bushes that curved around the side of the keep.

“What happened here?” Ren asked the magus, who sat in a wide wooden swing on the far side of the sparring lawn.

“It’s your own fault,” Merlin said, yawning. “You told Jack to go draw but there wasn’t exactly a good surface that I wasn’t already using. This was exhausting, too.” He yawned again, pointedly, and then peeked at her with one eye.

Ren still felt the lingering glow of her earlier triumph over Merlin, and it made her inclined to look kindly on his sulkiness. “Aw. It’s very nice, though, and if it wouldn’t be utterly useless to you, I’d even brush your hair.” She gave him a sweet smile before bending to inspect one of the shrubbery flower buds.

After a long silence, he said, “All right, I may have gone a little overboard. But this is not the reaction I hoped for!”

Ren glanced up, bemused. Merlin slouched in the swing, looking annoyed, so she tried again. “Hey, I said I liked it! It’s beautiful. And the walls are over half done. You worked hard. Take the evening off! I just wish I could help restore your energy.”

“You can, you know,” he said, barely audible across the lawn.

She was about to ask him what he meant when she met his lilac eyes and flashed back to lying almost nose-to-nose with him after they’d crashed through the trees together. She’d felt his breath on her face and realized what a dangerous, _attractive_ trickster he was…

“Never mind,” said Merlin abruptly, standing up. Then, in a very different voice, he said, “Eheheh, just thinking of your attempt yesterday.No good at all! Here, let’s finish up Jekyll’s bracelet. Have you decided on your grand plan yet?” He strode across the lawn to Ren’s side. “You’ll want to give us plenty of time to point out all the ways it can be improved.”

Ren scowled. This was her reward for trying to be nice, obviously. “I don’t think it’s going to be very complicated. Ouch!” she exclaimed, as Merlin ran his hand through the back of her hair, snagged a few hairs and pulled them right out. “You jerk! What happened to brushing out loose hair?”

“Your secret weapon is snuggled up in your blankets right now,” Merlin informed her, turning his attention to blending her hairs with the glowing strands of light he summoned from nowhere.

“So you just pull my hair out?” demanded Ren, now truly outraged. “What the hell is wrong with you? Are you that pissed that I didn’t yell at you for making a garden? Don’t worry, I won’t ask you to do it again.”

Merlin’s flashing fingers stopped moving. After a moment he raised those lilac eyes to hers. “Your first and second reactions this morning to my walls were perfect. I shouldn’t have hoped to hit that twice in one day.”

Ren tried to remember how she’d felt about the walls that morning, but that entire stretch of time had been overshadowed by the bout of acrophobia that Merlin had triggered. Annoyance that he treated her emotions like a game raced through her, followed swiftly by the realization that was certainly the intent of his words.

Without thinking, she reached out and grabbed him by the mantle, shaking him. “What is _wrong_ with you?”

“You already know the answer to that,” he told her, and fastened a yellow bracelet around her wrist beside the other two as she held his mantle. His fingers knotted the strands swiftly, and then lingered a moment curling against the back of her hand, as if he wanted to clasp it but wouldn’t let himself. “Now if you’ll let me go, I have some portal upkeep chores to get done.”

Ren relaxed her clenched fingers and Merlin immediately pulled free. She watched in frustrated confusion as he walked into the keep. She was still in the same state, although she’d moved onto shredding budding flowers, when Ritsu came out a few moments later, her foxette on her shoulder.

“There you are!” announced Ritsu. “Merlin threw me out of the portal chamber and told me to find you and get some fresh air. You folks are really wound up about fresh air. It’s like you don’t understand that rain and snow and lightning bolts and giant birds and big dragons come from the fresh air.” She looked around. “Wow. This is amazing. Is that a swing? Ooh, it is. Come on!”

Before Ren had a chance to say anything, Ritsu had grabbed her wrist and dragged her across the lawn to the swing, where she plopped down. The foxette scrambled off her shoulder and up to the top of the swing, where it sat up like a meerkat.

Sighing, Ren sat down beside Ritsu. “Remember if you want to thank Merlin, you should yell at him about messing up your careful piles of rubble or something.” She gave the swing a push with her feet and then pulled her knees up to her chest. “I can’t believe the famously lazy magus would rather go do chores than talk to me.”

Ritsu gave her an odd look, kicked her legs to keep the swing moving, and then carefully said, “You two had a fight?”

“I don’t know! He’s an alien. I was nice and he got mad at me.” Reluctantly, Ren added, “I knew he didn’t like being thanked, but he’s never been such a jerk before.”

“Hmm,” said Ritsu. “You know, you said the other day he lied and teased because he didn’t want us relying on him, but I wonder if it’s also because strong emotions taste better than weak ones?”

Ren blinked, turning to look at her, and Ritsu added, “Well, he doesn’t eat normal food, but he enjoys us enjoying our meals. He’s really very relaxing to be around when he’s not teasing, too.” She considered. “I think he’s almost always teasing you, though.”

“He does eat emotions,” admitted Ren. “From what I’ve heard, anyhow. But I can’t ever trust anything about that one.” She thought of what he’d said earlier: that it was good for her to stay out of his mind because of _what he ate_ , and thought as well of how, despite her words, she did keep trusting him. That was why his mercurial behavior had hurt her so much.

“Do you like him?” asked Ritsu, with her typical bluntness.

Ren clenched her fists as her face warmed. But she did her best to answer in a straightforward manner. “I don’t know. I… I want to, I think, just like I want to like Jekyll. But neither of them seem to _want_ me to like them.”

It was Ritsu’s turn to blink. “Is Jekyll mean to you?” she demanded. “How could he be? He’s _wonderful_. He talks almost as much as _me_ and he _listens_ when I talk!” She sighed dreamily. “I wonder when we can get married.”

“What?!” Ren spun toward Ritsu. “You’re joking, right?” The younger girl had a little smile but Ren didn’t know her well enough to interpret it.

Ritsu closed one eye. “Well… Maybe a little. I mean… there’s a lot going on, and I’m still a kid to him, and Tora would probably get even weirder. But he’s really amazing and he has such pretty eyes! They change colors, did you know?”

Relief and dismay mingled for Ren as she contemplated the topic shift. On the one hand, thinking about something other than Merlin was good. On the other hand, she didn’t want to encourage Ritsu to focus on Jekyll. “I’ve seen, yeah. Hey, speaking of Tora… are you two all right with each other yet?”

Ritsu grimaced. “I haven’t seen her much today, even once we finished our chores. Honestly, I don’t think she’s going to be all right until we sort out what’s going on with that Sovereign guy.”

Ren decided against telling Ritsu what Tora had been doing instead of spending time with her. “I’m sorry,” she said instead. “I’d hoped that she would have been more willing to fight for you.”

Ritsu gave her a jaded look. “I knew she wouldn’t, ever since she came back to the village. Chaldice may not have been very supportive of us, but the Tora who raised me wouldn’t ever have burned any part of it.”

“Chaldice… the village is named Chaldice?” Somehow Ren had never learned the village or the Region’s name.

Ritsu shrugged. “Yeah. We came here when I was a baby and Tora was about my age. Most of the villagers didn’t want us around, because Tora already had her summoner’s mark. But this old couple took us in and left us their house when they died. That’s why we took in other orphans that arrived.” She looked around. “They’ll really like it here, though. When do you think we can bring them?”

“Well, the outside is looking nice but the inside needs a lot of work. Don’t you want someplace other than the portal room to sleep? And I think the Servants should have rooms, too.”

Making a face, Ritsu said, “I think they’d rather be here with me than all alone in the village. Ichigo, he’s the eldest, he works hard, but he’s still a little kid. He shouldn’t have to be responsible for the others if it’s not an emergency.”

Ren looked at the adolescent girl beside her talking blithely of the even younger kids she’d chosen to care for, and shook her head. “Neither of you should have to be. Which is why _I_ will be. We’ll bring them over as soon as either the keep itself is repaired, or we deal with Tora’s Sovereign Lord, okay? Until then, they’re safer at the village.”

“I suppose,” said Ritsu. “Though really, if any grown-up is going to seize responsibility, I wish it was Tora. She made this mess, stomping in here with her ruffians.”

“You really blame her?” Ren objected. “You said she was originally captured by the Sovereigns. It seems like that’s where this all started.”

Ritsu shrugged tightly. “Yeah, but if she did take responsibility, even if it was really _stupid_ , she’d finally feel like _Tora_ again, and not this sad, pathetic copy of her.” She looked up as the foxette trilled on top of the swing.

“Yes,” said Ren thoughtfully. “I—”

“Hallooo there!” came an unfamiliar bellow from beyond the wall. Ren sprang to her feet convulsively and then ran to the little door Merlin had installed. He’d modified it since that morning, adding a window to the upper half of the door. The angle wasn’t great, but Ren could just make out a third figure joining the other two Sovereign champions. A third _mounted_ figure, cantering up to the scrubby little campsite.

“You’re late,” snapped Shina. “I thought you’d be here by noon.”

The mount circled the dragon: a creature Ren recognized distantly as a rainbow-colored kirin, with a mane and a thick, curving horn. It carried a large man in light armor, who had both a sword and a lance strapped to his back. And—

“Aw, I got lost on my way here,” said the man, in a deep, rumbling voice. “I’d still _be_ lost if it wasn’t for these two little ones I met in the wood. Apparently _they’re_ looking for a summoner too!”

—And two tiny children mounted in front of him. As the kirin pranced to a stop, the big man dismounted and pulled both the children down, holding one in each arm. “We’ll have to keep them safe with us for the time being!”

“Oh no!” said Ritsu from Ren’s side, in a voice of quiet horror. “That’s Pan and Lulu, the two youngest of my kids.”


	28. Ren Takes It Slow

At Ritsu’s words, it seemed to Ren that everything became bright and far too real. She looked between Ritsu’s pale face and the campside on the other side of the clearing, where the two small children let the big armored man hold them as they stared at the archer’s rain dragon. The man still spoke jovially, bouncing the two kids comfortably, but Ren could no longer parse his words.

She’d told Ritsu over and over again that her orphans would be safe if they left them in the village. Over and _over._ She’d said it. It was practically a promise.

Spasmodically, Ren pushed herself away from the door, and then snatched Ritsu’s hand to pull her away, too. “It’ll be okay,” she said. “I’ll _make_ it be okay.” She took another step backward and then turned away and flung a silent shout toward Cú.

Nearly instantly, he materialized before her, glancing once at Ritsu before giving Ren his full attention. “What’s wrong?”

Rapidly, Ren ordered, “Go right now to Ritsu’s house and check on the other kids there. Make sure they’re safe. Then report back. Wait! Where’s Tora?”

Cú hooked a thumb over his shoulder toward the keep, before dematerializing as Tora emerged. She looked around wildly, and then jogged over to Ren and Ritsu. “Cú said—what’s going on?”

Ren grabbed Tora by the arm and pushed her toward the little door. “You look out there and tell me how many more of Kirri’s elite will be showing up.”

It only took a glance out the window before Tora groaned. “Oh damn. That’s Theory. I thought—”

“ _How many?”_ demanded Ren, her voice like a whip.

Tora jumped. _“_ Um! Of the highest ranked, Theory is the last of his lieutenants. There’s about twelve more summoners underneath them.”

“And where did you fit in? Without any bullshit, please.”

With a sidelong glance, Tora said, “I could hold my own against the twelve when I worked at it.”

A tiny bit of the painful tension uncurled in Ren’s shoulders, but the world remained bright and strange. With a caustic edge to her voice, she said, “Do you know those kids the new guy’s holding?”

Tora peered more closely and then recoiled. “Is that—”

“Yes,” said Ritsu flatly. “Pan and Lulu. Lulu was just a baby when you got captured.”

With an anxious look at her sister, Tora said, “They… they won’t hurt them, Ritsu. I’m sure of it.”

“Would you even care if they did?” flung Ritsu. “You _burned houses._ ”

“Not _ours,”_ Tora argued. “Not even houses with lots of people, and I made sure everybody was out!”

Ren stepped between the incipient sibling war. “I don’t think you have any idea of what your Lord Kirri will or won’t do.”

Tora’s eyes widened, until the whites showed. “He wouldn’t hurt children. He _couldn’t_.”

Wonderingly, Ren shook her head. A distant part of her mind reminded her that Tora hadn’t heard what Lobo Kirri had said, but did that really matter? Given the presence of the orphans in her own home, she _had_ to know how children had already been hurt by the invasion force Kirri represented.

“He doesn’t have to in order to use them to his advantage, does he?” asked Merlin, materializing and joining them. “Not if simply holding them can be a distraction and a shield. By the way, those familiars can all detect us in our spirit forms if we get too close, Ren. Add that to your calculations.”

“Even Jack and Jekyll?” Ren’s heart jumped and rattled around, before settling again at Merlin’s shrug.

“I haven’t tested that myself, but I’d be surprised if they could. Of course, I’ve been surprised before here.” He gave Ren a look that suggested his previous annoyance hadn’t entirely evaporated, but she had no time for that.

“All right. Well, let’s make sure that’s not a surprise. Jekyll!” She didn’t raise her voice, but she wasn’t surprised when she felt his spirit form nearby. “Go eavesdrop on our visitors, please. Don’t get hurt, but if they detect you despite Presence Concealment, stick around long enough to see what they do.”

Jekyll’s presence swirled away and Ren turned her thoughts to Jack. But the little Servant was still enjoying a doze in Ren’s blankets and Ren had a strong foreboding she’d be putting the girl to work soon enough. Blowing out her breath, she said, “If we have to, we’ll just take them back tonight. Two Assassins and a Caster can manage that, I’m sure. And then we’re back where we were.”

“With a third body to occupy while you use Cú to beat the bad out of Kirri,” said Merlin dryly. “If you’re expecting me to occupy Theory—”

“I’m not,” Ren snapped. “You weren’t exactly—”

“Your crazy plan didn’t really—”

“—I didn’t hear anybody suggesting anything—”

“And yet this time—”

“—you might as well be—”

“—hahahaha—”

“—argh!”

 _“HEY!”_ shouted Cú as he materialized beside Ren and Merlin, and Ren realized she had Merlin by the mantle again and was attempting to grab that supercilious smile off his face as he held her away from him with one hand on her forehead. Meanwhile, Tora and Ritsu were huddled together peering around the nearest shrubbery at them in obvious alarm.

“Back to your corners!” Cú barked, giving Ren and Merlin both an evil glare. Reclaiming her dignity, Ren released Merlin’s mantle and jerked herself away from his hand, while Merlin shook out his sleeves and smoothed down hair that had fluffed out like an angry cat’s tail.

“Now,” said Cú. “Ritsu’s house. The younger kids are out in the clearing, obviously. The elder boy is gone. The elder girl is blaming me. She hid under the bed. I stuck a rune of protection on the door, so I’ll know if somebody tries to get in.”

“Where’s Ichigo?” demanded Ritsu, abandoning her fortified position and zooming back to them.

“I don’t know,” Cú said impatiently. “The girl wouldn’t talk to me.”

Ritsu pushed her hand against her forehead. “If the littles did run off to the woods to find me, he might have gone after them… but where is he now?” Her fear-filled eyes went to the door and the people on the far side. Then her pupils shrank to pinpricks and in a strangled voice, she said, “The summoning I messed up.”

“What?” said Tora sharply.“What summoning?”

“A little before Ren showed up, I did a summoning, but nothing came out of the portal… nothing but a _really_ bad feeling. But then Ren showed up and I thought I’d summoned her so I didn’t think about it anymore. Until later, when I wondered….”

“He’s probably just lost in the woods,” said Merlin reassuringly, clearly trying hard to pretend he hadn’t been acting like a smug asshole a few minutes ago. But after a furtive look ata still-glowering Cú, Ren resisted calling him on it.

“Maybe,” said Ritsu doubtfully. “Ichigo wouldn’t get lost in the woods by accident, though. He’s too careful for that.”

“I _told_ you that portal was dangerous, Ritsu,” said Tora furiously. “You could have _died_.”

“WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?” Ritsu’s sudden shriek echoed from the walls. Dashing tears from her eyes, she shook her head and ran toward the keep, the foxette galloping at her heels.

“You’re all a mess,” said Cú with a clinical detachment. “And now the neighbors know too. Come on, everybody inside, before the guys next door complain. Yeah, you too, my lady.” Cú’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t fight me on this.”

Begrudgingly, Ren turned away from the door and let Cú herd her inside. Inside the Great Hall, Jack had woken up and sat on Ren’s bed blinking in confusion.

“Go back to sleep,” Ren told her. “I’ll need you soon, so you have to get as much rest as possible.”

Jack looked at the others in the Great Hall with only mild interest before flopping over again, and Ren waved the others downstairs and followed them down.

She would have preferred to gather in the kitchen, but Ritsu had headed straight to her nest in the portal room and curled around her book of summoner tales. The foxette sat up on her shoulder, looking at the others with its head to one side. Ren almost went to her, and then stopped herself, looking to Tora instead.

Tora stood near the portal, hugging herself, looking at her sister. When she caught Ren’s glance, she muttered again, “She could have died.”

“Probably not,” said Merlin, still in his ‘reassuring’ guise. “That foxette was already with her.”

“Hah! That thing. I still don’t know how my brilliant little sister ended up with a _foxette_. Nobody ever won a battle with one of those, even a golden one.”

Ren wondered if people _did_ win battles with Tora’s little night lizards, which at least _looked_ even more insignificant than the foxette. Maybe they were more useful than she’d thought. But before she could ask, Merlin spoke.

“Yeah? I wonder how many battles they’ve lost, though.” Merlin flashed his teasing smile at Tora, who gave him a confused look.

 _Master_ ,said Jekyll, and then materialized on the far side of the room. He cleared his throat and said, “Ah. I’m back.”

Cú gave Jekyll a jaded look. “They stop talking when we started shouting?”

“They were quite interested in that,” admitted Jekyll. “When I withdrew, Violet Blue and the lionbolt had their ears pressed up against the wall. But the new champion, Theory, was distracted by the crying children.”

Ritsu looked up, her eyes flashing. “ _Why were they crying_?”

Jekyll wrinkled his brow at Ritsu as he squinted at her in a friendly fashion. “Because of you, Ritsu. They went into the forest looking for you, and as soon as they heard you so upset, they became both frightened and wanted to go to you.”

“Oh,” said Ritsu, digesting this unselfconsciously.

“He really did pick them up in the forest?” asked Ren.

“Unless he’s lying to his comrades, yes.” Jekyll met Ren’s eyes steadily.

She hesitated. “Do you think the kids are in danger?”

His eyes narrowing, Jekyll said, “I… _We…_ don’t think he’s going to mistreat them. He seemed to know how to handle them. But he didn’t argue when the woman implied their Lord would find the kids useful.”

“You keep looking for excuses to be that hero of justice, Ren,” said Merlin quietly.

Ren turned her head to look toward Merlin, although she didn’t really see him. She was remembering her very first reaction to seeing the kids with the kirin rider: the white-hot fury that he’d made her into a liar and that urge to throw everything aside to keep her promise to Ritsu. “Do you think I should simply ignore the kids?”

He didn’t immediately answer. She focused on him, meeting his eyes. Her skin prickled. For a moment, something alien and very old gazed out at her: something that only laughed and teased and complained to soften its inhumanity. Inhumanity—but not a _cold_ inhumanity. Not a machine. It felt almost—lonely? No… that was far too human for what looked through the magus’s eyes. Not lonely, but very much _alone._

Then his eyebrows swooped down and the window into Merlin’s soul closed. “Of course not.”

Ren, who felt like she’d been on the verge of an important breakthrough before the mage interrupted her, struggled first to hold onto what she’d seen. Then, as the thought broke apart like a fading dream, she tried to catch up to what they’d been discussing.

Kids. Sovereign champions. Ritsu and Tora. She’d come here to save Ritsu.

“Right,” she said, shaking her head. “Right.” For a moment two worlds seemed to overlap before her eyes, and then her fury at the kirin rider— no, at the _whole situation_ reignited and that deeper world faded away. “I’m looking for an excuse to _not_ rush into things, actually.” Darkly she added, “But you’d probably cheer me on if I shouted _Hell with it, kill them all!_ Even though that’s leaping before I look too.”

Merlin looked hurt and it looked _so genuine_. “I’m not the bloodthirsty one. I just want to help you win.”

“Excuse me,” said Jekyll loudly, if apologetically. “I do have more to report.”

Ren jerked her head around to give Jekyll her attention. Cú loitered near Ritsu’s nest, while Tora stared broodingly into the portal. “Yes, go on.”

“They didn’t detect me, but I was very careful. I think all those familars would be capable of causing damage to our spirit cores even when we’re in spirit form. They’re very much on the level of Phantasmal Beasts.” He took a deep breath. “And there’s something growing in the forest. Theory mentioned it, so I took a quick look before returning. I didn’t get too close, but I could _sense_ its malevolence… and its hunger.”

“Ichigo,” said Ritsu, her voice choked. “It got him.”

Ren stared at the younger girl for a long moment and then said flatly, “Merlin. Ichigo is the kid who pointed us at the castle. Can you see him with your Clairvoyance?”

“That’s not going to be useful,” he said regretfully. “My vision is pretty murky so far from my tower, and even if I do get a sense for him, it won’t be any reassurance of his _state.”_

“All right,” said Ren. “Tora, unless you plan on summoning something yourself, get out of my way.” She held out her hand to Merlin without looking at him, palm up, her fingers stiff. She felt him take her hand, felt the cool tingle of his sword’s slice and the ache of a re-opened scab, and she imagined his smug expression.

Tora said, “Are you—? Oh my goodness! I’ve been wondering…” She scrambled out of the way, finally joining Ritsu in her corner as Cú moved past her to stand protectively behind Ren. Merlin in turn moved to stand beside Jekyll, and Ren noticed distantly he _wasn’t_ smiling.

Blood welled from the cut and she caught it in her cupped palm, moving to stand right before the swirling blue portal. She concentrated, letting her fury at the situation fill her. At the moment, she didn’t care who she summoned, as long as they’d be her weapon—

Bluebeard’s story flashed before her.

No. Not _anybody_. No childslayers.

Somebody clever. Somebody who could plan. Somebody who would understand her rage and frustration. Somebody who would help her.

A more tactical version of Cú would be ideal, really.

She didn’t think that existed, but she concentrated on it fiercely, suddenly afraid of what she might summon instead. Why had she—

No. Focus.

Smart. Helpful. Tactical. Angry.

She turned her palm down and let her blood fall into the portal, repeating her request list under her breath like a prayer.

The portal’s glow intensified and the blue light acquired a golden tint as more blood dripped in. A flash of golden light and—

“What fresh Hell is this?” demanded the new Servant, his voice hard and clipped. The golden light coalesced around him, seeming to draw back into blazing eyes. He wore a ragged black suit, a black hat on white hair, and a red cravat.

Well, she’d managed angry, at least.

Ren stared hard at him, trying to identify his story bubble. Cú shifted his weight behind her, and the newcomer’s gaze went to the Lancer. His eyes began to glow again and he sneered. His oversized red cravat lifted as if in a strong wind. He looked like something out of Hell himself.

A story bubble popped, and Ren forgot to breath as she recognized the dilemma in front of her. He looked back at her and his own eyes narrowed as his shoulders hunched.

The Servant in front of her had a name. A name and a story of origin, and she knew them. But she knew too some of his later stories, and that as a Servant he despised the name he’d once used. Using it might provoke an assault like Hyde’s. Not using it… what would happen?

“Well?” he demanded. “Get on with it. You called me. You clearly have a use for me.”

Ren dug her fingers into her palm. Specifically, she dug her fingers into the cut Merlin had given her, digging it open further. Intense pain seared through her as her fingers slicked with more blood.

“I’m Serendipity,” she said. “And you’re the Count of Monte Cristo. Avenger.”

They stared at each other for a long moment, the scowl distorting his face slowly fading. When he finally spoke again, it was with a wry humor instead that biting, barely-repressed rage. “Well. This is awkward. Even a little embarrassing.”

“No contract?” Ren guessed, feeling giddy that he wasn’t attacking her.

“No. On the other hand, you’re not wrong. Hmm.” He stroked his chin and looked around the room. “Quite a crew you’ve got here.”

Then he shrugged. “Well, if we meet again and you’ve figured out how to make it work, I’ll work for you. I owe you that, and I always pay my debts.” He gave her a professional nod and vanished.

Ren didn’t wait for anybody to say anything, but lunged toward the portal, pressing her bloodied hand up against the tingling light. “I want an actual _hero_ this time, _please_.”

It felt like something bit into her wound and started pulling blood out of her. As vertigo swept over her, she whimpered—and then Cú yanked her away from the portal. Light once again flared, blue once again, as the babble Ren had wanted to skip rose around her: Jekyll worrying, Tora wondering, Ritsu explaining, Cú cursing, and Merlin—

—And Merlin was quiet.

The light compressed into a new figure. Smaller than the Count had been, and… jumping up and down.

Pink hair in a braid, with long bangs around the face. A partially armored tunic, or maybe a short dress? A white and red mantle. A sword on one hip, a tiny horn on another—

“Hi! I’m Astolfo! Rider, at your service! Who are you?” chirped the figure, and the story bubble in Ren’s mind corresponding to the name popped.

“Uh,” said Ren blankly. “Can you _do_ that?”

“Nothing stopped me,” said Astolfo reasonably, stepping forward and looking around the room before focusing on Ren. “I’d really like to know your name, though, or else I’m going to vanish again.”

“I’m Serendipity and you’re Astolfo,” said Ren, numbly. He’d just… _told_ her who he was. How…? But it was contained within his story, wasn’t it? What did rules matter to the likes of Astolfo?

“That’s right,” said Astolfo, nodding in satisfaction as lilac light flared around them. “I am. And now you’re my new Master. I hope we’ll have a lot of fun together!” He bowed, and when he straightened again. “Hey, that’s Merlin. Uh. What’s wrong with him?”

Frowning, Ren glanced over her shoulder. Merlin leaned against the wall, his staff loose in one hand, his face empty and calm as he watched them. If she didn’t know him, she wouldn’t have thought anything was wrong, but she _did_ , and his silence chilled her.

“Merlin?” she asked tentatively.

His eyebrows raised and then he said, “Come here,” in an emotionless voice, holding out a hand.

Jekyll inserted worriedly, “You know, that other Servant didn’t actually go back where he came from. He just dematerialized and left the keep.”

Ren heard that, nodded absently, filed it away,. She’d suspected that anyhow. But Merlin kept looking at her. Waiting on her. She hesitated, and then walked over to him.

He said, “My magic energy isn’t infinite. I wasn’t prepared for you to summon two, Serendipity.”

With a guilty start, Ren realized she’d _forgotten_ that Merlin had been backing her summon attempts with his own power so they didn’t exhaust her. When she joined him and he curled his hand around the back of her neck, she didn’t resist.

Lowering his head so he could speak in her ear, he said, “I said earlier you _could_ help me regain energy, remember?”

Ren pulled her head back to stare at him. She couldn’t… she knew… Confusion and guilt twisted her gut, and then irritation as Merlin’s lips twitched in a ghost of a smile.

“Well, _this_ is interesting,” announced Astolfo, standing close beside them, looking back and forth between Merlin and Ren. Ren, startled half out of her skin, jolted away from Merlin, toward where Cú and Jekyll conferred quietly.

Astolfo put his finger to his mouth and winked at Ren. “You can’t trust Merlin, you know.” Then he elbowed Merlin. “Let me handle this, big bro. You need her to smile, right? As I recall, there’s nothing like the cheerfulness of a cute girl to make _you_ feel better. You and Roland, two peas in a pod!” He cracked his knuckles and advanced on Ren with a rakish smile.

Merlin laughed weakly and slid down the wall until he was seated. “Ahaha, yeah. You carry on, Astolfo. I’ll be fine soon enough. This is just what I get for working _so_ hard.” He found a smile to flash at Ren, and it was positively _evil_.


	29. Ren Appreciates A Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to name chapters, for easier reference purposes for myself.

Ren found herself backing away from Astolfo’s grin and stopped herself. Astolfo, knight of Charlemagne, definitely qualified as a hero, but he wasn’t exactly an ideal Servant. Restless,bright, playful and troublingly independent; backing away from him could only lead to trouble later on.

Breathlessly, she said, “Now. Astolfo, I’ll brief you in a few minutes but first I need to deal with—Cú! There you are.” She bestowed a grateful smile on the Irish Lancer as he stepped to her side.

His eyes widened as he looked down at her. “My lady—” He shook his head, cancelling whatever he’d been intending to say. “You want I should go deal with the beastie in the woods?”

She wanted to hug him. Sensible, sane, trustworthy Cú Chulainn. She didn’t want to imagine where she’d be now without him. “Yes, exactly. Keep an eye out for the little boy, but let’s start by eliminating the biggest threat.”

His eyes teasing, he said, “You don’t want me to capture it, or tame it, or anything like that?”

Ren answered seriously, “Only if that’s easier than just destroying it. We have too much going on right now for games and I’d like this resolved as soon as possible. Lord Kirri’s due the dawn after tomorrow’s.”

With a nod, Cú vanished. Ren stared at where he’d been and then looked around. Astolfo now knelt beside Ritsu and Tora, looking at Ritsu’s book as the younger girl waved her arms and talked. Merlin still sprawled against the wall, his head down. But Jekyll watched her, his face impassive.

To him, she said, “You said the Count of Monte Cristo left, just as Ritsu’s nemesis in the woods did, yeah?”

Jekyll nodded. “He’ll need to acquire magical energy somehow, or he’ll disappear quickly.”

Ren found she didn’t have room to fret over what the Avenger might do to prolong his stay. “I doubt we’ll end up at cross-purposes. Uh, when you have the opportunity, will you think about ways to form a contract with a Heroic Spirit who rejects their True Name?”

With a twitch at the corner of his mouth, Jekyll said, “I’m a theorist, not a miracle worker, miss. But I’ll try.”

“Thank you. Meanwhile… I need you to come with me. Ritsu, Tora! Stay down here with Astolfo, please. Show him the kitchens. Get dinner started.”

Astolfo barely glanced at her, laughing at something that pleased him, but both Tora and Ritsu looked at her and nodded acknowledgement. She had the impression that both of them thought they were also being asked to keep the other out of the way and, well, at least one of them was right.

Now for the first step in getting Ritsu’s kids back: asking.

With Jekyll behind her, she went upstairs and over to her bed, where Jack dozed. Brushing the child’s hair away from her eyes, she said softly, “Jack. I need you to come be my secret weapon.”

Jack’s eyes fluttered open and she smiled. “I was just dreaming of you.”

Ren stroked her head. “Go to spirit form for now, and stay with me. Don’t let anybody attack me.” She looked over at Jekyll. “You too.”

After both Assassins had dematerialized, Ren ran her hands through her hair and straightened her clothes before crossing the Great Hall to the keep exit. But as she was in the midst of stepping outside, Merlin materialized within the frame, causing her to smash into him.

“Are you really about to go talk to the enemies at the gates with no more guard than two dematerialized Assassins?” demanded Merlin, with an apparently inexhaustible supply of irritation. Apparently he’d given up on the moment of normal behavior he’d displayed in the portal room. Maybe it had just been a show for Astolfo.

“I’m going through the door you made, actually, since there’s no gate,” said Ren impatiently. “You should dematerialize, too, and get back what energy you can.”

“I shall not.” Merlin’s blank face had the slightest hint of a scowl on his brow, and he stubbornly stood between her and the outside. She gazed at him for a moment and then sighed.

Then, gripping him by the mantle again, she pulled herself onto her toes to look him more in the face. “Merlin. If you’re as exhausted as you claim, don’t waste your emotional energy on me. I don’t know what your issue was earlier, but it was all a game, wasn’t it? You don’t care how _I_ react to things, as long as _somebody_ reacts.”

His brow furrowed more as he put his hands on her hips. “Ignorant, foolish and untrue.”

Ren gave him a skeptical look. “Then tell me why you’re acting like a grouchy bear, so my reaction can be something other than confused annoyance.”

Merlin’s hands slid up her sides to her ribcage and then he pulled her to him in an embrace so crushing her ribs creaked. “No,” he said in her ear.“You wouldn’t understand me if I did.”

Ren, less surprised but no less puzzled on this second round of Merlin hugging her, hesitated and then, remembering the previous instance, slid her arms around his neck. She could sense Jekyll moving restlessly near her in his spirit form, as if the embrace bothered him, but he was a problem for a later moment.

Instead she burrowed her fingers into Merlin’s hair and tugged lightly. In response, Merlin’s grip tightened further, until breathing was hard. His own breath rasped short and harsh in her ear. For a moment, an odd tension suffused Ren, as if she stood on an invisible precipice in a high wind. Her skin prickled all over.

Then, barely audible, Merlin said, “Remember what I am,” and slowly unpeeled himself from her before stepping away.

_Half-incubus?_ As Ren blinked and her mouth formed the words, Merlin pointedly looked away. “I’ll come with you. They’ve seen me before. I’m sure it will be refreshing, in a grim, depressing kind of way.”

“And that will get you out of this mood?” Ren queried hopefully.

Merlin glanced back at her. “You know, I’m going to remember later how eager you were for me to return to my usual state. Every time you sigh or roll your eyes, I’ll remind you. You’ll hate me.” This was delivered in a deadpan tone far removed from Merlin’s usual cheery speech, but suddenly Ren could see the link between the troublesome, familiar Magus of Flowers and this nearly-incomprehensible creature before her. The true Merlin didn’t display emotion as she understood it, but he still cared for, wanted, liked and disliked things. He could still suffer, be wearied, and enjoy aspects of the world.

Like pissing her off.

And, perhaps, hugging her, though she wasn’t quite sure about that. It wasn’t something she wanted to read too much into.

But the idea that not everything Merlin did was a lie or a game gave her a burst of unexpected cheerfulness that lasted until she approached Merlin’s door and saw the shadowy figures of the Sovereign champions moving around in the twilight. Then frustration and anger rapidly eclipsed everything else once again.

Merlin cut in front of her and opened the door, preceding her outside the wall. When she followed him out, he once again leaned against the wall, wearing the exact faint smile he usually wore.

There’d been a light argument in process among the champions when she emerged from the fortress, but it stalled out as they all turned to look at her, except for the two small kids rubbing their hands and faces in the mane of the lionbolt.

“Hey,” called Ren, getting directly to the point. “Kids don’t belong in this fight. Send them back to their village.”

Theory, the big kirin-rider who’d brought the children, said, “Ah, no, lady. I won’t be sending anything into that forest alone at this time.”

“I’ll provide an escort,” Ren offered.

“Where’s Ritsu?” demanded the older of the two kids, a little boy.

“An excellent question, child!” said Theory. “You see, they’ve come for a reason, just as we have.”

Ren ground her teeth together. “Ritsu’s inside the castle. You can join her if you want.”

And the little girl would have run to Ren at that, if the lionbolt hadn’t scooped her up in one of its human-like arms. Those wicked long claws seemed to be retractable, at least.

Theory put a hand on the boy’s head. “They cannot. What kind of man would I be were I to let children enter a structure soon to be demolished?” He smiled and his teeth flashed uncannily. “But you could let young Ritsu join us, and her sister Tora too, and then all children are safe and we go away peacefully.”

Shina, standing beside her dragon, added, “For now.”

“ _Shina_ ,” said Blue Violet with a sigh, and Shina only shrugged.

“Eh,” said Theory. “What do you say, lady? Nobody wants to see children hurt, but unless you surrender, it may be unavoidable.” He scratched his chin. “Or perhaps you think to come and take them in the cover of night? But that would be so dangerous for them. The act of an evil, selfish woman.”

Ren’s fingers curled into fists and her cut hand ached terribly. “And now I have seen what you are. A good man would return them to their homes before settling his quarrel with me.”

Without waiting for an answer, she turned and walked back into the keep. Merlin followed her, closing the door with a quiet click that was far more subdued than the slam she wanted.

Silently, Jack said, _Can we just take them? The baby girl is so cute, like a doll._

_“_ We will. Wait!” Ren thought past the fury for a moment. “Not until Cú is back, though. If it turns into an all-out brawl, I want everybody present and ready to go.” She eyed Merlin, who had let his smile vanish. “Even you, if possible.”

“You surprised me, you didn’t kill me. If you could manage sit very still for a few hours and refrain from causing trouble, I’d be as fresh as a daisy.”

Ren pursed her lips, momentarily distracted. “Does briefing Astolfo count as causing trouble?”

Merlin only gave her an impassive look so tempting that she reached out to push up the corners of his mouth with her pointer fingers. His face seemed carved of stone, though. While she struggled with this, she said, “Jack, until we’re ready to retake them, stay near those kids. Anything hurts them, you take it out and let me know.”

_Right, Mommy! Nobody steals my dolly!_

Ren returned to tugging on Merlin’s stone face. His lips twitched, and encouraged, she ran her fingers across them.

Instead of smiling, he said only, “Bad, bad Ren. You have a memory like a sieve. Go speak with Astolfo. Hey, Jekyll, stay with me.”

Ren stepped back, putting her hands behind her back. Once again, the vague cheer brought on by harassing Merlin faded away and her fury at the champions outside resurfaced. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling, not while all she could do was wait and plot. She spent a moment with her eyes down, trying to wind up the rage like a ball of yarn and tuck it away where she could gather it again, but that left her feeling off-balance and worried about more bizarre things, like talking to Astolfo.

She found him downstairs in the kitchen despite her reservations, making a mess with a frying pan with Tora and Ritsu. With a wince at the chopped vegetables jumping from the frying pan to the fire, she greeted them.

“Rendidi!” said Astolfo, abandoning the pan, leaping over the table and landing in front of her.“Toratora and Riritsu have been telling me all about this wonderful adventure you’ve summoned me into. I was wondering if you’d mind if I took my Hippogriff and went exploring some? You could come with me!”

Ren blinked at Astolfo’s ideas of nicknames before saying, “Normally all I’d care about is the mana cost, but I don’t want the guys outside to know you’re here until the last minute. Uh, did they explain about the mana?”

Astolfo winked at her, swinging his braid over his shoulder. “Riritsu did! Hippogriff _is_ a little expensive, which is why I thought I ought to talk about it with you first. Who are these guys outside?”

“Enemies.” Eyeing what theoretically would eventually become dinner, Ren added, “Uh, why don’t you come with me and I’ll tell you more? We can go to the roof of the keep.”

“Yes, yes, good idea. I’d like to see more of this place.” Without a glance back at the mess he’d made, Astolfo bounded out of the kitchen. After she gave Ritsu and Tora an apologetic shrug and Ritsu laughingly waved her away in response, she followed him.

On the roof, Ren spent a while answering some surprisingly perceptive questions as best she could. She didn’t entirely notice when Astolfo’s questioning veered first onto herself, and then onto the other Servants. All she noticed was that by the time Tora called them for dinner, she felt like she’d been talking a long time to a surprisingly good listener and yet couldn’t recall exactly what she’d said.

It was after a dinner where everybody, even Astolfo, was occupied by their own thoughts that Ren started wondering what was keeping Cú. She didn’t reach out for him, though, because what if he was fighting even then, and she distracted him at a crucial moment? She trusted him absolutely. If he hadn’t returned yet there was a good reason for it.

That’s what she told herself as she prepared to rest that evening. Once he returned, they’d have a new task and she needed to be fresh.

It didn’t occur to her until later that Cú’s _good reason_ for not returning might turn out to be very bad indeed.


	30. Hyde Steps Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ren went to sleep waiting for Cú's return. Something happened while she slept...

Later, all she could recall was that she reached out from a nightmare in her sleep, and a greater nightmare descended upon her world, bringing blood and guilt and sacrifice. Sacrifice, but not of herself: a sacrifice she’d have to live with, unless she was too weak.

Her world was far darker than she’d imagined it could be.

Eventually, she would recall the terrible choice she failed to make, and then the devastating taste of utter defeat.

And in the end, she would wonder about the price you paid for luck.

But for now, she slept, and recalled nothing at all.

* * *

_Save us this time, Mommy?_

* * *

_No, no, no. Strike that. Bad idea._

_Although._

_Maybe you can bear it without going mad._

_It weaves its chains with our own power, and you have none._

_Serendipity_

_Open your eyes again._

* * *

Hyde paced back and forth in front of the bed where Artoria Alter had placed the children and the Master. They were all that was left and—well, they weren’t very much. “Come on, come on, come on, wake up!”

There she was. Right there. The Master that had _recognized_ _him_. _Serendipity._ Pride in your work, that was the thing. Stick to what you believe in, work hard, and recognition would come. Keep at it long enough and eventually they’ll be _screaming_ your name.

Thinking was hard for Hyde. He knew this. He was meant for action! To get out there and cut some throats, maybe a few abdomens. For Jack. Poor Jack. Poor Hyde, too. In a better organized world, he wouldn’t have to do this. Instead, he’d be the cause of _very worried_ thinking in other people.

Yes, thinking was hard for Hyde, but on the other hand, some things were important. He wanted very much for Serendipity to wake up again. Like the children, she’d been dismissed as too weak for the nightmare creature to steal away, but he knew she’d be able to _think_ at least a little better than him.

And if she couldn’t, well, there were other activities he wanted her to be awake for, too. You had to roll with life. But _waiting_ was the ultimate in ants in your pants, especially in a situation like this.

Every few minutes, he went over to the bed to see if she still lived. You could never be sure unless you checked. He’d brush her hand across her lips, insert a finger in her mouth. Once, he put his hand on her chest, over her heart.

Roughly. Roughly over her heart. He found out what he needed to know, anyhow.

But Artoria Alter, who didn’t trust him, told him not to do that again. Artoria Alter, who didn’t _understand_ that for anything more, anything really _fun_ , he’d need the Master awake. Really, it made you suspicious of what the black-hearted tyrant got up to with captured maidens in her tent.

Artoria was just so full of herself, the way she bossed him around. But like the children and the Master, Tora had been left behind by the nightmare creature. Weak enough to overlook, but powerful enough that she slept still, trapped in a petty madness. It hadn’t touched Artoria, though, just as the madness inflicted on Jekyll had left Hyde free to simply stroll right out of the nightmare creature’s little world.

But Artoria had no secret strength. She wouldn’t be Excaliburing anything. Especially not him. Hah!

He ought to show her how weak she was by fondling the Master all over. By pulling off those Magus-given clothes—

But no. No, _no,_ no _, no_. None of this was _right_ , which made acting _wrong_ much less fun. _He_ had to _be good_ —God fucking dammit. No. Surely he could wake her somehow?

Finally, near dawn, when he brushed his fingers across the Master’s lips, they parted naturally. He watched her closely, and her shadowless eyes opened a moment later.

“Hyde?” she said, her lashes fluttering as she focused on the face only a few inches from hers.

Hyde grinned. The thrill of _recognition_ would _never_ get old.

“Heyyy, Master,” he said. “How are we going to fix this?”

She pushed his face away as she sat up and he licked her hand, because of course he wasn’t going to miss an opportunity like _that_. Her eyes moved over the two snack-sized children sharing her bed: little Pan, tiny Lulu.

“There was a fight,” she said slowly.

“No,” corrected Artoria, joining Hyde beside the Master’s bed. “There was a rout. Cú Chulainn betrayed you and brought the creature from the woods into the Keep. Of course. Treachery destroys everything eventually,” added the blackened King of Knights impassively.

“No,” said the Master. “I called for him. I don’t remember why—” She frowned and lowered her gaze to her hand, where once again, the Command Seal array was empty.

Hyde said helpfully, “Once he was back, but not _really_ , if you get my drift, you used one Seal to try to call him back, _really_. It just made him turn into that Berserker thing. That sort of got the ball rolling on the whole massacre. I didn’t see you use the other.”

Serendipity paled and it was _so cute_ Hyde wanted to lick straight through to her oozing center. “M-m-massacre?”

“No one was killed, not even Ritsu,” said Artoria crisply. “That would have been counter to the creature’s purpose. They were one by one incapacitated and,” her mouth curled unpleasantly, “infected.”

“Even Merlin?” the Master said, in a tiny little voice that sent a thrill down Hyde’s spine. God damn, this was damn hard. Harder than he deserved. He _deserved_ something else entirely. He circled the bed until he was behind the Master, and fixed his gaze on the despair curve of her neck as she hunched forward.

Jekyll ought to be yelling at him right now, but Jekyll was busy huddling in a corner of their shared mental parlour, muttering inaudibly to himself. That was actually _too_ creepy. But his sweet, fragile, breakable Master would fix it, even if he had to stitch her together first to make it happen.

As the silent stare between Artoria and Serendipity drew itself out, Hyde sat down on the bed behind Serendipity and started pulling on stands of her hair, watching when she winced and when she didn’t.

Finally Artoria said, “Merlin tried to flee like the coward he is, but the creature wanted him the most, and took him first. That made defeating the others easy.” She gave Hyde a cold look as she spoke, and he smiled broadly at her as he slid his arms around the Master’s waist.

“Hyde,” she said, her voice trembling. “This isn’t the time—” She stopped abruptly as he licked her ear. Encouraged, he bit her ear and then licked down her throat. She sat very still, her pulse pounding under his tongue. A catch in her short, quick breathing finally short-circuited his carefully hoarded reason. All he could think of was the _so many_ things he wanted her awake for. The thought became the action, as it often did.

But he’d barely brushed her lips with his own when the silence from Jekyll got to him: a vast emptiness his deviance alone couldn’t fill. He bit her lip instead before pushing her away. “Aw, fight back, would you? If you let _me_ walk all over you, how are you going to defeat that bastard in the woods?”

Serendipity smiled briefly, in a way that made Hyde feel a little uncomfortable, like other people felt when they were naked. When her brow darkened once again, he felt much better.

She said, “Defeat it? Now? How? Is there a plan?”

Artoria shrugged. “Not from me. I’m nothing but an additional consciousness in Tora’s soul now, and my only plan is to guard you until you all wake up. Tora already understands that if you live, life has to go on. Sometimes breathing is the best you can hope for.”

Then they both looked at him, like they’d planned it that way.

“God, having to do everything around here is so annoying! No wonder Cú went berserk.” Hyde sprang to his feet and kicked the log burning in the big hearth. It broke amidst a shower of sparks. “I don’t make plans, see? Except very short-term ones that involve stringing up fingernails to make you a necklace, ok, I do make those, pretty much constantly. I kind of have to, because otherwise it is _so boring_ here.”

“Hyde,” said the Master gently. “What’s your plan for the creature in the wood?”

“No, no, no! I don’t have a plan.” He grinned. “I have a _thing I can do_. You make the plan.”

“Tell her the thing, half-wit,” said Artoria icily.

He hopped back onto the bed again, sitting on his knees, leaning forward on his hands. “The creature took Jekyll too. Into that Bounded Field, that little world where it’s draining everybody. But I got bored with that, so I walked us right back out again. Back and forth, back and forth. I can do that. You do the rest.”

“What do you want me to do?” The Master’s brow furrowed and it annoyed him. Was she an idiot? Oh, oh, or maybe she was fucking with him. That was probably it, _had_ to be it, and it was a _much_ more pleasant idea too

“Talk, talk, _talk_ to them, Master. Talk them out of the Bounded Field. Use their secrets as stepping stones. The secrets they think only you can see.” He waved a hand. “I mean, I see them too, but they know better than to listen to me, they’ve all got A-Rank Hyde Resistance. Except Jekyll, of course. We may have to, uh, _work together_ to get him out again. Heh, heh, heh.” Delicious thought. But contemplating that would drive him wild again.

Fingernails on a string, each one polished up. That was something to concentrate on.

“Jack and Astolfo?” queried Serendipity.

“Gone. They’re all gone. And the scrubs outside, too. And the fuzzy-wuzzies. Come on, come on! You’re awake now, so let’s go.”

“No,” said Artoria flatly. “She is not fit yet. She only just awoke. She must at the very least eat.”

Hyde rolled his eyes. “We don’t have time to sit around playing house, not even the way I like. Besides, who’s going to cook? Are you going to cook? I’m sure as hell not going to cook. Tell you what, I’ll kill her something in the woods. Raw meat’s good for your fighting spirit!” He whacked Ren on the back and then caught her as she almost fell off the bed.

The press of her breasts against his arm sent his mind back to an earlier conversational thread. “Alternately, you could just say, _ooh, yes, do me, Hyde,_ and that’d be great, too. Just don’t sit there so _passively_ or I’m gonna end up doing something that’ll get me nailed to an anthill with honey smeared on my balls. Especially if we don’t get Jekyll back.”

Ren sat up again, pushing him away. “You… _want_ Jekyll back? I thought—”

“Hell yeah! What the fuck? What’s the fun of doing _anything_ without that little voice screaming that _I shouldn’t_ , _I shouldn’t_? Plus, if Jekyll’s gone, it’s like losing a get-out-of-being-hanged card. I mean, who’s going to kill _me_ when it also means killing that sweet, floppy cherub? Though, seriously, Master, I mean _floppy_. Don’t count on him for—” Suddenly Serendipity’s fingers covered his mouth, which seemed like a great opportunity to lick her again.

She grabbed his lower lip and tugged on it gently before releasing him, and his motormouth started right back up again. “Jekyll likes having me around, too. For, oh, a million reasons. Of course, he needs me to admit it for him. So, yeah, you gotta sort this out or my life expectancy’s gonna get a lot shorter.”

“Is that why we don’t have time?” she asked.

“Ahaha. Hahahahah. Hahaha. No.” For some reason this didn’t seem to be enough for her, as her eyebrows furrowed and her mouth curved into a perfect _o._ He stuck his finger in, shuddered as her tongue flicked over his fingertip, and yanked his hand away, all the way to behind his back. “Creature’s feeding on them somehow. I mean, if you don’t wanna do that whole _conquer the world in Ritsu’s name_ thing after all, I guess you don’t need them. _I_ wouldn’t miss them, except for maybe the kids.” He stuck the finger she’d licked in his own mouth a moment, thinking. “Nah, we should go, right now. Pretty sure that’s my best odds for happy fun time later. You give up on world domination, and you’re not going to be anywhere near strong enough for what I want to do.”

“One hour,” said Artoria flatly. “She can drink some tea. I refuse to believe you can’t make tea, half-wit. You _are_ English, aren’t you?”

The thing about being _recognized_ is that you no longer have to respond to other forms of address. So Hyde didn’t, admiring instead the way Ren’s hair twined around her throat. But then the Master gave him a tiny, encouraging smile and sweet, frustrating annoyance washed over him in a great wave.

He rose to his feet. “Fine! I’ll make tea! Blame yourself if it ends up poisoned, or if razorblades end up in your cakes. I _tried_ to keep me out of the kitchen, but I can only do so much. My job is _kill kill kill_ , people, not babysitter.”


	31. Ren Reacts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little shorter than has become usual--this is a distracting week full of end-of-summer schedule shifts. Happily, 'distractions' just means 'shorter and less exciting', not 'no post at all'.

Ren huddled in the kitchen next to the hearth, drinking the tea Hyde had prepared. Despite his threats, he’d added sugar instead of poison, but it was still hot and sharp and refreshing to her scattered wits.

Everything since she’d gone to bed the night before still felt like a bad dream only barely remembered. But they were all gone, every Servant she’d summoned save for Hyde, and Ritsu as well. It was enough that she wanted to believe _this_ was the bad dream. But she knew the difference.

Artoria Alter stood in the kitchen, watching her. She looked exactly as she had when she’d held Ren by the hair in the Sovereign camp, and the empty coldness of her gaze was more than a little frightening. But she seemed to still be functioning as Tora’s Servant, pursuing Tora’s goals—and that was currently the protection of the existing children and herself.

Hyde crouched in the corner of the kitchen, behind Ren, but she could feel his intent gaze fixed on her. Her skin prickled under it, and even though he’d placed himself out of reach, she kept expecting to once again feel his arms sliding around her. His previous embrace had been both stressful and exhilarating—and all the more so when he’d released her on his own, despite all Jekyll’s warnings. But it was a distraction she didn’t need, all the same.

She finished her tea, and Hyde growled, “More? Or can we get this fucking show on the road?”

Ren exhaled. “Is this going to work? Is there any real chance _I_ can save them?”

“No,” said Artoria Alter bluntly.“You’re Red Riding Hood walking into the woods with the Wolf.”

“How about if you came too?” asked Ren tentatively, because she had to ask. But when Artoria shook her head, Ren felt only relief.

“I won’t do that. Protecting the remaining children was my Master’s last command.”

Ren stood up. Her body ached with bruises and muscle strain that hadn’t been there the night before: yet another sign that something worse than a dream had occurred. “Well… Is there anything _else_ I can do? Other than acting out a fairy tale?”

Icily, Artoria Alter said, “You already know the answer to that.”

Hyde bounded to his feet. “Yes, let’s go, let’s go!”

And so they went.

The Sovereign campsite beyond the walls of the Summoner’s Castle had been kicked apart, with supplies unloaded from the dragon and the kirin tumbled this way and that. Ren’s fragmented memories only covered parts of the previous night’s conflict taking place _within_ the castle walls, but it looked like the Sovereign champions had at least tried to fight back against whatever had taken them.

Deep shadows still cloaked the forest, even the scar left by Artoria Alter’s intial greeting. As Ren eyed it apprehensively, Hyde tugged her in a different direction, more to the north of the Castle.“This way!”

He led her to a narrow trail into the underbrush, and shoved her ahead of him, retaining a hold on her top. “You first.”

“Wouldn’t it be better the other way around?” Ren protested. “You’re the one who knows where we’re going.”

Hyde snorted. “It’s a trail. The trick isn’t finding the thing, it’s getting inside. Nah, much better if you go first. That way nothing can snatch you away when I’m not looking.” And he grinned to make sure she understood that he would definitely be looking.

Ren squashed down ordinary feelings. In a fairy tale or a nightmare, what did they matter? Into the woods with the Wolf behind her she went.

They walked along the trail for a while, and the only sound was their footsteps and the occasional hitch in Hyde’s breathing. She heard no birds, no insects, and barely any wind. The fresh clean scent of the forest gradually shifted, until it was musty and… hard, somehow. Not alive, not rotten, but _dry_ , like the rooms of the keep nobody had entered for years.

Finally, at no place in particular, Hyde hauled her back by her top. “Here we go. Good thing. I was running out of ways to distract myself!” He picked her up princess-style and she instinctively clutched at him.

“Don’t jump!”

He grinned down at her. “Merlin really fucked that up, didn’t he? Moron. All the better for me, though!” And then, delicately, he stepped forward, his shoulders hunching down as if he expected to pass through something unpleasant.

The passage through the barrier of the Bounded Field felt like crossing the boundary of sleep. She remembered more of the night before—

_Cú complaining in answer to her call, and then appearing before her, learing. And behind him—_

_—And then she’d tried to bring him to his senses with a Command Seal and he’d_ transformed _instead, and started attacking the others._

_Jack, crying out for her. Astolfo, fleeing, laughing, into the night. Merlin, looking as if something faintly bothered him and he couldn’t figure out what it was, even as Cú sent him flying._

Something had invaded her mind. The dreamlike nature of the night before wasn’t just that she’d been half-asleep when it started, but the result of something left behind by the creature that had taken the others. She didn’t think she could get any closer to what had happened without risking a relapse into nightmare mode.

“Oh yes, yes, this is nice,” murmured Hyde into her ear. “Sometimes you have to ask yourself, is survival really worth it?”

Ren realized that not only was she still clinging to Hyde, but she’d wrapped herself around him like she was Jack. As she became aware, her grip loosened and his own tightened, until she dropped her feet to the ground.

“This place is _really_ dull,” Hyde warned her as he mostly released her, save for a hank of her hair he held like a leash.

She took his hand from her hair and put it back on her top, and then looked around. But Hyde was right. They were… nowhere. Almost nowhere.She stood on a sheared stone surface, surrounded by a patchy mist. The dim light had no obvious source, but it was brighter than moonlight on a cloudy night. The air moved fitfully, like it wanted to have a breeze but couldn’t quite manage it. There was no visible sign of the barrier they’d passed through.

“How big is this place?”

Hyde paced around her in a circle. “Dunno. Pretty big. I didn’t find any of those other losers before I found the boundary.”

Ren felt like she was missing something. “So why have only you left? I mean, this _is_ really boring. Not what I expected from a creature’s lair. What’s keeping them here?”

After a puzzled look, Hyde said, “Oh! Right. This isn’t the web, master. This is the spider.”

A chill ran down Ren’s spine. “You mean _this_ is the creature?”

“No, no, no. I mean, maybe it is. I’m not Jekyll, or that other ivory tower pansy. How should I know? But it’s not what came to the keep. But the Bounded Field is what’s draining them. What’s _keeping_ them here is….” He tapped his head. “Madness. The creature’s got them all participating in a story or something, I dunno, I didn’t pay that much attention. Jekyll’s still trapped in it, though.”

Ren closed her mouth on _why can’t we get him out first?_ “All right. How do we find them?”

Hyde shrugged and gave her a bright-eyed, expectant look. “You’re the Master.”

Artoria Alter had told her exactly the opposite, a few days ago. _You’re no Master._ She wondered if anything had changed. She could reach out to them now… But doing that had somehow triggered this whole mess, and without Command Seals… yeah, no.

She turned her face toward the fitful gusts of wind. “All right. That way.”

Once again, Hyde shrugged, grinned and gestured for her to walk in front of him. She shook her head, though. “No. Walk beside me. This place is too boring to walk through alone.”

“I told ya,” he said, but he looked pleased.

As they walked into the breeze, something occasionally crunched underfoot. When the crunching became every other step, Ren paused to investigate. Although the light was dim, once she stooped down, it was easy to see the thickening carpet of dead insects.

“Ew,” said Hyde as Ren picked up a dead grasshopper. “I meant the spider thing as a metaphor. We see one, I’m stabbing it, Master.”

“Hmm,” said Ren, dropping the grasshopper and then scraping her foot back and forth, leaving an arc of empty stone. “Let’s change direction. Follow the edge of the bug rug. Keep an eye out for a trail.”

They spent a long time following the edge of the bug rug, until finally they came back to the place they’d started. The sweep of Ren’s foot remained, the edges fuzzed only slightly by the scattered breeze. Hyde, already getting more and more restless, complained, “Aw, that should have worked.”

“It did, I think,” said Ren. “The wind kept changing direction as we walked. I think it’s coming from inside the bug rug. Not the center of it, thank God, but…” She nodded firmly. “I think that wind is being generated by something with wings.”


	32. Ren Makes Progress?

*crunch* *crunch* Ren told herself it was like walking across autumn leaves. *crunch* Except it wasn’t very much like that at all. Leaves didn’t _pop_ as they disintegrated. And it didn’t help that Hyde was gleefully enjoying himself, twisting his foot to grind the shells to powder, and occasionally hanging back so he could dash up to her and skid on the carapaces of the dead insects.

But as they approached the source of the breeze, the bug rug thinned, presumably the result of the fitful wind. But the wind, too, died away, and that made Ren nervous. “Did we lose it?”

“Maybe whatever it was flew away,” suggested Hyde, shrugging.

“Why couldn’t the wind blow away this stupid fog?” Ren demanded. She then called, “Hello? Is anybody out there?”

The mist swallowed her voice, but a moment later, something loomed out of the dimness: two feet taller than her, and twice as wide, with a snarling tusked visage and a battleaxe. It roared at them and swung the battleaxe at Ren.

She jumped backward with a squeak, evading its initial blow. It didn’t have a chance for a second swing before Hyde bounced in front of it, grinning manically. His hand flashed and the leather covering the monster’s abdomen slit open, red spraying out. The monster shrieked, but the shriek cut off abruptly in a bubbling sound as crimson foam bubbled under its chin. Then, although there was still no detectable wind, the monster simply blew away, turning back into mist again.

Hyde turned to where Ren crouched, still grinning, his eyes wide with delight. The monster’s blood hadn’t vanished when it did, and the spray still decorated the Servant and dyed his knife. “That was _perfect_. Even Jekyll couldn’t argue with that. No mess to clean up after! Shout again!”

Ren narrowed her eyes and then cupped her hands around her mouth. “Anybody! Can you hear me?”

Hyde cocked his head, listening as the mist once again swallowed her voice. Ren only had a sense of a shadow moving when Hyde suddenly lunged forward, swinging his knife in a wide arc. Something clanged and jangled. Then Hyde ducked and skidded, sweeping his leg around as another oversized man-beast, this one with horns, staggered past him, its chainmail gaping from a horizontal slash. When Hyde hooked his leg around the minotaur’s, it fell flat on its face and Hyde finished it off with a knife in the back.

It faded away as he knelt on it, and he sprang to his feet again. “I could do this all day,” he said. “Hmm. But should I?” He gave Ren a sidelong look.

“You think it’s bait?”

“Yeah. Pretty primo stuff, though.” He kicked at the mist. “Totally solid, until it’s not.”

Ren crossed her arms on her knees, looking up at him thoughtfully. “This is what you want out of existence?”

Hyde’s expression darkened. “It ain’t so different than what the rest of them want, is it? When you get right down to it, all those so-called Heroic Spirit Servants are just murder machines, same as me.”

“Jack likes eating and sleeping. Astolfo wants to explore. And Cú likes fishing—eek!” Ren squeaked as Hyde grabbed her arm and hauled her up, his face twisted with anger.

“Shut up. Anyhow, all those _heroes_ ran off and left you, and only I stuck around, right? So don’t knock the murder machines.”

His grip on her arm was very tight. Her heart pounded and she was keenly aware she had no Command Seals, but she kept her voice mild as she told him, “You’re hurting me.”

“Hah!” he said, but he released her and turned away to look into the nothingness of the fog.

Ren hesitated, recalling a conversation with Cú. Then she put her hand on Hyde’s back, under his vest, only his thin white shirt between her fingers and his hot skin. She scratched lightly,trying to show him that she _did_ value him. His muscles jumped against her palm.

“My self-control’s huddled in a ball hallucinating right now, _Master_ ,” said Hyde, his voice even harsher than usual.

“And yet something’s holding you back,” said Ren, continuing to move her fingers. “What’s that?”

Hyde twisted his head to look down at her, and a toothy grin stretched his face. “Conflicting interests. Don’t go putting your thumb on the scales unless you want to deal with the fallout.”

Ren’s hand stilled but she didn’t withdraw it. “Jekyll basically said the same thing.”

“No, not really.”

“No? Well, anyhow, you’re clearly not just a murder machine either.”

Hyde snorted. “‘Course I am. I’m proud of it.”

Ren responded by scratching his back again. It was, under the circumstances, a mad thing to do, but she was in the realm of madness and fairy tales now. Or maybe she just empathized with his constrained existence.

In any case, he responded instantly, turning to her so that her arm was wrapped around him and his arm wrapped around her. His eyes gleaming, he traced her mouth with his thumb and then drew his fingernail lightly down her jaw to her jumping pulse. He lowered his mouth to hers, but instead of kissing her again, he said, his breath tickling her lips, “Aw, don’t try to make me into a good guy, Master. My only other interest is just as bad, isn’t it?”

As soon as her lips parted to answer, he licked them, licked his way between them, touched her tongue with his. Then he moved his mouth to her ear and said, “Or is this _do me, Hyde_ already? Easier than I thought it’d be…”

Breathlessly aware of every movement of his hands and mouth, and of his body pressed against hers, Ren said, “You know this is the local summoning magic, right? It makes you want to touch me.”

Hyde nibbled on her ear. “Makes me want to fuck you,” he corrected. “Don’t really matter if it’s that or your gorgeous legs, or your sweet ass, or your pushy mouth, does it?”

It took Ren a moment to process that, a moment extended by Hyde moving his hand under her tunic to the skin beneath. He’d almost done that before, she remembered, before Jekyll had burned Merlin’s charm to seize back control. This time, nothing stopped Hyde and the feel of his palm against sensitive skin was _very_ distracting. A small, distant internal voice shouted at her about _enemies,_ about _man-beasts_ , about _Ritsu,_ and she’d have to pay attention very soon…

“Yup, yup, yup,” said a much louder external voice, and two heads suddenly popped up beside them: one with a pink braid and one with a hooked beak. “It’s good to be straight—” Astolfo and the Hippogriff smoothly evaded Hyde’s flashing knifestroke as he released Ren and struck in a single move. “—forward about these things, at least in my experience. Hi, Master!”

Dazed, Ren didn’t resist as Hyde dragged her behind him and lunged at Astolfo again with a growl. Effortlessly, Astolfo and his mount once again sidestepped the attack, as if by accident. “But it doesn’t really matter why, or even how _we_ want you, Master, does it? I think what really matters is why… or how, I guess, _you_ want us. We’re the Servants, after all.”

The Rider’s words barely made an impression on Ren, but his _presence_ finally did. “Astolfo!” She grabbed Hyde’s vest and pulled hard. “Stop!”

Grumbling under his breath, Hyde relaxed. “Wasn’t gonna be any fun anyhow without…”

Astolfo snorted. “You say that but _look_ at her.” He jumped off the Hippogriff and elbowed Ren, whispering to her, “I mean, I know the appeal. Look at Hippogriff there. You know what makes a Hippogriff? It’s when a Griffin mates with his prey instead of devouring it. Heh heh heh.” Astolfo’s cheerful grin took both sting and lechery out of the remark.

Totally bewildered, Ren said, “How are you…. Why are you _here,_ Astolfo? And how are you powering your Noble Phantasm?”

“What do you mean, why am I here?” asked Astolfo. “Everybody else ran off here, right? Even you’re here now!”

“She ain’t in the story,” said Hyde sullenly. “Just like I’m not. Pretty sure you are, though.”

Astolfo narrowed his eyes, and then abruptly wrapped his arms around Ren from behind. He was shorter than Hyde, short enough to easily rest his chin on Ren’s shoulder, and he did so. “Hah! I see!”

“Cut it out, asshole,” Hyde growled, fidgeting with his knife.

“Me?” said Astolfo innocently, before Ren shook him off. He laughed, leaping backward.

“What do you see?” she asked.

“What _you_ see _,_ I think. Pretty bleak! Mist and stone and Mr. Sharp there all bloody. I can sort of see it, if I squint, but there’s all this other stuff, too. Wanna see?”

Ren thought for a moment. “Soon. But—Astolfo, can you tell me what _happened_ last night? Hyde’s…”

“A Berserker, yup,” said Astolfo. “Sure. Okay, storytime!” He plopped down on the ground and the Hippogriff stretched out behind him. “Cú showed up in the middle of the night and brought a little kid with him. The kid had a fairy attached to him somehow. You got really upset and used a Command Seal, which kind of… broke Cú, maybe ’cause the fairy had already put the whammy on him. So Cú went on a rampage, but Merlin convinced him to take it out on the guys outside, and while _he_ did that, the fairy put the whammy on everybody else. You and Tora fell asleep, and the fairy yanked everybody else into its spell and then went out and picked up Cú and the others too and now we’re all here together working on this other thing.” He looked up at Ren. “How’s that? Better than Hyde’s explanation?”

“Uh,” said Ren, overwhelmed by the rush of words. “Other thing?”

“The fairy’s thing,” said Astolfo vaguely. “It’s kind of… a ritual thing?”

“It’s what’s draining ‘em,” said Hyde.

“I guess,” said Astolfo doubtfully. “I mean anything we do as Servants is gonna drain us somehow, right?” He brightened suddenly. “But Master’s here now, and she can keep us recharged! The other Master’s going to love that!”

_The other Master_ , thought Ren with a cold chill. But something else was more important. “Astolfo, Ritsu and the locals _aren’t Servants_. Are they being drained too?”

Astolfo’s face fell. “Uh… I think so?”

“They are,” said Hyde, almost smugly. “I told you, didn’t I?”

Ren’s hands curled into fists. Even though she still felt uncomfortable and uncertain about her missing memories, her goals clarified. “Right. Take me to this other Master.”


	33. The Master of Raven Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get weirder. Ren tries to keep up.

“Ooh,” said Hyde. “Are we going to kill this other Master? I like that!”

“I don’t know,” said Ren. “If we have to. I can’t let Ritsu stay here. Astolfo?”

Astolfo scratched his Hippogriff’s head for a moment. When he lifted his hand, the Hippogriff faded in a swirl of magic. “Sure, I can take you there. But you gotta keep Hyde under control.”

Hyde bared his teeth at Astolfo, who stuck his tongue out. Ren put her hand on Hyde’s back again and felt a shudder ripple through him. He said, “Gonna play dirty, Master? I’m down for that.”

“You’re useful,” she told him. “So I’ll give you the self-control you need. Astolfo… lead on.”

Astolfo pulled his mouth to one side, closing one eye. “Yup, yup. Except you’re just going to walk through walls the way you are. Hm.” He took her free hand. “I’ve got to show you what you’re missing first.”

“How come _you_ can see us _and_ the fairy tale?” grumbled Hyde.

“‘Cause I’m a total idiot, of course,” said Astolfo blithely. “I mean, sometimes when you jump off the cliff, you fall, and sometimes you land on the invisible bridge, right? But you’re not going to prove the invisible bridge is there unless you jump first!” He closed his other eye and concentrated before saying, “Do you see it yet?”

The mist swirled over empty stone. Ren said, “No?”

“You’re clinging too hard to reason, Master,” chided Astolfo. “You have to relax.”

Hyde yawned. “Whatever. Let’s go. I can borrow Jekyll’s vision and I’ll carry her if I have to.”

“There’s a lot of stairs in the Raven Tower,” Astolfo warned. “And they start right over there.”

Ren’s stomach flip-flopped. “You’ll carry me up invisible stairs?”

“If we do find Merlin, I’m totally going to stab him,” said Hyde. “That’ll help, Master.”

Shaking her head, Ren said, “No, I can do this. I’m going to close my eyes, though.”

“Huh,” said Astolfo. “You’ve got your own Evaporation of Reason, Master? But that’s right! Trust the you that trusts him!” He dashed away and then turned back to wave. “Come on!” Then he jumped up and landed on the mist, two feet above the ground.

Ren immediately felt sick to her stomach and her touch on Hyde’s back became clutching at his shirt. He twisted around and scooped her up again.

“What does it look like, this fairy tale?” she muttered as she closed her eyes. “What do the stairs look like?”

“They’re stairs,” said Hyde. “Wooden, polished, broad. It looks like that Clocktower place.”

It wasn’t much of a description, but Ren concentrated on imagining it as Hyde moved. It was much, much better than visualizing him climbing empty air.

Hyde’s breathing slowly harshened as time passed. Ren asked in a small voice, “Is it steep? Am I tiring you out?”

The Berserker’s movement stopped and then he was nuzzling Ren’s face. “It’s boring, Master. So boring. And you smell so good…” His grip on her shifted as he adjusted how he held her so he could nuzzle more of her.

“Hey, Hyde, if you take advantage of Master, I’m going to have to kick you off the stairs. Come on, you can do this, we’re halfway up.” Astolfo paused. “Or I could carry her? Ooh, I want to carry her! Gimme.”

“I’m not a toy,” said Ren and gently pushed Hyde’s face away from her own. He _didn’t_ lick her this time, which she found a little worrying. “Keep climbing, Hyde. Rewards and refreshment come later.”

Without speaking, Hyde started moving again. Astolfo said only, “Aww,” before falling silent.

Ren didn’t particularly _want_ to think about what she was promising Hyde but as he cradled her against him, his breath occasionally stirring her hair, she found it unavoidable. She remembered how she’d fled from Cú’s suggestion that she was seducing him. Hyde’s lust she found both exciting and troubling, but not terrifying. And it wasn’t that she wasn’t attracted to Cú. She most definitely was.

Astolfo’s earlier words resurfaced. _I think what really matters is why… or how, I guess, you want us._ She thought about that for a while, and about Hyde’s _conflicting_ _interests_ , and how her own original reaction to the idea of _intimacy_ had been dread.

She didn’t really know herself all that well. How could she? How much of her was there to know? Maybe her fear of intimacy was because whoever she became close to would discover there was nothing really there. But that wasn’t a worry with Hyde. She wasn’t even sure he saw what _was_ there, instead of what he projected onto her.

With a sigh, she realized that Cú had probably been right when he’d gently rejected sex with her as _too complicated_. She wanted him to respect her, wanted to support him as a warrior and provide him with good leadership. She knew with a gut certainty that such required keeping uncontrollable emotions under wraps, at least for the foreseeable future.

Hah! The foreseeable future? She wasn’t sure what the next ten minutes would bring. Cú had practically turned into a beast, a Berserker version of himself. He and Merlin—

Abruptly, she pressed her face into Hyde’s chest, forcing herself to stop thinking. She might not be much more than a fragment of a person, but she could help people. She could help Ritsu. That was why she was here.

Wasn’t it?

“Bite me,” Hyde whispered to her, and Ren, angry at herself and at the direction of her thoughts, did, sinking her teeth into the front of his shoulder through his shirt. Hyde’s breath hissed as he stopped walking, and his grip on her tightened until he was crushing her to him.

“We’re almost there,” said Astolfo coaxingly, from right beside them. “One more flight! Isn’t it weird how it’s called a flight? I wish I could have kept Hippogriff out. But that wouldn’t have been very fair to everybody else, even if it’s easier here.”

Ren blinked and pulled away from Hyde, although his arms remained tight. He’d whispered to her at _just_ the right time, as if he’d been able to read her emotions perfectly. She opened her eyes, looking up into his face. His pupils had dilated enormously, almost consuming his crimson irises.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “I was… upset.”

Slowly Hyde’s body loosened. After a full minute, with Astolfo still babbling in the background, Hyde said, “Yeah. Any time,” and started climbing again.

When he stopped at the final landing, with Astolfo crowing about how they were finally there, Ren wriggled. “Put me down.” When Hyde obliged her, keeping one hand around her waist, she carefully looked around.

Stone ground. Mist. Nothing else. No sign she’d gone anywhere. There were even still bug carapaces scattered on the ground. The realization gave her vertigo as she looked over her shoulder, up in the air, and all around. “Why did we even bother?”

“It matters to the squirt.” Hyde shrugged.

“I’ll be right back,” announced Astolfo. “I have to ask him about you first.” He raised his fist and made a knocking motion on the air. Then he tilted his head, opened an invisible door, stepped through… and vanished.

Ren scrambled across the stone after him. “Where did he go, Hyde? Can you go after him?”

“He went through the door.” Hyde’s eyes narrowed. “Huh. Weird.” He followed her across the stone and put his hand where Astolfo had.

Then he recoiled backward as Astolfo burst into sight again. After a hectic moment of shoving and cursing and Astolfo dancing around avoiding Hyde’s knife, Astolfo said, “He says you can come in, Master. He’s very interested in meeting you.”

Frustrated, Ren hopped from one side of where she thought the invisible door was to the other, and then back again. “How? Must Hyde carry me again? Wouldn’t it just be stone on the other side?”

Astolfo unfolded his hand, showing an empty, stoppered vial of cut crystal. “He gave me this. A way of inducing the madness needed to be here.” He rotated the vial between his fingers and a single drop of amber fluid slid from the bottom to the stopper.

Ren blinked. “Uh.” She glanced between Astolfo and Hyde. Astolfo jiggled the vial encouragingly and she realized she had no reason to trust him. The newest of her Servants, famously mercurial, and she didn’t have the magecraft to evaluate whether he was bound to her in any way. Perhaps this other Master had stolen him. Perhaps this was all a trick.

But Hyde looked at her like she was the only thing in the world, despite his ability to borrow Jekyll’s madness. Even if she could invent reasons to doubt him, she still believed everything he’d told her thus far. His own madness had prevented him from being co-opted by the forces that ruled this strange reality bubble.

“Okay,” she said slowly. “Hyde, if I forget why I’m here, get me out and do whatever’s required to bring me back to myself.”

Hyde narrowed his eyes. “How’m I supposed to do that?”

Ren bit her lip and his gaze focused on her mouth. In response, she pulled him down to her by his tie and kissed him. Not the chaste kiss she’d given Cú once upon a time, but a kiss as aggressive and passionate as the first time Hyde had kissed her. She tried to gather up everything she was—and it was so very little—and put it into that kiss, as Hyde took over control, his hands roaming over her body.

When he ripped the high neckline of her tunic, though, she put her hands on his chest and pushed him away. Grumbling deep in his throat, he resisted for a moment. “The body remembers,” she murmured against him. “If I need it, you’ll remind me.”

Grudgingly, he released her. “I better get the best hair care ever out of this, Master. Not just brushing but shampoo, conditioning, the works.” He grinned at her. “In fact, you can just give me a bath.”

“Ooh, yes,” said Astolfo, who’d once again been watching them with an oddly wholesome interest. “We should all bathe together. Skinship! As soon as you get all this sorted out, Master!”

Something bright bloomed in Ren and she couldn’t help smiling at Astolfo as she realized she’d been wrong when she’d thought she couldn’t trust the paladin. He was odd, whimsical, and reckless… but he wouldn’t willingly hurt her. She took the vial from his open palm, pulled out the stopper, and drank it.

It tasted of the border between life and death, and dissolved in her mouth before she could swallow it. And then she could feel each thump of her heart, three beats, and then…

She was a dragon.

With hands, yes, all right. Hands and feet and her wings were annoyingly tucked away and she didn’t even have a _tail_ like Elizabeth, or horns, but it didn’t matter, because she _knew_ what she was, and that was _definitely_ a dragon.

She eyed her loyal servants, and then this heavy carved wooden door. Astolfo had said the one who had stolen her stuff was beyond it. All she had to do was step along and tell him to back off.

Well, she had nothing to wait for. She flung open the door and stomped into the room, ready to breathe fire.

The room beyond was a library, or a study filled with so many books that the distinction was meaningless. A youngish man sat at a desk, leaning back, his feet up as he read a small volume held in one hand. A window beyond him showed a blue sky with dark specks wheeling against it. The chamber was absolutely full of magic. It crashed into Ren like a wave, making her fingers tingle and the hair on her arms stand on end. She quivered as she stood against it, but she had the heart of a dragon and plenty of magic of her own—

_Wait, did she?_

Of course she did. Dragons were innately magical beings.

The man lowered his book to look at her, and for a moment her vision doubled and two very different men sat there. But when she squinted, the images converged and there was only the one man, long of limb and dark of hair, with an ironical expression as he raised his eyebrows at her. “That worked? Well, come in, and close the door.”

Astolfo took care of that after Ren and Hyde had entered, and then bounced forward. “I’ll introduce you. Ren, this is the Master of Raven Tower. Jonathan, this is the Master of Summoning.”

The Master of Raven Tower closed his book with a snap. “Astolfo, what have I told you about using True Names?”

“I haven’t!” said Astolfo cheerfully. “Not completely, anyhow.”

“Enough small talk,” announced Ren, irritably. She was a dragon, dammit. She didn’t have to deal with this. She stalked forward and leaned on the other Master’s messy desk. “You. Let my people go.”

“Hmm,” said the man called Jonathan. “And why ought I to do that?”

“If you don’t, I’ll rip your head off.” Ren growled to show she was serious.

The man leaned on one elbow, looking up at her, before poking her nose with his other hand. “Nope. That won’t be happening. I’d be embarrassed to see you try, honestly.”

“Grrr.” Ren ground her teeth, leaning closer. She’d just have to overpower him with sheer force of will. But he didn’t flinch, didn’t blink, until they were nose to nose.

Then he said, conversationally, “Would you like some cookies? The pastry cook we have right now is quite good. They’re in the tin to your left.”

Ren’s gaze slid sideways and there the tin was. It had flowers printed on it.

“Oh, and sit down,” said the magus in her ear, and she collapsed into the chair that suddenly knocked into her knees.

Wildly, she looked around. Astolfo had his hands clasped behind his head, watching with joyful interest, while Hyde crouched down near the door, his gaze dreamy and faraway. The chair she’d fallen into was comfortably upholstered and the Master of Raven Tower was presenting her with cookies.

“Is any of this _real_?” she demanded. “What about the fairy controlling the boy that Astolfo mentioned?”

“One of my fairy servants,” said the Master of Raven Tower, as if it wasn’t very interesting. “Do take a cookie. They’re molasses. And after you’ve tried it, tell me why you’re so interested in pulling your people away from me.”

Glaring, wishing for her fiery breath, Ren took a cookie and bit into it pointedly. The Master of Raven Tower watched her in amusement, which was _not_ the reaction desired.

“You’re draining _my_ servants,” she informed him. “Using them in your magic. And the humans, too, which is even more monstrous. Absolutely despicable.”

“And you’d have me… what… send them back to your own dying world instead?” The Master bit into a cookie of his own, cocking an eyebrow at her.

Ren frowned. “What do you mean, dying?”

“Oh, come now. Even if you’re immortal yourself, surely you know what _dying_ means?”

Impatiently, Ren said, “Of course. But how can a world be dying?”

The Master leaned back in his chair. “Worlds die all the time.” He gave a quick, wolfish grin. “Some of us fight against it, though. But your world—” and Ren shifted uncomfortably, because it wasn’t _her_ world, “—is about to collapse utterly. I’m surprised it’s still functional at all, given how many holes have been torn through it.”

And then Ren’s vision doubled again, and the _other_ man she’d seen: small, shriveled, elderly, took the place of the Master of Raven Tower, saying sourly, “I _told_ you, Jonathan. World 2m19 is unusual. It’s been on the verge of collapse for decades, perhaps even centuries in local time.”

Then the first man appeared, his teeth clenched in a faux smile as he said, “Yes, Gilbert, but that’s _not helpful_ to share right now.”

Ren looked around again, wondering if Astolfo or dreamy-eyed Hyde was seeing this, or if it was somehow related to the madness potion she’d taken. But while Hyde still seemed dazed, Astolfo gave her a big, unsubtle wink.

Meanwhile, the Master of Raven Tower buried his face in his hands a moment. When he pulled them away, he gave her a rueful grin. “My partner,” he said. “But we were talking about your friends, and how you wanted to save them. But I truly believe, Miss, that if that’s your goal… your best chance is helping us.”


	34. Predatory Worlds

Ren gripped the desk, digging in her imaginary talons. “You’re using them up, not saving them.”

“Ah, but you’re here now,” said Jonathan. “And you can help with that.” He leaned forward. “My world withers as well, but it isn’t yet doomed like yours. You can save it.”

With a scowl, Ren said, “What makes a world die anyhow? Pollution? Bombs? What did you _do?_ ”

Absently, Jonathan picked up a pen and began to twirl it as he studied her. Finally, he said, “They once said God saw the fall of every sparrow in every world, but eventually that became too much. Infinite variation carries a very high price.” His mouth twisted unpleasantly. “Too high for God to pay. And so God looks away sometimes. The worlds God ignores fall away like branches trimmed from a tree.”

He tapped his pen on the desk. “As a lopped branch can still flower, so the worlds abandoned by God still _live_ … for a time. But without the blessing of God, without a connection to the root of the tree, irregularities develop and spread like a cancer, until the world collapses entirely, giving its remaining energy back to the universe… if it isn’t claimed by another dying world first.”

Ren watched him, mesmerized by his voice. He met her gaze for a long moment and then said, “Now, your world—”

“It’s not my world,” she interrupted. “I was called there, or maybe sent, to save it.”

“ _Were_ you?” asked the Master of Raven Tower, looking intrigued. “By whom?” He picked up a lens the size of his palm and squinted at Ren through it.

Ren shrugged. “I don’t know. But I know I was sent to help.”

He considered. “To help the world? Or individuals within it? Because if the latter, I maintain that you would help them more by helping me.”

“You haven’t even told me what you’re doing,” she pointed out, and caught Astolfo giving her a double thumbs-up from the corner of her eye.

“Ah, yes! Well, this started as a routine harvesting spell. The form varies—I think this time it’s become something called a Holy Grail War. Quite an efficient magical reactor, potentially. But I think with your assistance and… some other unexpected factors… we can achieve the goal of a millenium. For you know, Miss Ren, a branch lopped from a tree may be replanted in a suitable medium, and so _root itself.”_

His enthusiasm, his _hope_ , was contagious, but Hyde shifted behind her, standing up slowly, and Ren leaned away from the Master of Raven Tower. “What are the other unexpected factors?”

Jonathan frowned and tapped his pen again. “My fairy’s harvesting spell collected two particularly significant individuals.” He paused and Ren waited aggressively, pretty sure she knew where he was going. Finally, he sighed and went on. “The little girl with the familiar is… a living magic of a sort I haven’t before seen. Fate constantly shifts around her. Frankly, that we were able to capture her suggests to me that we’re meant to be her salvation.”

Ren clenched her fists. “ _I’m_ meant to be her salvation. Who’s your other significant individual?”

Jonathan’s frown deepened. Once again he flickered, and Ren saw Gilbert with his hands over his mouth as if contemplating a wonder or a horror. Then Jonathan reappeared, swallowing as if his mouth had gone dry. “Merlin. How it happened is beyond me, but we found Merlin in that Swiss-cheese world.”

“I summoned him,” Ren snapped, jumping to her feet. “And I want him back along with everybody else.”

“Help us and you’ll have your chance to reclaim him,” countered Jonathan. “That’s the joy and wonder of this, don’t you see? You needn’t sacrifice anybody we’ve already collected.”

“What about the world you collected them from? Ritsu’s world?” Ren thought of Tora, alone in the Summoner’s Castle except for two tiny children.

Jonathan shrugged. “A lost cause already.”

“Your other self said it’s hung on as a _lost cause_ for a long time already,” Ren pointed out acidly.

“This is true, and makes for an interesting case study, but I wouldn’t wish to abandon anybody I cared about there,” Jonathan countered. “Its survival now, even in the most optimal conditions, is about as likely as brine-soaked driftwood taking root in sand. Our world has much better prospects. We’ve been husbanding our resources very carefully.”

Ren stared at him fiercely until abruptly a headache swept over her and the world around her faded to ghost-like insubstantiality. She clutched her head and sank into the chair again, vaguely aware that somehow she’d been dreaming she was a dragon, while being perfectly awake, aware and herself. It left her incredibly confused.

Astolfo crouched beside her, holding a cookie. “It’s all right, Master. You’re still here. You can come back again. Eat another cookie.”

Ren looked around. Hyde had come up behind her chair, once again watching her like she was the only thing in the world. The study still surrounded her, but ghostly and strange, as if painted on the cold stone landscape. Jonathan, the Master of Raven Tower, seemed to have significantly more substance, though. He watched her with his pen raised, as if ready to take notes, and when he spoke, his voice sounded absolutely normal. “Ah, the elixir’s wearing off? I thought it better to underdose rather than overdose.”

Astolfo offered the cookie again, and she took it and bit down, closing her eyes to savor the dark sweetness. As the flavor rolled over her tongue and the crumbs dissolved in her mouth, she thought, _Maybe I am a dragon here. I don’t really know myself very well._

When she opened her eyes again, the study’s reality had strengthened, until it took close scrutiny for her to detect its _thinness_. She met Jonathan’s steady gaze, and tried to summon up the belligerent confidence of the dragon again.

“You could be lying to me, but I don’t think you are,” she told him.

He looked surprised. “No, of course not.” He gave her a wry half-smile. “We may be a predatory world, but we try not to be wicked about it. Lying would poison the very foundations we’d like to lay.”

“Does that mean you’ll let us all go if I refuse you?”

A look of true pain crossed his handsome face. “Ah. Well. Canceling a spell in progress can be tricky, especially when the spellcalled entities have a semblance of free will. But I’d at least help you to a fair chance of breaking their enchantments. Even…” he winced, “Merlin.” Then he brightened. “Though as a matter of fact, we believe he _must_ be participating willingly on some level. We could hardly bind somebody of his power without his permission. If he alone stays with us, that would still significantly speed up our timeline.”

Ren’s stomach hurt for some reason, and she put the rest of her cookie on the desk. “All right. I’ll take that help.”

He hesitated, and then said a little sadly, “Do you thus so casually send us back to our scavenging while you return to that doomed world? It grieves me to see that.” He flickered and his other self said in a creaky voice, “Such a terrible waste, Jonathan—” before flickering back again.

The imaginary strength of the dragon wasn’t enough. Ren lowered her gaze. “I’m not from that world, but I can’t abandon it.”

“Do you really think you were sent to save it?” he inquired, with genuine curiosity.

It was the only thing she was certain of. “I was sent to save _something_. I was sent to help.”

“Hmm. A proposal, then. If the little girl and Merlin both wish to remain, would you also stay? I would expel the other humans if you wished it.”

Ren’s stomach twisted again, and she recalled Merlin teasing her about her refusal to make hard choices. “I… I don’t know. Maybe if Ritsu truly wishes to stay… but Merlin…” She closed her eyes. “You don’t need me for empowering him anyhow.”

Jonathan didn’t respond and when she opened her eyes, he was regarding her with gentle sympathy. “The forefathers of our tradition seem to subsist on broken hearts, don’t they?”

Ren flushed and looked away. “I’m not a mage.”

“Ah, yes, so I noticed. You are some form of magical creature.” Jonathan’s voice morphed into Gilbert’s. “Perhaps a flavor of fairy we haven’t seen—” and then Jonathan finished with, “Although fairy is just another word for an otherworlder, of course.”

Without looking away from the bookshelf, Ren said, “What do you know about how Ritsu’s world is dying?”

Jonathan’s chair creaked as he leaned back. “I imagine it started the way we all start. It found a common adaption, too: the opening of holes in its fabric, through which infusions of nutrients could be absorbed from the greater multiverse. It isn’t a _healthy_ adapation; in fact, it’s one of the markers we look for in donor worlds. And yet instead of collapsing early, it lingered, opening more and more holes. It’s more holes than world, now. We—and other Great Powers—have let it carry on as a curiosity and an object of study. We’ve been aware for a while that its fragile lacework was on the point of disintegration. And then the situation changed. The world started sealing its holes.”

Ren looked at him sharply, and he caught something of her thoughts on her face. Shaking his head, he said, “An attempt, perhaps, to save the world, but it can’t work. The remaining fabric is far too weak to endure the tremblings of fate without the flexibility the holes provide. And the world is now utterly dependent on the power the holes leak. Sealing them will simply kill the surrounding region.” He grimaced at her expression. “I’m sorry. You did ask.”

Pulling her legs up to her chest, Ren curled around them silently. After a moment, she tilted her head back to look at Hyde. He looked down at her, and then traced an artery from her collarbone to her ear with one black-gloved finger. “Why’re you looking at me? _I’m_ not born from the hopes of humanity.”

Ren’s mouth twisted and she glanced at Astolfo: still smiling, bouncing on his toes, waiting for her next move. A complete idiot, who’d throw himself off a cliff just to see if there was an invisible bridge.

And yet… and yet, what was magic, but a manifestation of the hope that things might be _different_ than the world said they had to be? Astolfo existed because even if there weren’t invisible bridges, the _hope of flying_ was prerequisite to the fact.

The paladin met her gaze and winked at her again, as if he could read her thoughts. Embarrassed, Ren looked back up at Hyde again. “You’re in favor of survival at all costs.”

“For you?” Hyde asked. “Hell yeah. For me?” He shrugged. “If I were still alive, yeah. Jekyll’s the suicide, not me.”

Jonathan coughed. “Why don’t you talk to your other companions? I’ll cast a spell to guide you to them.” He made a face again. “To be honest, there’s one I’d rather you simply take away with you. He had potential at first, but something broke in him after we collected the others.”

 _Cú_ , thought Ren. But Hyde said sharply, “Hey. You said you’ve got a Grail War going on?”

“Yes, that’s right,” said Jonathan lightly. “Not for world-shaking stakes, but we’re taking notes. It’s a rather refined ritual, and we think we could make something of it.”

Ren’s brow furrowed. “But a Grail War has seven Servants. You’ve only got four from me.”

“Technically, five, although one of them is very resistant to our spell.” Jonathan nodded at Hyde. “Some local legends have filled in the empty slots, though. I suppose it’s not exactly the same as you’re used to, but it should achieve similar ends, on an experimental scale.”

Ren cast her gaze back to Astolfo and quoted him, “ _Some ritual thing_ , Astolfo?”

“I didn’t want to confuse you,” hedged Astolfo, grinning. “Anyhow, it’s not _real_ real. You’re my true Master, not Jonathan and Gilbert. Same with the others. It’s just… just a play-act of the real Grail War that the fairy pulled out of us.”

“Hah!” said Hyde. “ _They_ all think it’s real, though. Jekyll sure does.”

“That’s the spell?” queried Ren to Jonathan.

He inclined his head. “It is, and breaking it requires some delicacy, lest their sanity is irrevocably shattered no matter where they are. I’ll provide a guide to them, but you must be their guide home.”


	35. Ríastrad

The Master of Raven Tower sent Ren out with a ball of foxfire and Astolfo as her guides, and Hyde followed along. Going down the stairs seemed much faster than going up had been, and they emerged into a sunny afternoon on a paved walkway surrounding a large campus quad.

Young adults in student uniforms dotted the autumnal leaf-covered lawn, some with animals or otherwise inhuman companions flanking them. None of them gave Ren and her companions a second glance, even though she and Astolfo were both dressed very unusually in comparison. Somehow, walking along as if she were just another student in this fantastic school made her very uncomfortable. She didn’t belong here and she didn’t want to be tricked into thinking she did.

A familiar voice caught her attention, and she frowned, looking into the quad. After a moment, her gaze settled on a cluster of three students she recognized. All of their familiars had shrunk down to the size of housecats, but they were the champions of Lord Kirri all the same. The big bearded Theory looked rather unusual in his student uniform, but Shina and Blue Violet fit right in, even though Blue Violet had managed to hang onto their mask.

Ren paused, looking at them. “Are they participating in the Grail War?”

“Nope,” said Astolfo, and tugged on her hand. “Come on.”

But the ball of foxfire had more to say, in Jonathan’s voice. “No, this environment is serving as a sufficient interface for their part in the harvest ritual, and they’re happy here. Happier than I would have anticipated, honestly.”

Ren pulled her mouth to one side, dissatisfied. But there was no point in contemplating the fate of her enemies when her allies still needed to be reclaimed, so she kept walking. Eventually they stepped off the paved path and went around one of the big stone buildings and to a small door in a small building in a copse of trees.

Jonathan’s voice said, “This leads down to the cave where we’ve confined the monstrous one. I’ve notified his caretakers to get out of your way. He’s under a secondary spell at the moment, one designed to allow us to all stay safe. It can’t compete with the stronger magics bound into him, but while they’re passive, it serves. Once he’s dealt with his current crop of toys, you’ll have your chance to interact with him. If he kills you, it will quite real, but I assume you can handle him.”

“I have to,” said Ren, and went through the door. The tiny building contained little more than some shelves, some crates and a large stairwell leading down. Without looking back, she went down the stairs, and felt both Hyde and Astolfo follow her.

The stairs opened onto an excavated stone tunnel, which curved back and forth as she hurried down it. At the far end, there was another door, criss-crossed with chains, but with the padlock that secured them open—presumably left that way by Cú’s caretakers. She wondered how they’d departed, for it wasn’t the way she’d come. As soon as she touched the door, her fingers tingled hot and cold, and a bestial roar echoed in her ears.

“Well? Go on,” said Hyde impatiently, fidgeting with his knife.

“There’s an observation booth, Renriri,” said Astolfo reassuringly. “It won’t actually stop him from getting to you, but it’ll at least slow him down.”

That not-very-comforting thought made Ren roll her eyes, but she pushed the door open and stepped through.

The main of the space beyond was a large, round chamber with a shallow dome for a roof, and a constructed stone alcove near the door with tiny windows looking inward. A niche cut into the wall housed a large machine with a life-sized mannequin of clay standing in the cage at the front. And in the center of the room sat Cú Chulainn, Child of Light, in a most monstrous guise.

From his hips down, he’d become almost draconic, complete with a spiked tail and enormous, taloned feet that made his spike-covered legs seem even longer. His bare chest spasmed with too much knotting muscle for his frame, and his face had been contorted by a perpetual grimace.

Before Ren had a chance to do more than blink and take in the room, Cú bounded to his feet, snarling like an animal. In response, the cage containing the clay figure ejected its contents, which began to magically duplicate around the room.

Cú threw himself at the nearest duplicate, tearing it apart and sending chunks of dried clay flying. He left the first barely more than a stain on the ground before moving onto the next, and the next.

Ren took the opportunity to move into the observation alcove, and peeked through one of the viewports. Softly, she said, “Cú?”

Softly, but he heard her anyhow, pausing mid-rend and turning looking the alcove in a way that told her he couldn’t see it. Then he howled, and turned to yet another clay person.

Ren remembered him from the night now. He’d come at her call, balancing on the end of her bed and bending down to look at her without a hint of recognition in his face.

_“Who are you?” he’d asked, and then gave her a devil-may-care grin. “Oh, I know who you are. You’re somebody who’s made a very bad mistake.”_

_“I’m your Master,” she’d said blankly. “I summoned you.”_

_He’d laughed. “Yeah? Then who’s that?” Gesturing with his spear, he’d pointed out the pale little figure standing behind him: the blank-eyed little boy Ichigo, with a small winged humanoid creature riding on his back. Its hands_ melded _with the boy’s chest, vanishing into his flesh, and the dark aura that radiated from them had induced instant panic._

_“Cú, come back to me,” she’d begged, and a Command Seal had vanished from her hand._

_He’d stared at her, his eyes widening, and then everything had happened so_ fast. _He was going to kill Ichigo, kill Ritsu’s little orphan child, and she’d shouted, “_ No! _” The second Command Seal had vanished, physically wrenching Cú out of his attack lunge. And then he’d changed, writhing against the energies swirling around him, and Merlin and the others had appeared…._

The mannequin machine dispensed another enchanted clay figure, and the berserk Cú went to work on those. If a frenzy could be said to be methodical, his was.

“I understand what happened now,” Ren whispered, and once again, Cú looked around for her.

“Careful, Master,” said Astolfo in a perfectly normal voice, and the mannequin machine promptly dispensed four more clay figures, filling the room with a crowd of duplicates that forced Cú switch to wider, sweeping moves for his massacre. “Even when he hears you, he thinks you’re part of the illusion trapping him.”

After a moment, Ren nodded and glanced to her two Servants. “I have to talk to him anyhow. Bring him down, Hyde. Astolfo, help if you can.”

Hyde gave her a nasty grin. “What’s in it for me if I do?”

With an exasperated look, Ren said, “Oh, come on. Are you _kill kill kill_ or….” Another story bubble popped, another legend she never wanted to summon. “Or Edward Teach?”

Hyde laughed, before moving so fast it seemed like he’d simply vanished from the alcove. She heard rather than saw his first strike at Cú Chulainn: the * _schnack*_ of his knife slicing across the other’s shoulder back before striking his armplates.

Cú flickered and then blurred backward. Hyde appeared near the mannequin machine, and then kicked a pottery leg atCú as the bestial berserker charged him. Cú didn’t bother to dodge it. It shattered around him, but by then, Hyde had already moved again, slipping behind Cú, striking, and just barely missing.

Once again, they both blurred around the arena, Hyde’s knife clashing against Cú’s spear in a flurry of blows. Astolfo gave a low whistle. “Wow, they’re both really fast! I’m in trouble if you expect me to keep up.”

Concentrating on the flashes of movement and the brief flickering exchanges of blows, Ren said, “Do what you can. I need him down but not out.”

“Oooh,” said Astolfo, and a lance materialized in his hand. “That, I can do. Well, if I’m lucky.” He gave Ren a teasing smile, and stepped around the side of the alcove.

Meanwhile, Hyde careened around Cú, twisting impossibly to avoid a swipe from Cú’s growing claws, spinning himself around one of Cú’s spikes and slashing once again across his opponent’s side before tumbling away. Every bit of the movement had seemed like an accident until he landed, laughing, squarely on his feet and made it a dance.

For a frozen moment, the two of them evaluated each other from across the arena.

“Hey hey, big guy,” Hyde taunted. “I’ve got the girl, you know. You thought you could protect her from me but hah! You can’t!” He wove to one side as Cú leapt toward him, then leaned in and whispered something Ren didn’t catch. Whatever it was made Cú roar and move so fast that Hyde left his vest behind, along with a long strip of his shirt and his skin.

Hyde cackled as he did some fancy footwork. “Yeah, too slow! I’m all full up from _tasting the Master_ while you’re drunk on lies and playing with dollies.”

Cú blurred again. Hyde hopped on the spear that slashed under him, but he paused to make a face at Cú before jumping away, and Cú caught his ankle as he did.

Even as Cú smashed him toward the ground, Hyde wound himself up and kicked Cú in the face before landing so hard on his own shoulder he bounced. When he sprang to his feet and flipped backward, he listed to one side, as if he’d taken serious damage from the blow.

Eagerly, Cú lunged after him and Hyde, now on the defensive, just barely managed to keep out of the berserker’s grasp. But they were both moving _so fast_ that it wasn’t until Hyde casually slipped over the spear like a gymnast over a single bar that Ren realized that the smaller berserker was entirely within Cú’s guard. But it didn’t matter; Cú batted away his wild strikes easily….

…all the way up until Hyde dropped his knife, caught it with his other hand—the hand on his supposedly injured arm—and slammed the knife into Cú’s exposed side, leaving it there as he sprang away.

It would have been a killing strike on a human,but Cú hardly noticed, flipping his spear around and pulling his arm back.

“Nyah nyah!” said Hyde, and pulled another knife out of thin air. “Let’s do that again!”

That was when Astolfo, circling the edge of the arena, flung his lance wildly. It arced and and seemed about to fall short. Then Cú shifted position to throw his own spear, moving his leg right to where Astolfo’s lance could pierce his oversized foot.

Although barely a glancing blow, it had an immediate effect as the wounded foot dematerialized, leaving only a ragged, ghostly edge at around mid-shin. Cú lost his balance, but caught himself almost immediately with his tail, whirling on one foot to evaluate his other attacker.

“Shoot,” said Astolfo. “I should get me one of those.” The lance reappeared in his hand and he ran around the edge of the arena again.

Cú lifted his spear again, but as he did, Hyde landed on the butt end and sprang from there to one of the spikes growing out of Cú’s shoulder plates. He launched a kick at Cú’s face. Cú somehow slid sideways and Hyde had to turn the kick into a back somersalt away again.

Then the big berserker staggered again as Astolfo crowed, “Got his tail! Annnnd…..”

Cú swept the arena with a murderous, hate-filled gaze, before falling over heavily as his other foot also dematerialized.

“Quick!” shouted Astolfo. “We have to hold his arms! Master!”

Ren jumped out from the alcove and ran over to where Astolfo and Hyde each held down half of Cú. Avoiding the spikes on his thrashing legs, she knelt down between Hyde and Astolfo and clapped both hands on Cú’s tattooed cheeks, feeling the prickly scruffiness even male Servants apparently acquired after a long day.

Ren breathed, and _let_ herself feel his skin, his warmth, as she looked at him upside down. He snarled at her, twisting back and forth, trying to bite her, but that didn’t matter. She breathed again, letting the adrenaline that filled her fall away, carrying off Astolfo’s frantic chatter and Hyde’s harsh breath. She was simply _there_.

“Cú Chulainn,” she whispered, and he froze, panting, only his eyes moving wildly as he tried to find her. So she closed her own eyes and reached out to him with her mind, as she had before.

_Ren,_ he cried in crazed anguish, driven by the contradictory Commands she’d given him: _Return to her_ , _without killing the boy to break the spell._ So he’d tried to destroy the world around him, and couldn’t see it to save it.

She felt what he felt: her hands on his cheeks, and the terrible nature of the madness they’d inflicted on him. They’d not just warped his mind, but poisoned his bodily sense of where he was. What he observed in his surroundings and what he felt never matched up: not just in the individual sensations, but the _skinsense_ of place. It was a sense Ren had never even imagined before, a sense that told a body and soul what _world_ it was in.

Ren touched his face and looked at herself through his eyes. She felt her breath on his face, and he felt what she felt. His thrashing stilled, but his breath came hard and painful.

“No spikes, Cú,” she murmured, and the most aggressive parts of his armor dematerialized. She slipped over his arm, past Hyde, maintaining physical contact with Cú and straddled his stomach. She found as she ran her hands down his torso that Hyde’s knife had vanished, but the injury remained, raw and gaping.

Ren sighed and ran her hands back up to Cú’s spiky hair, far too stiff for her to finger comb.She gave it a try anyhow, vaguely conscious of Cú’s scarlet eyes fixed on her. But seeing from either set of eyes wasn’t her priority, and so it was both difficult and uninteresting. If she could fix his _skinsense_ , every other part of the madness enchantment would break in turn. And if she could bring him back to her, that would resolve the contradiction of the Command Seals.

She could see now why Jonathan had said cancelling the ritual would be tricky. If the victims didn’t want to be free _and_ have a guide back, the dismissal of the dark fairy’s power would simply leave them even more lost and confused than ever. The Command Spell could have been the guide, if she hadn’t countered it. Now, she had to do it herself.

Carefully, she stretched out along Cú’s body, pressing herself against him. She hoped that somehow sharing her sense of her own skin, and her sense of his skin, and vice versa, would help. As she dug her fingers under his shoulder guards, she muttered, “And this isn’t a seduction attempt, either.”

Cú gave a rusty, pained laugh. _I kind of wish it was_ , he whispered into their shared headspace. _Better than this._ Hyde and Astolfo must have decided he was no longer an active threat, because Cú’s arms closed around her heavily. It was a hopeful realization.

“Shh,” she told him. “You’ll be okay. Can you dematerialize and stay with me until we get home? Once we get out of this spell, everything will be better.”

_Not yet_ , he whispered.

Ren scratched his shoulders instead of answering, resting her chin on his chest. It felt _very_ nice against the confused exhaustion still twisting his body. Dreamily, he whispered, _This would work even better if we were both naked. Skin to skin, ah yeah…_

Ren listened to the obscured sound of Astolfo talking at a high rate and at a higher pitch, contrasted with the low rasp of Hyde’s annoyance. She murmured, “Not a good idea right now.”

_Right_ , he whispered a moment later. _Motivation._ And few moments after that, he said creakily, “Get up. You’re going to wear my spirit form like a really tight sweater.”

With a tired sigh, Ren released her mental connection with Cú and rolled off him. He promptly dematerialized. She could only tell he was near, not if he was indeed nestling around her so intimately, but when she opened her eyes, Hyde was looking down at her. Accusingly, he said, “ _I_ wanted to do that.”

Ren reached up to tweak his nose and then sat up as he scowled. For some reason, every muscle in her body _ached_ , even in her face, and there was a particularly bad bruise on her side.

“Good job, Renriri!” caroled Astolfo. “You’re the best!”

“You’re not too bad yourself,” Ren told him. “And you, Hyde…” She smiled at him, even though her cheeks hurt, and his scowl deepened. It reminded her of Merlin, a thought she promptly pushed away. “You were wonderful. Thank you.”

Hyde’s scowl softened into a smirk. “I’m thinking I want a manicure, too. Total spa package.”

“Hot springs!” said Astolfo enthusiastically. “I’ll find some. But what are we doing now, Master?”

“Jack,” said Ren simply. “Next, I have to save Jack.”


	36. College Girls

Ren and her companions spent almost an hour wandering around the campus, inspecting the strange and wondrous sites of a magical college, before Astolfo cheerfully admitted he didn’t actually know where Jack was and why didn’t he ask the Master of Raven Tower?

The summoned ball of foxfire didn’t help the atmosphere when Jonathan said, “What? You’re all the way over here? No wonder there’s—well, come along.” They followed the foxfire back to the other side of the sprawling campus to one of the long four-story dormitories, where a loose clump of people had gathered to watch something that clearly concerned them.

The _something_ turned out to be a young man with blond hair and a stressed smile plastered across his face trying to catch Jack with his school jacket. Jack had lost her overcoat somewhere and her underlying garb of vest and panties seemed to worry most of the observers. Murmurs of “That poor child,” and “What did he do to her?” and “Should we tell the dean?” and, most curiously, “Oh, Flat, what have you done _now_?”

Meanwhile, Jack, looking like a confused but desperate cat, darted away from the blond man as he tried to drop the coat over her. She seemed attached to the dormitory, however, because she didn’t flee through the observers but only stopped out of the man’s reach.

“Come _on_ ,” said the blond man, speaking through gritted teeth. “You’ve got to be cold like that, right?”

“Nuh-uh,” said Jack, looking around nervously. Her gaze passed over Ren without a flicker of recognition, and Ren’s heart sank.

Hyde chortled. “Who’s the pretty boy?”

Astolfo only shrugged, putting his hands on his hips, but the ball of foxfire barked, “Flat!” Everybody present reacted as if electrified. The crowd immediately scattered and Flat jumped and then cowered.

“Master! I was just trying to get some clothes on her!”

“Leave the Servant alone, Flat,” said Jonathan’s voice severely.

Sulkily, Flat said, “Easy for you to say, you’re not going to be punished by a swarm of girls if she gets harassed by some pervert.”

With a snort of laughter, Hyde said, “What do you think you are, kid?”

Ren crouched down to look at Jack. The child stared back at her uncertainly.

“Where are your knives, Jack?”

“Here,” she said, and moved her hand to show one of the four she habitually armed herself with. “Who are you?”

Instinct, and the dreamike memory of what had happened when she’d told an enchanted Cú she was his Master, made Ren hedge around that question. “A friend. Why are you out here all alone?”

Jack scowled and looked away, as if she’d decided to ignore Ren. But then she stole a glance at her and blurted, “Too noisy inside. Too many rich ladies squabbling and we’re not supposed to kill them. Ritsu said we could play outside as long as we stayed near the building.”

Bitterly, Flat said, “They collared me and told me to keep an eye on her until they were done.” He then added, “Which I wouldn’t have minded at all except she’s _practically naked_.”

“Ritsu?” Ren glanced up at the looming dormitory.

“Ah,” said the ball of foxfire softly. “The little one almost instantly rejected her assigned Master, imprinting on Ritsu instead.”

Unable to resist indulging a morbid curiousity, Ren asked, “Did anybody die?”

The foxfire bobbed up and down in a shrug-like movement. “The students are volunteers and only their reflections are present within the ritual space.”

It was an odd non-answer but it was enough for Ren to realize that she didn’t owe anybody any apologies for the consequences of messing with her Servants. She returned her focus to Jack, who was both twisting her hands together around the knife she still held, and glaring at the world. If Ren could get close enough to give Jack the hug she so clearly needed, she could guide her the same way she had with Cú, but Flat had demonstrated how challenging that could be. She didn’t have the aid of the power of the Command Seals, but on the other hand, Jack wasn’t currently trying to kill anybody.

“You have pretty hair,” she said, just to nudge things in the right direction.

Jack gave her a skeptical look. “Why’re you talking to me?”

“Uh. You remind me of somebody I know. Flat, no—!” But the blond student with no apparent sense of self-preservation had snuck up behind the little Servant with his jacket out. Jack whirled, slashing with her knife. She sliced through the jacket neatly, and she sliced through Flat, too. Ren certainly saw the blade pass through the space where Flat had been, anyhow.

But Flat jumped backward, yelping in surprise rather than pain, and no blood stained his uniform’s white shirt. He did pat himself down frantically before slumping as the tension drained out of him. Meanwhile, the ball of foxfire hissed while both Hyde and Astolfo laughed their idiot heads off.

“You’re supposed to be out after being struck like that, Flat,” scolded the foxfire. “If you keep breaking the rules, you’re not ever going to graduate.”

“It’s not like I cheated, sir,” protested Flat. “I just adjusted the magic a little.”

Ren was suddenly uncomfortably reminded of Merlin, which pushed her into saying to Jack, “Will you take me to meet Ritsu, please?”

Jack looked her over and then nodded. “Okay. But they can’t come.”

Hyde scowled and Astolfo pouted. Ren sighed at them both. “You can come in if I scream.”

“You’d start a riot if you did go in,” advised Flat. “Women’s dorm, you know. They’re like Furies if you do ‘em wrong.”

“Hah,” said Hyde darkly, but before he could further share his thoughts, Ren hurried inside the dorm with Jack.

* * *

The dorm lobby was dim after the bright outdoors, and the few young women passing through barely gave Ren and Jack a look despite their outlandish clothing. However, when they were halfway up the second flight of stairs, a girl above them shrieked and three of them came flying down the steps to surround Jack.

“There you are, you naughty little sweetheart,” scolded one of them. “Mustn’t play truant.”

“We’ve put together the most adorable outfit for you!” said another.

“It’ll even match your cute knives,” said the third.

Ren paused, her heart in her mouth, waiting to see if any of them got slashed. But although Jack looked extremely put-upon, she didn’t attack. Instead she gave Ren a desperate look.

“Excuse me,” said Ren promptly, making her way through the cluster to Jack’s side. “She’s taking me to see Ritsu.”

All three young women looked at her, and then the first, a girl with bouncy chestnut curls said cheerfully, “You can come along too, then. Come on, Jackie!”

But Jack hung back as the girls flowed around her, reaching out to take Ren’s hand. Startled, Ren froze, and then shook her head. The physical contact part had been easier than she expected, but she couldn’t do the mindtouching now, with these noisy strangers around. Instead, as they climbed the stairs together, herded by the girls, she asked, “You don’t want new clothes?”

Jack whispered, “Kinda do. But they’re so loud. Like bad mommies before they’re bad.”

Ren couldn’t parse this and knew she needed to. “What do bad mommies do?”

Jack was silent until they finished climbing the stairs and their escort started herding them down a broad, extremely lived-in hallway with laundry hanging in open doors, duffel bags in the hall and complex thaumaturgical calculations written on the walls with random notes in different handwriting.

“Some bad mommies hurt you and throw you away,” said Jack in a low voice. “But the worst bad mommies lie about it first. They tell you they’ll take care of you, and then when you’re being dragged away, they don’t even _notice_.”

A chill ran down Ren’s spine. She didn’t have to ask to know that in Jack’s world, mommies were not permitted to make mistakes. Even if Ren did manage to guide her out of the enchantment, would she even understand what had happened? Or had Ren lost her trust forever?

“All right, you scamp,” said the girl with chestnut curls. “Here’s our room. We have the most adorable outfit for you.” Fearlessly, the girl picked Jack up and twirled her around, before saying over her shoulder, “Miss Ritsu’s the next door down, helping people with their homework.”

Ren narrowed her eyes as Jack was bundled helplessly off into the girl’s room. She was having a harder time with this situation than she’d realized. She could no longer be certain that the stealing of her Servants had happened _last night_ and in fact she wasn’t even sure what _last night_ meant here. And she couldn’t help feeling like despite her sulky expression, Jack was _better off_ here with apparently dozens of big sisters to spoil her.

_Careful…_ came Cú’s sleepy mental voice. _It’s all a lie. The only true thing here is our bond to you…_

Ren frowned, her steps arrested by Cú’s words. But surely it wasn’t _all_ a lie. Jonathan’s ball of foxfire had led her first to Cú and then to Jack, with bonus Ritsu. Unless there was a deeper game afoot than she’d seen…

_The spell_ , said Cú silently. _It’s got a life of its own. Uses what’s around it. It really wants to use you._

Slowly Ren continued down the hall, stopping outside the next half-open door. A buzz of laughter and conversation emerged. When Ren peeked in, she saw half a dozen young women sprawled on the floor with books, binders and little kits of magical implements, while upon the bed near the window sat Ritsu in a slightly oversized version of the older girls’ uniforms. One of the other students knelt next to the bed while Ritsu inspected a notebook before smiling as she handed it back.

Ritsu… but she had golden fox ears poking out of her orange hair, which twitched and turned toward the door. Her vivid eyes sparkled. “Serendipity! You decided to transfer in after all?”

Ren froze once again. Cautiously, she said, “Ritsu… you remember me?”

Ritsu gave her an exasperated look. “Of course I remember you. Even if you’re a brat sometimes, you’re still my sister.”

Ren’s hands and feet felt cold, and her head started aching. She leaned against the door frame. “I’m not your sister.”

Ritsu wrinkled her nose at Ren and gave a little grin to the girl nearest to her. “See? A brat sometimes.”

All of the students stared at Ren curiously, and the one closest to Ren said, “Aren’t you proud of your sister? It’s so rare for a prodigy of her caliber to come along.”

Ren closed her eyes, her stomach twisting, remembering Ritsu’s repeated complaints about not being appreciated at home. She’d told Jonathan she’d consider staying if Ritsu truly wanted to stay… but this _wasn’t true_.

Was it?

Ren couldn’t remember her own past. Absently she felt her own head. Maybe she _was_ a dragon girl just as Ritsu was now a fox girl. Maybe everything in the Summoner’s Castle had been a dream. How could she tell?

_Not so good_ , muttered Cú.

_No,_ thought Ren. _I remember you. But I don’t know how to fix this._

The trick she’d done with Cú definitely wouldn’t work on Ritsu, and Ren wasn’t even sure she ought to try. Was it right to drag Ritsu, clearly in her element, back to a dying world? Was her world even dying, or had she been wrong to trust Jonathan about that?

She needed advice, advice about magic and illusions, from somebody she trusted.

Cú’s dematerialized wince was tangible. _I wish I could help you instead._

Ren worried her lip, glancing at Ritsu laughing with one of her companions. Then one of them looked out the window and said, “Hey! There’s some kind of fight going on out there!”

Instantly, all of the students crowded to the window, flinging it wide so they could lean out. Ritsu stood on the bed to peer over their heads and then gave Ren a strange little smile. “It’s your friends. I wish Jekyll would come back…”

_Hyde and Astolfo._ Ren’s lower lip trembled. “I have to stop them. I’ll… I’ll come back to talk to you more later, Ritsu, okay?” She phrased it as a question, but she fled without waiting for an answer.

Bursting out of the double doors of the dormitory, she saw only the new, larger cluster of students watching the fight, although she heard the clashing of weapons and Astolfo’s laugh. A moment later she caught a glimpse of Astolfo flipping backwards above the audience’s heads.

Frustrated, angry and afraid, she made her way through the crowd, noticing but not really processing how it seemed to part for her. As soon as she could see Hyde and Astolfo both clearly, she cupped her hands to her mouth and shouted, “Hey!! Stop that!”

Astolfo, mid-lunge with a sword in hand, windmilled his arms as he skidded to a stop, and then fell on his butt, while Hyde, twisting around his opponent, converted the move into a flip that left him kneeling almost at Ren’s feet.

Ren was neither impressed nor soothed. “Well?” she demanded.

Astolfo’s sword vanished and he put his hand behind his head as he started laughing. “Hyde got bored and wanted to go find you so I thought I’d entertain him.”

“You were upset,” muttered Hyde, his head down. “Figured I could help one way or another. All these fake people. I could have cleared them right out.”

Ren pushed her fingers through Hyde’s fair hair and watched his shoulders tighten further. She didn’t want to encourage him, but they’d given her the shove she needed to extract herself from a situation she’d lost all control over.

Astolfo hopped over, landing like a frog. “Where’s Jackie? And Ritsu?”

Her fingers clenching in Hyde’s hair, Ren said, “I… I can’t free them yet.” Taking a deep breath, she forced the words out. “First, I need to talk to Merlin.”


	37. Sabbatical

Hyde glanced up even though Ren still had her hands twisted in his hair. He bared his teeth as he said, “Oh goodie. My knife has a date with his throat.”

The ball of foxfire lingering nearby coughed and bobbed up and down. Ren glanced at it and then down at Hyde. Slowly, she smoothed down the hair she’d spiked up. “He can’t talk if you cut his throat.”

“Then I’ll wait,” suggested Hyde. “I can start with some other parts first. Mercy isn’t part of the plan, anyhow.”

“Why are you so pissed at Merlin, Eddie?” asked Astolfo curiously.

“Butt out or I’ll cut your nose off,” Hyde told Astolfo flatly as he stood up, which had exactly the wrong effect.

Astolfo bounced closer. “Oh, come on, now I really want to know. Or shall I guess?” His head swiveled between Hyde and Ren. He started muttering to himself. “Hmm. Well, it’s not _that_ … well, mostly not that. But maybe it starts there?”

“Astolfo, read the room and put a sock in it,” advised the ball of foxfire.

“I hate this,” muttered Hyde, crossing his arms. “This is what Jekyll’s good for. Being sensitive. Nice. Bored. And _fuck_ , I need Merlin to get that floppy little ingrate back again.” His hand snaked out to catch Ren by the arm. “Tell you what, I’ll give up on Jekyll if you decide you want Petals to die, yeah?”

Ren twisted her hand to catch Hyde’s arm. “It’s a deal.” She glanced at Astolfo. “You’re unhurt?”

“Aww, Eddie wasn’t really trying to hurt me,” said Astolfo. “Just some bumps that are already better. I’m coming along, so don’t try to stop me.”

“I don’t want to let you out of my sight,” said Ren firmly and extracted herself from Hyde. “But I want you to stay out of it, both of you, even if Merlin and I get into it.”

Hyde shrugged, looking away again, while Astolfo looked dubious. “You think you can handle him?”

Ren’s stomach churned, but her voice was steady as she said, “Better then either of you.”

* * *

The ball of foxfire escorted them to a lecture hall in an airy modern building. The sign beside the door said, “Tricking Your Way To The Top, A Lecture Series by Visiting Professor MERLIN from the AGE OF FAIRIES: Lecture 1: Lying With Flowers.”

Jonathan’s voice said, “His class should be ending now… best step out of the way of the door.”

An instant later, the double doors slammed open and a stream of excited students flowed past. It seemed to go on a long time, and when the crowd finally thinned, Ren saw the truly enormous room beyond. A few students clustered around the table and podium at the center of the hall, and in the middle of them Ren caught a flash of Merlin’s prismatic hair.

Quietly, she moved closer, angling herself so she could watch, his floral scent tickling her nose even from a distance. Merlin’s usual garb had vanished, replaced by a pearl gray suit with a tie that matched his eyes. The jacket had been tossed on the table he leaned against. He laughed easily as he talked with his fans, who were almost all women.

As Ren watched him flirt, wrapping everybody present around his finger, the churning in her stomach faded away until she felt nothing at all: not anger, not jealousy, not nervousness, nor pleasure or hope or fear. He raised so many emotions in her normally, but looking at him like this, from the outside, she felt nothing at all. She was perfectly cool.

_Ah, my lady…?_ said Cú, unsettled by something. She had no idea what it could be. The ball of foxfire had vanished again, but Astolfo and Hyde had placed themselves high in the seats, earnestly pretending to be the well-behaved Servants they normally weren’t. Everything was fine.

Merlin finally noticed her waiting and sent off his fanclub smiling with, “And here’s somebody I’ve been waiting for, so I’ll see you all later.”

Ren didn’t notice as the students left, watching as Merlin gave her a quizzical look and then moved to stack some random papers on the table. Finally, he finished and leaned on the table again. “Well?”

Her limbs like lead, Ren moved closer. “You’ve been waiting for me?”

“Of course,” he said, smiling, before his smile faded. He straightened, peering at her. “Ah, no, what you’re doing to yourself isn’t any good for either of us.”

“ _Why_ have you been waiting for me?” she inquired, ignoring his meaningless second statement. Lilacs. He smelled of lilacs and freesia.

Merlin cocked his head and stepped closer. “That’s what one does with fiancées, isn’t it?

_Hooboy_ muttered the peanut gallery in Ren’s head. She ignored it. “Ah, is that what I am?” She was ice, that was what she really was. “Well, let’s pretend for a while I’m a student.”

Spreading his hands, Merlin said, “You’re not jealous of my fanclub, are you? I was just being polite, honest—”

“I don’t care.” She stepped past him and sat down at one of the two chairs arranged at the table. “Let’s pretend I’m a student, here to ask you a few questions about your speciality.”

He remained where he was, staring at where she’d been, until suddenly he looked at her, smiling again. “All right.” Sitting down across from her, he leaned forward on his elbow and said, “What can I do for you, Miss Student?”

“Illusions,” Ren said crisply. “How do you break them?”

“Incapacitate or at least seriously distract the illusionist,” said Merlin promptly.

Ren shook her head. “It’s not that simple. The illusion persists. It’s inside their minds and under their skin.”

“Ah. Delusions, not illusions.” Merlin looked throughtful. “Well, if they want to emerge, it’s simple. Not easy, but simple.” He cocked an eyebrow at her. “I think you know that already.”

“And if they don’t?” asked Ren, a hitch in her voice.

Calmly, Merlin said, “Usually, you have to hurt them.” High in the seats, Hyde looked up alertly, eager to assist. Merlin went on. “Some kind of shock might do it, too.”

Ren met his gaze steadily. “That’s what you’d do?”

Merlin laughed as if she’d made a joke. “Me? I don’t know if I’d meddle in a situation like that! But if I did, I have other tools at my disposal. Sometimes a lie about a lie can become the truth, you know? Or something close enough to live with, anyhow.”

Ren remained silent, thinking, until Merlin leaned over the table to tuck a wisp of her hair behind her ear. “Are we still playing Office Hours or can we go get some dinner? Perhaps without your entourage? I did send mine away,” he added teasingly.

Leaning on her hand, Ren returned to studying his face. “Do you really believe you’re engaged to me? And you like it?”

She caught the flicker in his eyes before he said, “Yes, I do. Don’t you?”

“I can’t quite work out what you get out of all this, though,” mused Ren. “Coming here, going along with their magic, but _this_ is what you want?”

“I’m starting to get the feeling we’re not actually talking to each other, Serendipity,” said Merlin with mock severity. “Is it so unbelievable that I’d want to be engaged to you?”

With a flash of temper, Ren said, “It’d serve you right if I said no and started planning the wedding.” She found herself wanting to interrogate him, to see how far back the story went, and how many details he’d made up. But that was a dangerous rabbit hole, and led to the lair of a beast formed of all her fears that would utterly consume her.

Merlin took both her hands in his. “Tell me what’s wrong,” he commanded, in a voice of unusual authority.

Ren took her hands back again, tucking them under her arms. “No, _you_ tell _me_ what’s wrong.” She wanted to dump him, break off the pretend engagement, just to provide that hurt he said was neccesary. But she didn’t really believe that would do it. She was fairly sure if she tried he’d just laugh at her, tease her, and spin her another lie. If he _wanted_ to stay here, she’d never be able to pull him out. She could barely even reach him. She certainly couldn’t hurt him, and she was confident Hyde couldn’t either, despite his big dreams.

Merlin stood and came around to pull her out of her chair, looking at her closely. She glared at him as her anxiety and frustration started trickling back from the hole she’d pushed them away.

“You don’t trust me,” he finally announced, and sighed. His eyebrows swooped down as he considered more. “Well…” he said, and then shook his head. Instead he put his hands on the sides of her head and leaned in to kiss her.

And, although it unearthed all the rest of her buried emotions, she let him. In the situation, she couldn’t even imagine doing anything else.

He started with a light, delicate brush of his lips over hers; a flick of his tongue and continued into a slow and shallow exploration of her mouth, as if he might break her by accident. It was certainly a far more gentle kiss than Hyde had ever given her. Her hands came to rest on his chest, but she didn’t shove him away. This was part of the lie, an _obvious_ part of the lie, she knew that and yet she couldn’t resist it.

But after a moment or two, he spoke against her mouth. “Do it, then. What you came here to do.”

Ren pushed then and he released her, giving her a calm, almost pleasant, expectant look. She took a deep breath. “I’m not engaged to you, Merlin. None of this is real, but even if it was… I’m not engaged to you. Pretend I’m flinging the ring at your head. We’re over. You’re single. No dinner for you.”

Merlin’s eyebrows drew together in a frown, and he looked from side to side as if confused by something. His mouth twisted and he said with a wave of his hand, “This isn’t working the way I expcted it to.”

The two of them were suddenly alone in the lecture hall, without even the distant noise of the rest of the campus. The shadows of the hall became strange and twisted, as if the architecture was far more twisted than it appeared. Conversationally, he said, “You know, I didn’t expect you’d take so long to get to the point.”

“Great, I surprised you,” said Ren flatly, her heart pounding hard as the warmth of his kiss faded from her mouth. “Are you going to be annoyed at me again?”

“Oh no,” he assured her. “I’ve learned. I’d only end up with whiplash. Hmm.” He looked back and forth again, as if he expected the lecture hall to be different.

“Why did I have to _get to the point_ anyhow?” Ren demanded. “What _was_ the goal of this little charade?”

Merlin smiled at her distantly. “Because I really am under an enchantment, Serendipity. You’re thinking I could have fought harder against it in the beginning and we wouldn’t be in this mess, and you’re right! But I was curious and I didn’t think it would be a challenge to escape later. Unfortunately, they have some pretty old magic here.”

“You’re talking to me here, but you’re still enchanted,” said Ren slowly. “So what is this, a dream?”

“Something like that. Even enchanted, I’m still _me_. I’m just convinced I’m on a sabbatical, intent on enjoying your company,” he gave her a sidelong look, “even as grumpy as you are. And I have the _strangest_ dreams. Like this one.” He spread his arms. “Gettting dumped by you was supposed to snap me out of it. But it doesn’t seem to have had much impact. Are you sure you really put your heart into it?”

“Of course I didn’t,” snapped Ren. “I don’t want to drive you off, I want to take you with me and put you to work. The fact that you can talk to me like this, here, now, isn’t helping your case any. I can kind of understand it, but it’s pissing me off.”

“Hmm,” Merlin said a third time. “You may have to take me with you as is, then. Put up with my dream-ridden lovelorn self. Won’t that be fun?”

Ren clenched her fists. “No. It’ll be really—” She stopped. Merlin’s gaze had dropped from her face to her chest. “What?”

“What happened to your top?” he asked.

She looked down and saw the rip in her neckline the ambitious Hyde had torn when she’d kissed him outside Jonathan’s Raven Tower office. It wasn’t indecent. Except for the ragged edges it could have been by design. She opened her mouth to explain and then hesitated over what she actually wanted to tell Merlin. It wasn’t as if she owed him details. She wasn’t sure he _deserved_ details.

A shockingly dark look flashed through his eyes when she paused, an emotion intense and powerful she couldn’t quite identify. Anger? Jealousy? Pain? Hunger? Something only known to half-incubi? She didn’t know, but for an instant it transformed him.

Then he said, smiling suddenly and back to himself, “Actually, I think I see my way clear. A bit of a delayed reaction for my waking self. I’ll send you back now, and if you can wait for me, I’ll rejoin you shortly.”

Before she could agree, the sound and lighting of the original lecture hall came rushing back and Merlin vanished. Ren looked around to see Hyde and Astolfo watching her intently. Hyde’s eyes narrowed as she turned toward him, his gaze going to her chest just as Merlin’s had. She glanced down again and saw the ripped fabric had been neatly hemmed on each side of the tear. It had decorative stitching along the hems and lacing hanging loose from four eyelets, all just as if it had been designed that way from the beginning.


	38. Merlin Musing

Merlin, half-incubus, an alien, immortal connoisseur of emotions, knew from the outside the flavors of _anger_ , of _jealousy_ , of _envy_ and of _desire_. When he’d realized that Serendipity had resorted to fooling around with Hyde, he’d tasted all four. He didn’t know _where_ they’d come from. But the _regret_ that had flowed over him after that dark jolt… that was his. He owned it. He knew.

At least it wasn’t the peculiar hurt Artoria brought him. And there was no point in blaming Serendipity for his own mistakes. But he was glad to step beyond her too-seeing eyes for a moment all the same. He slid between the layers of illusion that surrounded them all, until he was safely hidden from all eyes Servant or magus.

Illusion and delusion: a dual-lobed deception carefully crafted to keep its victims comfortable as they were used to siphon off their world’s energy. A vast project involving hundreds of magi of every experience level, it was far more complex than the Grail War it was weakly attempting to simulate. That wouldn’t go anywhere, of course, but he was certain that given the time they’d work it out and add it to their repetoire of energy processing tools.

Not that he cared one way or another if they did. They’d provided an attractive diversion at a time when he’d wanted some distance from Serendipity and her effect on him, that was all. He’d gone along with the force trying to steal him away as a break, a change, a chance for perspective. And it had all been pointless because he’d constructed his entire escape scenario around her. He’d spent that day of dream-life eager for her appearance, for the opportunity to make her smile at him again as she’d smiled at him in the castle courtyard.

Idiotic, that. He’d constructed the key to his awakening around her outrage, not her smile. If she’d smiled at him, he might have stayed there forever.

The vast illusion commanded by the Master of the Raven Tower had been constructed of many, many layers that fit together like a complex pop-up book. Merlin absently devoured one of them just to weaken the structure of the spell, and tasted the bitter flavor of long and fruitless work. This second world, full of clever, scrupulous people, was interesting, no doubt, and in a different situation he’d happily take advantage of the breakthrough to have an adventure.

In fact, he’d done so occasionally before he’d accepted the imprisonment in Avalon. Once he’d avoided Morgan le Fay that very way. She’d been very eager to make him taste the flavors Serendipity had evoked.

Or had it been another woman?

It hardly mattered now. He wasn’t what he’d been in those days. Once he’d wondered but now he knew: nothing living remained the same forever, not even him. Change had crept over him, so subtly he had trouble distinguishing what had altered… but that he’d changed was undeniable all the same. _Regret_ told him that.

Merlin followed the flow of the illusion to the center, where the human child bound by the dark fairy anchored the entire spell. The dark fairy rode the child’s back, with its own hands sunk into the child’s chest in an impossible melding of flesh.

Settling his spirit form near the kid, Merlin observed the qualities of the binding magic and the illusion magic, making a few tiny adjustments. The fairy’s eyes narrowed and the tendons in its arms tightened as if it clenched its fists within the boy’s flesh. The boy trembled and Merlin tweaked the magic again.

Among other things, his tweak was a summons, and as expected, the Master of Raven Tower appeared before him: two men standing back to back, bound even more inextricably together than the fairy and the child. The taller of the men, Jonathan, said wistfully, “You’re going to leave us, then?” and Merlin once again tasted that bitter flavor of fruitless work.

“I couldn’t save your world,” Merlin said lightly. “Only make its disintegration more pleasant. You’d hate me by the end.”

“You’ve saved other worlds,” countered Jonathan.

But Merlin shook his head. “Fewer than you imagine. Even in your world, it wasn’t I who saved Britain.” He put his hand on the child’s head. “Now. She’ll come for him before she’s done. Treasure the knowledge you’ve gained thus far. You won’t get much else.” He started to move away and then turned back. “Oh yes. Since you consider yourself a gentleman, do get your people out of harm’s way. I wouldn’t want to break them.”

Jonathan inclined his head, without any sign of the frustration Merlin could taste so readily. An intriguing entity, one Merlin would enjoy speaking with more another time. But not now. Instead he returned to the vicinity of Serendipity, loitering in the layer right beyond human sight to study her.

Although she had a strong and healthy body for a human, the spirit within it glittered and shifted unevenly. Sometimes it blinded him, and sometimes it was as dim as an animal’s, but always it seemed to him _fragile_ , as fragile as her body. When he imagined her in the arms of a brute like Hyde, he worried. He’d need to find her somebody nice. Somebody gentle. Somebody more like Jekyll _without_ the inner demon.

He considered her other Servants briefly.

Cu Chulainn? The very idea irritated Merlin, a sensation he’d become quite familiar with since joining Serendipity. He’d learned not to bother trying to analyze why, lest he make everything worse.

Anyhow, when one took fighting and sex out of the picture, the Hound of Chulainn was far too dull for Serendipity. REJECTED.

Astolfo? Like Jekyll, he’d be gentle, and he was very skilled in romance—but also like Jekyll, other aspects of his personality automatically disqualified him. REJECTED.

The so-called Count of Monte Cristo…? Merlin had felt his touch on the layers of illusion even when he’d been blinded by his own dream. The Avenger observed from somewhere nearby. He’d have to evaluate the man more when they met again. That would happen soon enough, as soon as the Avenger’s energy had drained away. Hmm…

Merlin lingered, musing on Serendipity’s love life a while longer, as he’d once mused on the affairs of the Knights of the Round Table and the Paladins of Charlemagne. He liked seeing a well-executed love story, just as other men enjoyed a fine wine. If he could arrange that for his protégé, perhaps that black jolt that had snapped him free of the delusion would never reoccur.

She’d need somebody gentle and patient, yet clever and witty. Strong. Protective. Wise. Powerful and empowering. Attractive. Somebody who would make her laugh, and never, ever break her heart. Somebody she’d cling to as they kissed her…

A paragon, in other words. And he, Merlin, her Zeroth Servant, simply wouldn’t accept anything less.

Having reached this pleasant conclusion, he rematerialized just outside the lecture hall in the same suit he’d been wearing, fluffed his hair, checked his cuffs and then peeked in through the door. “Well? How long are you going to keep me waiting out here? Ritsu and Jack are still lost, you know.”

Serendipity’s eyes flashed as she glared at him and strode over to the door. He let a grin curl his mouth. By the old gods, even taking into account the flashes of irritation and regret, she _delighted_ him. She was absolutely his favorite new toy. The sharp edges just added to the fun.

Hyde and Astolfo fell in behind her, and Hyde gave him a particularly hostile look before lowering his head to sniff Serendipity’s hair, his hands brushing her waist. Merlin met his gaze, intending to smirk. Instead that unwelcome black cocktail of flavors jolted through him again.

The magus turned quickly away. Hyde definitely had to go, or be replaced.

But Serendipity caught the sleeve of Merlin’s jacket as she said sharply, “Don’t run away again!” When he raised his eyebrows at her, she flushed and said, “Whatever’s going on, don’t run away again. I need you. Help us all get out of this Wonderland and you can tease me however you like.”

Hyde’s eyes narrowed, while Astolfo yelped, “Master! That’s not—”

Merlin took her hand off his jacket sleeve and laced his fingers through hers. “Oh, don’t worry, Astolfo. It’s not like I’ve been waiting for her _permission_ to do that.” Her hand, small against his own, tightened in his, and he adroitly dodged her kick to his shins without releasing her. “Ren! You shock me! Didn’t you just say you needed me? How much help would I be if you broke my leg?”

He brought her hand to his mouth, keeping one eye on Hyde’s knife, and kissed her fingers. “You may not accept being my fiancée but I’ve accepted _you_ as my Master, Ren. I won’t run away again. I’m sorry I did so in the first place.”

Although he said the words lightly, her eyes widened anyhow, and he knew she’d once again seen beyond his smile. So be it. When he’d arrived by her side, he’d had no idea what the invitation he’d accepted would bring, only that for an unknown time it would fill his world. He knew now of both the sharp edges and the delight, and he accepted it willingly.

He really would have to find that paragon, though. He didn’t like those dark jolts at all.


	39. Creatures of Luck and Darkness

As they traipsed across the campus one more time, Merlin stubbornly maintained his clasp on Ren’s hand. She didn’t hate it, but just so it wouldn’t go to his head she made a couple of token efforts to free herself anyhow. He breezily ignored them, only glancing over her head to where Hyde scowled at him.

Ren noticed the tension between them, but it didn’t seem any different to her than the tension between Cú and Hyde, and only mildly different than the tension between Astolfo and Hyde. Berserkers were supposed to be a challenge to manage and she accepted Hyde’s possessiveness as the price of his strength. As long as he wanted to please her, she could handle him.

“It’s such a nice evening, in such a pleasant environment,” Merlin announced. “We ought to enjoy it. Who knows when we’ll have such a chance again, back in that crumbling Summoner’s Castle?”

“We’re not staying,” said Ren, bristling. Then she sagged. “Unless we break Ritsu free of her delusion and she _wants_ to stay. I don’t know what to do then.”

Hyde shrugged, his hands in his pockets. “Don’t give her the choice. You want to go back, so she goes back. She’s small. Any of us can carry her.”

“This isn’t a healthy world for little Miss Ritsu to stay in,” said Merlin decisively.

“Yeah, but neither is her own,” said Ren darkly. She looked around and spotted a bench along the quad. The open space had emptied of most of its occupants as dinnertime approached, and a light wind stirred piles of red and golden leaves. “Let’s actually sit down for a minute and get this hammered out so we have a plan when we see her.”

Merlin beamed at her. “I did say we ought to enjoy the evening.” He towed her to the bench, seated himself and held out his arms to her. She ignored the invitation and sat at the other end of the bench, leaving space for a third between them. But Hyde crouched at her feet where she could put her hand in his hair again, while Astolfo flopped on the ground. The Rider put his arms under his head and one leg up in the air, leaving anybody inclined to be curious with no question as to what he wore under his armored tunic.

Instead of looking, Ren gathered her thoughts. “The other Master told me Ritsu’s world is shredding apart—”

“Yes,” said Merlin calmly. “Looking at the overall structure of worlds isn’t my niche, but since coming here, I’ve applied the technique.”

“And you think we should take her back to that?” Ren asked, daring to hope he had a good reason, an _answer_ to the indecision gnawing at her.

“I’m not going to make that decision for you, _Master_.” Merlin’s voice was bland. “But here in the world of the Raven Tower she would be much less than she could be in her own world of Summoner’s Castles. And there are mysteries there we have yet to solve.”

“She’s lucky,” argued Ren. “What if being taken by this world is her luck saving her from an unavoidable doom?”

“You think her luck means nothing bad ever happens to her?” asked Hyde darkly.

Astolfo said idly, “I’m lucky,” and lifted his other leg out of the way just as Hyde kicked at him. “But trying to predict luck is kind of a waste of time. You just have to live your life and trust that it’ll all work out in the end as long as you try your best!” He cast his gaze over Ren’s shoulder and added, “Hi, Flat!”

Ren glanced back to see the blonde young man who’d been troubling Jack strolling behind the bench, his arms clasped behind his head in an exaggerated display of innocence. “Oh, hi there, interesting strangers from another world.”

In an amused voice, Merlin said, “You might as well join us, young man. I can tell you have something you want to say.”

In a flash, Flat had insinuated himself on the bench between Ren and Merlin, his face aglow. “Thank you, interesting strangers! I thought your conversation about luck was very interesting!”

Astolfo toed Flat’s shin. “You’re lucky too.”

Flat looked surprised. “Me? No, no. But I wrote a paper on luck once.” He looked proud. “It got a failing mark. Well, I for incomprehensible, but _basically_ that’s a fail **.”**

“So she should listen to you why?” asked Hyde nastily. He hadn’t liked Flat’s seating choice.

Flat shrugged. “Well, it did get the Master of Raven Tower to come out of his study to hit me on the head and they say he hasn’t done _that_ in thirty years. And now he’s my personal mentor.”

“So what do you think? Is luck a form of divide guidance?” Merlin asked with an indulgent note in his voice.

The young man scratched his chin. “Depends. There’s lots of different things people _call_ luck. Divine protection, for example, which might react to whatever happens to keep the blessed one safe. And then there’s destiny, which nobody here likes to talk about, and which I admit seems _pretty random_ , but definitely exists. Destiny doesn’t care if you get hurt as long as the ultimate goal is achieved.”

Merlin nodded, a distant look in his eyes. “As a sometimes-agent of destiny, I can confirm that’s certainly true.”

Flat gave Merlin a curious look, but happily accepted his gesture to go on. “Then there’s kind of varying degrees of what I call true luck. Mechanical luck, really. There’s no goal, and no guiding hand, just a mechanistic manipulation of immediate events to produce the most wholesome outcome for the bearer. Some luck is focused on immediate consequences without any ability to predict long-term consequences. Other kinds of luck can sort of… evaluate the parameters of its bearer and algorithmically choose to improve those even if there’s a short-term penalty.”

“Oh my god,” muttered Hyde and buried his head against Ren’s leg, covering his ears with his arms.

Flat didn’t notice, caught up in the excitement of his explanation. “It can get really tangled. There’s also, oh, micro time jumps and intuitive divination. And luck’s hereditary, too, just like magic circuits. I really think a lot of more complex spells involve directed luck algorithms.” Suddenly he slumped hard, dropping his hands between his legs. “Everybody _hates_ that idea, though.”

Merlin patted Flat on the head and cocked an eyebrow at Ren over his curved back. “Do you feel as if you have a better grasp of Ritsu’s situation now?”

“No,” said Ren crossly. “I feel like a potential shortcut was snatched away from me.” She twisted her hand in Hyde’s hair. “I’m not afraid of losing. I’m not even afraid of dying if it accomplishes something. The problem is that I have no idea _who to fight_ to fix something shattered beyond repair.”

“What about that guy you summoned me to help with? The one who’s hosting the wolfie?” asked Astolfo. “You’ll probably still have to fight him.” He sat up and tickled Flat under the chin until the young man looked up again.

Ren opened her mouth to point out how unhelpful that was, and then stopped, thinking. Her magic theory was weak, but one of the core elements of the stories she knew was that the object that enabled the summoning of Servants, known as a Holy Grail, was a wish-granting artifact. While it wasn’t the original Holy Grail of legend, it was a crucible that channeled immense power and then gathered it back up again. Once the cup brimmed over, it could be used to create miracles.

She thought about Artoria Alter within Tora, and Lobo with Lord Kirri. There were more like that, no doubt about it. And why?

Slowly, Ren said, “What if somebody else is also trying to harvest energy from Ritsu’s world, via the Grail War structure? That could explain why the Sovereign Servants are possessing their Masters: to process energy from Ritsu’s world—”

Astolfo interrupted, “That’s such an awkward name for a world. Call it Kintsugi.”

Ren caught her breath as she drew the parallel between the tattered world and a broken bowl mended with gold.

Merlin bestowed a happy smile on Astolfo. “Well done.”

But Hyde snorted. “That’s optimistic. Usually something shatters, it’s trash.”

“We have to do our best,” Astolfo responded cheerfully.

“It’s a good name,” agreed Ren. “It’s a reminder. And I think if we can find the Holy Grail behind the Sovereign summons, we can use that as the gold.”

“This is all so confusing,” said Flat happily. “I’m glad I came along and totally accidentally overheard you.”

Ren, far more interested in Merlin’s thoughts on her theory, mostly ignored this. “Well? What do you think?”

Merlin gave her a gentle smile and she could instantly tell he had quibbles. But all he said was, “A solid idea. Shall we go find Ritsu now and tell her the good news?”

She could tell he had quibbles, but Ren was so exhilarated by having a goal and even more importantly a _vision_ of a world mended with gold that she jumped right to her feet. “Yes, lets!”


	40. Lines of Gold

Ritsu of Chalice Village had suffocated in her native village, buried beneath the indifference of her community. She might have grown old and died there, unvalued save by the children she cared for, except for the black bird that had appeared on her window sill one morning holding an envelope addressed to her, containing an invitation to the Raven College of Magecraft and Magic. It had been a dream come true.

The invitation had changed everything. She’d arrived at the College only yesterday and already she knew it was the only place she could really learn to stretch her wings. Yes, she was much younger than most of the other students. But she’d scarcely been there an hour before she’d stumbled into an experimental ritual and rescued a darling little girl who reminded her of her orphans. If Ritsu hadn’t been there, the gods only knew what terrible events little Jackie would be involved in.

She’d been able to help more experienced students with their homework, too. The texts they had seemed absurdly simple after years of squeezing every bit of magical knowledge out of storybooks and fairytales. One of her floormates had told Ritsu she was just like the magicians of old, who had to re-invent magic from nothing but stories in order to bring the Dark Age to an end. Not one of them rolled their eyes, told her to go play with dolls or to go back to her fiction. They all seemed to genuinely _like_ her.

The campus cafeteria served amazing food. Even her simple dinner of rice and fish had a freshness she felt had been lacking in recent meals back home. She couldn’t think why that would be, given that Chalice sat beside a lake while the College’s fish had to be transported in, but it wasn’t a puzzle she wanted to think about, not when there was so many more interesting puzzles in her shiny new stack of textbooks.

After supper, she walked back to the dorm, where she’d left the antisocial Jack napping, chatting with her new friends. As they got closer, she saw her sister and her own coterie of friends waiting for her at the entrance.

One of Ritsu’s friends gave Ritsu an oddly sad look and said, “I suppose you ought to talk to her. I think we made her nervous last time, but… if you want… we can stick around anyhow?” She finished on a defiant note, and then glanced over her shoulder at a distant ball of foxfire.

Despite a butterfly twist in her stomach, Ritsu shrugged. “It’ll be okay. My sister’s not awful, just frustrating sometimes. I don’t even blame her. I’m not the easiest little sister to have, you know? And she taught me a lot about doing the right thing when I was little.” Ritsu frowned, looking at her sister. She _knew_ that was true, but somehow it didn’t feel quite right.

“She’s not supposed to be here,” muttered another of Ritsu’s friends, the one who had made Jack’s new clothes. “She wasn’t invited.”

Uncomfortable with that remark, Ritsu said, “I’m glad she’s here, though.” She scanned Serendipity’s companions and brightened. “You see, she’s here with Professor Merlin. She’s his fiancée, you know.”

A gasp swept her group of friends. “ _Her_?”

Ritsu rolled her eyes and waved at Serendipity. “You all go on in and I’ll catch up later.” The girls trickled away and as Serendipity and her companions approached, Ritsu tried to calm her pounding heart. She loved it here and her sister loved her, so why did she feel so convinced Serendipity would try to take her away from all this?

With her own dormmates gone, the campus seemed emptier than she’d yet seen it. That guy called Flat lingered behind Serendipity’s companions, but he was the only student she could see, even in the distance. It made the campus seem unreal, like a picture she’d stepped into.

“Hi, Ritsu,” said Serendipity, her voice odd. “Where’s Jack?”

“In my room,” said Ritsu, butterflies fluttering in her stomach. She looked over Serendipity’s companions again: Professor Merlin. Astolfo, who served the Master of Raven Tower in some way, but who _also_ had arrived from Chalice with Serendipity. And… and Jekyll, who she’d had a soft spot for. Except this wasn’t the Jekyll she knew. Her Jekyll had always looked at her in a way that made her feel warm and seen. Serendipity’s companion _leered_ at her in a way that only compounded her sense that something was very wrong.

Breathlessly, trying for normality, Ritsu asked, “Are you having a nice visit? How long are you staying?”

“Not long,” said Serendipity, giving her a measuring look Ritsu felt certain her sister had never given her before.

A fanciful, terrifying idea unfolded in Ritsu’s mind: that her sister wasn’t her sister, just as Jekyll wasn’t Jekyll and Astolfo somehow fit in two places at once. Instinctively, she focused on Merlin, who seemed exactly as she recalled him, and who fit in her memories perfectly.

“Are you two getting along?” she asked him.

Absently, Merlin said, “As much as usual. Ritsu, have you had any bad dreams recently?”

Ritsu hesitated and then shivered as a chill wind picked up. “Let’s go up to my room. I don’t like it out here.”

But inside her dorm, it was even creepier. Every single door had been firmly closed, and absolutely nobody moved through the halls. When Ritsu opened her own door and found Jack playing with the buttons on her new suit of clothes—shorts, and a fitted uniform vest and tie over a clean shirt—the relief that swept through her made her weak at the knees.

“Jackie!” She fell on the little girl, hugging her, and Jack endured it passively, peering over her shoulder at Serendipity and her friends.

Then Ritsu glanced up at Serendipity. Only she and Merlin had entered Ritsu’s room, with the other two lingering in the hall. “I’m sorry. I think I must be a little homesick or something, because everything suddenly seems so strange.”

Serendipity’s countenance brightened. “Oh? Would you like to go home?”

Ritsu shook her head fiercely. “Not at all! A little disorientation here is better than how alone I was back in Chalice.” Her heart twinged at the way Serendipity’s face fell, but she had to remain firm. This was her life, after all.

Merlin said, “The war back home isn’t going well. You’re probably better off here.”

Ritsu’s stomach flip-flopped. _The war_? She couldn’t at first remember what he was talking about. But even as she reminded herself of Serendipity’s mantra that _Merlin lies_ , she remembered… something. It was oddly fuzzy and far away, but her orphans had come from somewhere, hadn’t they?

“But what happened to your familiar?” Merlin asked.

Ritsu frowned. _Familiar_. An image of a golden foxlike creature flashed before her eyes and her chest warmed. But then another image replaced the foxette: a dark fairy with wings like eaten leaves and its hands plunged into—

“No! Stop it!” Ritsu covered her ears with her hands, squeezing her eyes shut. “I like it here. I don’t need a familiar!”

“Merlin—” began Serendipity in a strangled voice.

“Don’t waver, Ren,” said Merlin cheerfully.

“I’m not. Not about our fight, but if she’s really happy here—”

“It’s not as simple as that.” Merlin’s voice softened and Ritsu had to stop holding her ears to hear words spoken with a hypnotic lilt. “She claimed responsibilities before she came here. Even if you left her alone, the responsibilities remain. They’d rise up from the depths of her heart to haunt her, though veiled by the stories she’s accepted.”

As Merlin spoke, the texture of the world around Ritsu _shifted_. Her skin prickled and the horrible foreboding that she was dreaming swept over her. Except… except she was _here_. She could feel it. This was _her place._ She reached out to touch the desk next to her bed, closing her fingers around the edge.

Jack said, “Ritsu?” and gave Serendipity and Merlin a suspicious look.

“Where did you come from, Jackie?” asked Ritsu. Her memories of the moment—only yesterday! when she’d rescued Jack now seemed fuzzy and unreal.

“I was summoned,” said Jack, confused. “I’m your Servant. S’posed to fight for you, but you told me not to.” She gave Serendipity a sidelong look. “That lady’s like my Mommy somehow.”

The certainty struck through Ritsu like lightning: Serendipity _was_ Jack’s mother-figure. Ritsu had rescued her from a magical ritual, that was true, but it had been a ritual stealing Jack from Serendipity.

Why had she forgotten that?

“Go to her,” said Ritsu quietly. “Give her a hug. Maybe she is.”

Doubtfully, Jack said, “My Mommy wasn’t nice.”

“Well, Serendipity is!” said Ritsu sharply, her eyes stinging. She felt like something loomed behind her, and if she didn’t look, it couldn’t fall. But Jack was right there, along with Serendipity’s concerned gaze, and that awful horrible sense of wrongness.

She missed her sister. It hurt and it had hurt for a long time. And here, it would never go away. But that sense that she _belonged_ here was so strong. She couldn’t shake it off. She felt wedged into place, with the roof about to fall in.

Slowly Jack went over to Serendipity, who knelt down and held out a hand. “You don’t have to hug me if you don’t want to, but if you take my hand, I can help.”

Breathing shallowly, Ritsu nodded in response to Jack’s look over her shoulder. If this was all a joke, a game, a trick by Merlin, she’d find out now.

Serendipity and Jack clasped hands, and Serendipity’s eyelids fluttered closed before opening again, glinting strangely. “Here we are, Jack. Remember me?”

Hesitantly, Jack put her free hand on Serendipity’s chest over her heart. Then, with a wail, she flung herself onto Serendipity and started sobbing on her shoulder.

Serendipity collapsed into a sitting position, tension visibly leaving her frame as she cuddled the child Servant. For a long moment, she focused exclusively on Jack. But Merlin kept his gaze on Ritsu.

“Well?” he said.

Ritsu shifted uncomfortably and stilled as the world pinwheeled around her. “I’m stuck,” she whispered.

“Only because you won’t move,” said Merlin calmly.

Frustration flashed through Ritsu. “I _like_ it here! Can’t I please stay?”

Merlin shrugged. “Certainly. You’re a talented girl. If you really wished it, you could send us away.” He turned his lilac gaze to Serendipity, crouching down beside her to say something in her ear. They looked just like a family for a moment: Serendipity holding Jack, Merlin with his arm around Serendipity.

But they weren’t, Ritsu knew now. Oh, maybe they would be someday. There was _something_ there. But Serendipity was prickly and sharp and intense, not engaged to Merlin, and _not her sister._

_Gods_ that hurt.

“Incidentally, Ritsu. You might ask yourself _why_ you don’t really wish it,” Merlin said absently as he stroked Serendipity’s dark hair.

Ritsu flopped over on her bed and put her pillow over her head, crumpling her fox ears. Ask? She didn’t have to ask herself. She _knew._ She was a genius. She did things nobody else would, or could. And she’d left people behind in the darkness back home, people she loved, people she was responsible for. She was _brilliant_ and running away from her responsibilities was betraying herself and her inborn gifts.

Stay here, eat good food, spend time with people who respected and admired her, stuff her head full of a dozen kinds of magic? _Heaven_.

But heaven was for those who had finished what they had to do on earth, and she’d barely begun.

Ritsu rolled over, freeing her fox ears, and touched them. She’d had a familiar, nameless but hers. It had merged with her somehow. She could feel it within her, nestled around her heart.

“Ritsu?” said Serendipity, her voice thick.

Ritsu sat up and forced herself to smile. “It’s all right. This is a dream, right? A trap of some sort?” She took a deep breath. “I’m ready. Tell me how to wake up.”


	41. The End Of The Rainbow

Serendipity tried and failed to give Ritsu an encouraging smile, and instead buried her face in Jack’s hair. Her relief at Jack’s return and Ritsu’s consent was painfully overshadowed by the twist of Ritsu’s brave smile.

“You don’t,” said Merlin. “Not yet, anyhow. Can you guess why not?”

Ren glanced up to see Ritsu’s brave smile becoming a ferocious scowl. “Ichigo.”

“And Lord Kirri’s warriors, too,” noted Ren. “Although they’re not quite in the same situation as Ichigo.”

Merlin sighed at her, a little too dramatically. “You want to save your enemies, too?”

“Did you see much of Cú?” Ren inquired acidly. “From what I understand once we rescue Ichigo, Kirri’s servants are going to be dumped back in the normal world again as the ritual collapses. Except they’ll still be utterly delusional. Delusional warriors are _dangerous._ Sorting them out isn’t kindness, it’s pragmatism.”

“But guiding somebody back from the delusion requires a personal connection,” pointed out Merlin, his eyes crinkling in a half-smile. “There isn’t much you can do for them.”

Ren shifted Jack off her lap so she could grab Merin by his mantle. “I _said_ I wanted you to do some work for me, didn’t I?”

“Helping Ritsu see the truth wasn’t enough?” protested Merlin, grinning like an idiot.

Disgusted, Ren pushed him away. “You’re smarter than that.”

“Am I?” asked Merlin, his smile going strange. “I do wonder how much effort is required before I’m entitled to the kind of reward others get.”

Ren crossed her arms and said severely, “It varies according to ability.”

Merlin cocked his head, his eyes drifting to Jack. “Does it really?” He leaned away as Jack growled at him.

Ritsu flung her arms around Jack’s neck and gave Merlin a reproving look. “ _Jack_ is adorable. You’re just… fluffy.”

Merlin’s eyes grew wide at Ritsu’s words. He turned a wounded look on Ren. “ _Just_ fluffy?” but when he met Ren’s stern look he sighed dramatically. “Fine, fine. I shall go deal with Kirri’s champions, but I do expect some suitable reward later.” He vanished slowly, his hair last of all, muttering, “ _Just_ _fluffy.”_

Then, before his hair had vanished entirely he popped back in again. “Oh. You’ll need to go down to the foundation layer of the illusion to find Ichigo. Rely on Astolfo.” He vanished again.

Astolfo peeked around the door jam. “He’s gone,” he reported over his shoulder and Hyde rushed past him into the room.

“Smart to send him away, Master,” Hyde rasped. “Now what?” He caught Ritsu staring at him wide-eyed and narrowed his eyes. “Cute fox ears.”

Ritsu gasped and ducked her head. She muttered something but all Ren caught was, “…Jekyll…” and Jack patted her on the shoulder reassuringly.

Hyde barked with laughter. “Stay tuned, kid. He’s kinda my fox ears right now, if you know what I mean. I know how to get him back.”

Ren concentrated on the world around her, trying to again notice the seams, the flimsiness she’d seen once the Master of Raven Tower’s potion had worn off. She’d become used to them and they’d faded, but illusion still cocooned her. Briefly her dragon-self took over again and she wondered where a good place to hide her hoard would be. Then she saw the paint lines in the world, and knew she could push through them to the bleak gray world on the other side.

“What about Ritsu, though,” she wondered aloud.

Ritsu hugged herself, her fingers pressing white marks into her arms. “I can tell I’m in a dream, but I can’t wake up. I don’t even remember everything properly,” she admitted.

“How about if we pinch you?” asked Hyde, grinning.

“Eddie! She’s a kid!” said Astolfo severely. “I’ll help you, little miss.” He stuck his fingers in his mouth and whistled, and suddenly the dorm room was overflowing with hippogriff. A wing bashed Ren in the arm as Jack squeaked and dodged behind her. One giant clawed foot came down on Ritsu’s bed while the unreal creature squawked in annoyance.

“Down, Hippogriff!” Astolfo shouted. “Lie down!” The hippogriff squawked again, and Ren, pressing herself against the wall, felt certain the hippogriff was cursing Astolfo out. She certainly would be.

As the hippogriff carefully folded its wings and crouched down, Astolfo put his hand behind his head and laughed. “Eheheh, I suppose you all would have been happier if I’d called him outside. But it truly doesn’t matter. Inside and outside is all just pretend anyhow. And riding Hippogriff is the fastest way to get somebody already under the curse through the layers.” The Rider looked so ridiculously proud of himself that Ren wanted to pat him on the head.

Ritsu, pale-faced, put her hand on the hippogriff’s neck, but with an irritated little chuckle the hippogriff twisted its head and nudged her until she fell across its back. She shrieked as it rose up, spreading its wings, and held herself on by clutching at fistfuls of feathers. The hippogriff ignored her, turning to survey everybody else with a regal and imperious air.

“Oops,” said Astolfo. “He’s gonna flap his wings. Best if everybody else gets down to the foundation layer now!”

Ren glanced around nervously, and found Hyde grinning at her wolfishly. He held out his gloved hand. “I know what to do.”

“I have to do this myself, though,” Ren said, but took his hand anyhow. She could imagine getting lost halfway between the dream and the foundation, or in that weird dragon-self she’d awakened. But she couldn’t imagine accidentally shaking off Hyde once he had his hands on her.

“Right,” said Hyde, and his crimson eyes flashed as his hand grew cold even through the glove.

“Are you there?” demanded Astolfo. “Hurry, hurry! Ouch, don’t bite me, Hippogriff!”

Ren focused on what she’d percieved as paint lines proving to her that the world around her was no more real than a painted theater backdrop. She shook her head back and forth and then stepped forward, towing Hyde behind her. The world parted around her and the scent of old, dead air invaded her nose. Something crunched underfoot.

She looked down to see the scattered carpet of dead insects against the stone ground, and up to see the endless mists rolling around her. Then a mighty whoosh of air lifted her hair from her shoulders and she looked back to see the hippogriff lazily flapping impossibly large wings as Ritsu clung between its shoulders, her eyes tightly closed. Jack sat behind Ritsu, looking around with wide, puzzled eyes.

“Yay!” said Astolfo. “Let’s go this way.”

Hyde looked down in disgust. “What’s with all these bugs?”

Astolfo chirped, “Oh, that’s my fault. Don’t worry about it! I really think we should find Miss Ritsu’s little friend before Merlin gets bored!”

Ren thought about asking _how_ Astolfo was responsible for a carpet of dead insects but then decided she’d be happier not knowing. Instead she quietly followed the skipping Rider until they left the field of insects and started climbing a jagged slope of split stone.

Astolfo stopped suddenly and stooped down to pick a small lavender flower that bloomed from a crack. He sniffed it and then offered it to Ren, his words at odds with his courtly gesture. “Uh oh! Merlin’s already started breaking things down. Let’s hurry!”

Ren took the flower and also sniffed it. The scent made her remember Merlin’s mouth against her own and something wrenched inside. She let it fall, her hand tightening on Hyde’s, and surged ahead.

At the top of the slope, the boy Ren vaguely remembered knelt, with the dark fairy squatting on his back with an unwholesome smile. The fairy’s huge eyes swept over them and narrowed as the tendons in its arms clenched.

“Here we are,” announced Astolfo. “Can everybody see the child?”

Ritsu opened her eyes and then tumbled forward over the hippogriff’s head, squeaking, “Ichigo!”

The dark fairy giggled, but Ichigo, his face pale and his eyes closed, didn’t respond at all. Ritsu darted toward him and then collided with an invisible field, rebounding into Astolfo’s arms.

“Mine!” snapped the fairy. “Finders keepers!”

Ritsu’s brow furrowed. “I summoned you, didn’t I?”

“Hah hah,” gloated the fairy. “Tricked!” Its grin widened and abruptly a wave of despair rolled over Ren, so visceral it rocked her back on her heels. Ritsu too felt it, crumbling to her knees and pressing her hands against her cheek as tears sprang to her eyes.

Hyde caught Ren at the small of her back and she drew herself upright again, blinking at the dark fairy. Then she sighed. The negative miasma radiating off the fairy made her _tired_. She was just so _tired_ of this entire situation. And all they had to do to get out of here was get rid of the fairy.

Easy enough. Ren said, “I’d make a much better host than that kid.”

“Hah!” said the fairy. It seemed to have a pretty limited vocabulary. “Weak!”

“It’s true. Ask your boss. I’m like nothing else.” Ren’s voice was flat. She simply didn’t have the energy to try to make herself convincing. If push came to shove they’d just do it the hard way.

The dark fairy hesitated. Then, without warning, it jerked its hands out of Ichigo’s chest, leaving unbroken flesh behind, and darted toward Ren.

It was fast. But it wasn’t as nearly as fast as both Jack and Hyde. It wasn’t halfway to Ren before it turned into scraps of black disintegrating wing fluff.

_That’s a bad habit you have_ , _giving yourself up like that,_ Cú observed, as Jack jumped up and down on the fairy bits while Hyde watched approvingly.

Ren watched distantly as Ichigo gasped and then wailed and Ritsu stumbled over to him. Then her numbness was dispelled by a pang of sadness as Ritsu comforted her little foster brother. She’d been alone like that and who—

_No_.

The fragment of memory evaporated as Merlin’s voice echoed around them. “And that’s that!”

With a tinkling sound, the sky shattered. The world around them collapsed and a red dawn peeped through the wreckage, tinting the forest with blood.


	42. Papa Wolf

The little clearing Ren and her companions found themselves in had been roughly expanded by the pile of sleeping Sovereign champions and their oversized familiars at one edge. Merlin sat atop the tail of a sleeping dragon, kicking one leg. He still wore his suit, just as Jack and Ritsu also wore their new clothes.

Ritsu clutched the golden foxette to her chest with one hand while hanging onto a semi-conscious Ichigo with the other. The hippogriff had vanished. Although Ren had been puzzled for a moment, she decided it was definitely dawn and not twilight staining the forest, and so she wasn’t at all surprised when a spine-tingling wolf’s howl came from nearby.

“Ooh, that’s spooky!” said the cheerful blond youth in a schoolboy’s uniform who inexplicably stood among them.

Ren stared so hard at Flat that he felt her gaze burning a hole in his back and turned to give her a laughing wave. Then, controlling her desire to shake him until he teeth rattled, she checked on everybody else. Jack had activated her Presence Concealment and had a knife in each hand. Hyde loitered near the edge of the clearing opposite Merlin, his hands in his pockets as he absently kicked a tree. Astolfo bent over the sleeping champion pile, poking interestedly at Blue Violet.

_Cú_? _Can you manifest?_

In response, the lean blue form of the Child of Light shimmered into existence. Although he no longer had the tail of his berserk form, he seemed worn about the edges. But he held Gáe Bolg with confidence and of all her Servants he was the only one to look toward the origin of the howl.

Ren went to Ritsu. “Give me Ichigo.”

Ritsu pressed her lips together and then nodded. Ren scooped up the little boy in her arms and announced, “Leave the champions and let’s get back to the Castle right away. Flat, you can come—”

The snarl from the edge of the glade triggered a primordial terror and Ren’s mind went blank. Even crouching to spring, the Avenger Lobo loomed over all of the other Servants, and the shadowed form of Kirri on his back held a long, slim sword outstretched in each hand.

_What have you done to my children?_ It was a howl of anguish, not a question, and the giant wolf lunged directly for Ren, jaws snapping.

It wasn’t a strategic move, as Cú, Jack, Hyde and Astolfo all intercepted him. For a long horrible moment, the glade was full of a whirling fur-covered death machine that snapped at spears, knocked Servants aside, and ignored direct blade strikes to his thick pelt.

Then Ren became aware of Merlin’s hand resting lightly on her lower back and returned to herself. Her Servants weren’t winning easily, but they weren’t losing, either. Flat had scrambled up a tree and watched the battle with keen interest.

She glanced around and found Ritsu. “Ritsu, go back to the castle as fast as you can and wake Tora somehow. Flat!” She shouted loud enough to get the blond boy’s attention.

He threw himself down from the tree just as the wolf knocked Astolfo to the ground. Flat tumbled over Astolfo, but rolled on his shoulder and came up smiling at Ren. “This is very exciting!”

Ren pressed Ichigo into his arms. “Take this kid and…” she looked around. Ritsu had already started trotting down the animal trail. “And follow Ritsu. Don’t let anything happen to them!”

Flat took Ichigo. “Aww, poor little guy. Sure thing, boss-lady!”

Merlin hadn’t moved his gaze from the battle, but he murmured, “And now that your hands are free, will you throw yourself into battle as well?”

“Pfft.” Ren watched carefully, trying to follow the flow of the fight. Given that it was one Servant against four, it was a lot more even than she’d hoped. But, no, Avenger’s rider probably counted for another Servant, and her two best fighters were still suffering penalties due to their immersion in the dark fairy’s curse.

“With your help, they’d destroy him, wouldn’t they?”

Merlin’s head turned fractionally toward her. “Oh, certainly. Is that what you’d like me to do?”

Ren watched the fight a moment more. Everybody except Astolfo fought in absolute earnest, and even Astolfo seemed as serious as he was likely to get while playing keepaway with a big dog. But she could feel how much they were also enjoying the chance to stretch themselves against her enemy.

“Let’s try talking first. Can you make sure Avenger hears me?”

Merlin gave her a distant smile and waved his hand. “The microphone is yours.”

In a conversational tone, Ren announced, “They’re not dead, Kirri, only lost and sleeping.”

The Avenger snapped his teeth and threw his head from side to side as if something buzzed in his ear. But Lobo’s rider efficiently deflected both Cú and Hyde while turning to look toward Ren. Meanwhile, Jack took advantage of the distraction to stab Avenger directly in the eye.

Lobo screamed and went wild. Jack went flying with a rent across her torso, while Astolfo found himself caught between the giant wolf’s clawed feet. An aura of black flame flickered around wolf and rider.

“Everybody fall back!” snapped Ren. She couldn’t compel obedience with a Command Seal at the moment, but the order was enough to make them hesitate. Lobo lunged toward her as the architect of his torment, and hit an invisible wall inches from Ren’s face.

Merlin, his fingers still on Ren’s back, said in the face of the snapping, crazed monster, “Mmm, bad puppy. Talk fast, young lady.”

To the foaming, snapping fanged muzzle right in front of her face, Ren said, “If you want to save them, you have to relent.”

This had no notable impact on the frenzied Avenger, so Ren gave it one more try. It was possible he’d recover from defeat the same way Tora had, but he’d already hurt Ren’s Servants enough. She wanted the fight to end.

“Who’s in control? Kirri or the Servant? You can lose or you can learn.”

The shadowy rider on the wolf’s back lifted his head, his eyes sparking in a face like a statue’s. But the wolf didn’t stop raging, and flames of his black aura flickered through the invisible barrier keeping him away from Ren. This was a creature completely prepared to die in the process of inflicting as much damage on his perceived enemies as possible.

“Lady!” shouted Cú, his voice sharp with concern. Merlin’s hand trembled against her back.

Ren sighed and prepared to give the lethal order.

Then, from the forest, Artoria Alter stepped past Ren, her black blade thrumming between her hands. Ren blinked, startled at her rapid appearance, and then realized she must have set out from the castle on her own as soon as she sensed their return.

Without a word, Artoria Alter hit Lobo in the shoulder with the flat side of her blade, striking so hard the wolf, easily five times her size, was knocked clean off his feet and sent tumbling into the pile of Kirri’s lieutenants.

Artoria Alter then moved where Lobo had been, positioning herself pointedly between Ren and the wolf already staggering to his feet. Merlin pumped his fist and crowed, “I _knew_ you were a good girl, Artoria!”

The angle of Artoria’s back very slightly shifted, just enough to make it clear she was pointedly ignoring Merlin.

The wolf turned his head so he could see his attacker through his good eye, already beginning to snarl once again. But his rider lowered his swords momentarily.

Artoria Alter said flatly, “This is a mistake. If we kill you because you were too idiotic to listen, my Master will be displeased. More importantly, so will I.”

_You’re barely here_ , sneered Lobo Kirri. _You were more believable behind your walls._

“An irritation,” Artoria Alter conceded. “Come, then.”

The wolf lowered his head, growling as his injuries slowly closed over.

“Artoria,” Merlin whispered. “Give over to Tora.”

Ren’s gaze went to Avenger’s rider once again. He stared intently at Artoria Alter. Around the glen, Ren’s Servants had all pulled themselves back into fighting stances, ready to finish the battle. Judging from Hyde’s wild eyes, if it didn’t end fast, Ren would lose what control she maintained.

“I will not sheath my sword, Master,” murmured Artoria, apparently to herself. “Even if you insist—”

Making her voice a whip, Ren snapped, “Tora, present yourself.”

With a sound of digust, Artoria let herself be overwhelmed by her Master’s will. The blackened sword faded from her hands and her body and coloring subtly changed until Tora was once again at the helm. Her clothing also shifted, back to the armor padding she’d worn to bed before the nightmare began.

She looked around wildly. “What? Where—”

Lobo’s snarl hitched and the rider held out his hand. “Come here, Tora.” His voice was creaky and almost inhuman.

Slowly, Tora said, “Lord Kirri? But—” She looked over at the pile of sleeping champions, and then craned her head back to look at Ren. “You defeated them.”

“Exactly as I defeated you,” Ren agreed, because now was not the time to sweat the details. “Do you think I can defeat Kirri that way, too?”

Tora hesitated, chewing her lip and looking at the crouching Avenger. His imminent leap had definitely been checked, but a matching glow flared in the eyes of both wolf and rider that suggested rage would soon overwhelm the bloom of other feelings.

Nervously, Tora said, “I’m not worth this, sir. But I’d hoped you’d save my sister… eeek!” Her words ended in a squeak as the wolf bounded forward, snapping wildly.

Cú intercepted the beast smoothly, body-blocking it, digging his spear into the wolf’s shoulder and then shoving it to one side. As he did he growled, “Try again, Tora.” Meanwhile, Astolfo closed a hand around Hyde’s elbow.

Merlin added in a murmur, “And this time be honest.”

Tora took a deep breath. When she spoke again, her voice rang clearly. “They defeated me, my lord. They defeated your more capable lieutenants. And they’re giving you a chance to surrender. I think they have a chance of defeating the Sovereigns.”

The wolf, snapping at Gaé Bolg, gave her a baleful glare. The rider said in that inhuman voice, “More war, Tora?”

Tora’s spine stiffened further. “For my sister? Yes. With their help, I’ll fight the whole empire for her. I’ll fight you, too, if I have to. But I’d rather be on the same side. With you and Ren both on Ritsu’s side, I _know_ we can win.”

The wolf’s ears flattened. His fur rippled. Then all at once his form shivered and split, each half surging away and reforming into a smaller, different lupine creature: long-legged, horned, barely larger than normal wolves. The rider too changed as he came to earth in a crouch: his armor reflecting his lieutenants and his face shifting to something less inhumanly inscrutable.

Lord Kirri lifted his head as his familiars circled him. Although he seemed human now rather than part of a conglomerate Heroic Spirit, his eyes were so cold and hard they made Ren’s heart clench.

“You said I could save my friends. Make this happen and I will listen to what you want to say.”


	43. Anticipating Boredom

Ren nodded at Lord Kirri, refusing to quail before his cold gaze. “First of all, let’s get your friends to the fortress.”

“Absolutely not,” said Kirri calmly.

Confused, Ren frowned. “Don’t you want them safe and warm under a shelter?”

Kirri raised his eyebrows. “How much shelter does that ruined fortress really provide?”

“It has a roof,” Ren muttered, thinking of how otherwise empty it was. They still didn’t even have beds for everybody.

Kirri shook his head. “They had a campsite? I will move them there.”

Ren watched the lord as he moved to inspect his fallen comrades, her brow furrowed. “Why…?”

“Don’t worry about it, my lady,” advised Cú. “He probably doesn’t want to feel like you’ve taken him prisoner.”

“No.” Tora kept her eyes on her commander. “He doesn’t want to put himself in a position of being able to claim to have taken possession of the last unclaimed fortress by trickery.”

“Oh.” Ren digested this. “Tora, will you stay and help him? I need to get back to the fortress. I sent…” She thought of how to describe Flat. “I sent trouble there and I need to go manage it.”

“Mmm, I shall stay and supervise as well,” announced Merlin, watching Kirri. Then his gaze slid sideways to Ren and he brushed her cheek with one finger. “You can repay me later.”

Ren puffed her cheeks out, and then twisted her mouth as she felt rather than heard Hyde’s low growl behind her. Merlin’s gaze went from her face to over her head and he smiled pleasantly.

Abruptly she whirled away from Merlin and hooked her arm through Hyde’s, pulling him out of the sparking staredown he’d caught the other man in. “Come on. Jack, Cú, you too. Astolfo… give Kirri and Tora a hand moving them. Do whatever Tora asks, unless Merlin countermands it.”

Astolfo gave Ren a happy little salute and bounded over to join Kirri, already talking a mile a minute. Meanwhile, Jack attached herself to Ren’s free hand and Cú, rolling his eyes at his fellow Servants, fell in just behind her.

* * *

Back at the fortress, they encountered Ritsu at the gate and Ren gave her a brief, reassuring recap of the encounter, including Tora’s reappearance. The young girl brightened, and then her expression flickered as a deep weariness emerged now that her worry had been soothed.

Flat, standing just behind Ritsu, seemed to notice too, for he suddenly picked her up bodily. “Naptime—”

He stopped abruptly as Cú’s spear tip came perilously close to his throat, while Jack’s knives appeared in her hands.

Smiling awkwardly, still holding Ritsu half slung over his shoulder, Flat said, “She’s very tired. She barely made it here. I was just going to put her in the bed all her little siblings are in… should I not?”

Ritsu mumbled, “I’d like that, but I can walk, honest…”

“That’s fine,” said Ren with a sigh. Cú’s spear lowered, but Jack’s knives remained out. “Jack, you go with him and take a nap too. Keep protecting Ritsu. After, Flat, please come find me immediately. We need to talk about what you’re doing here.”

With a look rather like his hand had been caught in the cookie jar, Flat adjusted his grip on Ritsu, turned and trotted back into the fortress with her, Jack hot on his heels.

Ren glanced back at Cú and somewhat satirically offered him the hand Jack had freed.

Cú shook his head, making no effort to hide the narrow look he gave Hyde. “Later. I’ll need you later. Right now it’d hurt more than it helped.”

Hyde held her other hand very tightly, so tightly it ached. “Maybe so. Come on, Hyde. I want to get in front of a fire.”

“I can do that, at least,” Hyde rasped, and dragged Ren to the keep and down to the kitchen, where he spent a few moments playing with the embers in the fireplace. Ren watched him, shaking out her compressed hand, and then glanced over her shoulder at Cú, leaning against the doorframe.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he said quietly.

“Yeah,” said Hyde without looking up from the tiny flame he was coaxing to life. “Don’t.”

Ren seated herself against the wall beside the fireplace, where once she’d sat to rub Cú’s back. Now she looked at Hyde’s downturned face, lit by the flames below.

“I hate being out this long,” he muttered. “It’s been forever and I haven’t even really killed anything. I’m trying to focus on you instead, Master, but… but that’s not going to be any good either pretty soon. Not for you, and then not for me, either. I _need_ to get that floppy moron back.”

“He’s still stuck?” asked Ren gently.

Hyde cupped his hands around the growing blaze. “Yeah. He’s stuck more than any of the others, because he’s so damn good at lying to himself.”

Without warning, he scooped up the little fire, fuel and flame, and tossed it into the depths of the fireplace. It caught on apparently nothing at all, and spread across the inner hearth. Hyde flung three logs in as well, and then flopped over, his head just brushing against Ren’s curled leg. He held his hands up, watching dispassionately as the burns healed.

“I keep thinking about how much I want to show you what I can really do.” He lowered his hands and looked up at Ren. “But you wouldn’t like that at all, would you? The thick feel of blood dripping from your hands. The way so much of the human body is transparent if you stretch it…”

Ren twisted her fingers in his hair and he closed his eyes. She said, “That’s not all you can do. Or all you like.”

His crimson eyes flickered open again. “No. I like you. But you’re not going to spend all your time keeping me from getting bored, Master.” He laughed, short and hard. “I don’t think you _could_. It’d go bad in the end.”

Ren twisted his hair more, thinking, and then pushed at his shoulder with her free hand. “Sit up.”

Puzzled, Hyde did so, and Ren scooted closer to him, wrapping her arms around his chest from behind.

“Master—” Hyde began in a strangled voice.

“Shut up,” she told him, resting her chin on his shoulder and looking past him at Cú. The Lancer continued to lean calmly on the door, meeting her gaze without admonishment or judgement. Reassured, Ren closed her eyes and buried her face in Hyde’s shoulder, breathing in the scent that was uniquely his under the odors of fire and blood. Slowly, the Berserker’s warm arms pressed down over hers as he accepted her hug.

“You may be a killer, but you’re _my_ killer,” she whispered to him. “And because of that, I’ll help you get Jekyll back.”

His fingers interwove with hers and he tilted his head back until she could see his widened eyes. “That’s the problem, Master. I know how to do it, but I need Petals’ help for it and even knowing how much the process is going to piss him off, I _hate_ the thought of asking him right now.” His chest rumbled and his voice rasped as he said, “He keeps _looking_ at you. And _touching_ you.”

Ren felt as if treacherous ground she’d learned how to cross had suddenly sprouted unexpected crocodiles. “That’s just Merlin being Merlin.”

“He wants you,” said Hyde flatly. “The same as I do.”

Her hands suddenly felt cold even within Hyde’s warm ones. “I’m pretty sure that’s not true. You two are so different…”

Cú made a sound like he’d swallowed something he’d almost said. His eyes were slitted thoughtfully when Ren threw a worried glance toward him.

“Anyhow, Merlin’s just playing games. It’s just that he’s half-incubus so his games play out a certain way.” She tried to imbue her words with a confidence her churning stomach made into a lie.

Hyde did one of those impossible twisting moves all her Servants seemed capable of, pulling her around him in an instant such that their positions reversed, with her back pressed against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her possessively.

“Don’t care why. He’s doing it and it makes me want to kill him. And he’ll probably do it even more onceJekyll’s back and I’m not around. That’s the sort of shit that eventually breaks dams, Master.” He buried his face against her neck.Then she felt his lips brushing down her neck and moving across her collarbone. At the same time, his hands slid from her waist up to her breasts. Her breath caught in her throat as a fire sprang to life low in her belly.

His mouth moved to nibble on her ear. He nipped her earlobe and then flicked his tongue as he breathed, “I still want that bath, Master… and you, naked and wet, washing me all over. And then—”

Cú gave a little cough. “Flat should be here soon, my lady. I can hear him wandering about near the stairs.”

Hyde’s hands stopped and then moved back to safe areas. Wistfully, he mumbled, “Can’t I at least kill him?”

Doing her best to ignore the heat that Hyde’s hands and mouth had unlocked within her, Ren said frankly, “I don’t know if you’d win, so I’d rather you not try.”

Incredulously, Hyde said in a more normal voice, “Win? Against that twerp? He’s not a killer, Master. He’s not even a warrior.”

“He’s not an ordinary mage either.” Ren couldn’t have explained what an ordinary mage was, but she knew on a deep level that Flat didn’t fit the bill. At the very least, an ordinary mage wouldn’t have been dumb enough to come back with them. “I’m afraid he might find a way to unsummon you.”

“Be right back,” said Cú and stepped away from the door. Ren took advantage of the moment to shift herself out of Hyde’s arms. Hyde sighed and released her, but then arranged himself so he once again had his head propped on her crossed ankles when Cú reappeared, hauling Flat by his collar.

“Pull my hair,” Hyde told Ren. “It’s the only way I can put up with this guy.”

“He was climbing up the stairs instead of down,” reported Cú, releasing him with a little kitchenward shove.

“I was exploring,” protested Flat. “I would have come down here next. Honest.” His irrepressible grin spread across his face. “The magic here is so weird! I love it! There’s this fog all around the castle—”

“Flat!” said Ren, loud enough to cut him off. “ _Why are you here?_ ” _How_ was a question she wondered too, but it didn’t actually matter.

“I thought it’d be fun to see where you interesting people came from,” said Flat with a little shrug. “So I did.”

“And can you get back just as easily as you came along?” inquired Ren acidly, digging her fingers into Hyde’s hair.

Flat blinked and a distant look came into his eyes, as if he’d never considered the issue before. Then he laughed, putting his hand behind his head. “Nope! I guess not!”

Ren released Hyde’s hair to cover her face, until Hyde reached up with a pained expression and put her hands back on his head.

“Ouch!” said Flat, but he was still grinning as he looked back at Cú. “What was that for?”

Cú flicked Flat again with a finger, this time in the forehead. “Don’t you think we have enough problems on our hands without adding you to the mix? Idiot.”

Ren demanded, “Flat, were you paying attention at _all_ to our conversation around your luck lecture? You know what’s happening here. You must.”

“Oh, of course I do,” said Flat. “But it’s not that big a deal, is it? I mean, you’re going to fix it.” He beamed. “It’ll be great. I wanted to be on site to see it for myself.”

Hyde opened his eyes and gazed up at Ren. “Even if you think it’s dangerous to me, I’d be willing to try, Master. Not for me. For you. For you and everybody else.”

“Eh?” said Flat. “What’s he talking about?”

“Killing you,” Cú informed him, a malicious glint in his eyes.

If possible, Flat brightened. “Really?” He looked around happily. “This place is starting to feel just like home.”

Ren said hopelessly, “Flat…”

Flat’s smile flickered, fading a little, and he sat down at the table. “I’d much rather have death threats than assassination attempts, miss. Assassination attempts come from anyone, even family, but death threats only come from friends.”

Ren was pretty sure that was entirely wrong, but she paused at the image it gave her of Flat’s life.

“Don’t do it, Master,” warned Hyde, pulling her hands from her mouth, where she’d moved them without noticing, back to his hair again.

“What?” she said, blinking.

“Don’t start feeling sorry for him. I know he’s pathetic but—”

“Oh, no, please don’t, miss!” cut in Flat. “I’m fine! Ignore what I said before! I’m just so happy to be here.”

Deciding Hyde would have to be content with hair-tugging while she ignored his advice, Ren said, “Were you unhappy back at the Raven Tower?”

Flat shook his head. “No, no. I’m pretty happy most places, really. But this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and I had to jump on it.” His voice adopted a cajoling tone. “Won’t you please let me stay with you? I promise I’ll try to be helpful. I can do some pretty tricky things sometimes!”

“He still doesn’t get it,” said Hyde in disgust. “I get it and I’m _me_.”

“I don’t think he _can_ get it,” said Cú. “We could lock him up.”

“Hush, both of you,” Ren said, staring at Flat’s earnest face and thinking. They couldn’t get rid of Flat easily—he’d come along on his own, he could probably get out of a cell trivially, andif they kicked him out of the Summoner’s Castle, he’d end up causing trouble or worse, being recruited by their enemies.

But… _Flat_ didn’t seem to realize any of that. The trick, Ren decided, was to keep him earnest like this. Earnest and eager to help. She suspected that, like Hyde, he’d be most dangerous when bored. All she had to do was keep him busy.

She took a deep breath and let it out. “All right. If you’ll promise to do what I say, no matter what, you can stay and help us.”

Flat looked thoughtful. “I just have to obey you, huh? LIke these Servants do?” He grinned. “That sounds like fun. I’m in!”


	44. Refreshing Cú

“And now…” Ren’s gaze drifted to Cú. “Hyde, go get me a deer. Stay away from people. Flat… go explore the castle. Don’t leave it and _don’t change anythin_ g unless you talk to me first.”

“Ooh,” said Flat. “Is this a test? I’ll pass, I promise.”

Meanwhile, Hyde gazed up at her, his crimson eyes narrow. “What are you going to do, Master?”

“I’m going to take care of Cú,” Ren said briskly, although once again nervousness roiled her stomach. “He used up the most energy of all of you, and I need him at his best.”

Hyde’s gaze drifted over to where the blue-haired Lancer leaned on the doorframe. Then he snickered. “I guess I did fuck him up some.” He sat up. “I’ll get that deer.”

“Properly cleaned and gutted,” Ren added.

Hyde gave her an unusually wry smile. “It’s not really the same, Master.”

“All the same, we need meat and it needs to be cleaned,” she said stubbornly. “You know what to do. So go do it.”

Flat inquired, “What’s not the same?”

Hyde gave him a sour look. “And she thinks you’re bright. Get out of my way before I show you.”

Flat meekly moved to one side, watching Hyde curiously as the other blonde man strode past him. Then he said, “So should I go explore now?”

“Yes,” said Ren patiently, and then repeated, “Stay in the castle, and don’t change anything.”

Once Flat had saluted her and vanished into the hall beyond, she met Cú’s eyes. He still had that air of raggedness, with a weariness in his eyes that had been belied by his speed with his spear earlier. He was somebody who would give everything he had, right up until he had nothing left—and then he’d find a little bit more.

Her stomach tightened as he said, very casually, “So what do you want to do?” All she could think of was her body stretched out on top of his, their senses mingling as he said, _This would work even better if we were both naked. Skin to skin, ah yeah…_

She’d said _Not a good idea right now,_ without self-consciousness or thought for the future. She’d been so concerned for him, so desperate to bring him back to her. And now here he was, still in need of what only she could give. She couldn’t help flushing and looking away nervously, even as she knew it was irrational. She already knew what he _really_ thought of any intimacy deeper than hair-brushing; what he said in his post-berserker haze didn’t count.

She would brush his hair again. The bracelet Merlin had made would make it more efficient. She could rub his back, too, but only if he wanted that. The memory of his hot skin and smooth muscle under her fingers and nails resurfaced, and she blushed even brighter.

He was looking at her neutrally, waiting for her answer.

“Um,” she said cleverly, and looked around, mostly to break eye contact.

He sighed, plucked a brush from the box near the door, and crossed to crouch down in front of her. Reaching out, he closed her fingers around the brush, and then, instead of turning around to let her get to his hair, sat on his heels, looking at her with the same thoughtful expression he had so often when he watched her. She worried suddenly that he was going to lecture her about Hyde or Flat or even Merlin.

Ren moved the brush abortively, but Cú didn’t notice. Finally, he blew out his breath, said, “Aw, fuck it,” leaned in, and kissed her.

It wasn’t the gentle peck he’d given her in this room before, when he’d told her he didn’t like being seduced, although it started the same way: his warm lips soft against hers. But he very quickly deepened it, his mouth opening and his tongue pushing past her lips. One of his hands curved around he back of her head while his other hand slid around her waist, gathering her up until she was kneeling, too, her body pressed against his. His faintly bestial scent infused her nose, and she realized she’d been smelling it in her dreams.

Ren’s heart beat a rapid staccato; the only part of her moving when even her thoughts had stilled. Then wet warmth flowered in the pit of her stomach. She made a sound deep in the back of her throat and slid her hands up his clothed chest to his shoulders as she returned the kiss feverishly. For a moment her teeth clacked against his, but he adjusted her head and pulled her even closer, settling her so she straddled his thighs as he knelt. Then his chest armor once again evaporated, allowing her unfiltered access to the smooth curve of his muscle and the heat of his skin.

When Hyde kissed her, it was always the first step on a journey with a very clear destination. It made his kisses exciting in both good and bad ways. And Merlin’s kiss… Merlin’s kiss had been a form of goodbye, that was all. But Cú kissed her like that was all he wanted right at that moment, and like the moment could last forever.

He held her as the fire in her blood grew until it was roaring in her ears. She instinctively ground against him, rock hard and just as trustworthy. His hands roamed, but they stayed light and encouraging rather than demanding, _progressing_. When a delicate, trembling sweetness suffused her, stilling her movements, his arms tightened around her, assuring her that she wouldn’t fall away. After, his explorations became slower, although his hardness remained pressing between her thighs. But he didn’t stop kissing her. He was a man determined to get as much of her mouth and neck as he could while letting her decide the next step.

She was just feeling the urge to move again, to draw her nails across his skin and push herself against him, when somebody cleared their throat. Cú seemed inclined to ignore it, his mouth moving from her neck back to her lips, but something about the sound made Ren look for the source immediately.

Merlin stood in the doorway, watching with a fixed smile and a faraway gaze.

“Oh!” said Ren, a storm of emotions sweeping away her ability to say anything else. Was she embarrassed? _Should_ she be embarrassed? She didn’t know. Was she annoyed at the interruption? Kind of. Was she nervous? A little scared? More than a little angry at his smile? All of that. Cú keeping his hands locked around her waist somehow made it even more complicated.

“So sorry to interrupt,” said Merlin cheerfully, as if meant it, and then added with unusual solicitude, “I hope you’re feeling better, Child of Light?”

Cú gave Merlin a cool, sidelong look, and then dropped his mouth to nibble the sensitive skin he’d found where Ren’s neck joined her shoulder. A shiver ran down Ren’s spine and all the way to the tips of her breasts, a feeling made stronger somehow by Merlin’s presence. Although his smile lingered, suddenly he held his staff in one hand.

Ren put one hand on the back of Cú’s neck, scratching reassuringly as she shifted away from his mouth. “Is something wrong, Merlin?”

“No, no. Not wrong, exactly…” he said distantly.

“How is Lord Kirri doing?”

Merlin startled, as if from a daze. “Lord Kirri? Oh, he’s woken his fellows and taken them off back where they came from.”

Cú finally looked directly at Merlin, and when he spoke, Ren felt the rumble of his growl under her hand. “ _You let them go?”_ It occurred to her belatedly that the berserker side of Cú could reactivate if he was pushed hard enough.

Merlin looked shocked. “What else should I have done?” Then he looked like a sudden happy thought had occurred and gave a big smile. “You could go after them. They’ve only got the smallest head start.” He held his fingers up close together as a visual aid.

Cú shifted under Ren, and then stood up fluidly, lifting her to her feet at the same time before releasing her.

Hurriedly, Ren said, “No, don’t. I didn’t want prisoners, I wanted allies. If Merlin thought it was okay to let them go back to their town, I trust him.”

“…Yeah,” said Cú after a moment. “I’m going to go keep an eye on them anyhow, if you don’t mind, my lady.”

Ren, now too thoroughly flustered to make good decisions and knowing it, gave a helpless shrug. The warmth of the Lancer’s body against her own was a rapidly fading memory, while the heat between her legs had turned into a hopeless ache.

With a wry, sardonic nod, he added, “Thanks for the recharge, _Master_. It worked a lot better this time.”

After he’d dematerialized, Ren slowly hoisted herself onto the table and drew her knees up to her chest, hugging them as she tried to regain her shattered equilibrium. Merlin, hovering nearby, didn’t help one bit.

“Young lady,” he said. “I’d meant to talk to you about Hyde, and now I wonder if I should also speak with you about the Child of Light.” Softly he added, as if to himself, “But no. He’s a good man, if lacking in imagination.”

“If you’re here to warn me Hyde is dangerous, believe me, I know,” said Ren wearily. She wanted to sleep. She’d had a long, exhausting day since she last slept. If Merlin would stop talking, she’d curl up right on the table and pass out.

“Mmm,” said Merlin. “He won’t be content with kisses to replenish what he spent to aid you, young lady.”

Ren sighed. “He wants a bath with me. And, yes, other things. What business is it of yours, though, Merlin?” It was a hard question to ask, but she did it anyhow.

“Oh, well,” he said brightly. “I have some experience in being seduced by the murderously psychotic, so I thought I might be able to give you some advice.”

“Run away?” said Ren, nastier than she intended to be because of a flicker of disappointment in his answer.

Merlin shook his head solemnly. “Not really feasible here, alas. But if we can return Hyde to his usual place… it might be better for everyone. I do miss my good friend Dr. Jekyll.”

Ren opened eyes that had drifted shut. “You know, he’d like to do that exact thing himself. But he says that even though you’ll _hate_ his plan, he’s having trouble asking you for the help he needs.”

An improbably happy smile stretched across Merlin’s face. “Ah! Well! I’m sure whatever the annoyance of Hyde’s plan is, the benefits of recovering Jekyll will far outweigh it.” Then he peered more closely at her. “You look exhausted, young lady. Why don’t you sleep a while? I believe Ritsu’s nest in the portal room is unoccupied.”

“Yeah,” she muttered. “I’ll go there in a minute.” She flopped over on the table, nestling her head on her arm.

“No, no,” chided Merlin. “Hyde will be back from his hunting expedition eventually. Finding you asleep where he wants to put his prey will confuse him and disrupt everything.”

But Ren, half asleep, didn’t really hear him. Nor did she really notice when he muttered something under his breath, rolled up his sleeves, and picked her up to bear her off to safer bedding. But she did notice, if through a dreamlike haze, when he brushed his fingers over her mouth and whispered, “Wretched, delightful girl.”

It was a nice dream, and she wanted it to go on. But instead, a deeper sleep overtook her, and she knew nothing more.


	45. Close Your Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you have commented on our dear Mage of Flowers’ utter stupidity in certain ways. Uh, well, hold onto your hats… and sorry in advance. It’s getting worse before it gets better.

Ren once again woke up to Hyde staring at her expectantly. He crouched at the edge of the blanket nest, arms resting on his knees, his crimson eyes a little too wide and his mouth twisted wryly. His hands were clenched into fists. As she met his gaze, a tendon in his neck relaxed and his hands unfolded.

“Finally! I thought you’d never wake up.” He scooted closer and sat properly on the blankets, pulling her into his arms. “Really wanted to start poking you.”

“Did you get that deer?” asked Ren, still trying to bring herself abreast of events. She’d fallen asleep in the kitchen… Had Merlin moved her here? She’d had a dream, yet she could no longer remember it, and she wondered distractedly if Merlin had stolen it from her.

Then she brushed her fingers over Hyde’s reddened lips and he caught her hand, holding it there. “Of course. Some other stuff too. The rabbits’ll taste good and I bet somebody can do something with the bear’s skin.” He began to nibble on her fingers as his hand slipped under her top.

From the portal room door, Astolfo said, “Not yet, Eddie!” The Rider was sitting down, leaning against the door frame, legs stretched out and hands behind his head.

Hyde released Ren’s fingers from his mouth to say, “Shut it, Moonshine.” But Astolfo’s interruption was enough to break the spell Hyde’s intensity wove over Ren in unexpected moments. She pushed against his face and sat up.

“What’s going on? What time is it? How long was I asleep?”

“Middle of the afternoon,” said Hyde. “You were asleep _forever_.”

Ren absorbed this. “Has Cú come back?” She could reach out to him herself, but she felt… shy of that right now.

“Nope,” said Hyde, regarding her with the gaze of a calm wild animal. “You really juiced him up properly, didn’t you? I can still smell him on you.”

Ren’s eyes narrowed and she wondered how Hyde could be so jealous of Merlin but not of Cú. Now was probably not the time to ask, though.

“Did Merlin speak with you? He… he told me he would help you get Jekyll back. He said he wanted that too.”

Hyde’s laugh was unpleasant. “Of course he does. And yeah. Just waiting for you to wake up.”

Ren finally realized she didn’t actually know what Hyde’s plan was, or why he needed Merlin’s help. She’d vaguely assumed it was like what he’d done for Ritsu. Now she furrowed her brow. “So what’s your plan?”

Hyde bared his teeth in a fierce grin and moved his hand under her top, curving around her hip. “Remember the first time I kissed you?”

_She’d been talking to Jekyll, who wanted to avoid her. She’d gotten_ too close _in his opinion. Hyde had surfaced, lunged for her, kissed her hard, started touching her as he did now. And then a single-use Mystic Code Merlin had made for Jekyll had invoked, bringing Jekyll back to the surface._

“Oh.” Ren put her hand over Hyde’s fingers. “How… how does that work, exactly?”

“I gotta do something Jekyll would _really hate_ , while wearing the thing. And ‘cause he’s really deep in his stupid dream, it may take a _while_.”

The malicious delight in Hyde’s grin now made sense. “Oh,” Ren repeated, and then pushed at Hyde again. “Let me stand up.”

He obediently opened his arms and she pushed herself to her feet and stretched. He remained seated, looking up at her with those calm wild-animal eyes.

She’d said she’d help him. When she thought about it, she didn’t hate the idea of letting Hyde’s wandering hands wander a little farther, especially in a situation like this. And yet she knew that Hyde’s self-control was precarious. Trusting that this would work as planned required trusting _Jekyll_ , not Hyde, and… she didn’t. She didn’t know him well enough. He refused to let her get to know him. She couldn’t be sure he didn’t despise her for the situation he’d ended up in. Why would he wake up from a dream just to stop Hyde from having his way with her?

And yet Hyde thought he would, and Hyde knew him best.

Astolfo bounced to his feet. “Merlin says there’s gotta be rules. You two won’t be alone, so if you want to stop, we can make sure that happens.”

Feeling a little reassured, Ren glanced down at Hyde again. “That’s okay with you?”

Suddenly he was the one looking down at her, his fingers curling against her cheek as he stood up. “Master, if it wouldn’t bother you, I’d do you in the middle of Kensington Gardens on the Queen’s birthday.”

Astolfo laughed loudly. “That’s our Eddie!”

Ren flushed, simply because it seemed like somebody present ought to at that image. “I _meant_ would it still work to bring Jekyll out?”

“Won’t matter.” He brought his mouth to her ear and whispered, “I’m really looking forward to Merlin’s _supervision_.”

Ren felt the curl of arousal in her stomach already and took a deep breath, once again pushing him away like he was an insistently affectionate cat. “All right. Where’s Merlin? Do we do this here?”

“He’s outside playing tag with Flat and Tora and the kids,” said Astolfo. “I think we can do it wherever.” He grinned. “How comfy do you want to be?”

Ren weighed this, looking around. The kitchen presumably had a bunch of carcasses in it. The portal room… probably didn’t need the energy contamination. She ran through the other rooms she’d explored in the fortress and at last said, “The great hall, I guess.”

“The bed,” said Astolfo with a knowing grin that Ren was starting to find irritating.

“No, actually. Where we did this before. We might as well try to recreate the situation as much as possible.”

“Ohhhh,” said Astolfo. He gave her a thumbs up. “Right! I’ll go get Merlin and meet you there!”

Hyde rolled his eyes as Astolfo’s pink braid vanished through the door. “That guy is weird, Master.”

“Come on,” said Ren, taking Hyde’s hand and pulling him after her. “I don’t need Merlin lecturing me more for dawdling down here.”

The afternoon hall had slanting blocks of sunlight catching motes of dust. Ren had arranged herself and Hyde near one of the blocks where she remembered moonlight being before when Merlin and Astolfo came in. Merlin had changed from his suit to his traditional clothes, but removed his mantle for the training session. A sparkle of sweat Ren wasn’t sure she believed gleamed on his brow and bare arms.

“Well then!” he said, clapping his hands. “Astolfo says you’re ready to do this?” He pulled his hands apart and cupped something tiny in one of them. “I’ve got your Mystic Code right here, Hyde. Astolfo, why don’t you go play with the kids? If they stumbled in, it would… ruin the mood, I’m sure.”

Astolfo’s lips pushed out in a little pout and then he shrugged and grinned. “True. Sure thing. Shout if you need help!” He vanished back out into the sunlit courtyard.

Merlin continued to stand near the door, holding out the tiny Mystic Code to Hyde. The Berserker prowled over to him and picked up the little loop of hair, slipping it over his ring finger. The two men stood nearly the same height, but something about the ancient look in Merlin’s eyes and the set of Hyde’s chin made Merlin appear to be looking down on Hyde. But he had his usual friendly smile as he gave up the Mystic Code.

“I’ll just hang around to make sure nothing unexpected happens. Is that all right, Serendipity?” He looked over Hyde’s shoulder with the same bright, careless gaze.

“Yeah, that would probably be good. Jekyll’s pretty much a closed book to me. He might come back mad.” She rubbed her arms at the unexpected onset of goosebumps. Then Hyde was at her side again, sliding his arm around her waist.

His mouth went to her ear again. “You still owe me that bath, you know. I’ll be back for that.”

Ren turned herself so she could rest her fingertips lightly on Hyde’s chest, her heartbeat accelerating. “Yes. You’ll get it.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, running his lips around the curve of her ear. The delicate sensation made her close her eyes to concentrate on it. “I will. Meanwhile, Master, I want you to miss me.”

The softness of his lips on her ear became the sharpness of his teeth and she inhaled sharply. Like a flash, his mouth was on hers, his tongue licking at her like she was honey.

Cú’s attentions had been patient and highly engaged, without ever giving her even a hint of losing control. He’d taken exactly what Ren had wanted to give him, and given her exactly what she asked for.

Hyde, on the other hand, was practically loss of control incarnate. As his tongue danced with hers, his hands moved under her top, and then they were past the point whre Jekyll had seized control before and on Ren’s breasts. When she broke the kiss to gasp for breath, his tongue burned across her throat even as his fondling fanned Ren’s arousal into a wildfire.

Her arms moved from his chest to encircle his neck, one of her hands twisting through his silky hair while the other rested against his neck. She whimpered at his teeth and the movement of his hands, tilting her head back.

Hyde whispered against her throat, “Touch me too, Master.”

She gasped again as his rough thumbs rubbed the aching peaks of her breasts, and then slid her hands under his vest and shirt. The coarser hair on his chest tickled her palms. When she found his own erect nipples and pinched them, his groan enticed her to rake her nails lightly down his chest.

He captured her mouth again savagely in response, his hands flattening against her breasts. Then he moved his hands to her hips, pulling her tight against him so he could deepen the kiss. His erection pressed into her stomach, which seemed like entirely the wrong place for it to be to Ren’s desire-fuddled brain.

She put her arms around his neck again, instinctively pushing herself up on her tiptoes, trying to get the hardness against her flesh to the place where it felt nicest. Hyde, still kissing her urgently, obligingly lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around him. It still wasn’t right but it was better.

He took a few steps until her back pressed against a stone wall, and lowered her a few inches and _oh yes_. Her fingers clenched in his hair and he growled against her mouth. One of his hands braced her while the other moved between them, fumbling at his trousers in a way that felt like a live wire against her core, even through her leggings.

Then he was tugging on her waistband, his mouth hot and wet against her shoulder. Her own breath came raggedly as she realized she hoped Jekyll wouldn’t take control. She _wanted_ this, wanted that hot hardness inside her and the sense of completion that her earlier encounter with Cú had foreshadowed but not quite delivered. Everything that had frightened her before had washed away on a flood of naked need.

Then she heard a hiss and smelled the acrid scent of burning hair, right before Jekyll ripped himself away from her. She landed hard on the floor and stared numbly up at him. He stared back with wide, horrified blue eyes, his hands adjusting his trousers.

“Oh my god,” he muttered. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry.” He took two steps backward, and then turned and fled out of the main entrance to the Great Hall.

Ren stared blankly after him, the fire raging through her body unabated. She moved her hands restlessly along her legs, trying to figure out what to do next.

Merlin’s black-clad form suddenly interposed itself into her line of sight, crouching down a few feet from her. His head tilted, his hair spilling onto the ground. He wore a look of friendly interest.

“How are you doing, young lady?”

Ren’s shoulders hunched as memories engulfed her: Merlin’s arms around her as he held her on his lap, his head on her shoulder. Merlin crushing her against him in the courtyard.

Merlin’s mouth against hers as he kissed her goodbye, in a dream that wasn’t.

She stared at him helplessly, as a yearning beyond words unfolded within her. _Him_. She wanted _him._ Cú was a crush and Hyde was a fling, but Merlin’s very presence could make her furious and lonely and _aching_ for his arms around her.

His voice deeper, Merlin said, “Ren?” Something tightened around his eyes and she watched hungrily, stretching out one hand as if she could trace the curve of his face.

“Merlin,” she whispered, and it hurt somehow just to say his name. She started to pull back her hand but he caught it, his brow furrowing. Then he glanced down at their joined hands as if surprised by his own action.

From the door, Astolfo called, “Hey, I saw Jekyll, how’s it going—”

In a voice devoid of emotion, still looking at their hands, Merlin said, “ _Get out,”_ and Ren could feel the power under the words thrumming against her skin.

“Whoops!” said Astolfo and the door slammed closed.

Then Merlin’s bare arms were around her as he gathered her to him. He was so close _so close_ and she _owed him_ for that kiss in the dream. So as he stood up, holding her like he had when he’d put her to bed, _she remembered that now_ , she put a hand around his neck and pulled herself up to kiss him.

She only hit the corner of his mouth the first time, but he turned his head to correct her aim so that his mouth met hers fully. His lips were soft and still at first. But as he lowered her onto the bed next to the fireplace, the intensity of his response pushed her back against the mattress.

Ren felt as if something twisted hard in a forgotten place inside of her mind, and a strange sort of pressure prickled against her skin. Everything acquired the consistency and texture of a dream. Merlin’s mouth against hers felt both unreal and too real, like with merely his mouth he could reach down through her spine into her soul. And then his hands moved up her torso and all her clothes _right he’d made them for her_ were gone. She felt like his fingers could sink into her skin and all she’d feel was bliss.

When he lifted his head away from hers, the look in his lilac eyes was fey and alien. She didn’t care. She clenched her fists in his shirt, but he caught them in one hand, pushed them over her head and held them there.

“Hey!” she said, struggling. She wanted to touch him! Then he lowered his mouth to her breast and she stopped breathing at the touch of his tongue to her sensitized flesh. The lightest tug of her nipple between his teeth made her inhale sharply before her breathing shortened.

His tongue flicked around the soft flesh around her nipple and she twisted her hands convulsively as her back arched. His grip loosened for a moment and she laced the fingers of one hand through his, while wrapping her other around his wrist. His arm tendons tightened against her palm as he once again pulled her taut bud into his mouth.

Meanwhile his other hand slipped down her ribcage, traced the sensitive flesh between her ribcage and her abdomen, and encircled her navel delicately. As his fingers crept lower and he gave her nipple a final lick before leaning over her to the capture the other, Ren felt all the blood rush to her head. Merlin’s iridescent hair across her breast glowed like a rainbow to her unexpectedly blurry vision, so she squeezed her eyes shut to concentrate on everything else.

When his first two fingers crept into the curls between her legs, her hips jerked. He took her breast more deeply into his mouth and used her hips’ movement to slide his fingers into the cleft there. The combined sensations, exquisite and overpowering, made Ren bite her lip so hard she tasted blood.

Merlin rubbed very lightly between her legs as he disentangled his other hand from hers and slid it down her cheek to brush a finger across her upper lip. The nearly ticklish touch made her instinctively release her swollen lower lip and capture his finger in her mouth. Greedily, she sucked, and Merlin released her breast to raise his head, his hair slipping across her stomach.

For a heartbeat, maybe two, the dreamlike feeling enfolding Ren _shuddered_ , as if cold reality was about to knock down the walls. But then the idea vanished, itself a dream, and Merlin stayed almost entirely still for a long moment as she licked and laved and sucked his index finger. Only between her legs was there motion and his hand twisted in a lazy, absent-minded way.

Then he exhaled in a long, controlled way, shifted his weight and brought his mouth to the corner of hers. “Kiss me instead,” he said in a low smooth voice that sounded both like and unlike the ordinary everyday Merlin. She was so intrigued by this that she let him replace his hand with his mouth.

At that point, she realized her hands were free. Feeling smug at her victory, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and discovered to her delight he’d also lost his top. She drew her fingertips hopefully down his spine as she captured his tongue. But he promptly took control of the kiss, teasing her a moment before whispering, “Wretched girl.” He still wore his trousers, too, which made her pout against his mouth.

As a reply, he pressed down firmly between her legs, sending a bolt of pleasurable lightning right through her. She hissed and dragged her fingernails across his shoulderblades. His chest moved against hers, and her back arched.

He said again, “Wretched girl…” as his hand began to move in complicated ways that pressed into her core and sent more lightning sizzling through her at the same time.

Between his hand and his mouth she felt like she was dissolving and coming together again in tiny lapping waves. Each breath sketched in a moan, and each moan was a vessel for the sensations overwhelming her. In and out his slick fingers moved, while his thumb moved in an irregular little circle. She moved her hips, rising up to meet the pressure of his hand, and turned her mouth away from his so she could gasp.

His lips moved under her eye, trailed across her cheekbone, paused at her temple and then settled at her ear. With his tongue he traced the curl of her ear and delicately touched the the inner shell.

From the liquid fire surging through her every nerve emerged the single thought: _Am I going mad?_ Her memories only went back so far, but it was hard to believe that her body was capable of _this,_ of fusing into a single circuit activated by a mouth against her ear and a hand between her legs.

Then Merlin sucked on the lobe of her ear and a final bolt of lightning welded her last bit of self-awareness to her body. After that, she drifted on a perfect cloud of perfection, beyond vision or sound or big vocabularies, and her whole body tingled.

Eventually, the tingle ebbed. She thought she might have even slept, but only for a moment. When she opened her eyes, she stared at the stone ceiling above her. Something about her body felt strange. Unexpected. She shifted her weight, realized she was alone on the bed, and fully clothed.

A pleasant lassitude suffused her limbs. She forced herself to sit up anyhow, still feeling a warm, relaxing glow lingering at her core. Frowning, brushing her fingers over a mouth that should have been bruised and swollen but wasn’t, she looked around.

Merlin crouched about ten feet away, in black shirt and trousers with his staff across his knees and his hands clasped between them. He watched her with an unusually somber expression that made her think of the blankness he’d had when he’d been low on emotional energy. She narrowed her eyes, leaning forward, and his distant gaze focused on her.

“I wanted to help you,” he said quietly. “I wanted to help you but I didn’t—” He stopped and his gaze went distant again.

Then, as he flipped a switch, ordinary everyday Merlin returned. He smiled and said, “And I hope you feel a little better now!”

Something hot and bitter chased the lassitude out her fingers and toes. She pulled her legs close but straightened her spine. “You gave me a dream.”

He gave a little one-sided shrug, his smile becoming absent. “I’m an incubus. You were… in need.”

“So you gave me _a dream_?” When Merlin’s expression shifted to wary, Ren demanded, “How much of this _dream_ did you see?”

His smile vanished entirely. “All of it.”

She couldn’t ask her next burning question. _Who decided I’d dream of you?_ She couldn’t ask it because any answer she could imagine made her want to scream.

With a flicker of a smile, he said, “I guess I ended up doing something perverted to you after all.”

A new answer occurred to her and instantly froze the flame of her hurt into icy wrath. She spoke the implication of the answer instead of the question itself. “You are a _coward_ , Merlin.”

Almostly flatly he said, “You know, women have told me that before.” And then with another burst of emotion, he added laughingly, “Scary women!”

Biting out each word, Ren quoted him mockingly, “Murderously psychotic women?”

His eyes widened and then widened more, like a man realizing he’s left a whole trail of fatal missteps. He didn’t say anything.

Ren added bitterly, “Are you going to run away again now?”

Merlin stared at her for a long, long moment and then slowly said, “I promised I wouldn’t do that.”

“Like you’d let that stop you?” she said and scrubbed at burning eyes.

“No,” he said softly, and his voice was the low voice from her dream. “I wouldn’t.”

She shook her head as her eyes kept burning. She didn’t understand, and knew that he didn’t _want_ her to understand, which almost hurt more than everything else. “Just… go away. Leave me alone.” Then she put her head against her arms to hide her eyes.

A moment later, she heard Merlin quietly leave the room.


	46. Sunshine and Roses

After Merlin left, Ren pulled herself into a tighter ball, trying not to think or feel. Surely if she held on to that long enough, it’d become real? And if she painted her mental walls the color of pain, nobody would ever be able to hurt her.

A few minutes later, the great hall door opened again and Astolfo walked quietly in, not quite closing the door behind him.

“Master?” he called softly. “Renridi?”

His footsteps stopped some distance away. Ren didn’t look up. If she pretended he wasn’t there long enough, that would become real too.

Astolfo clicked his tongue, the occasional footfall suggesting he was moving around more quietly. Then a weight pressed into the bed behind Ren and Astolfo said, “Oh, Renridi. You’ve been so busy brushing everybody else’s hair, you haven’t had time to brush your own. Bedhead looks pretty cute, but it bugs me when I have it!”

Ren couldn’t help envisioning Astolfo’s thick pink braid and realized she hadn’t brushed his hair at all, not since he’d arrived, and Hippogriff definitely wasn’t cheap. Her shoulders hunched and she worked harder on pretending she was a rock.

Astolfo seemed oblivious as he began to brush the bottom of her hair lightly. “Oh, and your hair is so fine! I thought it was. I’ve kind of wanted to play with it since we first met.” He fell silent for a moment and then began talking again, this time telling her an extremely improbable story about an adventure involving his hair, a unicorn, a cyborg and a bet, in which he won a golden comb useless as anything other than a quest reward.

“So I gave it to the next kitchen maid I met, because they’re the hardest workers I know! A nice little girl working in the Duke’s manor. That actually caused a bit of trouble, though!” Astolfo laughed. “I had to fight so many duels so she could keep it, and then it turned out a fairy lived inside who helped her become a princess. They laughed at me for days! But in a nice way, of course.” He’d slowly worked his way up her hair as he spoke and it wasn’t until he made several long strokes from scalp to ends that she realized she’d slowly uncurled from her rock formation.

She tilted her head back, her eyes still closed. He adjusted her hair under her neck and kept brushing.

“I should do this for you,” she said. Guilt hurt despite her mental paint job.

Astolfo leaned to one side to look at her, smiling. “If you want to, I won’t mind!”

Uncertainly, Ren said, “Aren’t you low on magical energy like everybody else?”

His eyes widened. “You know, I’m not! I wonder why?”

Ren frowned and reached out to him along the same connection she shared to her other Servants. Almost immediately she felt surrounded by… a quilt smelling of roses, portraying sunshine streaming past silver clouds that glittered with threads of madness. As with touching the mind shared by Jekyll and Hyde, it seemed separated from Astolfo’s body awareness, but it was definitely him.

She withdrew without prying deeper, blinking and meeting Astolfo’s curious gaze. “Well, you’re definitely my Servant. I can feel the connection.”

“I could have told you that, Master,” teased Astolfo and returned to brushing her hair. “I’m not lying, though. I feel just fine. I could ride Hippogriff all day right now!”

Merlin would probably know why. But Ren’s shoulders tightened as she thought of him. It was an answer she could skip having right now. She didn’t want to ever talk to him again outside of what was required to strategize.

How could he have thought she would simply accept what he’d done? The choice he’d made? He was ancient, supposedly wise, andhe’d been feeding on her emotions. Surely he must have known how she felt before she did herself. Did he think a dream would make it mean less? Keep her longing from becoming even more inconvenient to him while still giving him a hot meal?

Well, he was right. It had. She hated him now—

Astolfo’s head pressed against her back, like he’d gently headbutted her tense shoulders. “I asked him once if it was a curse. The way he took the light of everybody he loved, I mean.”

Ren clenched her fists tighter in her lap, listening.

“He said that was the problem. He hadn’t loved any of them. He didn’t even wish he could. And that’s why he had to run.”

“Because women would be angry he used them?” she asked bitterly.

Astolfo’s head twisted against her back. “No. Because they thought he was worth it. Worth losing their light for. Don’t let him take _your_ light, Renridi, okay? We’d all be blind without you.”

Ren flinched away, and then settled back again. “He can’t take what isn’t there. I’ve never been a sunshiney person, Astolfo.”

“I’ve noticed you don’t smile and I’m going to fix that!” said Astolfo, scooting up to sit beside her. “It’s not what I mean, though. It’s like…” He paused for a moment and then shook his head. “Oh, I can’t explain it any better. Just remember that moonlight is sunlight, reflected. Okay?”

She stared at her incomprehensible, sunshine-through-the-rain companion. “All right. Um, you _really_ don’t need any magical energy?”

“Nope! I’ve been getting some steadily.” He grinned. “Maybe it’s just being in your presence, Master.” He scratched his cheek. “I do think maybe you should spend some time with little Jackie though. She’s flagging even after her nap and some food.”

Her shoulders hunching again, Ren said, “You’re right. I let myself get distracted.”

Astolfo gave her another one of those beaming smiles. “You’re really doing great, you know! None of us would ever complain! Well, except Eddie but you know him.”

Ren couldn’t help herself. “Merlin complains all the time. Not about magical energy but about everything else.”

His brow furrowing, Astolfo said, “Reeeallly? Huh. Maybe that’s why he hasn’t run away.” He patted her foot. “Anyhow, if you want to have some more time to yourself, I’ll go feed Jack that bear Eddie brought back.”

At least Jack would be emotionally straightforward to deal with. And she wouldn’t bring up Merlin. Ren didn’t blame Astolfo for doing so. She was even a little grateful he’d inflicted his presence on her. Her hair certainly felt better, and although she hadn’t understood the specific intent of his advice, he’d successfully reminded her not to get lost in her negative emotions. She still didn’t want to have a personal conversation with Merlin ever again, but she wouldn’t throw away her goals for Ritsu and her world because of his poor choices.

“No, I’d like to see her. If you wouldn’t mind telling her that?”

Astolfo hopped off the bed and saluted. “I’ll do it!” He darted out of the room, leaving Ren briefly alone with her thoughts.


	47. Moving Forward

The door opened and closed again. Ren opened her eyes, but she seemed to be alone in the darkening room. Something moved at the corner of her vision and the back of her neck prickled. Jack appeared to be a cute little girl, but Ren could never entirely set aside the fact that the child Servant was also a dangerous and inhuman killer.

On the other hand, that wasn’t a truth to be changed by setting her at a distance, so she softly said, “Hi, Jack.”

“Hi, Mommy,” said Jack from right beside her, as her Presence Concealment faded. “Rider said you wanted to see us?” Her green eyes shone unnaturally bright in the chamber’s gloom, and the points of her face seemed accentuated to knife-like sharpness.

Ren held up the brush. “Time to untangle that mop of hair, kiddo.”

Jack reached up and pulled on a strand of her own hair, crossing her eyes to focus on it. Then she looked at Ren again. “But why?”

Exhaling softly, Ren took the strand of hair from Jack’s fingers and ran the brush lightly over it. This was what she’d expected in the Raven Tower: questioning, doubt, even anger. Jack had only clung to her then, too rattled by the strange situation to question. But now that they had time, now that she’d managed to tend to everybody else before Jack, Ren had to pay the piper.

“Because I want to keep you with me,” Ren said.

Jack leaned back, pulling her hair away from Ren and tilting her head. “We don’t understand. Is it because we kill and dismember? Is that why you want to keep us?”

Ren’s mouth tightened and she tilted her own head to match Jack’s. “No. I want to keep you because you deserve better than being thrown away.”

The testing expression on Jack’s face became genuine confusion. “Huh? We _are_ thrown away. We don’t deserve anything. That’s just the truth.”

“Jack… you deserve a hug if you want one, at least. Because everybody does.” Ren put the brush down and opened her arms.

The little girl looked at her warily for a long moment, crouched on the end of the bed like she was about to spring. Then she crept into Ren’s lap and nestled against her chest. Carefully, Ren closed her arms around her.

“Some mommies didn’t throw us in the river,” said Jack softly. “They let us be born and hugged and kissed us. Then they gave us to other mommies and went away and our new mommies let us starve until we were nothing but howling bones.”

“That’s not what happened yesterday,” Ren said, remembering what the enchanted Jack had said about the _worst_ mommies not even noticing when their little one was dragged away. “They stole you from me, and when I woke up I was very upset.”

“Hmm,” muttered Jack, rubbing her nose against Ren’s chest. “Is that true? We don’t know. Maybe if it is, we should go back inside and start over, so nobody could ever take us away again. And then you couldn’t get tired of us and give us away.” She looked up, her eyes glimmering. “That would be good, right, Mommy?”

Ren’s stomach clenched reflexively. “I think Ritsu would be pretty sad if that happened. She’d miss us.”

Jack’s mouth twisted in dissatisfaction. “Ritsu…guess that might be true.” She considered. “Ritsu’s nice and we’re supposed to help her, but she’s so busy she might not even notice.”

Ren shook her head a little and picked up the brush again. This time when she began to draw it through Jack’s hair, the Servant didn’t resist. Instead she sucked on one of her fingers, making little thoughtful noises.

As the magic charge began to build in her hair, Jack’s little shoulders relaxed a little. “I like berries. They don’t fill me up but they taste and pop so good!” Ren noticed the shift in Jack’s speech and her own shoulders loosened as well.

Then Jack said, “I think you should have another baby, Mommy,” and her shoulders tightened right back up again. “Another Servant baby like me, so we can play with each other when you’re busy doing grown-up stuff. The human babies are adorable but they’re so _fragile._ ”

“Um,” said Ren, floundering. “That… that would require Merlin’s help and I’m not…”

Jack twisted to look up at her, sniffing. “But you’ve already had Merlin’s help making another baby, right? We can smell it. We can _always_ smell _that_.”

Ren suddenly felt like throwing up, so strong was the surge of emotion that swept over her: rage and frustration, shame and confusion, and an impossibly wide vein of hurt. She dropped the brush, her arms clenching over her stomach, inadvertently pushing Jack off her lap.

“Mommy?” Jack sounded alarmed and Ren knew distantly she ought to reassure her, but all she could think of was the emotion flickering off and on Merlin’s face as he’d tried to laugh off what he’d done to her.

“Mommy? You didn’t want his help? Mommy, if I dismember him, will that fix it? Mommy, please don’t cry!”

Ren managed to open her arms and wrap them around Jack, pulling the little girl as close as she could, hiding her own face in Jack’s narrow chest. She wasn’t crying, she _wasn’t_ , but if she didn’t press something against her face she might yet.

Hesitantly Jack stroked her hair. “Does this help, Mommy? It helped me.”

“You are such a good girl, Jack,” said Ren, her voice muffled. “I’m not very strong alone, but I will _always_ fight for you and I will always come for you, okay?” She lifted her head to meet Jack’s gaze.

Jack ran cool fingers down Ren’s cheek, even though Ren was _sure_ she hadn’t shed even a tear. “You don’t have to, Mommy. We’re your Servant. We’re supposed to do the fighting.”

A hint of exasperation showed through Ren’s storm of emotion. “Shh, you. I’m going to be the mommy you deserve.” Her mouth tightened and she added, “And I’ll even get you that sibling. But… not today. We’ve had a long day already.” Merlin had no doubt fed well on what he’d induced in her, and he could damn well bear the cost.

Jack looked at her for a long moment. “Tomorrow?”

“Maybe?” Ren said. “Tomorrow or the next day, assuming nothing explodes.”

“Okay!” chirped Jack, as if that settled everything. Then she flopped in Ren’s lap again and said, “More brushing, Mommy!”

* * *

More than an hour later, Ren tucked a sleeping Jack in the bed, stroking her back for a while. When Astolfo, Ren and Tora came in talking about supper, she rose and followed them down to the kitchen, grateful that they allowed her to lend a hand without asking her any questions. And after they were done, dinner of sliced meat, grilled vegetables and more pancakes had to be carried on platters up to the Great Hall, because there were now too many of them to crowd into the kitchen.

Ren looked at her little army sitting on the floor as she picked at her own dinner. Merlin sat in the midst of Ritsu’s four little adopted siblings (the girl who had been locked in her house having been acquired that afternoon by certain troublemakers), with Ritsu and Jekyll nearby discussing magic theory. Astolfo and Flat, the above-mentioned troublemakers, sat together, both eating messily and laughing more than seemed sane. Jack sat close to Ren, keeping an eye on Merlin and the kids, while Tora sat near Ritsu, doing the same thing.

A traumatized demi-Servant soldier, an overly-serious child prodigy, four twisted Servants, four tiny children, and Flat. She was responsible for all of them. And then there was Cú, when he returned….

Before she could hesitate, before she could feel the curl of fear at the potential consequences again, Ren reached out along their shared connection for the Lancer.

_My lady? I’ll be back very soon._

His mental voice had a more intimate caress to it than he’d had before, and it made Ren’s stomach clench again. She pushed her plate over to Jack and hugged her knees, watching the children around Merlin. Ichigo, Kay, Pan and Lulu. They clearly trusted and adored the Magus of Flowers already. Ren almost envied them. Trust was a pleasant sensation, and the hole when it fled was the genesis of nightmares.

When Cú materialized a few moments later, right beside Ren, his arrival rippled through the supper party like a big rock in a small pond. Jekyll stopped talking to Ritsu and concentrated hard on his nearly finished dinner. Jack, long done with both her and Ren’s meal, gave Cú a hard, blank look. Merlin laughed at something a child said, without appearing to even notice the Lancer’s arrival. Tora smiled, while Astolfo said, “Oops!” to Flat, his head swiveling between Merlin and Cú and back again.

All in all, it wasn’t a set of reactions Cú could miss. His ruby gaze sharpened as he too inspected each of the room’s inhabitants before dropping to one knee beside Ren.

“My lady. I saw Lord Kirri to his HQ. Learned that he’ll be sending various supplies by wagon to this castle in a couple days.” Cú snorted. “He’s letting people believe whatever they want about his trip, and mostly they’re believing he conquered the fortress and left Tora in charge. He’s also going to write you a letter or something. Mind if I eat?”

“Please,” said Ren, glancing over at him and then looking down at her hands again. He snagged Jack’s plates and went to fill them both before returning to Ren’s side, silently passing one of the plates to Jack. Jack gave him a dubious look, before accepting the plate with a nod of approval. After that, he settled close to Ren, as close as Jack, watching her little army in silence.

Jekyll stayed quiet and Ritsu transferred the focus of her chattering to Tora. Merlin, on the other hand, grew even louder, doing magic tricks for the children and telling them little nonsense stories about each of the other Servants. Not once the whole dinner had he looked directly at Ren. She’d been waiting _(hoping)_ for even a glance, but… nothing.

Not that she wanted him to look at her anyhow. Meeting his gaze would just make her stomach hurt more.

As Cú finished eating, he put his hand on the small of Ren’s back:a simple, casual gesture that could mean so many things, ranging from _I’m here for you_ to _You’re mine._

Ren clenched her jaw. She wasn’t anybody’s. She’d enjoyed what she’d done with Cú unreservedly, and she’d do it again when he needed it. But at that particular moment, the thought of letting anybody’s hands rove over her, of being _used,_ made her want to hide away.

His fingers rubbed the tense muscles beside her spine as he said very quietly, “What happened while I was gone? You’re pissed, I can see that.”

“I recharged everybody else who needed it, and swapped Hyde for Jekyll.” She thought that concisely summed things up.

Cú cocked an eyebrow. “Ah, and that’s why you’ve got this murderous aura pouring off you? But Jekyll isn’t _that_ bad.”

“Merlin is,” piped up Jack. She was lingering over her third plate of dinner.

With a hard chuckle, Cú said, “You got that right, brat.” He fell silent for a moment and then said, “Lady, you remember when I told you that you ought to start sleeping with a knife?”

Startled, Ren glanced at him. “Yeah. You… you said I was beautiful.”

“Well, yeah,” he said, as if that was obvious. “What I kinda meant is that you don’t have to put up with anything you don’t want. Not with us Servants around… and not _from_ us Servants, either.” His hand lifted conspicuously from her back. “You don’t like something, all you have to do is say the word. You rule us, not the other way around.”

Ren drew in a deep breath and then exhaled, a certain tension flowing from her. For the first time since supper had started, that obsessive corner-of-the-eye awareness of what Merlin was doing faded away. She leaned toward Cú, and his shoulder was there for her, a warm, solid rest for her head.

As his hand once again settled on her back, she muttered, “I wish I could bring back something I liked just as easily.”

“Hey,” said Cú. “You got me back, yeah? Sometimes you can.”

“She’s got me, too,” Jack added. “Mommy should still have a knife, though. Knives dismember a lot of problems.”

“Yeah,” agreed Cú. “I’ll get her one soon.”

Ren closed her eyes, concentrating on her breathing: pushing out the bad and inhaling the good. While Cú was clearly trying to behave himself, she could just detect an echo of the possessive growl he’d given when Merlin had interrupted them under his words and the movement of his hand. It… didn’t bother her, given how he seemed to be handling it.

_Yeah, that made sense_ , she realized. He didn’t like complicated things. And apparently the best way in his mind to keep things simple was to hand her a knife and tell her to do whatever the hell she wanted, with whomever she wanted.

Good old Cú.

She lifted her head from his shoulder, straightening

“I’m going to be summoning a new Servant in a day or two,” she said quietly.

Cú’s fingers moved on her back. “Yeah? Good idea.” His voice was.a little louder than hers, just loud enough that it carried to others. “I bet your victory over Kirri will make a whole lot of enemies notice you, just as soon as they figure out he’s quietly betraying them.”

Tora winced at Cú’s word choice, but Merlin looked up from the children, directly at the Lancer. He didn’t say anything, but Ren recognized the hardness in his eyes from other strategy meetings. Once upon a time, it would have annoyed her.

Once upon a time, he would have been looking at her.

Ren cleared her throat. “Yeah. I want to take a day to rest and recover, if we’re allowed it. And then… we’ll summon more help.”

And finally, finally, Merlin focused his gaze on her. Something dark flickered across his face before he politely said, “Do you have any particular type of Servant in mind this time?”

Well, thanks to Jack, she did. But what kind of answer did she owe Merlin, he who refused to ever fucking explain himself to her?

“Oh yes,” she said, baring her teeth in a smile at Merlin. “But you’ll just have to wait and find out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this were a novel, somewhere around here is where I'd end Book 1. It's not, so I'm just going to keep going.


	48. The Rest

The next day was almost peaceful, even for Ren. A large portion of that near-peace came from Merlin conferring with Cú and then flitting off to ‘escort’ the wagons bearing supplies to the fortress. “I’m sure I can help them get here much faster,” he told Tora, who was standing near Ren at the time.

After he’d waved and dematerialized, Tora had edged over to Ren. “Lady Ren… I’m confused. Why is Merlin reporting to me?”

“Because I asked him to leave me alone for a while and he’s taking it very literally,” Ren informed her tartly.

“Oh,” said Tora thoughtfully. “My… my _Servant_ —” she touched her chest, “—whispers to me that he’s not to be trusted.” Her cheeks flushed as she added, “Especially not with you.”

“No,” said Ren and changed the subject. “Would you and Cú help me do some weapon training today? You have a sword, right?”

Between the training Cú inflicted with Tora’s help, cleaning out more of the fortress and keeping Flat and Astolfo from causing mischief, it wasn’t exactly a day of relaxation. When Merlin didn’t return by nightfall, what peace she _had_ gained evaporated. They’d moved the bed up to one of the upper rooms so people weren’t dining in her bedroom, and there she curled up on the mattress and tried to scold herself out of her misery. All she achieved was a restless, unhappy sleep full of incoherent nightmares.

The next morning Merlin appeared outside the fortress riding on the first of several wagons. The three wagons were loaded with foodstuffs, furniture, and lumber. The draft horses moved alertly, but the wagoneers all had a stunned, dreamy expression. When Merlin waved his staff and one of his reconstructed walls cracked open so the wagons could drive through to the courtyard, a formless rage churned within Ren that he’d caused her so much suffering over something he could resolve so easily.

“We’ll keep the horses and the wagons,” said Merlin cheerfully moments later as he supervised the unloading. “But I’ll send the drivers to the village to recover. They worked very hard getting everything here!”

Ren gave him a sidelong look. Everybody but the littlest children had joined in the unloading, so Merlin had to be talking to her. She could hardly believe it.

“Thank you,” she said distantly.

He winced. “Ren—”

Ren’s fingers curled into a fist. “Don’t.” She started to move to the nearest wagon. The flurry of activity would take her mind off the magus soon enough. Yesterday had demonstrated that.

His voice soft, he said, “I’m sorry.”

She stopped, her rigid back to him, waiting for anything else he might say. She didn’t know what she expected, or even what she wanted, but she knew a blanket apology wasn’t it. But as the silence behind her dragged on, her heart shivered and wilted and she braced her shoulders to go do productive work.

“You want more,” he said, his voice flat and emotionless. She glanced over her shoulder and saw that once again everyday ordinary Merlin had been superceded by his inhuman side.

“Why did you do it?” she asked, her heart jumping into her throat.

Despite the brightness of the morning, his purple eyes seemed almost black. “I wanted you,” he said calmly. “I still want you.”

Heat kindled low in Ren’s stomach as her stupid, treacherous body responded to his words. She tucked suddenly cold hands under her arms. “What are you sorry for, then?”

Merlin’s brow furrowed, as if her question puzzled him. “Hurting you. That was exactly what I didn’t want to do.”

Ren’s fingers dug into her tunic, and she lowered her eyes to hide the way they stung. Nothing she could think to say _meant_ anything. Some of it was cruel and some of it was trite and all of it was useless. Finally, swallowing the lump in her throat, she said, “I can’t talk about this right now. I’m going to summon another Servant soon. Go… go do what you have to make your mana faucet is turned up to max or whatever.”

Glancing up, she saw he’d finally found an emotion he thought was appropriate to the situation. He watched her with a gentle, wry sympathy that made her want to leap on him and claw the mild expression off his face. Instead she whirled around, scanned the courtyard and shouted, “Astolfo! Help me move that giant cupboard thing on the last wagon!”

<>

The giant cupboard turned out to be, well, a giant cupboard, complete with dishes held in place with leather straps. There were also several beds, packed flat and requiring assembly, chairs, additional futons, a good-sized table, two trunks full of what looked like sheets and tablecloths, another trunk fill of small household items like table clocks and writing supplies, a barrel of some kind of magic candle that made Ritsu’s eyes light up, and a basket full of stuffed and wooden toys.

In the freshly furnished great hall, while staring at the basket as the two youngest children knelt beside it, Tora said, “Most of this is my Lord’s own campaign furniture. Not… not the toys, though. Why are those here?”

“For the children, I imagine,” said Ren. “Didn’t you plan on trusting him with your sister?”

“Yes, but…” Tora frowned, shaking her head. “I’ve never actually seen him interact with a child. He’s… he’s not very fond of frivolous things.” Her cheeks turned pink. “He’s very kind, though, so it only makes sense.”

Feeling obscurely envious of Tora, Ren left her watching the children and went to gather her summoning team which today consisted of Merlin, Cú Chulainn, and Jack. But Jekyll, Astolfo and Flat all followed her down as well.

Ren surveyed the crowded summoning chamber. Ritsu’s little corner nest had been moved to one of the upper rooms where two of the smaller beds had been placed for Ritsu and the kids to share. Now Flat lurked there.

She gave him a dark look, but before she could order him out, he said, “Please let me stay, Lady! Just this once!” He’d taken to calling her that yesterday after toying first with _Master,_ very briefly trying _Mommy_ , and lingering on _Boss_ for a while.

Jekyll cleared his throat. “I think Flat may be able to give us useful insights on what’s going on when you summon, Master.”

Ren considered Jekyll. He’d also been avoiding her, ever since they’d pulled him to the surface the day before yesterday. She’d been too distracted to push, especially once she’d seen he was interacting normally with others. She didn’t know what he remembered when Hyde was in control, but she suspected whatever it was had probably solidified his dislike of her.

But his steady gaze now gave no sign of that. He was earnest, serious and focused on being helpful. And if he wanted to help her, even now…

She sighed. “Can you keep him out of trouble?”

“Yes, Master,” said Jekyll with a small bow, while Flat beamed.

Astolfo did a full on dance move. “You can’t kick me out while letting them stay, Master. I’m much more useful if trouble comes through.”

Ren threw her hands up in the air. “You’re going to regret it if we all get squished.” She turned to Merlin, who stood right beside Jack. “Are you ready?”

“Perfectly,” he said, with a bright smile. He went to extract his sword from his staff but as he did she pulled the knife Cú had acquired for her the previous day out of the pocket of her tunic.

“Here. Use this. No Origin alteration, unlike your sword.”

Merlin pursed his lips, accepting and inspecting the knife critically. It had a small, thin, double-edged blade the length of her hand and about as wide as two of her fingers at the base. Cú had spent some time sharpening it and scratching little runes into the blade before handing it to her and teaching her how to hold it to his throat or, as he put it, _more vulnerable parts_ lower down.

“How very mundane,” he said lighly. “I’ll have to see if I can improve it for you later.”

Steeling herself, Ren held out her hand. It wasn’t the cut she feared, but Merlin’s touch, and it hadn’t been wasted dread. His gentle fingers as he took her hand unlocked memories she’d tried to bury in the flurry of chores.

 _I still want you_.

She didn’t know what to do with that. Even if she wanted him too, it wasn’t enough.

“Serendipity?” he said, smiling, and she realized blood was leaking into her hand, cupped with Merlin’s. “Go to work.”

Ren glanced down at Jack, who gave her a wide hopeful smile that immediately refocused her on today’s agenda. “Right.”

She marched to the portal and concentrated a moment to organize her prayer. She’d keep it simple this time: exactly what Jack wanted, with one addendum for Ritsu, for whom they were all there.

_Child._

_Hero._

She flung a spray of crimson drops into the portal. In instant response, golden rays of light beamed out of the portal, silhouetting an even brighter silhouette. Ren squinted at the light, her mind already churning through drifts of barely verbalized story fragments. The silhouette was small, at least—

The golden light faded as the bright figure acquired detail. A young boy with golden hair and crimson eyes stood in front of Ren, his hands on his hips and a smile curving his mouth as he fearlessly met her gaze. She couldn’t help an answering smile curving her mouth, but the lessons of the past lingered and she didn’t wait before starting the traditional exchange.

“My name is Serendipity.” She studied him closely: surprisingly casual clothing, no obvious weapon, no scars, no marks.

“Hi, Serendipity,” said the boy cheerfully. “Do you know who I am? I _really_ hope so. This place looks pretty interesting.”

Ren narrowed her eyes, before glancing over her shoulder at where Flat bounced on his toes with his hands conspicuously behind his back. Jekyll had his hand on Flat’s shoulder, his brow as furrowed as Ren’s own as he stared at the young boy.

“Mommy?” said Jack, her eyes shining.

“Come on,” said the young boy encouragingly. “You can do it! I’m cheering for you!” But although her mind raced, she couldn’t find a match anywhere in what you knew until he added, “Do I have to say it to give you a clue? I’d rather not, you know. I mean, why be that mean? But…”

Ren blinked and then peered closer as the boy shaped a word silently. The careless arrogance of his bright smile combined with his glittering eyes… no. No.

“You’ve got it!” he said. “Just say it.”

Her throat was suddenly dry, and she cleared it before saying carefully, “Uh… you’re Gilgamesh.”

As lilac light flared around the two of them, the boy said, “Well done! Call me Gil.”

Jack scrambled past Ren to grab the child Gilgamesh by his shirt. “Hi! You’re my new baby brother! You have to play with me when we’re not killing things.”

Gil’s smile was soft as he looked down at the smaller girl. He patted her on the head as he said, “Definitely, big sister. But just one minute, okay? We’re not quite done here yet.”

“No…” said Merlin, his voice distant. “No, we’re not. You’re a freebie, King of Heroes?”

Cupping a hand to one ear as he glanced back at the portal, Gil said, “There’s definitely somebody else coming. Maybe who Miss Serendipity really wanted?”

“What?” said Ren, startled, because she _knew_ that Gil was _exactly_ who she’d prayed for. But as she met Gil’s sparkling eyes, she realized with foreboding that _he_ knew that too. “I—”

“Shh,” said Gil. “Let’s see who it is.” He reached back into the portal, his arm vanishing into the field of blue. When he pulled his hand back again he held a blue cloth that he drew after him as he stepped past Ren.He murmured, “Good luck,” and dropped the cloth.

The portal glowed in a far less dazzling fashion than it had with Gil, and then another Servant stepped through. The blue fabric Gil had held was part to a knotted mantle he wore over green armor. He had a sword at each hip, and short black hair with a single lock falling over his forehead. He was _breathtakingly_ handsome, especially when he smiled at her.

“Servant, Saber,” he said, his gorgeous brown eyes never leaving her own. “And I see there’s an additional rule here before I can cal you Master. Do you know it?”

In a reverent voice, Ren said, “I’m Serendipity, and you’re Diarmuid Ua Duibhne.” There was a pause, in which lilac light did not flare around them, and Ren blinked. “Am I wrong?”

“No, no.” He stepped forward, holding out his hand, and took her own, smiling at her again. “You’re my Master. Thank you for recognizing me.”

“But…” Ren looked around. Jekyll’s eyes were crimson again, and his hand on Flat’s shoulder seemed to be causing Flat some pain that Astolfo was trying to mitigate. Cú was watching Gil with narrow-eyed suspicion. And Merlin was staring very hard at Diarmuid, as if something displeased him.

“Just a bit of a delay as the magic recharges, I bet,” said Gil airily, while staring at Merlin. “If it takes too long, I’ll do something else!”

Merlin seemed to wake from his trance. “Well done, Serendipity. Two for the price of one.” Lilac light flared around Diarmuid and Ren, and she glanced back at her newest, and by far most handsome Servant.

A little shyly, she pulled her hand away from his. “You’re welcome here, Diarmuid. And you too, Gil. I’ll explain what’s going on—”

“Petals!” shouted Hyde, pushing Flat aside finally. “I am going to _kill_ _you_.”


	49. Sha Naqba Imuru

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I do not have Sha Naqba Imuru (Gilgamesh’s Clairvoyance power) this is only a guess of what it might be like from the point of view of the Wedge of Heaven. Please forgive me! I’ll be back to normal next chapter!

Gilgamesh, King of Heroes and metaphysically age 10, rocked on his heels with his hands behind his back as he watched the mischief he'd caused unfold.

The _(storybook hero)_ Berserker Hyde charged toward his _(nominal)_ Master’s oldest Servant, the _(devilishly fair)_ Caster Merlin, only to be blocked by his Master’s newest Servant, the _(devilishly fair_ ) Saber Diarmuid. There was a quick exchange of unarmed blows and then _(a man accepts his lies)_ Hyde whirled away, clutching his face as he crouched down. When he finally looked up at the Saber looming over him with cocked fist, his eyes were green again.

The _(ligature)_ Master, Serendipity, watched the exchange. She’d taken one complete step toward _(steel not iron)_ Hyde by the time the sequence had resolved and Gil approved of her reflexes. He [stroked]/pulled _(unborn)_ Jack’s hair as she jerked forward to protect her mama, and the Assassin wraith stopped, trusting him already.

The _(best of our heroes)_ Lancer in blue, Cú Chulainn, leaned on the wall with his eyes glued to his _(trying so hard it hurts him)_ Master and yet his casual pose hadn’t even flickered with tension when the Berserker charged. Meanwhile _(his eyes are a lie)_ Merlin had his gaze fixed on ( _Mystic Face)_ Diarmuid, his face masked with annoyance.

On the other side of the room’s entrance, _(the anomaly_ ) Flat rolled on the floor with his knee held to his chest, his face twisted in silent pain. _(The nice to pet)_ Astolfo couldn’t stop himself from lunging after Hyde, and approximately three seconds later was entangled in a heap with _(reaches too high)_ Jekyll at _(chewtoy EX)_ Diarmuid’s feet. They lay sprawled together, both shocked, as _(valiant)_ Diarmuid fought back a laugh above them.

 _(The newborn)_ Serendipity blinked and looked at ( _now among equals)_ Merlin, as if the humor of the pratfall hadn’t even registered. Instead her ( _lens)_ eye turned toward that she’d been focused ( _for_ ) on. Instantly the mage looked away, refusing to let her in. Except… He was _so very good_ at masking that Gil couldn’t help but admire him as the threat he represented. Something premeditated the Mage of Flowers' each twitch and movement; something very, very clever and yet not yet wise enough to recognize itself in a mirror.

 _(The painfully unsurprised)_ Cú rolled his eyes and turned his gaze to Gil, watching again as he’d been watching before. He didn’t trust Gil, because he too was descended of Gods, but he could see enough to know he couldn’t hide his feelings and so he didn’t bother.

Alone beside Gil, Jack laughed at Rider and the other Assassin, shrieking with giggles as she clutched her stomach. She laughed because Gil laughed, so it was up to him to calm her.

“Sorry!” called Gil ( _responsibility is a drag)_ and gently snugged Jack close under one arm. “Good job, Serendipity! You’ve got a full set! Now what are you going to do?”

Merlin really wanted Gil to think the girl was driving him to distraction. He stared hard at her as soon as she looked at the others, his mouth twisting and his eyes dark. It was a fine act but Gil preferred the fundamental honesty of the Lancer.

“Well,” said _(recap voice)_ Serendipity. “I guess the first thing to do is fill you in on what you’ve been summoned into.”

Gil put his finger to his cheek, pretending to think for just long enough. “Hm. Y’know, I can just pick all that stuff up on my own. But you ought to definitely fill in Saber. Have a one on one! And I’ll let Jack show me around the castle.”

Not at all by coincidence, he stood closest to the door, so without waiting for a response and carrying _(enthralled)_ Jack under one arm, he [dashed]/strolled out the door just enough to be out of sight. Putting the child down, he put a finger to his lips. She understood instantly and put a finger to her lips as well. Then they both tilted their heads and listened.

At least three throats vibrated with recklessly chosen words, but it was _(too good too pure)_ Diarmuid who beat them all when he said, “Ah, Master. I don’t think a private meeting would be a good idea.”

“What?” said Jekyll, and Cú, and Merlin, their confusion piling up around unspoken words.

“Uh?” said Ren, because _What_? would have made her sound too entitled. Besides, she too was starting to get confused. She didn’t sleep enough.

“How much of my legend do you know?” Diarmuid _(he earned that mark making love to a goddess)_ inquired gently.

“Oh! Ahaha. That. Is that thing even working?” _(the innocence of the second dawn)_ Ren’s voice ran through an array of emotions and ended on curiosity

With a smile in his voice, _(charmed)_ Diarmuid said, “My love spot? I hope not. I can usually keep it under control. But the only ones who know that for sure, Master, are you and me. Your other retainers would prefer—oh. Oh my God. Is that Cú Chulainn? Master, we should definitely include _him_ in our discussion. Do you know who he is?”

Gil started laughing again quietly, and ( _start with zero)_ Astolfo’s head poked out of the room at knee level. “Get out of here!” the paladin whispered, grinning. “Go play while you still can.”

The King of Heroes, now satisfied with what he’d wrought, grinned back at Astolfo before grabbing _(big sister)_ Jack’s hand again and running up the stairs to explore more of his new playground.


	50. Letter Fragments

(from Lord Kirri, to Lady Serendipity)

Forgive me for addressing these letters to Tora; it’s a necessary measure for now. I am reconfiguring my forces in the regions I govern to reduce the chances of revolt when the truth of our alliance is revealed. That will happen sooner than I like, as my erstwhile mistress, Queen Mada, is unfortunately aware of my transformations into Avenger. I can delay reporting to her, but true deception is impossible. When discovery comes it will come with an extremely swift response.

With that in mind, I think it would be useful if one of your Servants was stationed in my headquarters, as Tora informs me they maintain telepathic communication with you. However, while we are operating undercover, it would be best to send somebody equally adept in remaining discreet and blending in. I specifically request you not send the blue spearman to me again, as something about him makes my Avenger extremely aggressive.

I will continue sending resources to your fortress, as I believe protecting that portal is of paramount importance. While I am not privy to the plans of my superiors in the Sovereigns, I know that capturing and capping summoning portals is a crucial component. The mirrors that melded Saber with Tora and Avenger with myself are also related to whatever they scheme, and we are by no means the only ones selected to trial this new familiar system. Perhaps whoever you send to my HQ can also instruct me in how to permanently put down others like Tora and myself.

Unfortunately, even though you have swayed me to your view that there is another way, I will not be able to quickly unblock the portals in my regions. It is not a system meant to be easily reversed, but I have been looking into it for some time and I’m certain it can eventually be done, especially if we can capture certain resources Queen Mada has under her control.

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(from Serendipity to Kirri)

Tora is writing this for me, because while I have no trouble reading your fine script, my handwriting is not likewise readable for others. Thank you for your material support. Already the fortress is far more pleasant a habitation, and soon it will also be a far more secure one. I hope your lieutenants have fully recovered from their trials? I imagine their strength will be very helpful when it comes to dealing with any trouble from below.

As to your request for a Servant to be assigned to you, I am still determining what to do. The most obvious and best-suited of my Servants has displayed feelings similar to your Avenger’s at the thought of being removed from his previous assignment. Given that Servants are generally dangerous and this one is particularly unpredictable, I have chosen not to send him to you unwilling. As a temporary solution, I’m sending you Merlin. He’s hardly inconspicuous but as he is perfectly capable of remaining both invisible and intangible, I hope he will not cause you too much trouble. While he is also reluctant to exert himself, I trust him to represent my interests to you.

I am also sending two of my companions, Astolfo and Flat, on a flying tour of the local regions, explicitly to study the portals in your domain. If you recieve reports of a hippogriff with two riders spooking your troops, my apologies in advance. My options are limited.

Please tell me what you can about Queen Mada. My Servants, while sometimes particular about their duties, are eager to be of service. With time on their hands the younger ones turn to mischief while the older ones will fight even each other over irrelevant small stupid (honestly Lord Kirri, I don’t understand what they’re fighting over —Tora) meaningless things.

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(from Kirri to Serendipity)

Your associate Merlin has arrived, but he informs me he is under strict orders to only contact you telepathically in an emergency, so I shall continue sending you letters via my familiars for now. He seems to be a very playful personality but also a very acute judge of character. I find myself wishing he would spend more time in this silent and invisible state you mention.

Troop reconfiguration continues apace. I am organizing some combat exercises that will put soldiers in certain key locations to supplement Chalice’s defenses. So far I have managed to keep quiet the ~addition~ of your fortress to my domain by convincing my less reliable subordinates that I wish to present it so as to add luster to Tora’s conquest. (For some reason it is commonly believed that Tora is a personal favorite, and allowing this rumor has occasionally been convenient.)

The Witch Queen Mada is a woman feared even among those who technically outrank her, or so I understand. My perspective on her is somewhat biased, as I have served her since I was a very young man and she has had a strong influence in my life. I am one of the youngest of her protégés and my brethren, her Knights, represent a significant and imminent threat to our efforts. If my mistress acts as I anticipate, one or more of them will be dispatched to investigate my delay in reporting to her. While technically I can deceive them, it is more likely to be the the beginning of a new phase of operations, as generally speaking we do not get along…

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(from Kirri to Serendipity)

It was quite novel to receive your latest message via Merlin, especially as he has been much quieter since delivering it.

I am expecting an investigative visit from several of Queen Mada’s Knights soon. She seeks to understand my delay in reporting directly to her, which I have avoided due to my inability to deceive her. Depending on whether I have to kill them, our subterfuge may end the day of their arrival. I will communicate news via Merlin…

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(from Kirri to Serendipity)

To supplement the news I sent via Merlin, I enclose the following maps of our current troop positions. Chalice and your fortress are well-protected from invading armies for now. Unfortunately my ability to stop single individuals, especially those as talented as Queen Mada’s Knights, is limited. I have my lieutenants stationed at likely routes, and I have not given any sign that there is anything of interest in Chalice, which may help. I have allowed them to think that after capturing Chalice I decided to rebel purely out of a desire for power myself. I had to kill one of my brother Knights to support this deception, but I assure you, I never liked him much…

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(From Tora to Kirri)

My lord, I write as myself today with a request. Can you ask Merlin if he can reach out to Lady Ren? We cannot locate her and our Archer suggested that Merlin may succeed where the rest of the Servants have failed. They are all quite certain she is alive, but more than that cannot be determined…

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(From Kirri to Tora)

I conveyed your message to Merlin and judging from his reaction, I believe he was neither aware of Lady Ren’s absence, nor able to contact her as he usually does. I _hope_ he has returned to report to you, but I know too well how passions aroused can lead to ignoring standard operating procedures. In any case, he is no longer with me. Who is currently operating as Lady Ren’s second in command? I wish to coordinate with them on the search for Lady Ren, as I have some concerns about Lady Mada’s Knights. I very much fear one of them may be involved in her disappearance.

So far, Queen Mada has not mobilized troops to retake my territory, but I believe news of my betrayal is spreading among the upper ranks and they wait only to see how quickly she can bring her straying dog to heel. I am very much looking forward to surprising them…


	51. A Shadow Falls

The bars of sunlight in the Great Hall lengthened, but Jekyll’s careful circuit of one of them as he paced never once passed through the sunshine, although he hardly seemed aware of his surroundings. He muttered to himself, one hand to his temple: denials, refusals and pleas for patience that never seemed to bring him away from the brink of madness.

With great effort, he seemed to be keeping his darker half suppressed in the wake of Lady Serendipity’s disappearance. But Diarmuid, watching him, wondered what that actually meant when suppression rendered Jekyll nonfunctional.

Tora came up the stairs and offered Diarmuid a flatbread full of sliced meat, carrying a half-eaten one of her own. “How’s he doing?”

“Thank you,” said Diarmuid, accepting the snack. With Serendipity gone, it was more important than ever to eat regularly. Until she returned, the Servants would mostly be operating at near-mortal levels. “I don’t think he’s making very much progress beating back his beast.”

With a sidelong look at Jekyll, Tora shrugged. She hadn’t liked it very much when Jekyll had frightened Lady Ritsu by roaring at her to get away that morning. They’d tried to keep the children away from Jekyll, at his own desperate request, but Ritsu was hard to refuse. With Serendipity gone, she was the closest thing they had to a Master, even if she was far too young to be any kind of a commander.

“Maybe we should do more than watch. I don’t like that we haven’t heard from Lady Ren yet,” she finally said. “We need to be looking for her, and _he’s_ making that a lot harder.”

Diarmuid shifted uncomfortably, and then finished his flatbread rather than responding. Cú Chulainn had told him to stay at the castle while the Lancer dealt with Serendipity’s disappearance, and the Archer Gil had also suggested they ought to wait until—

Merlin materialized next to Diarmuid. “My my my,” he said vaguely and a little too loudly.

After that, without even glancing around, he strode over to Jekyll, grabbed him by the arm, and yanked out a few strands of the Assassin’s blond hair. Lilac light pulsed around them and there was a flurry of movement too fast to track. Then Jekyll sprang away from Merlin, landing in a feral crouch.

Merlin, a pearly sheen outlining his form, was unmoved by whatever had occurred. He held out his palm toward Jekyll, with a handful of tiny things glinting in his palm, and said, his voice serene, “Finders keepers, Hyde?”

Diarmuid blinked, looking more closely at the crouched form. His eyes seemed green from where Diarmuid stood, and his build remained slight, but the body language was definitely not the doctor’s usual, even over the past two days. Perhaps it was some sort of inbetween state.

Slowly Jekyll (or possibly Hyde) stood up, tugging off one of his gloves. Then he moved close enough to snatch the rings from Merlin’s palm. As he placed one over each finger, he said, “You can bet if I find her, I’m keeping her, Petals.”

Merlin smiled, a broad, strange expression in the situation. “Just what I wanted to hear.” He whirled away, looking toward Diarmuid and Tora, and murmured, “Let me just catch up.”

His gaze went distant for a long moment. While he was distracted, Hyde circled him, watching him like a cat stalking a bird. It made Diarmuid uncomfortable enough that he started forward to wrangle the Berserker.

Then Hyde held up a hand toward Diarmuid and said, in a voice eerily like Jekyll’s, “No, no, I’m fine. Just stretching my legs. I’ve been _so busy_ after all, sitting here doing nothing while Master is _gone_ , stolen by _somebody_ and _nobody is finding her_ —” He coughed. “I’m _fine_. Stretching my legs. What _are_ you doing, Petals?” Suddenly he was spinning a knife in one hand.

Merlin’s eyes widened although he remained distracted. A black expression passed over his face. Then he shook his head and smiled as his focus returned. “How very obscene. There’s a hole in what I can see,” he said softly. “Ah, Gilgamesh, Jack, just the two I wanted to see.”

Diarmuid glanced at the door, where Gil stood, smiling faintly as he held Jack’s hand. Jack clung to his hand with both of hers, her eyes red and her posture that of an animal on the verge of fleeing. The Archer had spent a great deal of time over the past two days keeping Jack from running off into the forest to track down her ‘mommy.’ If Serendipity hadn’t given Jack standing orders to protect Ritsu, Diarmuid doubted Gil would have managed even that much.

“What do you know?” asked Merlin quietly.

Jack narrowed her eyes at him. “Mommy’s _gone_.”

Placing a hand on Jack’s head comfortingly, Gil said, “Some mongrels have the most unpleasant little talents.” He bared his teeth in what might have been a smile. “I can only wonder what else we’re not seeing.”

“It does have shades of a trap,” said Merlin, as if agreeing with Gil. “Very well. Diarmuid, where’s Cú? I expected him to be in charge here.”

Diarmuid dragged his gaze away from Hyde and his knife. “The Child of Light went to find Lady Serendipity. He hasn’t returned since then.”

Merlin’s gentle smile twitched. “Did he have any _leads_? And while I’m asking questions, is there a reason you informed me _by letter?_ ”

“Be reasonable, Merlin,” said Gil, before Diarmuid could answer. “Who would have gone to fetch you? We were all busy here. She’s not dead, and she’s not calling for us.”

“That we know of,” said Merlin shortly. “But I agree that she’s not dead.” He glanced at Hyde, who smiled at him nastily, and then at Diarmuid. “Very well, Diarmuid, what would you have me do?”

Diarmuid narrowed his eyes. He was the newest Servant, the least close to Lady Serendipity, and definitely the least wise. Well, except for Jack, who would never command anything, and Hyde, who he wouldn’t trust with a shovel, let alone those knives. But surely Tora, at least—?

He glanced at the human woman and noticed how her own eyes were red and tired, and how she looked down at the ground rather than at anybody in particular. Although she wasn’t close to Serendipity like Jack and Hyde were, she’d revealed to Diarmuid just how much she’d drawn on Serendipity as a source of hope for the future.

Suddenly he understood why Merlin wanted him to make decisions. It was _because_ he was the least close to their summoner. He liked her well enough, and he understood her goals and agenda, but the emotional impact of her disappearance had been curiosity and worry rather than panic. He could still pursue her plans, even if he never saw her again.

On the other hand, although it may not have started that way, Hyde, Merlin and even Cú all served the woman, not her cause. And, in serving the woman, they might sacrifice her interests. But still… “Can you find our Master? Without her for magical energy replenishment, we’re far more limited in accomplishing her aims.”

The smile that curved Merlin’s mouth made Diarmuid uneasy, as if he’d walked into a trap. “Yes, I’ll work on that. Perhaps an acquaintance of mine will be able to help as well.” He tapped his staff on the flagstones. “Avenger! Come forth.”

A dry voice from the shadows near the ceiling corner nearest Diarmuid said, “I’m here, magus.” He stepped back, looking up warily as a Servant formed from the darkness and descended to the floor. He wore a black cloak and a black hat, and radiated such a violent aura that Diarmuid found himself instinctively glancing at Hyde to compare them.

Hyde’s eyes were fully red and he stared at Avenger like it was hate at first sight, twisting his knife around his hand even faster. Softly, as if to himself, he said, “What’re you doing, Petals? What are you playing at? We don’t want him, no we don’t. He’s bad news.”

Avenger, meanwhile, ignored Hyde completely. Flatly he said, “I can’t tell you more than you can already see about the girl’s disappearance, but I’ve been investigating some other interesting details. If I find her along the way, I’ll do something about it.”

“How is he still here, Petals?” demanded Hyde, more loudly, his voice a rasp instead of Jekyll’smodulated cadences.

Merlin gave Hyde a gentle smile. “It seemed like a shame to let him fade away before he could be useful, so I’ve helped him remain, yes.”

Hyde paced toward Avenger. “I don’t like it. He’s not our Master’s Servant. If he finds her, he could do all sorts of things to her.” His gaze went distant and he paused midstep, as if considering the vast list. “All sorts of _bad_ things… and fun things… and…” His gaze snapped back to Avenger. “I don’t like it.”

The Avenger worked on lighting a cigarette, without acknowledging Hyde in the slightest, which Diarmuid considered foolhardy in the extreme. No matter how powerful Avenger was—and Diarmuid knew from basic Grail knowledge that Avengers were never weak—it was never wise to ignore a pissed off Berserker, especially one who had at least partially defeated an enraged Cú Chulainn.

Then Avenger said, without looking up from his cigarette, “Call off your dog, Merlin, or else all the trouble you went to in unleashing him will be wasted.”

Merlin said, “You might be—” and Hyde jumped toward the Avenger. Avenger moved at almost the exact same instant, flickering to the other side of the Great Hall. “—be surprised,” finished Merlin. “Hyde, weren’t you going to go find Serendipity?”

Avenger relit his cigarette while Hyde frowned. When he spoke it was in the Jekyll-like voice once more. “I’ll get around to it. But some of us have to be careful with our magical energy.” The smile that cracked across his face was chilling. “There’s only so many ways we can get it back.”

Gil said brightly, “That reminds me, I’m supposed to be babysitting. Come on, Jack! I’m sure Merlin will find Ren for us!”

“Are you?” muttered Merlin, in a voice Diarmuid wasn’t meant to overhear. Then, more loudly, he said, “Avenger and I will get to work, too. If I don’t find her sooner, I’ll check in after a couple days, Diarmuid. But I’m sure you’ll be just fine managing this crew. Heheh. Better you than me!” He bowed and dematerialized. Avenger left at the same time, the same way he arrived.

Diarmuid realized they were back in the same situation they’d been in before: a holding pattern, fortifying a castle and supervising a psychopath while waiting for those with more initiative to return from having all the fun. “Next time Merlin comes back, I think it’s my turn to go out looking for trouble.”

“Go now,” suggested Hyde, grinning nastily. “I’m sure everything will be just fine here without you.”

Tora finally dragged her gaze up from the floor, her eyes glinting gold. “The promise to nail your hands to the floor still stands, Berserker.”

“ _You_ ,” said Hyde, scowling. “Why are you still here? God, you were annoying last time.”

“The real question is why are _you_ still here?”

“‘Cause Petals doesn’t want me to be,” said Hyde. He threw himself into one of the dining chairs and started to clean his nails. “So I’ll stick around here until I figure out where she is.” He smiled at his knife. “Or until I get bored.”

“No bloodshed of humans,” said Tora insistently, and her voice was a strange mix of regal command and worried village defender.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” said Hyde dismissively. “Sure, whatever.”

Diarmuid recalled that Tora had a mostly domant demi-Servant bound to her. He’d almost forgotten about that because as competent as she was, Tora still fell directly into the category of ‘people to be protected’ for him. But if even a hint of her presence could keep Hyde under control, Diarmuid was _really_ looking forward to meeting her. Maybe she’d spar with him.

But that didn’t seem likely to happen now. Sighing at the burden of responsibility, Diarmuid said, “If you’ll keep an eye on him, I’ll get back to the fortifications.”

Tora nodded absently, her gaze fixed on a Berserker determinedly ignoring her, so Diarmuid went back to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, the new arc has officially kicked off. I'm looking forward to writing it. Expect a lot of focus on the Servants, but don't worry, Serendipity is still around... somewhere. :-)


	52. Castle Break

When night came early to the Summoner’s Castle at Chalice, there were thirteen within: five children, four Servants, 3 helpers from the village and Tora, keeping watch on the walls as the others had their dinner. Diarmuid had pointed out there wasn’t much point to fortifications if they weren’t manned, especially in a world where people had flying mounts and other strange magics.

As it turned out, he was right about that, although a lot more right about the strange magic than the usefulness of manning the fortifications.

The early night that fell over the Summoner’s Castle was the night of sunlight fading away, of thoughts sliding off emptiness, and above all of _not noticing_. And Tora wouldn’t have noticed at all, except for her little night lizard familiars, which knew true night from illusion, and how the wind changed when the sun set. It didn’t change here. They chittered wordlessly in her mind as they swarmed over her, waking her from a confused daydream she was too happy to forget.

She didn’t shout a warning. Instinct told her it wouldn’t matter. Instead she sent the night lizardsscurrying away from her as she concentrated hard on the empty spots in her vision. The fortress’s entrance… where was it? She knew where it should be but when she looked directly at that wall, all she saw was…

What was she looking for again? Her mind, with no input to latch onto, slipped away once again into daydreams.

.

.

Artoria Alter flattened herself against the top of the wall. She could sense no more than her host, but her innate magic resistance made her much better able to _think_ about what she couldn’t see. Something was invading. She could see flurries of dust and flickering shadows, but nothing else. Rolling back to her knees, she put her back against the rampart. Brute force would be ideal here, but she wasn’t sure if or when she’d be able to use Morgan Excalibur again. For the moment she would keep her Master safe, and wait for an opportunity to do something useful.

===

The night lizards skittered across the courtyard garden, pouring into the Great Hall through the cracked door. While the volunteers from the village had preferred to eat in the kitchen, everybody else ate at the table in the Great Hall.

At a glance it looked like a school meal, with seven children, Diarmuid as the headmaster and Hyde as the really bad example. It sounded like that, too, with the children all talking on top of each other as they discussed their day.

Diarmuid was eyeing Hyde uneasily, wondering about leaving him with the kids for a few minutes while he checked on Tora. The Berserker been better than his counterpart had seemed to expect with the little ones. He mocked and sneered at them freely, but he seemed to find them less irritating than Diarmuid secretly did. But it had been concerning how he’d eyed young Kay, eldest girl among Ritsu’s orphans, as she left the table to run to the hall beyond where there was a water closet.

“Diarmuid, look,” said Gil, pointing as the night lizards scuttled around the door.The little familiars so rarely appeared with Tora, and almost never without her.

Diarmuid looked, and frowned as the vague foreboding he’d been feeling flowered into a certainty. “Something’s wrong.” They’d heard nothing from Tora, despite the night lizards and the dimness outside.

“Oh goodie, something’s finally happening,” said Hyde happily. His red eyes acquired green glints and he disappeared into the cloak of Presence Concealment.

The Great Hall doors creaked open a little more, revealing an empty corridor and and the big keep double doors opening onto a courtyard full of stomach-churning emptiness, distortions Diarmuid couldn’t focus on. He moved toward the open door. He didn’t know what was going on, but he knew how to react.

Springing forward, he kicked the door closed. “Jack! Go as well.”

Jack jumped up, green sparks dancing in her eyes. “Kill and dismember?”

“Yes!” Diarmuid had his swords in his hands. An emptiness had slipped through the door before he’d slammed it closed, and now it crept around him toward the table full of children. It puzzled him that he could both see and not see the entity but he was too good at his job to be slowed down by such mysteries. He lunged at the emptiness, one sword low, one sword high. It compressed, avoiding both blades, but he could feel when the invisible enemy’s attention—and aggression—focused on him rather than the children.

He exhaled, analyzing the mental blueprint of the keep he’d constructed over the past weeks. The stairs to the underground floor were housed in a little room with a doorless opening to the Great Hall, with a narrow door, normally closed, on the far side leading to the corridor sandwiched between the Great Hall and the outer wall. But now that door was cracked open. That could have been Jekyll leaving, but—

“Gil, get the children someplace safe,” he ordered, stepping and slashing at the emptiness. It dodged him once again, jumping back further into the Hall, away from both the stairs down and the exit.

When it counterattacked, Diarmuid’s only clue was the emptiness vanishing. He swept his swords around defensively. Metal skidded against one blade to his left front and he flicked it away, even as something else bit through his armor and into his flesh on his lower back.

“There’s more than one,” called Gil, as he herded a trio of confused children toward the stair entrance.

Ritsu followed him. “They’ve come for the portal!”

Diarmuid blocked another invisible attack and whirled around to trip a distortion in the air. He felt the strike, but once again, a blade (small, not a sword) slice through his armor.

One of Gil’s portals hummed open and three swords pierced the door on the opposite side of the stairwell. Then he gestured the children down as Diarmuid continued to keep the two unseen attackers from getting closer to the stairs.

At the base of the stairs, more portals hummed. Ritsu shrieked, “Where’s Kay?” just as swords zipped away. Several men cried out in pain: invaders who had made it downstairs under the cover of whatever hellsent stealth blanketed the castle.

Gil poked his head back up the stairs a few seconds later. “Kay’s not down here. The villagers have barricaded themselves in the kitchen. I’m taking the kids out through the root cellar.”

Eye contact served as acknowledgement and then Diarmuid switched from defense to offense, driving back the slower of the two distortions. He would buy time for Gil, and then he’d have to go find the missing child himself.

===

Ritsu kept hearing Gil’s portals humming into existence as she ran down the hall behind her orphans, and the sound of his projecile swords zipping away from her. Nobody else screamed. No more bodies thumped to the ground. But enough blood had already splashed the walls.

There’d been three men in forest uniforms moaning on the floor from being pierced by the Archer’s swords, and then more portals had hummed, and the moans stopped. Gil had baby Lulu in his arms and little Pan on his back, both with their faces hidden against him. But Ichigo, eldest and already so traumatized from his time as a fairy mount, hopped over the bodies easily. When he glanced over his shoulder at Ritsu, he had a grim look on his face. Her heart clenched and she squeezed her foxette so tightly it chittered.

The adults kept talking about how Ritsu was lucky, but what good was Ritsu’s luck when it hadn’t been able to save Ichigo from the nightmares that tormented him nightly after Serendipity had sent Merlin away? What good was Ritsu’s luck when Tora had been hurt so badly by the Sovereigns? What good was luck when her world was _dying_?

Gil sent his swords clattering into a room at the end of the subterranean hall and then darted after them. When Ritsu skidded into the empty storage cellar, Gil was already boosting Ichigo up to a narrow hatch. Her foxette ran down her arm and leapt, catching onto Ichigo’s pants with tiny claws and clinging to him as he wriggled through the opening.

“Clear,” he hissed.

“Be careful! They’re _invisible_ ,” Ritsu hissed angrily, even as Gil hoisted Lulu up into Ichigo’s waiting hands. This was madness. “Why didn’t you send me up first?! I at least have a little—” The look in Gil’s eyes, like she was an adorable idiot, silenced her.

The distant sound of metal clashing together and running feet sent her surging forward toward the window. As soon as Gil had pushed Pan into Ichigo’s hands, he made a step for Ritsu and boosted her up. Ichigo had backed away from the hatch to let Ritsu pull herself up. She was the biggest of them and it was a little bit of a squeeze.

As she squirmed and Gil pushed on her feet, a rough male voice said, “Aha, here we are!”

Ichigo gasped and Pan squeaked. Ritsu blinked, peering into the shadows, and then shoved herself through the opening and stumbled toward the big soldier who’d grabbed Ichigo by his hair. He had a short sword in his free hand.

_Not Ichigo. Not again._

The foxette on Ichigo’s shoulder squealed and leapt into the soldier’s face. With a grunt, he slashed at the familiar. It shrieked, the sound a knife in Ritsu’s heart. Then she’d wrapped her arms around Ichigo and tumbled with him away from the soldier, landing hard on her shoulder and head as she cushioned the smaller child against her.

“You!” snarled the soldier. “You’re the girl—”

Archer’s portal hummed open, and the soldier gagged and then gurgled. Ritsu opened her eyes. Even with blurred vision, she could see the blood spraying from the soldier’s throat around the sword that had impaled him.

Then the sword evaporated and the soldier fell. Gil finished slithering through the hatch and grabbed Pan and Lulu under each arm. “Ritsu, you okay?”

She tried to talk, and realized she still felt that knife in her heart from the foxette’s injury. Ichigo struggled against her and she opened her arms to let him get up. Then she stared up at the twilight sky, thinking absently about how sometimes darkness was more than a lack of light. The sun hadn’t set, not yet, but it was still _so_ dark…

“The foxette…” said Ichigo uncertainly.

“Oops!” said Gil. A moment later, he placed somegthing very small and warm on Ritsu’s chest. The foxette chirped wearily and Ritsu slowly wrapped her hands around it.

“My head hurts,” she said thickly. She could feel how injured her foxette was.

_But not dead. Not gone like Tora’s Aleron…_

Ichigo pulled Ritsu to a sitting position and then said, “This mist…”

Gil looked down at the low-lying mist rising from the ground around them. Then he put Lulu on his head and lifted Pan to his shoulder. “Stand up now, Ritsu. We have to hurry.”

Slowly, Ritsu stood up. Between the injury to her foxette and the bump on her head, she was just about able to follow instructions but not much more.

Gil shook his head and then whispered, “Jack, Jack, Jackie…” before herding them back behind the outbuildings toward the back wall of the keep.

A moment later Jack bounded into view, her face and hands covered in blood and her green eyes blazing with fury. “Ritsu’s hurt!”

“Keep your mist away from us, big sister,” advised Gil. “They can’t handle it.”

“Of course not,” said Jack scornfully and the mist parted around them. “Why did Ritsu get hurt?” She ran over to her charge and danced around her worriedly. “Will Mommy be mad? I was dismembering like Saber said!”

“And eating, I see,” said Gil, pushing aside some skeletal shrubberies near the wall.

Sulkily, Jack said, “Had to use the mist. There’s bad guys out there. Servants. What are we doing now? Should I kill them all?”

Ritsu reached out to stroke Jack’s pale hair. “ We can’t let them have the portal.”

Sharply, Gil said, “We can’t let them have you. Jack, I’m getting them out of here and then I’m going to see what I can do about the invaders. What would Serendipity want you to do?”

“Protect Ritsu,” said Jack decisively, before giving Ritsu a worried look. “She’s got a funny look on her face, Archer.”

“She’ll be okay if you can keep her alive,” said Gil briskly. He snapped his fingers and a portal opened right beside the far wall. “Okay, kids. Here’s a new game! I’m going to toss you through my portal. You’re going to see a lot of gold, and then you’re going to be in the forest. Hold your breath until you see the forest. Jack, you’re first!”

===

Once Diarmuid was confident that the children had made it to the root cellar, he slung himself around his invisible enemies and threw open the Great Hall doors once again. Jumping into the courtyard, he looked around. Just visible through an evaporating low mist were several corpses with their chests ripped open, arranged in a rough path around the side of keep. Other distortions shimmered, leaving trails in the mist that really was one of Jack’s best weapons.

The older girl of Ritsu’s orphans, the girl Kay, stood on the courtyard swing looking both frightened and determined as she stared at the bodies left behind by one of her new playmates. Diarmuid thought she couldn’t be more than six or seven, but she faced the violence before her with a grim fortitude that made him angry.

Then, all at once, the field of stealth cloaking the invaders in the courtyard dropped entirely. A cool breeze blew the remnants of the mist into nothingness. Almost two dozen armed men appeared scattered around the courtyard. Too many of them were around the swing. While corpses hadn’t rattled the little girl, the sudden appearance of five armed men descending on her made her shriek in terror.

Before Diarmuid could respond, there was a dark flare of magical energy from the wall and a black-armored figure jumped into the midst of the figures around Kay. Diarmuid blinked, almost recognizing the figure. She scooped up the girl with one arm, while sweeping a sword—a _familiar_ sword—around her in an arc of crackling black lightning. The soldiers scattered.

Diarmuid’s heart pounded as it hadn’t since he was summoned here. “Artoria?” he whispered, stepping toward her.

But if it was Artoria, she was severely weakened as well as blackened. Although her initial mana burst had driven back her enemies, he could see that was literally all she had going for her. Though she remained ready for the next assault, it was courage over a hollow shell.

_Tora_ , Diarmuid realized. Artoria was Tora’s Demi-Servant. That was _Tora_ saving Kay. And she would stagger and fall under a concerted assault.

Shaking his head, Diarmuid jumped again, landing beside her. “Let me help, Lady,” he said, flourishing his swords.

Artoria gave him a furious look. “If you want to help, pretty boy, get us out of here.”

Diarmuid ran an experienced eye over the field of soldiers moving toward him, and he added what he saw to the two invisible figures he’d battled inside, both of whom qualified as serious threats to a distracted warrior. When a big, blond man covered in scars jumped down from the roof of the Keep, Diarmuid immediately recognized him as the same kind of Servant as Artoria—except not weakened at all.

He glanced at wide-eyed Kay, and nodded, sheathing his swords. “As you command.” Then, taking the liberty of sliding his arm around Artoria’s waist, he tightened his grasp and once again jumped as only he could, carrying Artoria and the child with him into the forest beyond the keep.

===

Gil came around the fortress just in time to see Diarmuid leap away with Tora’s Demi-Servant form in his arms. Wryly, he muttered, “How romantic,” before taking in the soldiers who’d invaded the keep. If he’d kept count properly, that meant that of all Serendipity’s Servants, only he and possibly Hyde were left within to repel the assault.

He leaned against the front keep wall, watching the soldiers run around, considering the possibilities. That he could kill all the mundane soldiers without trouble was not in question. But there was much more than the mundane at work here, and revealing exactly what he could do before running away didn’t seem like very much fun.

“Oy, kid!” called the blond, scarred Demi-Servant who had been moving among the soldiers. “You look too weak for a good fight. Surrender, so I don’t waste my time.”

Gil considered this, too. Then, grinning, he said, “Nah!” He skipped away from the Demi-Servant’s grab, and then ran toward the castle’s front entrance, still wide open from the invaders’ entrance.

He didn’t get very far before the Demi-Servant snatched him up again, growling. “I said—”

Gil’s smile flickered angrily and he hissed, “Mongrel.” Then chains slithered around the Demi-Servant’s feet and yanked hard. They almost pulled him off his feet, but he flipped like a cat, his thews bulging as he yanked back.

But it was enough of a distraction for Gil to kick off from the Demi-Servant’s scarred chest. He did his own backflip, called his chains back to him, darted past several mundane soldiers like they were mist, and then he too was out of the fortress and into the forest beyond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For various life reasons I’ll be on an every-two-weeks schedule from here on out, but I think I’ll be consistent. I put it on my calendar! And I’m expecting chapters to be a bit longer—more like this chapter than the last few. Thanks for sticking with me this long and I hope you’ll continue to enjoy the story.


	53. Babes in the Woods

Torches both mystical and mundane blazed through the Summoner’s Castle, brightening every shadow. Despite this, Jekyll drifted through the compound unnoticed, shielded by the Presence Concealment that was Jekyll’s one strength as a Heroic Spirit.

He was on edge, as he’d been on edge since Serendipity vanished: not the _on edge_ of _our fortress has been stolen from us,_ but the _on edge_ of _I,_ I, _we could just kill everything…_ He was Jekyll, but he was also Hyde, and more of Hyde than he wanted to be, even now. Hyde would start cutting his way through the problems. But there were two Demi-Servants around, along with the power that had allowed the invasion to slip around their senses. Releasing Hyde would produce a lot of gore but very few answers, and if the Castle were to be retaken, answers were needed.

_Come on. We can pull answers out of their gut. It’ll be fun._

Jekyll slipped into the main keep behind one of the common soldiers, trying not to listen as Hyde explained exactly where to stab the man so that he’d stay alive but immobilized for hours. Carefully he made his way down to the basement. Two more soldiers were in front of the door that the villagers had barricaded themselves behind, while voices came from the portal chamber.

While keeping an eye on the soldiers at the kitchen door, he eased down the hall to eavesdrop on the portal conversation.

“—done something. But it saves us some trouble if we’re not going to be capping it right away.”

A soldier moved past Jekyll and into the portal room to report on the courtyard situation to a Lord Snow, a new voice, as cool and distant as his name. After Snow dismissed the soldier, he spoke to the original voice, Kokine, as an equal. “I need to talk to Beowulf and Yan Qing. We’ll bring her in once we’ve accounted for all of her old familiars.”

_Ah,_ thought Jekyll, and _ah_ thought Hyde, and the thoughts of the two merged together into one.

* * *

Torches moved through the dark forest beyond the castle walls, slowly coming toward where Jack huddled with Ritsu and the three children in the bushes they’d landed in. She didn’t know what to do. Gil hadn’t come along, and Ritsu kept falling asleep, and Mommy was _gone_ , no matter how Jack tried to call her.

Those torches weren’t a problem. If they got too close, she’d put them out. But there was a lot more than torches moving around the forest. Torches hadn’t been what crept through the courtyard, blinking and fizzing like soap bubbles to Jack’s perceptions. She already knew nobody else could see them quite the way she did, and if she left the babies to go put out some torches, what would happen? Would she come back and more than Ritsu would be hurt? More than Mommy would be gone? She didn’t know. It frightened her and made her head hurt.

“Wake up, Ritsu!” hissed Ichigo, and Ritsu stirred from where she’d been staring at her injured familiar.Jack looked at her hopefully, in case she had some instructions. But the bigger girl just shook her head and then winced, her eyes dull and distant.

Ichigo looked at Jack instead. He was the biggest of Ritsu’s little orphans. He and Kay were too big to be Jack’s baby dolls, but they were fun to play games with. They knew lots: all the rules and all the tricks. But Ichigo didn’t know what to do here. He kept looking at Jack like Jack was Ritsu or Mommy. That scared her too. Her experience at taking care of _anybody_ started and stopped at helping baby Lulu put on a new smock and tying ribbons in her hair.

“Where are we going to sleep, Jack?” whispered Ichigo, patting Lulu’s head as she dozed on his lap. “Pan’s getting tired, too. Are those men with the torches going to find us?”

“No!” said Jack, and stood up, staring hard at the bobbing lights. She couldn’t use her mist because Mommy was gone and those hearts really hadn’t been any better than Merlin had said, way back on her first day. But she could move really fast, and when she used one of her special powers, she was as invisible as the castle’s attackers had been.

But what if somebody came for the others while she was gone? Ritsu had been hurt when Jack had only turned her back for a few minutes!

Better to go fast, then. Jack hopped out of the bush and ran through the forest to the light that had wandered away from the others. It was a whiskered man in quilted armor, calling under his breath, “Hey kiddies, where did you go?”

Jack’s knives flashed. He gasped breathlessly, but the sound of his insides pouring out, wet and beautiful (if missing some important parts), was sloppy and just a little bit squeaky. After that Jack picked up the torch he’d dropped and doused it in the pile of innards next to the twitching body. Then, quick, quick, she ran back to the babies, wiping away the blood that had splashed on her face.

They were all still there! She wanted to cheer, but only Mommy would appreciate that, so she stayed silent like she always used to be.

Ichigo said, “Did you kill him?” and when Jack nodded, he said, “Good.” But Ritsu frowned, and Jack knew that it wasn’t okay that Ichigo had praised her.

“They’ll notice…” said Ritsu, and right at that very moment another torch passed where the dead one was, and started shouting. Ritsu’s brow wrinkled like her head hurt. “They know you’re here now, Jack.”

Dread curled in Jack’s stomach. Had she made a mistake? But what else could she do but kill and dismember?

“I could kill them all?” she suggested. “While you run away. Gil will find you.” This idea made Jack feel the closest to happy she’d been since Mommy left. It was exactly the kind of thing Jack was good at.

“Where do we go?” said Ichigo anxiously. “They want Ritsu. They’ll come to our house again.”

Jack looked at Ritsu hopefully, but Ritsu touched the back of her head and winced. “I… I’m having trouble thinking not-now things.”

The shouting spread from one torch to another, and some of them got closer. Jack shifted back and forth. If she killed more, would that be more mistakes? Maybe if she waited just a little longer, Gil would show up and tell her what to do. Or an idea would occur to Ritsu—

Lulu woke up, looked around, and started crying. Immediately the voices associated with the torches went silent, before starting to call to each other with renewed vigor.

Almost in tears herself, Jack scooped up Lulu and hugged her close, whispering nonsense to her like Mommy did for Jack, until finally Lulu’s sobs became whimpers and she wrapped herself around Jack like a little monkey. “Everybody go that way,” Jack whispered, shifting the toddler’s weight and pointing in the direction with the least lights.

“What about Ritsu?” said Ichigo, balking.

Jack growled at him wordlessly and he growled back. Then Jack remembered Ritsu said they had to keep using words with Ichigo after he got hurt before, so Jack took a deep breath and said, “Help her! You help her walk!”

“Sweeping us up,” muttered Ritsu, struggling to her feet. “They’ll know where we are.”

“Then I’ll kill them!” said Jack. “Protect Ritsu and the kids! That’s my job! Now run!”

Ichigo and Jack both moved easily in the dark forest, but Pan was small and Ritsu was dizzy, and the lights just kept getting closer and closer. There was something else moving around the woods too now. Jack could feel it. She wasn’t sure if it was the enemy’s own version of Information Erasure, or if it was one of those Demi-Servants she didn’t know. But feral wraith that Jack was, she recognized the torches had become the bait and lightless monster the jaws of a trap.

They came across a stream and acting on instinct, Jack made them walk upstream through the water, even though the water was so cold on poor Pan’s bare feet that he started to cry too. Then they clambered out along some smooth rocks and paused to drink, while Jack listened and thought, patting Lulu’s back.

What Ritsu had called the ‘sweep’ hadn’t actually kept up with them. There were still many lights centering on the castle. But shadows moved through the woods, shadows without accompanying lights. And worse, the babies were getting so tired, and Pan didn’t have shoes, and Ritsu needed some kind of doctoring, something better than what Jack could do.

Jack had to find someplace for them to hide and rest. Not the village. Mommy had said the village mostly didn’t like them. The only people who liked them from the village had been in the castle kitchen. And this forest was all wrong. If they were running through a proper city, there’d be a million places to hide. Nobody would ever find them. They could go up, or underneath, or through a maze of buildings.

Jack looked up, but the trees weren’t good for hiding in. And there was no underneath in a forest, as far as she could tell.

“We have to walk more,” decided Jack.

Pan started crying. Quiet sobs, not like Lulu’s, but deep ones, where his eyes squeezed closed and the pain creaked out of him. Jack stared at him in horror, before looking at Ichigo and Ritsu. But Ritsu was barely standing, with Ichigo was entirely focused on her. Yet there was _no way_ Jack could hold both Lulu and Pan, not in the comfy cozy way babies liked to be held. Gil could just barely do it but Jack just wasn’t big enough.

“Pan,” hissed Ichigo. “Shut up! Jack—” The older boy gave Jack a desperate look, at which point Ritsu started throwing up. Her gagging echoed off the surrounding trees, and Ichigo threw his arms around her to keep her from falling over entirely.

Jack looked around wildly. Lulu was whimpering now too, but the shadows that tried to hide in Jack’s blind spot moved nearby. They’d been found, and it was just a matter of the bad thing moving in. “What do I do?” muttered Jack. “Mommy, what do I do? What do I do?”

She remembered Mommy stroking her hair, telling her she deserved a hug. Promising to fight for her. Such a silly Mommy. It was Jack’s job to fight for Mommy.

But fighting here wouldn’t work, so Jack had to be the Mommy instead. She had to take care of the babies and Ritsu the way Mommy took care of her.

Then Jack had an idea.

“We’re not here,” she announced, and then dragged Pan by the hand over to where Ritsu knelt. “Shh, shh. It’s okay, Ritsu.” Jack patted Ritsu’s hair. “It’s okay, Pan. I’m going to do a magic trick, okay? We’re all going to go away. Shh, shh.” She patted Pan’s hair, and kissed Lulu’s cheek, trying her best to make them all be quiet. If they could all be quiet, all together, Jack would make them disappear. She’d never made anybody else disappear before, but if the babies were hers like she was Mommy’s, surely they’d disappear when Jack did?

The mind trick, blind trick, behind the mirror trick, moved closer. But it was okay. It didn’t matter how close it got, as long as Pan stopped crying and Lulu didn’t start. She patted his head more, whispering to him, singing a nonsense song about tricks in the dark. And as soon as his sobs stopped….

…she held them all close, and erased them.

The world shifted around Jack dizzily, in a way she’d never seen or felt before. She was in darkness, in a forest, and in an empty space where black silhouettes of men with torches froze in confusion. The blackness of the silhouettes radiated out from little pendants around their necks, Jack noticed, and remembered. Their mind trick, blind trick, behind the mirror trick wasn’t actually theirs at all, and because of that, she could see them even when they couldn’t see her.

Then Ritsu started throwing up again, and the empty space began to crack apart around them. Jack whimpered and tried to peel Lulu off her, because even if dismembering was a mistake, it was better than letting Ritsu hurt more.

_Hey, big sister, thanks for being so patient…_

Golden portals hummed open, blades flashed, and four corpses with magic torches and shattered black vials as pendants collapsed in a scattered pattern near Jack and the kids. Her heart pounding, she looked up.

Above them, perched on a branch that seemed far too precarious, grinning as he kicked his feet, was Gil.

* * *

Many miles away, on a recently blasted hillside in a pine forest overlooking a once-thriving mining town, Cú Chulainn slid a corpse off Gae Bolg. It had been a decent little fight, but the Lancer was in no mood to appreciate such pleasures. He’d followed the lines of communication from Lord Kirri’s HQ after Lord Kirri had killed one of his brethren, which had led him here, to another of Queen Mada’s knights. The knight had given him a bit of exercise, but nothing about Lady Serendipity’s location. In the end, Cú had been convinced that the knight had nothing to share, which is why he was a corpse rather than screaming.

“What a mess,” said a voice, and Cú whirled around, weapon raised. He didn’t lower it when he recognized Merlin, standing high on the branch of a fallen tree.

“ _You_. Have you found her?” Cú asked, but he knew Merlin hadn’t. If Serendipity was free and healthy, she would have contacted him herself.

“It’s only a matter of time,” said Merlin cheerfully. “Meanwhile, I see you’re keeping busy. Did he knock down the forest?” He nodded at the corpse.

Rolling his shoulders, Cú glanced around at the local devastation. “Yeah. I was a little surprised when he did it down in the town the first time.”

“Ah,” said Merlin, studying the damage. “I wonder why they’re bothering with Demi-Servants if some of them can do damage of this caliber on their own.” His focus snapped back to Cú. “But good work! One less enemy for Ren when I find her.” He tilted his head. “I suppose that must have used up most of your magical energy?”

“Nah,” said Cú, a grin cracking across his face. “I’ve got enough for the hunting I’ll be doing.”

“Hmm,” Merlin said. “Be careful, Hound. Without Serendipity, there’s no refresh coming.”

A spasm of rage made Cú’s fist tighten on his spear. “You think I don’t know that?” She’d brushed his hair the night before she’d vanished, and he’d held her in his arms as she’d fallen asleep. He’d left her after an hour to do some work on the walls, and sometime between then and dawn, she’d simply vanished. Meanwhile Merlin, still in disgrace, hadn’t even been present: not when she vanished, and not when they’d discovered her empty bed. “It doesn’t matter. I have what I’ll need.”

Distantly Merlin said, “Yes, I suppose she topped you off before they stole her out from under you.”

Cú’s muscles surged and Gae Bolg ripped through the air toward Merlin, moving as a red blur. For an instant, the Magus’s eyes widened. But that was all the satisfaction Cú got, because a half-heartbeat later, the spear passed through only an expanding cloud of dark purple flowers as Merlin retreated from the field.

A moment later, the red spear reappeared in Cú’s hand. He hung around a few moments in case Merlin wanted to give him another free shot. But finally he shrugged, stretched, and went hunting for his next target.


	54. Sabers in the Woods

Diarmuid did his best to shelter Artoria and the child from the branches he crashed through as he landed from his mighty leap into the woods. When, as soon as he balanced on the ground, Artoria pushed him away, he decided that meant a job well done. He watched in distant wonder as she set Kay on the ground and gave the child a brusque patdown to check for injuries.

His memories of the Saber from previous encounters were vague and dreamlike, and the one he remembered wore blue rather than black—but he remembered her all the same. Seeing her move gave him a thrill of joy. It was like he’d felt when he had a chance to spar with the Child of Light—except Cú Chulainn had been a cultural hero, and the Saber Artoria was something far more personal.

“What are you staring at?” she demanded sharply. “Are you just going to stand there gape-jawed? I’ll look after the child. You retake the castle.”

Diarmuid pulled himself away from admiring her firmness of purpose and bowed, murmuring, “As you command,” a second time before dematerializing.

Artoria! She’d been with him all along. He remembered sparring with Tora and wondered if Artoria had observed from inside. Had she appreciated his swordwork?

Did she remember him at all?

Well, what mattered was that he remembered her, remembered her smile and their duels, interrupted by betrayal and blood. He prayed such an end wouldn’t happen yet again and turned his attention to the task at hand.

He moved high over the castle, keeping most of his senses focused on detecting the near presence of other Servants. They could all move very quickly while dematerialized, but it was their material bodies that protected their spirit core. If that blond, scarred Servant caught him unaware like this, there would be no duels, only failure.

From above, he studied the movement of the soldiers around the main keep. The blond Servant stalked around occasionally bellowing but never looking up. A Berserker, Diarmuid suspected: all brute force, zero finesse, and even less perception. If Diarmuid could control the start of the battle, he’d win.

Unfortunately, the Berserker wasnt the only unfamiliar Servant present, something Diarmuid realized almost too late. A figure appeared on the keep roof, crouching, with long dark hair and tattoos on his chest. The new Servant—an Assassin judging from how he’d been veiled from Diarmuid’s senses—was looking directly at him.

Without hesitation, Diarmuid rematerialized mid-leap, landing on the roof with his swords at the ready. But rather than attacking, the other Servant gave him a friendly little wave as he stood up. “Hey there.”

Diarmuid dipped his head in a cautious acknowledgement.

“Oh, we can fight if you really want to,” observed the other. “But I don’t think that would be very fair to you.”

Snorting, Diarmuid said, “You invaded our fortress by trickery and stealth. I don’t believe _fair_ is a motivating concern for you.”

“Well, that’s true. But that wasn’t _my_ plan. I’m not into relying on other people’s tricks. Besides it’s embarassing to win by ganging up on somebody. Beowulf doesn’t care about that, though, and he’ll be here in a heartbeat if—well, as I said, it wouldn’t be fair.”

With a scowl, Diarmuid said, “Fair or not, I can’t allow you to just take our castle.”

“We already did,” said the other, almost gently. “But I see how it is. Acting under orders? But not from your girl Master, I think.” He moved as Diarmuid did, keeping the distance between them. “That other girl, I think? The one I saw you carrying away? I saw where you landed, too…”

Diarmuid didn’t respond, watching the other’s lazy grace as he stepped around the roof. The other really didn’t plan on fighting, he decided. The distance he maintained was meaningless to Diarmuid, but he’d be able to rouse his allies before being dispatched—and Diarmuid wasn’t at all certain he could dispatch him quickly.

Then Diarmuid realized what the other had said. He narrowed his eyes. “What do you know about my Master?”

“She’s a pretty little thing. But very scared last time I saw her.” The Assassin stretched, locking his fingers together over his head.

“Where is she?” Diarmuid asked through clenched teeth.

“Can’t tell you that. But I know if you found her, you’d be able to evict us, too.”

“Why—who are you, anyhow? Why are you telling me this?”

The Assassin pressed his palm to his chest. “Me? I’m Yan Qing. And I’m not telling you anything. I’m just trying to convince you to get out of here without exerting myself, you know? Why waste energy on a fight I’m not going to enjoy.” He shaded his eyes, looking out over the forest. “So what’s up with this other girl you ran off with? Important to you, is she? Maybe I ought to go after her.”

“Tch,” said Diarmuid and gave up on the conversation as a waste of time. He dematerialized again and returned to scouting the castle, noting the number of men and trying and failing to identify the figures he’d fought before.

Had Yan Qing been one of them, veiled by an invisibility not his own? After comparing the Assassin’s movement, he decided it was plausible. But that raised another concern. He hadn’t been worried about Yan Qing’s comment about chasing down Artoria and Kay—but he’d been thinking of an ordinary Assassin’s capacities. Now that he gave it some thought, Artoria in her current dark form might not have the means to avoid him.

Cursing to himself, he rose out of the castle again. Yan Qing had once again vanished, which was enough to send Diarmuid back into the forest. But as he moved over the trees, he realized he’d somehow lost track of the castle…

Somehow. Hah.

_Damn_. Whatever had been used to hide the invasion was now being applied to the castle itself. He stilled, trying to decide between seeing if he could re-enter the castle’s airspace again by retracing his path, and returning to Artoria. It was a painful decision. Either way he was going to be giving something up.

After hesitating longer than he wanted to ever admit, he shot through the forest until he came to where he’d left Artoria. She wasn’t there, but she’d left a subtle trail for him to follow. He found her a short distance away, inspecting a climbable fallen tree with Kay, her sword held casually at her side.

“I could hide up here?” Kay suggested.

Diarmuid materialized, saying, “We have more problems.”

Artoria gave him an irritated look. “The only reason for you to be back already is to report a failure. Don’t waste my time with set up, report.”

Wincing internally, Diarmuid said, “The castle’s been stealthed. I’m not sure I can get back to it. I think they have Serendipity somewhere nearby, though.”

Artoria’s mailed fist clenched and cold anger flashed on her face. For a moment, Diarmuid thought she was about to hit him.

Then her form fuzzed and Tora took her place, blinking in confusion as she staggered against Kay. The little girl caught her arm worriedly. “Are you all right?”

“What… what happened?” asked Tora. “I know about the castle being stolen, but just now… I… she stepped back voluntarily. Why?”

Diarmuid’s shoulders loosened. “We need to make a plan. I may be able to get back to the castle despite the stealth, but doing so alone would… not serve Lady Serendipity.”

Tora looked around. “Where are the other Servants?”

“Would you like me to search for them first?” Diarmuid knew Tora wasn’t his Master, just like he knew she wasn’t Artoria. But she did have some command experience, and the Saber really preferred to execute others’ plans rather than make them on his own.

Scratching her head, Tora looked around again and then down at Kay. “Where are the other kids? Where’s Ritsu? My Servant doesn’t know.” Panic edged her voice, which neatly put all of Diarmuid’s other priorities in order. Suddenly he once again felt calm.

“We’ll find them, and the other Servants. Then we’ll lure that chatty Assassin out and make him tell us what he knows about Serendipity.” It was a plan. Having a plan was always better than not, after all.


	55. The Dark Way

Jekyll perched on the swing Merlin had conjured in the castle courtyard, his arms around his knees, silent and unseen in the deepest part of the night. The castle had settled into something resembling a routine over the past few hours as soldiers divided into shifts so the ones not on patrol in the forest or attending to integral castle-conquering-tasks could rest.

Serendipity’s Servants had done so much to fortify the castle again, and it all had been meaningless. But Jekyll couldn’t worry about that now.

The Assassin was waiting. He was certain they’d be bringing his kidnapped Master into the castle eventually, and when they did—

_Finders keepers_ , whispered Hyde, with a crimson thought cast toward Merlin.

Jekyll disagreed with Hyde there, as he did on almost everything. In fact, the only thing they agreed on right now was the necessity of rescuing Serendipity as soon as possible. _After_ the rescue, Hyde had his dream reward all planned out, in exhaustive and uncomfortable detail. Jekyll, on the other hand… well, he didn’t know. His feelings toward his summoner could best be described as _complicated._

She’d empowered Hyde by her naming of him. Jekyll was used to controlling the transition. Sometimes he even needed an alchemical concoction to trigger it. But with Serendipity, Hyde could come out almost at will. It took all of Jekyll’s strength to hold him back, and he disliked that enormously. He’d always believed fundamentally in the triumph of virtue over vice. That was the way the world was supposed to work, and why Hyde existed in the first place: as a part of him he could bind and lock away. What did it say that she flipped that relationship upside down?

And yet he craved her too, as much as Hyde did. He knew part of it was simply the summoning magic—but when he’d woken from that cursed dream to find Serendipity in his arms, clinging to him, her breasts pressed against his chest through their disarrayed clothing, and his hand dipping between her legs—

Jekyll dropped his head into his hands, his breath quickening. He’d almost kept going. He’d _wanted_ to keep going. But he’d indubitably been Jekyll.

_I wish you had,_ grumbled Hyde. _Better you than him. At least if it’d been you I could enjoy the memories._

“Shut up,” muttered Jekyll, and his other half obliged him, allowing him to contemplate Serendipity in silence. He _had_ to save her. She was his Master; it was unthinkable that he wouldn’t. And… he appreciated both her persistence and her patience. She trusted him, even as he held a distance between them. She’d never _tried_ to evoke Hyde—although really why would she when Hyde took control at the slightest hint of her need?

_That’s right_ , said Hyde smugly. _She likes me. She told me I was hers_.

“And you’d still destroy her eventually.” Jekyll’s words were subvocalized rather than spoken.

_Hah!_ said Hyde, which did nothing at all to dispute the fact that the Berserker had set up a scenario to return Jekyll to the front for precisely that reason. But he went on, _Yeah, you can think that but you felt her skin too. Her heat. She wanted us so bad._

“You’d hurt her,” whispered Jekyll, remembering how in another life he’d woken over and over to bloody hands.

_If I wasn’t here, you’d be the one hurting her_ , pointed out the other. _Gah,_ _why are goody-two-shoes so pathetically indecisive?_ Jekyll’s body twitched, but he clenched his fists and kept control.

“It’s not time yet,” he hissed to himself.

But only a moment later, there came the clattering of yet another wagon beyond the gate of the castle. It was, Jekyll saw, a covered wagon. Perfect for transporting kidnapped young women in. But the way the weight was distributed on the axels gave him pause.

He stood up, balancing lightly on the beam at the top of the wooden swing, staring hard.

_What are you waiting for? Let’s go!_

“Something’s wrong…” Jekyll slipped to the ground and prowled over to the slowly moving wagon. A breeze lifted his hair with a passing shadow in the night and he looked up sharply. He could just pick up the spirit origin of the Servant secretly passing by. A Servant…. and his Master.

His breath hissed between his teeth as his spine arched and Hyde reached toward the sky. Jekyll staggered away, nearly running into an oblivious human soldier. Silently he told his other self, “No, no, _no,_ you fool! It’s too late to chase, and too dangerous, too. We need to wait.”

_Leave her to them even longer? Why the fuck did I bring you back again?_ And once again Hyde tried to seize control.

“Wait! We’ll wait until they leave her alone, and then free her and take her away. That way there’s no risk to her, Hyde!”

He could feel Hyde’s phantasmal fingers around his throat and his stream of rhetoric quickened as he desperately tried to maintain the Presence Concealment that hid them. “They’re keeping her for some reason, but if they realize they’re going to lose her, they could slit her throat—”

_We slit theirs first. Easy._

“ _Not_ easy! There’s two Servants here and those Knights or whatever, too. We still don’t know enough about our enemy, Hyde!”

The phantasmal fingers loosened, and Jekyll rushed on. “Let’s go find where they’ve taken her. Slowly. Carefully. They’ve kept her this long, they’re not going to kill her now unless we give them a reason.”

Slowly, Hyde allowed Jekyll full control of their body again, and Jekyll crept toward the keep andwithin. The inside was notably more active than the outside, with several small groups of men conferring in the great hall and moving up and down the stairs. Magical lights floated along the walls, more than Serendipity’s army ever bothered with. Jekyll had to be far more careful and conscious of his own magics while stealthing under them, because Hyde made his shadow sometimes visible even when he was not.

It took him too long to finish looking around the Hall and prowling through the upper floors, seeking any sign of Serendipity. By the time he made it to the basement, Hyde’s constant attempt to break free felt like the fingers of dozens of dolls scratching all over his skin.

“Well, that didn’t work. We’ll try again later,” said a voice.

Two guards stood at the ends of the hall, while two more men in the same drab, functional outfits but with an obvious air of command emerged from the portal room. Lord Snow, the commander, and his colleague Kokine, his… aide? Family member? Jekyll didn’t know, except there was a familiar tension between them he’d wondered if he could exploit.

Two scents Hyde knew very well wafted with them.

But instead of smelling them, Jekyll concentrated harder on the commander and his aide, running through all he’d managed to learn about their strengths and weaknesses.

“We’ll have to give her a reason to wish for a savior,” said Kokine as they moved toward the stairs and the stealthed Jekyll.

They were the wrong scents for Hyde to smell together.

His nostrils flared, and two familiar scents painted pictures in his mind.

Serendipity.

And blood.

It took psychic endurance Jekyll hadn’t known he had to slide past the commander rather than letting Hyde do what _he_ wanted to do. But he managed to maintain his persona integrity and his presence concealment until he flung himself into the portal room. There, what he saw knocked him down into the darkness and loosed Hyde on the world.

But Hyde froze, staring with wide eyes.

Serendipity’s skin was so soft. He’d always appreciated how soft it was. He liked the tiny hairs that lifted under his breath and fell away at the stroke of a blade.

Yes, her skin was soft, pliant and warm, exactly the opposite of his knives. Hyde had dedicated significant thought to what would happen to his Master if he stroked his cold, hard, sharp knife along her skin. Not the restrained way she let the magus do, tiny nicks that barely bled, but long slices that let every inch of his blade taste her blood.

He’d thought a _lot_ about it. But Hyde knew from experience that doing that to Master would end his fun before he was anywhere near done. So he didn’t do it. He stroked her skin, oh yes, but with his fingers and his nails and his tongue. It helped that he _liked_ Serendipity.He’d licked along her pulse and tasted an edge he wasn’t sure he wanted to cross.

Not yet.

Not yet, not yet, NOT YET AND NOW SOMEBODY HAD GOTTEN TO HER FIRST!

A blanket underneath her, Serendipity slumped unconscious against the wall where Ritsu had once slept. Blood trickled down the back of her left arm from a slanting cut in her soft skin. She was still wearing the remains of the nightwear Merlin had made her, although it had been torn in places that let tantalizing glimpses of skin through.

Hyde lunged toward her and then pulled himself back violently when he was within a handspan of grabbing her up. His breath hissed through his teeth and he tilted his head sharply to one side as he inspected the woman. Was she injured elsewhere? He couldn’t tell just from looking. It mattered a lot.

Gnawing on one knuckle, he settled onto his heels to watch her and wait. He needed Jekyll to climb back up from the pit where he’d been flung by Hyde’s seizure of the front. Because if Hyde wanted to cut Serendipity on his own, he needed two things. The first was to get her away from here, away from everybody who might _interfere_ , and the second was for her to still be alive and capable of thought.

His good half couldn’t handle any of that, but just a little of Jekyll was all Hyde needed to be much more effective. As soon as the doctor started to recover a shadow of awareness, Hyde reached down into his persona and dragged up the medical knowledge he needed to inspect her and the bleeding heart he needed to put off cutting Serendipity until later. Then he knelt next to his Master and put his hands all over her.

_Jekyll tried frantically to limit Hyde, not for Serendipity’s sake, but for his own. But Hyde was sliding past the edge of self-control while utterly convinced each even more questionable idea was better than the previous one. Soon there’d be no pulling him back, and when he got Serendipity away from these threats—_

Hyde ran his fingers over Serendipity’s legs and hips, tracing the curve of her ass as he pulled her forward. She flopped limply toward him in that way he hated. Impatiently, he shook her a little to wake her up. It had no effect, so he leaned her against hir shoulder to check her head for injuries. No… he didn’t think she was unconscious due to wounds. Magic. Fucking magic.

He licked her ear experimentally, and then looked closely at the cut on her arm. The crimson blood still welled slowly from the thin slice. Whoever had marked her had a very sharp knife. His tongue flicked out and the iron taste of her blood exploded in his mouth. Magical energy surged through him, tingling through his limbs.

Hunger swept over him. Then he was kissing her mouth, pushing apart her lips and licking within, starving for her taste. She made a little sound, shifting her weight. He stroked her hair, squeezed her breast—

_Jekyll did everything he could to invoke the Mystic Code Merlin had given Hyde when he’d returned. But he just wasn’t strong enough to fight past the tide of Hyde’s emotions. Even from his backseat view, Serendipity felt too good. He_ needed _her. How could he stop?_

_But he had to. He had to. He had to. This was wrong, and worse than wrong._

_Stopstopstop…_

_Not here!_

That got through to Hyde. Reluctantly, he let Serendipity go, lowering her to the blanket. He’d have to kill some people first before he could get his Master away to someplace where he could indulge himself. As he rose to his feet, he stretched. With the taste of her blood buzzing through him, even more empowering than her mouth, it would be easy. He’d be unstoppable.

He loped to the portal room entrance, darted down the hall and drew his knife across the throat of one of the guards so hard it nearly decapitated him. Blood sprayed over Hyde but he didn’t bother appreciating the beatiful crimson arc. Instead he dashed to the other guard at the stairs and sliced that one at the throat and then the gut.

Pleasure surged through him at the glimpse of organs through sliced leather armor and flesh, and he swallowed hard. Then he bolted upstairs to finish clearing a path. There were Servants somewhere, but he’d be fine. He’d win. And then he’d take Serendipity away… take her away and do everything he’d dreamt with her. _To_ her.

_Jekyll watched, helpless and appalled, as Hyde cut his way through soldiers. The sight of Serendipity bleeding had been far, far too much for him. Even now, the sight and taste of her blood dominated his thoughts. He killed with an absent-minded ease while remaining fixated on that awful, horrible, beautiful moment._

He’d tasted the salt of tears on her face when he’d licked her, but she hadn’t screamed when they cut her. He would have heard that. She was so brave. But Hyde really, really wanted to make her scream. He had all sorts of ideas. Even if she was brave, some of them would work.

_No._

_No, Jekyll couldn’t bear it! He couldn’t watch Hyde do that. He couldn’t let Hyde_ win _. So he threw himself over and over again at the steel will keeping him down._

Blood slicked Hyde’s hands and soaked into his shirt. Two ghosts moved around him, but it didn’t matter what they did to his senses. He was faster, so much faster than they were. She was waiting for him downstairs. She’d promised him he could have exactly what he wanted.

_She didn’t! I know she didn’t promise this—_

God, Jekyll was annoying, especially since Hyde _knew_ Jekyll only wanted her for himself. He’d get her away and then show Jekyll everything he pretended not to want to see.

Hyde spun and slashed. The Great Hall was full of the ghosts and the dead, but the ghosts were a handicap to extracting his Master. He snickered as he realized they thought they’d trapped him. They thought they’d lured him in, but they’d given him her blood, her mouth, her body: everything he needed to overcome monsters far worse than this—

_No! Please, we must stop—_

Something heavy and empty at the same time tried to enfold Hyde, but he sidestepped, grinning. They wanted to catch him in their own magic, but he was untouchable—

A small, wretched, groggy voice whispered in his mind, _Hyde?_

Serendipity called for him, and this time, instead of empowering the fiend Hyde, it froze him. Her tiny voice brought back her fingers, pushing away his face, and her arms around his chest. For the first time, the particular madness triggered by her wounds flickered.

Jekyll, trying too hard to regain control to pay attention to anything else, lurched forward, knocking the paralyzed Hyde aside. He stood, blinking in the brightness of the Great Hall as two absences moved around him.

Something heavy and empty at the same time slammed into him, and took away the world.

.

.

.

It was only some time later that Jekyll realized what surrounded him was… _nothing_. They were in a cage where they couldn’t see the walls, and Jekyll could barely imagine the idea of escape. But it took a while before he realized the truth because first he had to deal with Hyde, who was very, _very_ angry indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, wonderful patient readers!
> 
> This is a week later than it was meant to be, because I spent too much of the last week with my nose pressed to the window on current events (and for posterity's sake I explain this means the coronavirus pandemic unfolding). But now I am housebound for weeks and I fully intend to spend it writing amusing distractions for people in need of them.
> 
> To that end:   
> I am on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/chrysoula)! Feel free to follow me and talk to me about Fate or fanfiction or whatever. I find I'm craving that kind of thing already. It's impressive how social distancing can make even an introvert like me want to reach out! I'm also thinking of reactivating a long disused Tumblr account...? Hm...
> 
> Anyhow, I love hearing from readers, even if it's incoherent, and reader thoughts can really inspire and motivate me. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	56. Goats and Dream Kings

Aya, a goatherd of Silky Farm in the region of Dashi, often felt she’d been born just a little too late. Her home had bowed their heads and surrendered their Summoner’s Castle to the Sovereigns when she was still a small child, and now life was so, _so_ dull. The elders would tell scary bedtime stories of how, before the Sovereigns started their campaign, the sky had thronged with summoned winged monsters who would swoop down to steal away misbehaving children!

Young Aya thought that sounded _wonderful_ and spent many hours imagining where they’d steal her away to. Her austere mother hadn’t appreciated it when, at age 8, she’d shouted, “Aya! Do you want to get stolen away by sky demons?” and Aya had shouted back, “I’m _trying_ to, Mama!”

8-year-old Aya met the proposal that sky demons would only want to gobble her up with implacable skepticism. She pointed out that any hungry sky demon who could tell if she was good or bad would also obviously be able to tell just how much more fun it would be to pick her up and take her on an adventure.

This proved so powerful a defense that not only did she get out of trouble, but her previously stern mother took her on a picnic to a circus and (much to Aya’s chagrin) _completely forgot to sell her_.

That became the pattern of her life. Unlike most people, Aya lived in a world where those things could happen. And so, for Aya, they did… although in ways she never quite acknowledged. She was so busy looking up, she usually missed the miracles under her nose.

By the time she was fifteen, she’d had the most relentlessly mundane life of adventure imaginable. Opportunities that challenged her were rare.

“Hey!” said the little blue men. “Can you spin these moonbeams into thread for us?” She’d been spinning since she was three.

“Oh!” said the talking mole. “Can you churn this serpent’s milk to butter?” And oh, she knew churning.

“Aya!” commanded the goblin queen. “Stalk this nightwraith across the moors on a starless night!” _Child’s play_ compared to finding a black goat in a rainstorm on a scrubby mountain.

Just the other day, she’d watched a flying beast bearing two people soar over the occupied Summoner’s Castle, laughing. It hadn’t been in the livery of the Sovereigns, either—but nobody else had seemed to notice them, even when they swooped close to the walls and talked so loudly Aya could hear fragments of words from her mountainside.

 _“_ Miss! _”_ said a _sorcerer in white._ “ _My, you_ are _a big dreamer_ , in a pleasant voice that cut across Aya’s imaginary world.

“Hey!” said Aya, although she didn’t quite wake up even when she shook her head wildly. The tiny presence buzzing in her head was not dislodged, though.

 _“Shh, shh_ ,” whispered the presence. _“Your big dreams are going to be great! I can really do a lot with these. That is, if you’ll let me? …It might be a little bit dangerous.”_

Aya brightened up. It was true, she’d spent at least as much time dreaming as churning butter, so was probably likewise good at it. But she’d never had a chance to be judged by a real pro, not the same way Inori down the road had certified her butter.

Without a second thought, she blurted, “Yes, of course I’ll help you!” She beamed as the presence in her dreams smiled.

That was how Aya of Silky Farm began to sleepwalk through life.

***

Aya was hunting a monster through the deep jungle. It was hot, sweaty work, and there were many moments when she wondered if she was the prey instead. Her blood sizzled with the hot lure of death potentially lurking around every tree. Birds chattered around her, occasonally falling ominously silent. The giant flowers hanging from the trees seemed to whisper in their own language, while in the sky overhead, two presences, one light, one dark, spoke as if completely unaware of her hunt.

“Was this _really_ necessary, magus?” asked the darkness, who was also known as the Count. “I’m not fond of using children in the schemes of men.”

 _“_ Oh yes, definitely,” said the light, who was the magus, and also Merlin. “That so-called witch queen is looking for me now. She found me when I was poking around some of her spell constructs and my goodness, she was nasty!”

In the sky, the clouds formed pictures. A tall, beautiful woman confronted the image of the light, waving a hand imperiously. Storm spilled out of her palm and encircled the pair of presences before a wind from the light blew away the image.

“And thus you ran away,” said the darkness sardonically. “Into a child’s dreams.”

Aya hissed under her breath, but didn’t look up at the figures hovering overhead. She’d found a new trail. This one led up into one of the oversized jungle trees. They were hard to climb alone, but luckily, there were many convenient vines. She wrapped two of them around her fists and began to scramble up the tall, thick trunk.

“Hey!” said the light. “I needed a workshop anyhow, and it’s not like I didn’t ask permission first.”

“Your idea of asking permission— No. Nevermind. I recall we’re allies here. I suppose I should ask you once again what exactly your goals are, magus. Are you not supposed to be finding your mistress while I deal with the enemy? Why did you reveal yourself to them?”

“I told you, _she_ found _me_.” The light didn’t sound overly worried by this. “Don’t scoff at her magic, Count—”

Dryly, the darkness said, “It’s not her magic that worries. Attractive, is she?”

The light hesitated before answering. “That’s completely irrelevant. I’m not looking for a date, Count.”

The branches of the canopy tree started about halfway up, and Aya threw herself onto one of them and then chinned herself up until she could swing her legs over. Then she crouched on the branch, as wide as a broad fence beam, and looked around for her prey.

The darkness said, “I suppose I can believe that. Your heart—” But when the light hissed much like Aya had, the darkness changed its statement. “Why do you need a workshop, though?”

After a moment of silence, the light said, “She is hidden somewhere. By something. There’s no other explanation. Finding her will require breaking the enemy’s defense. I think I know who can do it. I just have to teach that person how.”

Aya scrambled higher in the tree, having gotten a better bead on her target. The undergrowth rippled below as something moved by, close to the ground. Though she couldn’t see it, she could tell it was very large.

Skeptically, the darkness said, “You’re just going to sit somewhere safe, putting others in harm’s way, while you train somebody else to defeat your enemies?”

“Well, I mean it’s worked before,” pointed out the light. “Some battles can only be won by those who have something to lose.”

“Yes,” said the darkness, very slowly. “You are a fool, magus.”

“I do my best!”

With an irritated sigh, the darkness said, “This is why I prefer _not_ to work with you. If I didn’t owe your mistress some kind of service—well, nevermind that. But surely you could have built your workshop somewhere else? Some other individual’s dreams? Surely an infant, or a dreaming elder, would be far safer than an adolescent with chores and expectations?”

“Don’t you worry about that,” said the light. “She’s doing just fine. The poor thing, nobody expects much of her.”

Aya edged out along a thin branch, concentrating hard on keeping herself stable.

“In fact,” went on the light, “it’s crucial I use somebody like her. I’ll be bringing my trainee here and to really unlock her latent potential, I’m going to need somebody with a big imagination—”

With a mighty leap, Aya threw herself into the air, reaching out with her whole body, stretching out her fingers. She would make it! She knew she would, even if only by the skin of her teeth!

Her fingers brushed something solid and she twisted like a cat to give herself that extra bit of momentum. Then she hung from Merlin’s boot, grinning fiercely. “Caught you!”

“—just like this girl.” Merlin peered down at the teenage girl dangling from his foot. “Er. Hello, Aya. I was having a meeting—?”

Aya swung herself back and forth and then grabbed his ankle with one hand. “I could climb you just like that tree,” she told him smugly. Then she eyed the darkness. This close she could make out the hat and the burning eyes under the shadowy cloak. “Who are you?”

He grinned at her toothily. “I’m the King of Nightmares, Aya. Maybe you should go back to where it’s safe.”

After squinting at him for a moment, Aya began to swing herself back and forth. Then once again she threw herself into the air, aiming herself at the so-called King of Nightmares. It was obvious to anyone that she’d fall short. With a muttered curse, the Count stepped toward her flight and caught her hand in his.

She beamed at him as she came to a graceful landing on the air beside him. “I knew you’d do that!” The Count met her gaze impassively, but he continued holding her hand were white-knuckled. If she noticed _that_ , she gave no sign. Instead she turned her attention to Merlin. “Hey, you said we were going to do something really exciting, like overthrow the Sovereigns. This monster-hunting is just busywork, isn’t it?” Swinging the Count’s hand like she was on a stroll with a suitor, she said, “I need more!”

Merlin grinned back, and the Count couldn’t tell if he was amused by Aya, or by the Count’s predicament. “How about learning to turn yourself invisible?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ren will be back with us soon... I hope. I miss her.
> 
> This week was a little harder than expected, but nobody in my household is sick and part of it is still employed and I'm gonna take that as a win. I hope you enjoyed meeting Aya. I think she's a little more than either 'dream king' bargained for.
> 
> Update: I made a Discord. [This](https://discord.gg/qey3vdW) is an invite link. Please feel free to join me if you'd like to chat with me or other readers, or learn more about my work, or even just talk about FGO.


	57. Bloodsong part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ren has been kidnapped. The Summoner's Castle has been conquered by enemies hidden by a magic that annihilates sensory input. The Servants, scattered, find their own ways to regroup.

i. Cú Chulainn

Afternoon sunlight flooded through silvered stormclouds, casting each flagstone of the shattered courtyard in sharp relief as Cú Chulainn watched yet another man die. This one had a broken shield still bound to his arm, and he supported his bulk with the greatsword driven into the earth as he gasped for breath. Blood streamed from numerous wounds where Cú had struck around his shield, but the worst wound, the one that had split his sternum, had gone directly through the shield. Cú had been bored by then.

This one had been so eager to fight, too. He hadn’t even bothered giving Cú his name first. Perhaps he’d assumed Cú had already known it. He’d had that kind of arrogance.

In a way, he still did. Even as he died, he spat at Cú. “You fool! My queen will know I’ve fallen. I have a dozen brothers waiting to take my place!”

With a cold grin, Cú said, “Do you still? I’ve killed five of your so-called brothers already.”

The knight’s eyes flashed and Cú watched in mild interest as he surged forward a step. “You are but one man and we are many. You will never reach her.”

Cú whirled, kicking the remains of the man’s shield away from him. Then he knocked him down with an agonizing kick to the chest. “Oh, die already.”

But even sprawled on the ground, the knight, his eyes blazing with hate, seemed determined to draw out his own suffering as long as possible. He had no hope of rescue or reinforcements; his only motivation was pure spite. It was the kind of defiance Cú could respect, even honor, so he leaned on Gae Bolg to wait however long it took.

“Where did you come from?” the knight whispered. “Who… who do you fight for?”

Cú slitted his eyes, for a moment seeing himself from the knight’s perspective. A hero appearing from nowhere, cutting his way through an elite corps of warriors. It seemed like something out of a fairy tale. But such stories didn’t touch the core of Cú’s _rage_ that his Master had been stolen away.

“I fight for my lady,” he told the other. “I came from her wish.”

This seemed like answer enough for the dying knight. He closed his eyes, breathing shallowly. Then, opening them again, he said, wisfully, “Does she praise you?”

Memories washed over Cú: the warmth of her mouth against his, and the softness of her body nestled in his arms. Although she’d been comfortable leaning on him, letting him hold her, he’d only tasted her once since she sent the magus of flowers away, on a quiet evening a few days before she’d been snatched away. She’d come to him, desperate for distraction from her thoughts, knowing he was the only one she could rely on to take only what he was given, and give her exactly what she wanted.

He’d almost laughed at the time. He, Cú Chulainn, was the _safe_ one. But he’d welcomed her, too. There had been praise a plenty in her little moans as he kissed and touched her. And while he hungered for more of her body, it was nothing compared to his drive to bring her complete and total victory. He wished for nothing more than to return to her when she called and place in her arms all the crowns of this dying world.

“She trusts me,” he said softly. “That’s all the praise I need.”

The knight nodded painfully. “That is why you won, then.” He closed his eyes again, breathing slowly.

Cú chose not to disturb the man’s last moments by dispelling his illusions. The truth was that the knight never even had a chance. Cú hadn’t even needed his Noble Phantasm. His opponent may have been imbued with the supernatural strength of an oak tree, but ultimately he’d been only human, just like his brothers.

As the knight’s breath became more labored, Cú’s thoughts returned to his Master. She considered him the _safe_ one, but at least his rivals were an incubus and a psychopath. But was _rivals_ even the right word? He didn’t want her heart, just to make her queen of the world and also to have her gasping his name. Hyde didn’t even want that much, while the Magus of Flowers wanted… something else. Something that made him smile like a clown when she chastized him, something mad and blind and dangerous.

Merlin would find her, though. Cú wasn’t even bothering to investigate her disappearance anymore. He’d destroy her enemies. If he could, he’d take down this Witch Queen, too. The runes would lead him there eventually.

At his feet, the knight of the broken shield gave one final gasp before breathing no more. Cú nodded to himself and crouched down, dipping his fingers in the man’s lifeblood. With wet fingers, he drew several burning runes in the air and watched how they moved for a few moments. He realized he’d absently begun sucking the blood off his fingers whe he felt the tiny flicker of magical energy in the blood merge with him.

Scowling, he yanked his fingers from his mouth. It was a miniscule amount of magic, but even being careful, even using only his skills, the previous six fights had drained him enough that he noticed. But drinking blood for magical energy wasn’t a path he was ready to pursue. After all, he liked a challenge in his fights and the more drained he became, the better he had to be.

He wet his fingers again, drew another set of runes, and wiped his fingers on the dead man’s cloak. These runes burned and grew, fading as they did. But when Cú shifted into spirit form, he could still detect them, still follow them. They would guide him to his next target, to whomever the knight would have passed his sword and his grudge onto. It might be the Witch-Queen. But, considering the man’s expression before he died, Cú suspected he died resenting her, so probably not.

He’d find out soon enough.

ii. Jekyll and Hyde

It took Jekyll a moment of timeless suffering in utter sensory deprivation to realize he’d never actually experienced Hyde truly angry. His alter ego switched between malicious boredom and sadistic glee with some regularity, with bursts of violent frustration when his pleasures were thwarted. But _anger_ required caring about something and Hyde had always left that part of things to Jekyll.

But Hyde was furious now. His rage crackled off him as he loomed over Jekyll in their shared headspace. With their sense of their physical body annihilated by whatever had captured them, Jekyll had no escape, no distraction for his other self’s punishing wrath. He backed away, trying hard to think. He’d always been better at thinking than Hyde, but it was a challenge right now. Panic at what had happened still fogged his thoughts. He’d been so afraid of what Hyde would do to the injured Serendipity if he ‘rescued’ her. He’d taken control, stumbled at the shock, and they’d instantly been captured by the awful blankness that the enemy wielded as weapon and shield.

“You think you hate me that much?” growled Hyde, his nails long and inhuman. “So much you’ll leave our Master to be cut by _somebody else_? Let somebody else open that smooth skin, lick the blood away, hold her close after? Oh no, I might touch her, better that she suffer with them so your hands won’t get dirty? You hate me that much?” His growl smoothed, becoming the searing pain of a rusty scalpel. “You haven’t felt anything yet.”

A small framed painting appeared in his hand: a landscape from near Edinburgh. A young lady had sent it to Jekyll once, courtesy of her brother and his schoolfriend, after he’d escorted her on some pleasant afternoons at a house party one summer. He accepted it as a token of their brief friendship, but he’d laughed when her brother had bluntly told him she was sending those miniatures to everybody who couldn’t politely refuse them. The story of the gift, and those days with Miss Violet remained one of his precious memories even now.

Hyde tapped the painting against one palm. “I know what it is. You don’t think you can hold me back anymore. Even with that flowery bastard’s magic little rings.” Jekyll watched helplessly, unable to deny it. “Can’t even do the basic job you were born for.”

With a sudden violent twist, Hyde broke the painting from its frame. Then, almost gently, he spread the painting on the table of their mental parlour. “Pretty little lies.” He traced his finger over stylized hills, and paint flaked away. “Let’s see what’s underneath!”

The memory that swept over Jekyll was breathtakingly visceral—the soft breeze, the scents of greenery, the lady’s perfect expression as she gasped. Jekyll’s precious memory, but tainted with the wicked filth of Hyde’s fantasies. “I always did think she’d scream so well. Mmm… And I was right!”

Jekyll whimpered and realized he’d knotted his hands behind his back, as if he could hide them from himself. He tried to remember the purity of her smile, but all he could see was Hyde’s vision of how she’d squirm.

The other man tossed the ruined painting aside and picked up a leatherbound book, a collection of riddles. Delicately he opened it to the inscription inside. “To my favorite student, from Doctor Johnson,” he read aloud, and Jekyll remembered his mentor from university: a kindly, white-haired man with an eclectic collection of books and an open door for a troubled young man.

Hyde scratched his nails across the inscription and once again his fantasies crept into Jekyll’s memory: the books, tumbled everywhere. The inscribed page, splattered with blood. Doctor Johnson would have struggled and thrashed, but Hyde could have easily held him down until he tied him into his chair.

Jekyll pressed his red-stained hands against his eyes, as if that would shut out the visions. Hyde’s laugh was edged like a knife. “Stupid, weak Henry. Ruining everything for us. And I thought you were useful.”

Swallowing painfully, Jekyll whispered, “Stop blackening my memories.”

“ _Your_ memories?” Hyde bared his teeth and tangled his fingers in a locket Jekyll’s sister had treasured as a child, given to her by her beloved governess. “Is it _you_ who remembers Miss Tennyson, _you_ who spent hours spying on her through the hole in the schoolroom wall?” The cheap metal tarnished and the clasp of the locket flew wide. Blood dripped from within. “These are _my_ memories, Henry. You just colonized them when you moved in. Stripped away all the _vitality_ and _flavor_ from them like the goody-two-shoes you are.”

Hyde dropped the locket carelessly on the table and then bent to pick up the discarded painting, placing it precisely beside the book of riddles. His hand, as crimson as Jekyll’s, trembled as he adjusted the book’s position. “All these memories I let you steal from me, so you’d feel real. So you’d feel strong. All these lies I reinforced, for you.” He gave Jekyll a twisted grin. “It always ends like this, doesn’t it? You hating me more than you love anything else?”

Jekyll stared at the patterned carpet of their parlour: dark red patterns on a cream background. In some places, especially on Hyde’s side, the pattern was almost the black of old blood. One of them was obviously lying about who’d known Miss Tennyson and Miss Violet, but which one? Suddenly Jekyll wasn’t so sure. But he knew that wasn’t important right now. Ren was still in danger. Ren, who had found them within their parlour by accident once. He’d pushed her out before Hyde could capture her there. For her sake? For his? Or simply to thwart Hyde?

Pressing his fingers against aching temples, Jekyll glanced up into the mirror in the mantlepiece before him. The lust he’d felt for Serendipity throbbed in his veins, and he tasted her blood on his lips still. For a moment, the taste of her seemed like the only thing in the world that was real.

_It is_ , Hyde whispered. _She wants us, she accepts us._

The mirror cracked as Jekyll slammed his hand into it, shattering into a thousand pieces. “You would have killed her yourself if you’d gotten her away! All I wanted to do was save her!”

Bouncing shards reversed their path, flowing back into the mirror again until Hyde glared out at him. He leaned forward against the glass that separated them. “ _Liar._ ”

_You are me and I am you._

What was a man? Flesh, thoughts, emotions. Just as the heart pumped blood through a circulatory system, the brain passed thoughts through identity, personality. Where in all of that was he? Was there anywhere Jekyll was that Hyde was not?

Was there anywhere Hyde was that Jekyll couldn’t be?

He tasted Ren’s blood again, and then felt the softness of her lips against his. A shudder ran through him as he remembered when he’d first touched her. That initial night after he’d been summoned, in the Great Hall, when she’d inadverdantly tempted Hyde to the surface and he’d forced a kiss on her. That night, when Jekyll had yanked Hyde back, and then stepped into his place and kissed her again, driven by a hunger for intimacy that had followed him beyond the grave.

He’d made a medicine to eradicate his own evil ( _pretty lies a cherub’s face the best mask doesn’t know it’s a mask)_ so that the self-control all men struggled with would no longer be necessary. So that man’s goodness would come naturally.So that being good would be _easy._

What a fool he’d been. He’d always had a bad habit of reaching far too high.

_Play God and get the devil’s gift_ , Hyde whispered. _The magical power to say_ , “ _That wasn’t me. I’m no monster.” And if it’s a lie, you can still blame the devil in the end._

Jekyll looked up, meeting the other’s crimson gaze in the glass.

The book of riddles on the table beside him opened to a page inscribed with: **_I only exist when you are here. Where you never were, I can never be._**

Hand to hand. Eye to eye. Jekyll stared at the man before him. _Mask, or mirror._ He could be one, or the other. There was no room for anything else. And he knew he _wanted_ to exist. He found his existence good. Yet was it right? It was potentially a complex ethical problem.

_Oh god fucking dammit._

Obscenities notwithstanding, he was Doctor Henry Jekyll. He _thought_. He measured. He analyzed. He compared. It didn’t take too long before he discovered an interesting fact: _they’d be more powerful as partners._

For a frozen moment, Jekyll faced a struggle between his principles. Ren needed protection, salvation. _Him._ The little voice that demanded zero tolerance for evil raged against his aching desire to improve himself, to find a way out. To save her. It took Hyde’s growl to jolt him out of it, Hyde’s growl to remind him that they shared that one singular passion, that _drive_ for self-improvement, though it was greed in one and ambition in the other. It was the root from which they were born, and, once considered made the idea of partially merging irresistable.

Images overlapped.

Jekyll reached within himself and pulled out Hyde’s memory of the not-quite-last time he’d touched Serendipity. For a moment, moon and shadow flickered around him and he held the curve of her breasts as she clutched at him. He felt the trill of her throat against his mouth.

That was all it took. Jekyll blinked in surprise as he suddenly _understood_ why Hyde cared. “Oh.”

_Yep_ , said Hyde.

“Oh my, she’s so much _warmer_ than I expected.” Jekyll wrapped his arms around himself, but it was as nothing compared to the comfortable fire that had flickered in Ren. That uncanny sense of two hearts pounding as one. It was, after too long alone, a _connection—_

He frowned. “It’s magic, that’s all. It’s the summoning.”

_Who the hell cares_? _It_ feels good. _I want more, and so do you. That’s why you keep forgetting each time you touch her._

That was… plausible. Absently Jekyll continued following the memory until he’d experienced every moment of it. Then he thought of what he knew of events _after_ Hyde’s memory. After some contemplation, he realized he had mixed feelings about them.

He adjusted his glasses and said thoughtfully, considering their merged memories, “Merlin is undeniably wise in many ways.”

_He’s a moron._

“I’ve always known I couldn’t possibly compare to him in any way. I respect him, despite his… personality quirks.”

_C’mon, stop fucking around._

“And yet how can I hope to improve myself if I don’t reach beyond my grasp?”

_Damn straight. Let’s save her first._

Jekyll smiled, opened his eyes, and began to deconstruct the unnatural emptiness around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only half of what I outlined, but this seemed dense enough to post as is. Questions? Comments? Drop 'em below, or come to my [Discord.](https://discord.gg/C4wcxKE)
> 
> More soon. The outline is already written!


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